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Master Resource: General Public Discussions of men in heels

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2 minutes ago, HappyinHeels said:

HellHeels,

Welcome to our site. Normally I look for new members in the "Hellos, Goodbyes, Introductions" section on the home page. Post something there about when you first liked heels and where you live with a bit more context. Yes, post a photo of what you bought in the "Who has bought new boots" section as well. We like photos. HinH

Will do!

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On 12/18/2018 at 12:30 AM, HappyinHeels said:

MackyHeels,

I  think p1ng74 is neither pointing out your fashion sense is wrong nor is he certifying you are crazy indirectly or directly. Fashion sense is highly subjective and its beauty or not is in the eye of the beholder. P1ng74 is neither trained professionally to render a diagnosis for you nor does his pattern of thoughtful posts tell me he is about to declare you crazy. Perhaps if you posted what YOU wore and not that of women you saw on the street or in print media we could have a better dialogue. We are interested in what you wear and the positive aspects you experienced. We are not interested in 600-word diatribes about soap opera-like actions and reactions. I feel like reading your posts is reliving a scene from "the Matrix". Macky appears in skinny jeans and heels and the stares descend upon him like lasers in slow motion. My best advice:  Be concise. Be positive. Post pictures of yourself.  It's no more complicated than that. I would like for you to get more from your outings than a knot of stares and gasps or whatever it is. Untangle your interactions with the world and you'll be able to relax. Can you relax? That may be the first question. I'd like for you to get more from this website rather than making it a dumpsite for your negativity. Confidence starts with love of self before the first step outside can be confidently taken. HinH  

HinH, I personally have given up reading his posts.  Generally very negative, and quite honestly, they are rarely about heels, rather focusing on yoga duds or some such thing.  They don't really apply to the focus of HHPlace in my opinion.  

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Yep, me too. We have tried to encourage him to be more positive, but to no avail. I ignore his posts now. I think several of us do.

Steve

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Harraumph.........

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6 hours ago, Steve63130 said:

Yep, me too. We have tried to encourage him to be more positive, but to no avail. I ignore his posts now. I think several of us do.

Steve

Indeed.   Quite apart from the lengthy and tedious repetition of largely irrelevant subject matter, the posts are by no means an easy read, possibly because English is not his first language.   I'm sure that anything worth saying could be said succinctly and literately, in which case it might be better received and responded to.   (To be fair, Macky is not the only culprit; if the cap fits ...)

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mackyheels/ your body figure in tight femmine clothing is something that those women want on them. they don't dare admit it to your face. it's like how dare he look better than us in that outfit, it's unacceptable for a guy to look better than us. you should save your money up on buying a pair of kate louboutins with those tight jeans because you will have a great time wearing them out. also you might get some young girls trying to steal them off your feet. you said many times that women demand you take your outfits off and give it to them to wear. at least be flattered by there jealousy/envy of you.

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19 hours ago, Rick24 said:

mackyheels/ your body figure in tight femmine clothing is something that those women want on them. they don't dare admit it to your face. it's like how dare he look better than us in that outfit, it's unacceptable for a guy to look better than us. you should save your money up on buying a pair of kate louboutins with those tight jeans because you will have a great time wearing them out. also you might get some young girls trying to steal them off your feet. you said many times that women demand you take your outfits off and give it to them to wear. at least be flattered by there jealousy/envy of you.

Oh! some ladies have told me so. Saying I want your butt and legs all along laughing giggling that it comes off as some sexual flirtation. When they really mean is they want to look like me and admittedly, wishing to wear the same clothes. Sounds strange but often we both laugh while i understand they are paying some sort of compliment to my physique and clothing. 

While true a single school teacher i'm currently keeping my eyes on and  often observed has said, finding me impeccably dressed and demanded i give her some of my clothes. Tongue tied and difficult to express her feeling upon my attire i figure it's more than that. Only because she observed for long period of time, different outfits i was wearing, not being possibly for me to wear them all.  Yet few woman have seen me in outfit i truly find outstanding  and really proud to be wearing.

Giving the idea Kate LB in some incredible skin tight denim jeans maybe slim chance in the future to be outfitted. One female at work stood in front of me as we both were trying pass one another. For brief time we both  looked upon one another. I scanned her entire body noticing her black Kate LB's and she stood puzzled at my reaction upon her heels as she looked down onto them as well. Nothing was said but any woman wearing LB's often startles me neck snapping reactions  onto her heels. 

While i'm flattered of the envy and jealousy from some woman. Even one kind open minded woman told me so in good way. 

Doubt any woman would want to steal my heels off my feet, would be funny to watch.. Lately wearing my Westin booties i've seen random woman looking upon my feet with wide eyes shock. Enjoy being femininely dressed for the reactions i get, some shocked that guy is wearing it, while others i know better, hide there envy and jealousy. Even today i seen from distance a woman wearing exact same leggings, style colour and brand. Could tell she was well dressed deliberately to look pretty. Once she noticed we had on the same outfit she immediately left don't know why. Maybe she needed to leave or felt despondent and that the room was crowded. Also  i could assume that she noticed me wearing exactly same clothes as her, feeling humiliated, self-conscious or less unique of her little outfit  after she wide eyed noticed me..  

Do know the reactions from young female attractive fashionistas often will want to rain on my parade whatever i want to wear. That is why my only revenge from the inevitable,  outspoken, indirect, negative, comments and opinions observing my outfit, is to wear best female clothes as i can afford.  When i know i'm better dressed than most women surrounding me i feel as they do, showing them up. It can be as simple wearing hot looking stiletto's bootie paired with tight  designer jeggings at grocery store, mall fully aware no woman will dare wear such dressy footwear doing errands. This outfit of mine stops competition, unlike if i were to go out into a bar in social setting, where females are clothed to impress or stand out from the crowd joined in group. Usually with shopping surroundings everyone is solo for the most part, there is little gang mentality togetherness to mock my outfit then being alone.

So when i know i have on great outfit woman desire the negativity grows exponentially with greater amount of comments and opinions. Often it is clue of there deep jealousy, envy, hatred bundled up, that if they were honest and loving would compliment me rather tossing  out despicable commentary to others about me to overhear. While i know it takes time to break down the wall many woman build around themselves with the likes of me. When the wall falls they become much better human beings and caring for others releasing the vacuum they lived in so many years. They enjoy greater freedom and enjoy life less seriously making into someone i can be friends with.  

Amusing to watch belittling woman angry about someone else, what they are wearing, while the boyfriend or husband listens to her commentary  amused at her overreactions. Feel little sorry for the male to be joined with mean spirited woman like i described often these clues lead to relationship problems and divorce while the other can't be in same room together.

Seen it already happen to neighbour woman found out and seen me wear feminine outfits laughed out loud initially even found it disturbing keeping her young girls away from my immediate family. Before long her not liking my style becomes  insignificant of a problem  then just me, boiling over into other areas of her life. Now she is separated husband couldn't take it anymore not because of me but her attitude in general. Shows you when  a woman is angered or upset and full of hate upon one person insignificant part of her life there is bigger issue at hand then someone like me wearing feminine attire. Isn't it?

 

 

Edited by MackyHeels

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Well, other than the heeled boots on the guy, this pretty much sums up what is totally wrong in women's fashions these days...lol

 

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On ‎12‎/‎18‎/‎2018 at 12:46 PM, HellHeels said:

Hi everyone, just found this site and am extremely excited to be around like-minded people.

Long story short, my gf at the time who is my wife now was pretty cool with me and heels in our early 20s, but I pushed it too far and let it take over our sex life and cared more about the heels than her. Eventually I got rid of them to show her that they aren't important for our sex life and I meant it. But recently I've been having temptations to just wear them again, and it's been at least 5 year since I wore any. So I bit the bullet and bought a pair of booties last week, I wear them when she isn't around the house and it feels great. Now in my head, I'm trying to find a way to bring it up to her, since I don't like hiding things. I'm trying to say something like "this is just for me, it doesn't have to exist in our sex life, I don't need them to have fun with you etc etc"... But I'm still sitting on it. 

I actually do want to take some pictures and share with you guys though. I feel very liberated in doing so.

Pleased to meet you all.

Great to meet you also buddy, your story is familiar.  I applaud you for being open about your love of heels when you met your gf/wife,  I wish I had been up front and honest.   I also applaud you for attempting to abandon your love of heels in favor of your marriage, I'm hoping your wife appreciates your sacrifice, and realizes how big a sacrifice it was.   Unfortunately, I don't think we can "turn off" our love of heels.  Many of us have sold off/gotten rid of our heels, but like yourself, we usually can not resist the strong urge to start a new collection and get back into the heels we love. 

I hesitate to advise, only because your situation is delicate indeed, and I surely don't want to make things worse.  But, I will say, that eventually you will have to let the wife know about your new booties.   Things will be much worse if she finds out on her own.  I have made so many mistakes that have created permanent damage to my relationship.  My life would be complete if I could help just one heel guy not repeat my mistakes.  So, I will recommend listening to the advice you will get here, and use what you think will he helpful for your situation. 

I am glad you found us buddy, please post some pictures and enjoy your now booties....Don

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Turns out the market for heels for men also includes a “mini market” demand for Margiela’s Tabi boot.

As reported by The Business of Fashion.

 

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37 minutes ago, kneehighs said:

Turns out the market for heels for men also includes a “mini market” demand for Margiela’s Tabi boot.

As reported by The Business of Fashion.

 

Hmm! Most interesting! But, what would one wear with such shoes?

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53 minutes ago, JeffB said:

Hmm! Most interesting! But, what would one wear with such shoes?

Probably when kicking some ass in a dark alley?

Seriously, these are not new--my elder son had a pair for a while, minus the heel, but he's somewhat obsessed with all things Japanese.  I really don't every expect to run into a pair of these on the streets of Iowa, or even Chicago anytime soon. Well, ever.

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I liked this quote:

“I love that some people hate or are scared of them,” he chuckled. “They’re the kind of shoe that when people don’t know what they are, they’re grossed out by them, and when people do, they’re appreciative and it’s like you’re in this little ‘it’ circle.”

As if heels for men are some type of non-verbal status signaling to others.

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Surprised no one has posted this article from US Vogue.com

Men In Heels? I Put the Tricky Trend to the Test

Authors conclusion "The final verdict? Men’s heels are much more of a commitment than my go-to sneakers, sure, but can give you that extra pep in your step. I found myself walking taller, and even feeling more confident along the way. Sometimes, I even strutteddown a hallway at work, as though I was Bella Hadid. (I am most definitely not.) And that change of demeanor, at least for me, is worth the aching arches and pinched toes alone."

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47 minutes ago, kneehighs said:

Surprised no one has posted this article from US Vogue.com

Men In Heels? I Put the Tricky Trend to the Test

Authors conclusion "The final verdict? Men’s heels are much more of a commitment than my go-to sneakers, sure, but can give you that extra pep in your step. I found myself walking taller, and even feeling more confident along the way. Sometimes, I even strutteddown a hallway at work, as though I was Bella Hadid. (I am most definitely not.) And that change of demeanor, at least for me, is worth the aching arches and pinched toes alone."

While the article is positive overall, I can’t help but wonder if some of the “pain” of wearing 2-2.5” heels that the author described may be a little exaggerated.  Many years ago I jumped straight into wearing 2” dress heels all day on business trips and I don’t remember feeling out of sorts at all.  On the other hand, I do remember how nice the soft Lucchese leather felt on the feet and calves.  Good quality and fit make a difference when it comes to boots and heels.  Maybe the author found “pains” because he was expecting them and therefore became sensitive to the changes.  

In my experience, moving to 2” and 2.5” heel wad such a subtle change that it had no impact on  daily life and lifestyle, and required no special “commitment”.  3” had a distinct feeling at first, but not one that really affected my daily routine any more than breaking in any pair of shoes.  For me, it wasn’t until 3.5” and 4”+ that I had anything worth writing home about.  

But I’ll take any positive direction towards men wearing heels - even if it is just inspiring urbanites to do what cowboys have done for centuries...

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Posted (edited)

As you say, he exaggerates the effects of wearing a 2.5 inch heel. At 6’1” he would have fairly large feet I should think - I do! - and so the 2.5 inch heels would have even less effect on him than on those with smaller feet, but I expect that was all part of his artistic/journalistic license. Overall it was a cheerful, upbeat story that presented men in heels in a positive light.

Edited by Shyheels
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I found myself thinking the same thing.  Seriously, arch pain from those shoes?  I wore what were considered conservative shoes in the 70's that had that much heel and never even thought of them is being "high" - and certainly no pain from them.  

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Posted (edited)

I think on some level it is a defence mechanism - a way of communicating an idea that wearing heels is so far removed from his reality, that he is such a stranger to all this; that it really isn’t him.

He mentions nearly face planting - in 2.5 inch heels? With what must be fairly big feet if he’s 6’1”. The idea again, I think, is to reaffirm and reassure that he is totally a novice, that wearing heels is utterly outside his normal experience. 

Edited by Shyheels
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Looking at the Shoes (Boots) he was wearing in the picture, the color of them would attract more attention than the height of the heels, even though they appear similar in shape to heels on women’s boots.  I wouldn’t hesitate to wear them in public in a less attention attracting color.

 

 

 

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Posted (edited)

The garish colour is another defence - leaning into the punch, making sure nobody thinks he is taking this too seriously, that this is only a bit of fun. It’s why every time you see a male journalist experimenting with a day in heels it is always in some garish patent thing - usually scarlet pumps - to accentuate the perceived ridiculousness of it.

Unlike the usual journalist-trying-heels story, this guy allowed himself to say he rather enjoyed the experience. It was refreshing and commendably bold of him.

Edited by Shyheels
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Yes, wearing a modest (c2.5") cuban heel for the first time does feel 'different' - and perhaps a little insecure, especially if the heel has a narrower base.   I experienced that in my first pair of such boots several years ago (and duly reported here).   But the writer (almost the same height as me) was almost certainly exaggerating his physical experience, either for journalistic effect or because, subconsciously or not, he wanted to draw extra public attention to his daring adventure.   Why else would he wear those lurid green boots if not for effect (on observers)?

All that said, it was a more balanced and genuine account than is usually the case when a man ventures out in 'heels' as an experiment.   But he would really need heels of around 3.5" or more to truly experience the effect. 

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I have never read an article about men in heels that I was completely happy with, and I wonder if I will. I'm sorry, those aren't high heels. There, I said it. If 2 inch, broad heels like that are causing you serious discomfort, then either the shoes fit very badly, or you have serious foot health issues. I am sure the drama was mostly concocted to make the story either more presentable or more interesting. Yawn. At least it was mostly positive. It's just too doggoned bad he couldn't have run into one of us during his week of exposition. That would have made a much more interesting story.

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People have to start somewhere.  For the vast majority of guys who have never worn 2” heels, I highly recommend they add them to their wardrobe.  The guys on YouTube who jump straight into 4” for 24 hours are mostly trying to make entertainment, rather than seriously considering the pleasure of regularly wearing heels.  I wonder if the author of the Vogue article continued to wear heels after his 3 day experiment.  It sounded like he would, but he didn’t say straight up.  I know from personal experience that sometimes it takes wearing 2.5” heels for a while before curiosity pushes us higher.  For this reason, the more guys we have wearing 2.5” heels, the better, even if they aren’t considered “high” by HHP standards. 

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I read the article and I do consider it generally to be a positive article. He may have actually pushed the trend forward if he had told us that he continued to wear these boots after his trial period. This way we would know he's acting as a person trying new things and not just as a journalist. The article is lacking in any real interactions he had, after all, in a city of 8.6 million people. I think most reading this article will just consider it another non-relevant piece from inside the liberal bubble of NYC.

At 6'1' the author is not tall by American standards. The average U.S. male in 2019 is 6' 1.5" and the average in the Northern states is even higher. A 2.5" block heel should not have caused that much discomfort. He either has foot issues or the boots were ill-fitting. I, instead, believe the article was a subliminal attempt to show deference to women. It was, after published, right around International Women's Day which was last Friday the 8th. I agree he wanted to communicate he is a novice and, by extension, that heel-wearing men is not mainstream. HinH

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I'm not sure where you get that 6' 1.5" height for the average American male - according to the CDC the average height for an American male is just a fraction over 5'9" (I just checked) Even in The Netherlands - which has the tallest average height of any Western society - the average male is only just over 6'

 

 

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On 3/12/2019 at 1:39 PM, kneehighs said:

Surprised no one has posted this article from US Vogue.com

Men In Heels? I Put the Tricky Trend to the Test

Authors conclusion "The final verdict? Men’s heels are much more of a commitment than my go-to sneakers, sure, but can give you that extra pep in your step. I found myself walking taller, and even feeling more confident along the way. Sometimes, I even strutteddown a hallway at work, as though I was Bella Hadid. (I am most definitely not.) And that change of demeanor, at least for me, is worth the aching arches and pinched toes alone."

I found the article to have been interesting, even though I had been initially blinded by those lime green boots.

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I guess I shouldn't be so negative about these articles where men try high heels, but after reading through the replies here, I think that yeah, in almost every case, the men wearing heels fall into one of two categories: 1) Unapologetic heel wearers who otherwise dress outlandishly, or 2) more mainstream guys who take some sort of "challenge." This includes fashion reporters who are assigned by their bosses to try heels and write an article.

I don't know why I should be negative about any of this, but I can't help myself--that's just my initial reaction to most of these. Why the gaudy lime green boots? Who is going to wear those, like, ever? As Shyheels and Puffer opined, it must be somewhat of an excuse to make sure that people don't think he's taking this too seriously, when what we as a community could really use is something that might make your average guy think, "I wonder if I could pull that off myself?"

I will admit, however, to being part of the problem half of the year. In the winter, I could be a fine ambassador for "normal guys wearing high heels." However, in the summer, I admit to pushing the boundaries more than a bit, especially for my age range. I therefore only have so much room to complain.

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On 3/12/2019 at 1:39 PM, kneehighs said:

Surprised no one has posted this article from US Vogue.com

Men In Heels? I Put the Tricky Trend to the Test

Authors conclusion "The final verdict? Men’s heels are much more of a commitment than my go-to sneakers, sure, but can give you that extra pep in your step. I found myself walking taller, and even feeling more confident along the way. Sometimes, I even strutteddown a hallway at work, as though I was Bella Hadid. (I am most definitely not.) And that change of demeanor, at least for me, is worth the aching arches and pinched toes alone."

I read an article where John Fluevog was asked why he made shoes that were bad for women's feet.  Supposedly he replied with something like, "Because it is so good for their heads!"

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