Leaderboard

I finally did it! No, not another outing. There are always those. But I finally checked something off the perverbial bucket list, so to speak. I was on vacation, and I stopped in at a Nordstroms. I live in Canada, so I don't get to some of the American chain stores very often. I went to the shoe department. I was suprised to find that they sold Christian Loubotins. I started looking at the display models. This was the first time I had seen one in the flesh. I had only previously seen them in photos. It was also the first time I had held one in my hand. I am usually an EU40 for size. As luck would have it they had a black peeptoe on display in my size. So it turned out to be the first time I had tried one on my foot. I couldn't wait to put it on, and so I did. It was a little tight but it fit. Then I found a different shoe in a 41. So off went the 40, and on went the 41. Perfect fit! The salesmen came by and asked if I needed a size. I was tempted to ask him for the mate, but I didn't. I told him I was just looking and I had never tried one on before. He told me they are not the most comfortable shoes, but they look great, and that is why people by them. Once it was on my foot, and I looked in the mirror, I was sold! I felt like Cinderella putting on the glass slipper. But then came the letdown. The $800 price tag lol. But I can now say I have had one on my foot. And in the off chance I ever do buy a pair, I will know to go up one size. I had heard a lot of people say they run small. And now I know for sure.

There were some responses to various threads on which I wanted to comment but, admittedly, I am too lazy to go back and try and find them. Thus, I going to throw out a melange of thoughts here - think of it as High Heel goulash. First, someone had mentioned the idea of more men wanting to wear heels in public but for reasons unknown, do not do so. For a time, I was an assistant administrator of a group promoting men wearing high heels in public on a different social media platform. I happened to notice a few trends worthy of discussion based solely on my observations, and not on research or scientific data. It appears that the number of men who actually wear heels in public is but a very small percent of those who want to do so. It seems that fear over some sort of negative reaction, consequence, or the expectation of "men being men" was the greatest hurdle to doing so. This is completely understandably as the idea of men wearing heels or dressing "en femme" is still taboo and may always be to some. Although I could not make any sort of reasonable estimation, I would believe it is fair to say there are a fair number of men out there who will forever hold a secret desire to wear heels out in public but the fear of reaction to such prevents them from doing so. One of the reasons I stepped away from this group was due to the fact that, although it was created with the purpose of getting society to accept men wearing high heels, very few of the contributions to it were of men wearing heels in public. I came to believe that many of the members held a deep fantasy of wanting to wear heels in public and this was as close as they could get to doing so. Next, I seem to recall a thread somewhere about whether the excitement of wearing heels in public fades after a while. I given this a lot of thought and my answer is "Yes" and "No." My wearing heels of any height in public is now my norm, so yes, the thrill of doing so has faded to some degree. There are still times when it is exciting such as when I am wearing a new style of heels or outfit. Recently, I started wearing open-toe heels (and Espadrilles) in both public and to work, and it was exciting the first few instances of such as I believed that I would never do so. Now that we are heading into the autumn and the cooler weather, boot weather will soon be here and I am excited to finally be able to wear a skirt to the office (As previously noted, my office is so over air conditioned, heavy clothes are required in the summer to remain warm and thus, my summer skirts are "too thin" to be worn there). So, I suppose it is fair to say that the thrill of wearing heels in public does diminish when it becomes the "norm" or is, in fact, expected. For me, however, the thrill of wearing heels in public is still exciting because before I head out to wherever, I take a look at myself in the mirror and love what I see. Likewise, I park my car at the farthest end of my building's parking lot and at the end of my work day as I head to my vehicle, I see my reflect in the other cars I pass along en route. Simply seeing my outfit or even knowing that it is "cute" still develops a tremendous emotional charge for me. I adore the look of wide leg pants pair with a pair of kitten heels and knowing that I am wearing such is an addictive rush. Also, when I receive a compliment on either my outfit as a whole or even part of it, it makes it all worthwhile. Finally, somewhere a member had posted a response about Hunter rain boots. Do not get me wrong, I have the greatest appreciation for knee high rain boots and appreciate their practicality. I, however, would only wear them as a means to keep my feet dry when it is wet outside and to prevent me from destroying a pair of heels by having to navigate around puddles of standing water. Well, sometime ago I saw these and when they went on sale, jumped on getting a pair - style and practicality all in one!

Found myself in an interesting conversation this morning in my hotel. I am leading a tour group at the moment and someone was talking about achilles tendon problems. A woman, one of our guests, spoke up and said, matter of factly 'Men can't do this of course, but women can wear heels to ease the strain on the tendon." To which I replied, just as matter of factly: "Men can do that." She gave a start and spluttered, "Well ... I ... I ... suppose they could ..." I left it at that.

I would say that my "fascination" with boots and heels began when I was just a little kid. I have often wondered if this "fascination" is something I learned, or was I hardwired this way. Unfortunately, I waited until my late 40s-50s to actually allow myself to admit that I wanted to wear high heel boots and get some.... It has taken me many years since then to develop the courage and confidence to wear them in most any setting these days without the usual self imposed negative feelings. Thanks to all my friends here for your help. Don

Although I've had a fascination with heels since childhood, I did not actually start wearing heels for real until age 44, in 2012. I started with clogs before that, but the first time I wore shoes with an obviously elevated heel was in May of 2012. They were also clogs, but with about a three inch heel. I stuck with clogs for quite a long time before I tried some other styles, and today I will wear just about anything that I find attractive.

I acquisitioned my first wife’s shooties (shoe-bootie) one day in the late 70’s because my dress shoes didn’t look good with the suit I had on. I was in my early 20’s. They became my dress shoes until I wore them out in the late 90’s. Great leather shoes with a 2.5 inch heel. Then in about 2008 I needed water shoes for a trip to Hawaii. They ran out of men’s in my size. So, I tried the women’s size 10 and the men’s size 10. To my surprise the women’s size ten fit better than the men’s size 10. In 2011, I researched shoes that fit my feet and it turned out to be women’s. Haven't bought a pair of men's shoes since then. I started with 1.5 to 2.5 inch booties. Today I only wear women’s shoes. Mostly 4 inch heels everywhere including board meetings.

I'll second that - and for the same reasons. Platforms spoil the elegance of high heels and often do indeed look clownish

Totally agree, platform thickness makes all the difference. At under 1 inch it doesn't matter too much. I mostly wear single soled heels but have several thinner plats. I just think thick platforms look bad, clownish in many cases.

I ran across an Instagram post the other day which was a split screen of a model's feet. On one half, the model was wearing what looked to be 4 inch stiletto sandals. On the other half, the model was wearing 4 inch block heels with a mild platform, less than an inch. The caption read something to the effect of, "Which one is more likely to cause you to sprain your ankle?" I have yet to answer one of these kinds of things, even though I want to. I didn't reply to this for two reasons: 1) I was on my phone, and didn't feel like typing out a long reply, which is what it would take. 2) The post was already 3 weeks old, and had probably 500+ replies. I don't need to waste my time for that. My answer, of course, would be, "It depends." For most situations I am in, however, the single sole stiletto is more my friend, though I can't say that I'm worried about spraining my ankle in any case. I wear platforms all the time out in the wild, and it's absolutely true that if you step on a pebble or a twig in platforms, it's going to apply a lot of unwelcome sideways force to the ankle, a force that would be much less in single soles, regardless of heel configuration.

Two nice sightings in London yesterday. Late afternoon at a tube station near me in outer London (Zone 4) a woman wearing 3" stiletto pumps. Absolutely at ease in them, walked down the stairs without holding the handrail. Then on the train, a smartly dressed couple, perhaps about 50. She was wearing black suede boots, just on the knee rather than over. About 2" block heel. They might have been going to the theatre as they got off at Leicester Square.

Yes I’m in a hotel in the Lake District. I give lectures and accompany tour groups on occasion. It’s a nice supplement to writing and photography. Boat life suits me perfectly. It more challenging as a single hander, but not a dealbreaker. I’ve picked up a lot of new skills - I’ve needed to! The canals in the Pennines are the most challenging in the network especially for singlehanders. That said, I love the freedom and slow pace.

This is born out in the number of visitor HHP gets compared to the number of posting member. I can testify the fear is real. I remember back to the time when I switched to women's shoes. I was fearful. And then when I went to booties with 2 inch heels, the click-click sound scared me, making me think/fear everyone was watching. But I realized some men's shoes also clicked. Going to 4 inch heels was also fearful. But you get over it. I have worn 4 inch high heels in public for almost 10 years now. Certainly the first year or two was exciting/fearful times. Now, I might have a inner excitement over having a new pair of heels on or just from the total look.IT'S JUST NORMAL. I don't think about my shoes except when traversing stairs or uneven pavement. (And I park as close to where I am going. I wear heels up to 16+ hours a day.) I love to wear my knee high boots on the outside of skinny pants, but have a few wider leg pants that I will wear now and then. For a fun outfit try knee high boots and short shorts in the summer.

For me it started in the 90's. If only because my feet were just too big for what was available in retail in the 80's. And when I gained the ability to live and more importantly travel by myself as a student in the 90's (we got free public transport as students in the Netherlands back then) I was finally able to go to fetish shops in Amsterdam that had shoes in sizes bigger then EU41. They were also all 12 to 14cm high, but what did I know at the time, so that was what I got used too with practice.

I've mentioned this before but it continually amazes me that tall boots are not in fashion for guys - either with or without heels. Here in England we've not really had a summer this year, especially up north where I live, and lately it has been far more like late October than late August. With cold hard rain, wind and chilly temperatures being the norm, boot season has arrived early - and once again I am happy be warm snug in my knee and OTK boots. The difference in warmth and comfort between wearing them and regular 'guy' shoes is startling. Not all of my tall boots have heels - it's about fifty-fifty - but all are perceived as feminine because boots have an element of theatre to them and that's considered a feminine attribute. Guys are not supposed to indulge in theatre when it comes to fashion, but to be all business and practical. But in cold weather boots could hardly be more practical. Surely they could be made fashionable for men? Perhaps if there were seen more? Obviously I'm doing my little part, but alas I doubt many people are going to be looking to a bohemian bargee for their style cues.

I found these by chance - and to my surprise they are (allegedly) available up to size USW15/UK13/Eu47, assuming that they run true to size: Link here: Women Thigh High Boots PU Leather Black Sky High Chunky Heel Over The – Prettyunik The heel height is not specified but looks at least 4". A tempting purchase, especially at the discounted price of £59.99 (with the same boots seen elsewhere at £150 or so), but I will have to pass. Little of the other footwear from this supplier ('Prettyunik', about whom I know nothing) is available in sizes above USW11 or 12.

Am I the only who is sick of Taylor Swift? But your point is spot on.

I agree - I suspect plenty of guys would secretly like to try wearing boots and/or heels, for curiosity’s sake and the sheer pleasure of breaking ranks, if nothing else but are held in check by fearfulness. How nice it is to let go of that,

I'm with you buddy. I think I look great in my boots, and no longer care what other's think. I suspect many guys notice my boots, and are secretly envious....

I get the fact that heels are not as popular as they once were, and a lot of that has to do with the fact that women aren't expected or required to wear heels anymore. This, coupled with the fact that everyone, and I mean everyone, even those who supposedly love and live in heels, sets people up with the caveat, "Well, you just have to push through the pain. It's the cost of beauty." Even the author of this article said that, despite her professed fondness for heels, her feet and ankles were messed up from years of wearing heels at the law firm. My first question is, "Why did you let this happen?" There is no need for any of that. We know this. Why doesn't anybody else know it?

I had to take the day off work yesterday because my younger son had to have his wisdom teeth extracted, and I wanted to personally make sure he was ok after the procedure, having been through it myself, albeit nearly 40 years ago. Dentistry has come a long way in that time, but it is not always pain free. My son was a trooper, and did just fine. It will take a few days before he's back to doing his normal thing, though. I made the conscious decision to wear my normal clothes to the dentist office, which is not the same dentist I go to, so they've never had the pleasure of viewing my footwear up in the chair. I sat in the waiting room for over an hour, and I only got a bit of a sideways glance from an older couple during this time. I even saw my neighbor while I was in there, but he is already indoctrinated into the life of Melrose. I pulled out a pair of sandals I hadn't worn in a while, my BCBGeneration Poland. I've had these for quite a while, but I don't wear them often, and I'm not really sure why. Probably because I gravitate toward mules when I'm picking out something, and these obviously are not.

The weather has been brutal here as well, until yesterday, when it was less brutal. All this talk about "doing my part" has got me to thinking that I better check out my collection to make sure I don't need to replace or augment anything. I put quite a few miles on my black, block-heeled Vince Camuto knee-highs last year, and I was beginning to detect signs of possible failure. I can remember thinking that those boots were just for showing, not for walking. I really hope I'm wrong about that. I have run into the same phenomenon with shaving legs. It's perfectly acceptable IF you "have" to do it for some kind of sport, but otherwise. . . you a little weird.

Regardless of the weather I feel certain that there is a latent desire out there for a greater more daring choice in footwear among men and that tall boots would be a saleable proposition is marketed intelligently.

Yeah, the weather here has been brutal this week! It's not even boot season inside! Like you, can not wait for the cooler weather to break out my favorite boots!

I definitely do my part. Boot season is my fav. I am packed with otk and even thigh high. Prob 10 if that with no heel. Over 100 degrees in Chicago the last couple days. Definitely no boot weather. More like stay inside weather!

Hey, I do my part with knee high boots.

Yes, if you’re not riding a horse or a motorcycle - in short, have some accepted practical use for tall boots - you shouldn’t be wearing them, according to the uptight rules governing men’s fashion. Adding heels makes them even more unacceptable, but even flat soled knee and OTK boots will raise eyebrows if worn by a man. I wear knee and OTK boots as a matter of course, mainly low heeled ones given the fact that I live along muddy towpaths. To be fair I’ve only had a few comments - and nothing overtly negative - but it does surprise me that more men don’t wear them. It seems like this is one bit of formerly masculine fashion that we could reclaim

It's kind of a curious thing, isn't it? Here in Middle America, it has become way more acceptable for men to wear a wider variety of colors, and pink has become a favorite on the construction site. Maybe it's the Breast Cancer Awareness campaign that did it, but nobody even bothers to mention anything anymore if a guy shows up in a pink shirt, even if it's not Friday. However, outside of equestrian circles, I do not see tall boots on men around here. With one exception: Latino laborers. Maybe not knee high, but they often wear their boots on the outsides of their pants. Plenty of men still wear cowboy boots around here, but always on the inside, and I doubt we've got any secret knee-high Luccheeses underneath there.

Well...I did it. Open toe heels (sandals?) at work. Toe nails painted blue to match the blue espadrilles worn to an art exhibit at SLAM (St. Louis Art Museum) the past weekend. Heels - A.N.A. (Another New Adventure - found on eBay).

If we could but make heel wearing into a challenge, a sporting event of some sort, I bet it would come back pretty quickly.

Ah yes, Hunter boots - the very posh gum boots worn by the country gentry over here. I’ve a pair of those as well. Mine are the classic green. Extremely well made and good for walking. I too regret lost time - years of fretting over my partiality to what designated as feminine style boots. And now I marvel that I ever worried about it.

I think that the reason men do not wear tall boots outside of necessity (equestrian, parade uniform, etc.) is due to two reasons. First, a man wearing tall boots simply for the pleasure of doing so (heel height notwithstanding) may make that person appear a bit eccentric. The same could be said for a man (on this side of the Atlantic) wearing a beret or fedora, an ascot, or a cape. All of these may be perfectly fine items to wear at most anytime and, in fact, may be specifically designed for men but given how they may be viewed others, men would not want to wear them. It seems to me that most men are more comfortable in simply putting together an outfit very quickly and without much thought or fanfare rather than incorporating any sort of style into it. There are certainly occasions when this is appropriate, such as when one is running errands or may become sweating or dirty. I tend to think that for most men, however, the greatest effort they will extend in creating some degree of a fashionable/dressy outfit comes when they have to wear a jacket and necktie to some function/event. Second, it is rather clear that society is more concerned with quick comfort than class or elegance. Take a look at photographs of travelers (via airlines) in the 1950s. It is fairly noticeable that both men and women put effort into appearance for traveling. Photographs of crowds from our parents time (at least mine) show men and women dressed in "better" attire even for "routine" gatherings. And now? When you are at an airport, do you observe anyone (other than me) dressed up for the flight? Instead, one is bound to see torn jeans, flip-flops, and other clothing that is probably more appropriate for lounging around at home than being in public. Thus, the lack of any standards has certainly helped create a culture where putting some degree of effort into what is worn in public is no longer important, especially to today's younger folks. I'm sorry, but wearing "jeans" in public that are missing more fabric than that which is actually holding them together means they should be thrown away or more likely, not bought in the first place. Anyways.... I very much enjoy wearing tall boots and will do so in the future, and cannot wait for the arrival of cooler autumn weather to start doing so again. I have progressed to the point where I really do not give a [care] if someone thinks I look awkward, silly, ridiculous, or whatever. If they feel that way, that is their problem, not mine. I tend to think that those individuals who put effort into appearance when such is not required of them are seen as being somewhat eccentric when excessively casual seems to be the accepted norm/approach. For those who are interested, attached are photos of tall boots outfits I have worn to the office or out in public - simple but yet displaying some degree of style

For sure! Hoping I can join you sometime with my tall cowgirl boots and gloss black Hunter rain boots!

Exactly. Well fitting shoes are essential, high heeled or not. I had some (well padded) trainers some years ago that were badly made and the inner sole had a nasty edge on it, unnoticeable at first, that made hamburger out of my right foot. By the logic of people who write articles about heels, I should be condemning trainers as articles of torture, instead of simply noting they were badly made. Certainly no pair of heels messed up my feet like those!

Replacements? Yikes!!! Have you had any problems wearing heels due to the new joints?

Yes, some cyclists used to do that but for what specific purpose no one can say - lots of ideas but none of them actually bear scrutiny. It was fine because it was done and therefor the thing to do! Silly.

I know you do!

I went pretty casual (for me) to church yesterday. Part of the impetus for this was the fact that I thought I had overtaxed my right Achilles tendon last week, and I wanted to wear something a little bit lower, so as not to injure myself further. However, I have neglected these cute BCBGeneration wedges since I bought them, I think this is only the second time I've ever worn them, so it was about time anyhow. Despite the fact that we hadn't practiced nearly enough, Mickey and I were "on" yesterday. Sometimes, you get lucky and have those days.

We wound up buying the bike in question, which is nearly identical to the bike I had in my early to mid 20s, and which I rode through 2/3 of this country on. I think I probably had more miles on that bike than all the other bikes I've owned combined. The example we bought is basically a good solid machine, but there are a bunch of little things about it, the main one being that the brakes really suck. That's probably the reason I was able to offer substantially lower than what the guy was asking, and he went for it. The plan is to sell the 'old' bike to my older son, and I've finally got my own old bike sold, so we'll be down to five motorbikes again. Two around town scooters, one serious road bike, one fun bike, and my big scooter. Let's see. . . that's four for him, and one for me. The kid doesn't even have his real motorcycle license yet. What is wrong with this picture?

She is obviously committed to wearing heels as her natural look and style. Nice! I hope the motorcycle shopping went well!

I had occasion to visit my bank again yesterday. I sheepishly admit that we're headed out tomorrow to probably buy yet another motorbike (but hopefully divest ourselves of two), so I needed greater quantities of cash than I normally keep on hand. The bank lady was there again, and I guess she must be for real, because all four times in my life I've ever seen her, she's been wearing heels, and actual high heels at that. On this day, she was wearing what I would call loafer pumps with slim heels. Thicker than stiletto, but definitely not block. Given my vast experience, I would peg them at 4 1/4" high, no platform. There were a ton of people around, so I didn't say anything, once again.

It's been a while since I've snapped a picture, and I've got some new sandals to show off, Calvin Klein Fia. Our church choir had a little get together at a restaurant last night, and during the dinner, it was announced that we have at last found a new music director. That is very good news, because I'm not taking over the job, I just don't have the time or the energy. I have never had much luck with thong sandals lasting very long, so I went nuts and bought four pairs, hoping that among four of them, I would have something for at least a couple of years. This is the first pair to arrive. Shorts are by Talbots, and are called "Perfect Shorts." They're made of a very nice, dressier material, and would in fact be perfect were they a couple of inches shorter.

See, it wasn't that hard, was it? Free the toes!

New sign-up to the site. I'm a middle aged male living in the UK with a passion for high heels. I've enjoyed wearing them since a young age and finding something exciting about that. Looking to connect with like-minded people. My other interests are music, theatre, the arts, restaurants, travel and cars. Don't be shy come and say hi

Welcome to the forum! You’ll find this is a friendly and welcoming place - people of various backgrounds, nationalities and fashion tastes but sharing a common penchant for wearing heels. I look forward to hearing more from you

It is time for another trip to the cobbler. I have actually worn through a sole on my most durable pair of shoes, my True Religion mules, after 207 miles. I'm on my third set of heels with this pair, which have lasted an average of 80-90 miles each, a figure which is nothing short of remarkable, considering I was lucky to get 40 miles out of a set back in the day. What is also amazing is that I wore 4 1/2" stiletto mules to church today, and then later to the grocery store, and I realized as I was getting ready for bed last night, I didn't even really think about it all day. It's been a long while since the day I wore 4 inch boots to the mall (in retrospect, WAY too high for me at the time), and didn't think I was physically going to make it back to the car. I do not believe that I can credit only the years of walking in heels that has enabled me be able to wear quite high heels all day. I believe it is in combination of my foot exercises that I do to increase the strength and flexibility of my feet. I say this because I used to have foot pain from wearing flat work boots, and those days are also long in the past.

Hello from Russia. I want to tell you a little about myself, I am a man, straight, I have a beautiful, loving wife and daughter. I've always liked wearing high-heeled shoes. I clearly remember that the first time I felt the urge to wear high heels was when I was about 2 years old, when I saw high-heeled shoes on my mom's feet. Therefore, I think that my love for high heels has been with me since birth. At first, I tried on my mom's shoes, but then, closer to the age of 14, my foot grew and at the same time I decided for myself not to wear high heels anymore, because I thought that this was not normal. But at the age of 16, I realized that I was depriving myself of some important component of my life, without which it would be incomplete. Closer to the age of 20, I met my wife, with whom we have been living for more than 20 years. I was afraid to tell her about my addiction right away. It was only after 5 years of a relationship that I finally plucked up the courage and told her that I would like to wear high-heeled shoes. She was surprised, but she didn't say a single negative word and helped me choose my first pair, they were 13 cm stilettos. The moment I realized that my wife didn't mind my fascination with high heels, I felt like the happiest man in the world. Since then, I have been constantly replenishing my collection, which now has more than 30 pairs. For the most part, these are shoes and boots with stilettos from 13 to 18 cm, mostly without a platform. I wear all my shoes exclusively at home. I really want to wear stilettos in public, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to decide on it. Thanks to you, the people who post on this site, I still plucked up the courage and decided to sometimes wear cowboy boots with 11 cm block heels in public, which I recently purchased for this purpose. I really wanted to go out for a walk in these boots with my wife, but she categorically refused. I took two short walks alone in these boots, about 20 minutes each, in the park, early in the morning, when it was still dark. Like many of us, I was very anxious to see the reaction of the few people who saw me. I was seen by a young man who was jogging, I got the impression that he didn't even notice my heels. Another day, a married couple with a dog saw me, it seems to me that they saw my heels and began to discuss me, but I'm not sure, because I quickly got into the car and drove away. After about 2 weeks, I had to make a trip to another city. I decided that on the way to this city I would drive a car in boots, and so it was, but I did not have the courage to get out of the car in these boots and show myself in public, before each exit I changed into ordinary shoes. Then I lived in another city for a few days. Every evening, after sunset, I walked through the dimly lit evening streets in high heels. The few people I met along the way didn't tell me anything, although I heard some of them discussing me, others probably didn't even notice that I was wearing heels. Then it was time to return to my hometown, and I decided for myself that I would be wearing heels everywhere the whole way back. I visited several gas stations in the daytime in heels and did not receive a single negative review in my face, I only remembered the look of one guy, we almost came face to face, but it was most likely surprise. And a few months ago, I managed to persuade my wife to go for a walk, during which I put on my cowboy boots. We were walking near the house in the park, after sunset, I don't think any of the passers-by saw my heels this time. Although maybe I was just busy talking to my wife. Walking together with a loved one had a relaxing effect on me and gave me more confidence, for this reason I did not focus my attention on the reactions of others. I told my wife about my feelings. She replied that she had experienced some stress during the walk, although I admit I didn't even notice it. Now we walk in the park from time to time, I'm putting on my cowboy boots, but only in the evening. I don't know when I'll have the courage to go out in heels in the afternoon. I apologize in advance for such a long post, but I couldn't get any shorter. I want to thank all the participants once again, thanks to your posts, I realized that there is nothing unusual in my hobby, I just like to wear elegant shoes with high stiletto heels, which historically society has called women's. I hope that my story will help other men to talk more openly about their desires and wear shoes, clothes and things that they like.

Welcome to the site - it's a very friendly place here and a lot of people have had similar experiences and worries - although not everyone has such a tolerant and understanding wife. I just wear boots, typically with 8 to 10cm blocky heels, although I have a couple pair of stilettos. I don't wear my stilettos out - for one thing I've not practiced enough in them to be graceful - but I do wear my chunky heeled boots a lot and don't seem to be noticed, certainly not commented on. I can imagine it would be lovely to walk with a loved one - much less stressful, and quite uplifting. Not an experience I've had, unfortunately. Again, welcome to the forum!

Now that I have to get back to real life, note that I did ride my motorbike to church yesterday in these heels, and I did not crash. Nor did I draw any attention from the police, at least not to my knowledge. I hadn't worn my Miu Miu sandals in quite a long time, and I'm doing my best to spread the love to all the shoes I've decided to keep. Once again, I have no idea how I managed to walk in these things when I first got them, but I must have done so somehow. I wore these shoes for about 5 hours yesterday, and they were all right despite their extreme height. For whatever reason, Miu Miu brand seems to fit me just right, I only wish they weren't usually so expensive.

I think owning whatever look you choose to present - whether its heels or an idiosyncratic hat or waistcoat or livelier than usual colour combination - is the key to passing unnoticed. If you make it natural, that's how it will ultimately appear to others, even if they are momentarily startled