Shopping for heels: try them on?

[Bubba136]

I still got to get the courage to go to a shop and try some on, but the time will come tthen there will be no stopping me.

Go shopping with your girlfriend and try them on while she is with you. Her presence beside you, looking at the style, how they fit and giving you advice, will soften the sale person's curiosity.

[KrisS]

I had 2 interesting similar experiences within minutes of each other this week. I have been interested in over the knee boots this year and in a smaller mall in Toronto, I found 2 stores with boots I liked. Both stores were staffed by an Asian woman in their late forties. I have found Asian women of any age non-judging when I ask to try heels on. Anyhow, in both stores the ladies hesitated a moment when I asked to try them on, then smiled and said ok.

Now, as I tried them on, I was asked by both clerks, "Does she wear the same size as you?" obviously thinking I was trying them on for someone else.

All the times men say they are buying for someone else, these 2 people really thought I was. I replied, "No, they are for me." Big smiles. I didn't buy in either store but did find a pair of thigh highs the next day, tried them on - good thing because the usual 10 was too big and I went with size 9 - and have worn them since. You can see them at www.vangelo.ca, go to "women's" and then "Alondra-1"

[Thighbootguy]

The Alondra-1 doesn't seem to be listed anymore but congratulations on getting a pair of thigh boots. Enjoy them and let us know how/where you wear them.

[c_heels]

I never used to try them on, always bought at self serve type places. Lately though I've gotten more brave and have looked at and tried on (and bought one pair) shoes in stores with sales associates where you have to ask for the size. It's kind of interesting the range of responses. At Aldo, I asked for an 11 in a particular shoe, and they didn't have it. The girl asked what occasion "she" wanted them for, and when I told her they were for me her demeanor completely changed. She was almost nasty with "well our 11's are too small for you". Left there empty handed. Went to JcPenney, since I had seen a couple pair there that I liked. Cute associate, asked for an 11 and she brought them out, and motioned to the seats, grabbed a pair of the test nylon footies and came over, opened the box and handed me the footies. They were a little big, so she suggested trying a 10 and went and got them. They were a little small, so she started making other suggestions in other brands, etc, and commented on which ones she thought looked better on me. Needless to say I walked out with a new pair of heels. I went in to another dept store, Macy's, and it was just me in the shoe dept. The girl at the counter went and got the shoes I asked for, handed them to me with a pair of the footie things and walked away. Never saw her again. Not sure what her deal was, but I obviously didn't buy anything. Bottom line is my experiences trying them on have ranged anything from disgust from Aldo, to extremely helpful and being treated very well, to apparent indifference though I'm not sure what the last girl's deal was.

[danielp6406]

Bottom line is my experiences trying them on have ranged anything from disgust from Aldo, to extremely helpful and being treated very well, to apparent indifference though I'm not sure what the last girl's deal was.

Greetings c_heels :-)

Glad to see you finally tried on shoes in a store.

I am very surprised about the bad experience you got from Aldo.

I am a regular customer at Aldo and was always threated as any other customer.

All sales associates know me by name and we always talk about shoes and boots.

The manager once told me they are trained to serve all customers equally and with respect.

If I were you, I would get the salesgirl name and report her on their website or over the phone.

Happy heeling !

[roniheels]

Greetings c_heels :-)

Glad to see you finally tried on shoes in a store.

I am very surprised about the bad experience you got from Aldo.

I am a regular customer at Aldo and was always threated as any other customer.

All sales associates know me by name and we always talk about shoes and boots.

The manager once told me they are trained to serve all customers equally and with respect.

If I were you, I would get the salesgirl name and report her on their website or over the phone.

Happy heeling !

I totally agree. In this day and age with the USA and world economies the way they are, I would think a sales associate would have their main goal to try to satisfy the customer's needs and make the sale that will make the customer happy.

[jwhite44]

Here's a link for contacting customer service: http://www.aldoshoes.com/us/contact

A sentance, "As a man, I didn't think I should feel discriminated against while buying a pair of shoes in your store..." I'm sure will get someone's attention.

[Foxyheels]

Yes complain, if they had treated me like that I would have insisted on trying on every pair of stilettos in the shop making them give me the service they should provide before leaving without buying a thing and then complaining to their head office.

[HappyinHeels]

c heels, I too, am surprised by your treatment at either Aldo's or Macy's which are two stores regularly applauded by forumers here for the good service they show towards male heel shoppers. But corporate policy and an overall positive environment cannot stop the occasional narrow-minded bias that creeps into the retail industry. What helps correct this is education through direct contact. When you get crappy service you can walk out. It's quick and easy but leaves the door open for the person to do the same thing to someone else. Or, you can confront the situation by getting the person's name and speaking with a manager on-site or noting the store location, time of day, employee name, and basic facts of the encounter and communicationg these via email or a written letter to the corporate headquarters. If you don't demand your right as an equal consumer then you are marginalizing yourself and possibly others that may be shopping for the same thing. i used to buy heels either online or at a friend's store in Chicago that caters to a lot of guys who like heels but that's not mainstream. I've since, over the last two years, bought lots of heels at stores lie Baker's (known for their 5-6" heels) and am known by first name and try on heels in the store and many times in front of other women with no ill effects at all. Walk confidently into the store of YOUR choice, tell the first sales associate that comes near you what you are looking for and chances are you will have a great experience. They are there to help you and make a sale. Anyone not understanding that should not be working there. It's that simple. Chin up and heels high!! HappyinHeels:wave:

[Heelster]

Had to make an out of town delivery the other day. When I got there, I found out I couldn't make the delivery for about 3 hours, so off to find something to eat. When your running down a major highway, it always seems that all the fast food joints are near a shopping mall. Ate lunch and decided to check out the local shopping center. Ended up at a discount shoe store next to a mens workwear store (my original stopping point as I need new Steel toe work boots - Yuck) Now I gotta tell you I looked like hell. I'm looking like Willie Nelson after 12 hours as a grease monkey mechanic. Bandana, Cintas shirt with holes in it, crappy tee shirt nobody would ever wear other than to work, Cintas jeans with permanant stains and holes, and work boots that look like they were dragged up from the bottom of a grease pit (might as well be). I'm not what a sales person really wants to see in their store. Everything was actually clean (except my boots) but - - - Eeeeeuuuuuuu!!! I'm checking out the mid calf heeled boots and I'm trying a pair on when a stock girl walks by and tells me "Those are womens boots" of which I reply "I knew that" so she walks away rather rapidly. I'm thinking - - Yep, I'm her dinner table conversation tonight. I find a pair I like, and it's in my price range so I flag the sales associate. She comes over looking kinda timid as I ask her for the left boot so I can try them both on. She checks the box, and off she goes. She comes back about 3 minutes later with the left boot, and I try it on and walk a couple aisles while looking at the clogs / booties / clearance racks. She kinda stays way back away from me like I'm gonna bite or do something else weird. I holler over and tell her I'm gonna take this pair. She comes over and says "Oh my god - - your freaking me out" - - Then it's " Sorry, but I've never seen a guy actually buy anything from the womens department" and "They warned me about guys like you" - - - !!! We talked for a bit. I had to explain that I wasn't gay, wasn't gonna show up cross dressed, Didn't plan on a sex change operation etc - - - . She did mention that I walked better in 3" heels than she ever expected, but that it still was too weird for her to get a grasp of. We taked a bit more and then I asked her a question: When was the last time you went shopping with your SO and said - - WOW, those shoe would look really hot on you - - - She had to think about that. Seems her SO wears hunting boots, work boots, and Nike's. Next question (I still had the boots on) What would look better on him if you were going out to dinner at a nice place, and off to a club later - - I pointed to the boots - - -and she came back with a " Oh yeah, " I must have spent a good 20 to 30 minutes talking with this young lady before I paid for my new boots, grabbed my grimey work boots and left. I know I will be dinner discussion material for her, and I will probably never see her again, but I have to wonder what will come of this event.

[jwhite44]

Nice job, to whatever degree it takes, in trying to educate her.

[danielp6406]

Well done heelster !

I was amazed reading her comment "They warned me about guys like you" - - - !!!"

Now she knows there are "normal" men out there who simply enjoy wearing heels.

Next time a man come into her store I'm sure she will act in a diffrerent way.

If you ever have a chance to go back to this store, go see her again.

Except this time wearing "clean" clothes with nice HH shoes or boots.

Would be very nice to see her reaction this time.

Happy heeling !

PS: When I said "clean" clothes I did not mean you were wearing "dirty" clothes.

Sorry If I cannot find the proper expression here. Maybe "stylish" or "dressy" ?

(Remember my native language is French. It's hard to find the proper words when my brain is tired )

[bladerunner]

10/10 heelster,no more to be said.

[HeelAddict99]

A revelation!

Over the recent holiday, I had a chance to check out the local wares (Nordstrom Rack, Nine West, DSW ....)

Nothing that I liked in my size (12M) - So a wasted trip you say. You would be very wrong!

At local DSW I wondered how an 11M would work, never thinking it would come close to fitting. I was already in hose/heels so no skin if I tried a couple of styles that caught my eye. Knowing that a standard 11M would be out of the question - I looked only at shoes that had elastic, laces or buckles on the instep that I could let out since my main problem is a larger instep.

Next thing I know I have multiple pairs to choose from

* A Guess mid-calf boot in black (clearance)

* A Jessica Simpson:

http://s7d2.scene7.com/is/image/DSWShoes/212763_002_ss_05?scl=25.862068965517242&qlt=70&fmt=jpeg&wid=58&hei=62&op_sharpen=1

* a retro wooden platform from Crown Vintage, also clearance

* and several similarly styled pumps - such as this version:

http://s7d2.scene7.com/is/image/DSWShoes/213133_001_ss_05?scl=25.862068965517242&qlt=70&fmt=jpeg&wid=58&hei=62&op_sharpen=1

Granted they aren't the best fitting shoe out of the box - but they fit - and they are leather and will stretch given time and wearing.

I bought the Guess and the Retro Platform.

I can always go back for the Jessica (or order from the web site)

Here's the revelation part -

I don't have to just buy the "stripper heels" anymore ...

I can shop "main stream"

I finally have a Guess heel and can wear Jessica!

And so many more as yet undiscovered!

I'll be looking, and trying-on all the time now.

I have a pair of these in black on order ...

Can't wait!

I'll let you know how I make out ....

But in the end it won't matter - since I know that styles of shoes differ and if these don't work I can just keep looking and trying-on!!!

[jwhite44]

I'm a man 13, pretty much woman's 13W is what I need to look for. I had some recent luck with a Naturalizer 12W boot. So I sort of agree that people might be able to look at one size down and find something that fits. Besides looking for shows that naturally aren't as restrictive (sandals, mules, etc), I'm sure some shoes are just little more generously sized that others of the same size. If you're a size 8 or 9, there's probably no reason to do this, since pretty much every shoe is already available to you. However, if you're a size 12 or 13, being able to look at some 11's or 12's can significantly expand the selection of shoes available to you.

[Heelster]

Sizes seem to differ between brands - that's for sure, but styles seem to affect size too. I seem to range from a womens 9 1/2 all the way to a size 11 in a 5" pump. Gotta try them on to find out.

[jay jay]

A revelation!

Over the recent holiday, I had a chance to check out the local wares (Nordstrom Rack, Nine West, DSW ....)

Nothing that I liked in my size (12M) - So a wasted trip you say. You would be very wrong!

At local DSW I wondered how an 11M would work, never thinking it would come close to fitting. I was already in hose/heels so no skin if I tried a couple of styles that caught my eye. Knowing that a standard 11M would be out of the question - I looked only at shoes that had elastic, laces or buckles on the instep that I could let out since my main problem is a larger instep.

Next thing I know I have multiple pairs to choose from

* A Guess mid-calf boot in black (clearance)

* A Jessica Simpson:

http://s7d2.scene7.com/is/image/DSWShoes/212763_002_ss_05?scl=25.862068965517242&qlt=70&fmt=jpeg&wid=58&hei=62&op_sharpen=1

* a retro wooden platform from Crown Vintage, also clearance

* and several similarly styled pumps - such as this version:

http://s7d2.scene7.com/is/image/DSWShoes/213133_001_ss_05?scl=25.862068965517242&qlt=70&fmt=jpeg&wid=58&hei=62&op_sharpen=1

Granted they aren't the best fitting shoe out of the box - but they fit - and they are leather and will stretch given time and wearing.

I bought the Guess and the Retro Platform.

I can always go back for the Jessica (or order from the web site)

Here's the revelation part -

I don't have to just buy the "stripper heels" anymore ...

I can shop "main stream"

I finally have a Guess heel and can wear Jessica!

And so many more as yet undiscovered!

I'll be looking, and trying-on all the time now.

I have a pair of these in black on order ...

Can't wait!

I'll let you know how I make out ....

But in the end it won't matter - since I know that styles of shoes differ and if these don't work I can just keep looking and trying-on!!!

I love the Victoria Secret ones, they are beautifull.

[AwayInHeels]

I really like the shoes from Victoria Secret - good luck! And thanks for the tip, I also wear a 12M and just ignore all the 11's.

[crossfire238]

I wear a 12M and have had very good luck with Payless SHoes. Now going in and finding the correct size is not very easy. However I have had excellent luck with mail order.

[heelman500]

I used to buy online but as I take a UK 9 or 10 depending on style, I now buy instore and always try them on. I just cant be bothered with the hassle of exchanging them and there are plenty of shops stocking up to size 10 nowadays. I have never had a bad reaction to trying on in store, in fact the assistants are usually very helpful with advice. Its best to be honest that you are buying for yourself. Last time I was in Brantanos, the girls said "Oh you'll like these they are so comfy, Ive got a pair I wear all the time."

[HeelAddict99]

The Victoria Secret shoes have arrived!

Need to try them on a carpeted floor, just in case - but I did try the left shoe and it fits! My right foot is a little wider, so we have to check the entire look later this week.

If I could post pictures I would be happy to show them off...

As far as PAYLESS, I to used to use them all the time, but I now find myself willing to spend the extra $$ to get a real leather shoe, instead of that vinyl stuff...

Not that I have completely stopped looking at PAYLESS -

I have this pair waiting for me to try on at a store (can't wait)

It's a 12, so I'm pretty sure they will fit.

I'm going to be looking at the material they are made with to decide if I want them...

More to come.

HA99

[legs777777]

Hi I'd just like to say I wish I had your courage to try before I buy, I still get red faced when in any shoe shops buying heels without trying, thinking all eyes are on me. As for going outside, thats still a overpowering wish that grows stronger each day.

[jwhite44]

...I still get red faced when in any shoe shops buying heels without trying, thinking all eyes are on me...

Understandable. Best way I found is to try to do as much research as possible (ideally at the online site for a bricks & mortor store you'll be going to). Then, just walk in there, and tell them what you want, ie. "the Liza pump in 9 & 9.5, black". The reality is that most of the time, the sales person isn't going to care what you're asking for. If you think they might, then asking this way could very easily seem like you're buying the shoes for your wife or SO. Buying multiple sizes is a perfectly valid excuse - you're not exactly sure what size you need for her, and/or what size will fit. That also becomes a perfect excuse to if/when you return them - "she didn't like them", "this one was the wrong size", etc.

Granted, it's a little bit of a game, but there's nothing wrong with it. If it gives you that little extra push to get out and buy a pair of shoes, then it's perfect.

Hope this helps.

[HappyinHeels]

LEGS777777, Like jwhite44 points out, doing some advance research on a store's website, will give you valuable information before going to the actual store which will smooth your first interaction with them. Where I'd would differ from jwhite44 is I'd simply tell them what specific styles and sizes you are looking for and that you are shopping for yourself. Many many women are quite attuned to their surroundings and will already guess this by the way a guy walks into store, hands in pockets or not, etc. I often look at a store's website ahead of time and peruse the offerings looking for new items, just the way the girls do, then go to the store in-person and ask for those styles and they bring you boxes of more than one style but in that size. Walk in confidently and say what you'd like to see. Go prepared by wearing knee high pantyhose which wicks away moisture and makes trying on five different shoes within two minutes a snap! Your service from the sales associates will be much more intimate when you don't BS them with a story. Think about this..if you are asked what size SHE wears and hesitate, they will know. If you say she is a size US11 but stay gazing at the shoe you so desperately want to put on your own foot then they will know. So, go through all that?? Be up front and honest. Chances are also good that the sales associate will stand very close to you which sort of shields you from the open gaze of others you may be convinced are watching. Trust me, I have been in the middle of trying on multi-strap open-toe sandals and had women come upon me and absolutely nothing happened. My bald spot had to be visible but it didn't matter. You are buying a legal product and have as much right to be there as any biological girl. Do girls have this complex about them when buying men's running shoes or basketball sneakers?? They sure don't. Go out and buy the shoes of your choice whenever the hell the want. The desire to do so will only keep growing until it drives you mad. Good luck and keep us informed when your first open purchase comes. HappyinHeels:wavey:

[wobblyheight]

Hi I'd just like to say I wish I had your courage to try before I buy, I still get red faced when in any shoe shops buying heels without trying, thinking all eyes are on me. As for going outside, thats still a overpowering wish that grows stronger each day.

LEGS777777, I've tried on heels 4 times now in UK shops and have not had a negative response yet; once politely but with slight bemusement, twice with simple courtesy and once with outright encouragement (though to be fair that was a more 'alternative' shop). Even if the next experience is poor, then 1 in 5 isn't bad. There's lots of good advice in this thread which I won't repeat, just follow the bits that feel right. However I will say that walking ('ish haha) out of a shop in 4" black patent courts and spending the rest of the evening walking along Oxford Street, then attending a concert (nice 'n dark + good for seeing over people's heads...) was an incredible experience. Good luck, hope it works out well for you.

[sendra45]

Hi I'd just like to say I wish I had your courage to try before I buy,

once you have done it once you will do it again, if you are this nervous about it the rush will be amazing and overpowering, you will be busting to do it again, before long you will have blown your budget on heels. shame you are not closer, two guys going in and buying heels can be fun, I did it here with another member. That was a good few years ago though.

[legs777777]

Hi thanks for your reply. And your right, the rush buying highheels is superb, such a shame I am so far away or I might take you up on your offer, buy the way, if you dont mind me saying the picture of you in your avatar is absolutly stunning, superb legs and heels, its a shame the picture is so small. Regards

[legs777777]

Great advice but not got enough courage yet to try before I buy, hopefully some day. Regards

[danielp6406]

...by the way, if you dont mind me saying the picture of you in your avatar

is absolutly stunning, superb legs and heels, its a shame the picture is so small.

Regards

FYI: Someone said something similar to sendra45 a while ago.

Now I can't wait to see if this time, his reply will be the same or not...

[UpBy5]

Understandable. Best way I found is to try to do as much research as possible (ideally at the online site for a bricks & mortor store you'll be going to). Then, just walk in there, and tell them what you want, ie. "the Liza pump in 9 & 9.5, black". The reality is that most of the time, the sales person isn't going to care what you're asking for. If you think they might, then asking this way could very easily seem like you're buying the shoes for your wife or SO. Buying multiple sizes is a perfectly valid excuse - you're not exactly sure what size you need for her, and/or what size will fit. That also becomes a perfect excuse to if/when you return them - "she didn't like them", "this one was the wrong size", etc.

Granted, it's a little bit of a game, but there's nothing wrong with it. If it gives you that little extra push to get out and buy a pair of shoes, then it's perfect.

Hope this helps.

Hey, Legs777777

What jwhite44 said is spot on. I did it recently in a local Baker's shop and everything went smoothly, both the buy and the return. I have yet to walk in just on my own account, like so many of us. Highly recommended tactic to get the ball rolling!

UpBy5