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LGTBQ? Included?


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Basic question. For the male that just likes to wear heels. Are they considered to be included in the LGBTQ definition? 
How do those that are fully embraced by those letters consider a male who just likes to wear high heels?

Came up in a discussion after the SCotUS opinion a few weeks back. 
 

Those that are going all the way with women’s clothing may be self explanatory. Although in some cases it seems experimentation and they may not consider themselves as the T part of LGBTQ yet.

Edited by TXGuy
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It seems men wearing high heels are not included in the LGTBQ definition 

All experiences I had in gay place went wrong. Never accepted. Maybe there are exceptions. 

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My wife and I discussed this point Throughout the many years of our marriage and resolved the question that shoes do not define the character of the individual wearing them by completely ignoring it. Therefore,  we enjoyed many happy years wearing heels in public together.  In fact, whenever we’ve been approached by a curious person, usually a woman,  and questioned as to my wearing heels, she took the lead and provided an appropriate response.  Unfortunately, sad to say, she passed away a few years ago and left me alone to handle these situations by myself.  I still limit my responses to those I learned from her, truthfully and without hesitation or embarrassment.  

Edited by Bubba136
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It’s just clothes.  Is a woman who wears a tuxedo to be included in LGBTQ definition?

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21 minutes ago, p1ng74 said:

It’s just clothes.  Is a woman who wears a tuxedo to be included in LGBTQ definition?

Exactly. What does that have to do with anything? Does wearing the colour pink put you on the spectrum? Or a Panama hat? Or cycling shorts? Or having a tattoo? Or wearing earrings? Or skinny jeans? That’s silly. 

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@Shyheels you may not get asked this question because you really don't wear very high heels. I've been ask several times. And it's a lot of times the persons's SO that asks. That's why @Bubba136's wife was a rare bird.

1 hour ago, Bubba136 said:

 I still limit my responses to those I learned from her, truthfully and without hesitation or embarrassment.  

And with confidence.

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So what? If someone asks me whether I am gay because I am wearing a pink shirt, it doesn’t mean that I am, only that they are stupid

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All have made the case that clothes alone do NOT define a person or their sexuality or put them IN or OUT of the ever-evolving LGBTQ community. The community to which one most aspires to belong is the one which accepts you for who you are so long as you treat others with the same basic respect decent human beings require and deserve of one another. 

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Funny this question should come up, because just a few days ago, I had a discussion with my pastor, and somehow or other, the subject came up that I am not any of those letters, though many people wrongly assume that I am. However, I am right there with them.

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JFC, I’ve been openly gay for over 20 years and it’s no easier for me to wear heels out in public then any of you.

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@Pierre1961 Being an openly gay man myself plus being a heel wearer, I have asked myself that same question many times before and I feel that many gay men struggle with fitting into certain images or clichés that are expected from others. So everything that „seems to be too feminine“  is avoided....like wearing heels. Or it is the other extreme like wearing totally exaggerated outfits (like in the drag queen scene). So I agree with you, finding other gay men being very accepting of my heels isn’t very easy. 

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While a long way from being gay, I have friends that are, including women.  And I find it interesting that, while one does not see gay males dressed as women, one definitely sees gay women dressed as and emulating males.  I have often wondered why that is.

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While I'm not gay, all I can do is postulate from years of observation.

I think some gay men might not want to look in anyway feminine because it hurts their masculine mask, while other gay men seem to embrace it.  It's why many excel in sports (Caitlyn Jenner. for example) because they think they must prove they're "real men".  It also may have something to do with their like (love) of the masculine image. 

Not all lesbians are "b_tch" with crew cuts or very short hair. Just like gay men, there are many subgroups under the lesbian banner, including the very femme women

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Thank you @tomham for this very clear explanation. As I am ( hope I am ) totally open minded on all these subway,I was feeling sort of inequity. I would have hope to find more acceptance from the gay community than the other people. 

Somehow it’s better like that. Open mind people can be found anywhere and not only in certain circles. 

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These are my observations(and, I am not gay).  It appears that within sexual categories and division and subdivision, there are a sets of behavior characteristics that, more or less, outline each category.  It appears, for instance, gay men are attracted to male characteristics and seem to be are less attracted to men that exhibit female attributes.  Then there is a subcategory of gay men that are attracted to other men that desire to dress, look and act exactly like women.  I.e:  she-males, lady Boys, etc, and all differences in between.  Same for lesbian divisions. However, it appears to be easier for females because society today seems to accept a female exhibiting male dress and behavioral habits more readily, and with less attraction, than men wearing female attire. Go figure.  Psychology goes more deeply into this further than I want to go.  Because after thinking about it, I don’t really care.  In my. Teenage years,  I used to think quit a lot about the reasons why I loved to wear “girls shoes.”  Thought tons about it.. tried to quit/stop/change without being able to.  So, about half way through my high school years, I decided to give up and stop trying.  My philosophy:  “if you don’t like it, screw you!  And, from that time onwards,  (excepting for my military service) I have worn only shoes crafted for girls.  And, I don’t intend to stop now (too old).  So, I’ll do my thing and everybody else can do theirs.   

 

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Theses last few years I have been public about my clothing choices, nails, ect., I have yet to have anyone ask if I'm gay. Closest I have come is one young lady asking me if I was transitioning, she seemed disappointed when I said no, just enjoying the outfits. That's me, in a nutshell I suppose. I wouldn't mind a little camaraderie now & then, but was quite disappointed with my google search for "cross-dresser meetup", the returns are NOT my intent at all....

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10 hours ago, chesterx said:

Theses last few years I have been public about my clothing choices, nails, ect., I have yet to have anyone ask if I'm gay. Closest I have come is one young lady asking me if I was transitioning, she seemed disappointed when I said no, just enjoying the outfits. That's me, in a nutshell I suppose. I wouldn't mind a little camaraderie now & then, but was quite disappointed with my google search for "cross-dresser meetup", the returns are NOT my intent at all....

I think this site may be unique in that regard, that is, being strictly a fashion website. I know Tech goes to a great deal of trouble to make sure we don't much get into the fetish stuff. In fact, I'm not even going to repeat the word, because there is some sort of algorithm that flags your post if you mention the word too often. It's a restriction for sure, but I think overall it has worked out to our benefit.

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If I were to categorize, then my legs are lesbians. They want to wear heels and love women.

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On 7/10/2020 at 7:36 PM, TXGuy said:

Basic question. For the male that just likes to wear heels. Are they considered to be included in the LGBTQ definition?

Basic Fact. No.

1 is a peice of clothing the other is a persons sexuality. Surprised this is even a question.

7 hours ago, dagino said:

If I were to categorize, then my legs are lesbians. They want to wear heels and love women.

THIS is hilarious! This should be on a HHPlace T-Shirt!

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