T Strap Heels With Skinny Jeans

[P08C]

Picked up these awesome pumps from DSW. I really like this outfit. I don't post often but just wanted to share a few pics. I really want to go out and about dressed like this but I keep chickening out. How do you work up the nerve to just do it! My wife, although slightly reserved about it, likes the way I look and even supports my going out in public. For some reason I just can't work up the nerve. :,(

[Bubba136]

Put on a pair of stockings, get dressed and got out to a restaurant with your wife. A mam wearing heels when in the company of a female tends to modify people's attention. I guess they focus more on the female than the guy. Believe it or not, it does help relax you and ease your mind about what others will think about the what you are wearing.

[euchrid]

Picked up these awesome pumps from DSW. I really like this outfit. I don't post often but just wanted to share a few pics. I really want to go out and about dressed like this but I keep chickening out. How do you work up the nerve to just do it! My wife, although slightly reserved about it, likes the way I look and even supports my going out in public. For some reason I just can't work up the nerve. :,(

That's a great look. Nice shoes with a retro look to them.

You should definitely get out and about in those.

I recommend you & your wife go to a rock concert together. In a large busy place like that the majority of folk won't notice and those that do will think - "cool outfit, good for him" !!!

[SleekHeels]

You need to feel good about yourself and what you're wearing, and I think you're already half way there because you said "I really like this outfit". The fact that your wife is supportive is really fantastic, and of course it's realistic that she feels "slightly reserved about it". More importantly, she's willing to overcome her reservations, which should inspire you to do the same, that would really honour and respect her support.

 

Firstly you need to establish your own inner confidence, just to feel good within yourself about wearing your heels, and respect yourself. It sounds like you're there. To step out you just have to accept that of all the people who see you, a few might respect you, a few might not, and the vast majority won't really care either way. Your own self-respect doesn't depend on what strangers think. Most negative reactions are just out of surprise and you shouldn't make them out to be any less trivial than they really are, while any positive reactions are great and you should enjoy them. Don't step out thinking "I hope nobody notices me", just step out accepting that you will be noticed and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, once you've stepped out you'll almost certainly start feeling disappointed that it feels like nobody has noticed you.

 

Personally I think your shoes are cool and they sharpen up the outfit to create a comfortable overall look. If anything, don't worry at all about the heels, but maybe iron your top and trousers, they look a bit crumpled in some of your photos and if they were a bit more crisp that'd really bring the whole look together with the heels.

[hhboots]

Picked up these awesome pumps from DSW. I really like this outfit. I don't post often but just wanted to share a few pics. I really want to go out and about dressed like this but I keep chickening out. How do you work up the nerve to just do it! My wife, although slightly reserved about it, likes the way I look and even supports my going out in public. For some reason I just can't work up the nerve. :,(

I like the look, it suits you well and I think you will do just fine in public when you are ready.  In my opinion, you are already more than half way there if, 1. your wife supports it (I recommend bringing her with you the first few times, it really does help), and 2. the fact that you are willing to post your complete pictures online in heels says a lot, too.  

 

You can also try wearing slightly longer jeans the first few times (an inch or two longer), which might help you feel more at ease to have the shoe partially hidden.

[Thighbootguy]

I like the suggestion of going to dinner with your wife but whatwver you do make sure you project confidence.  Make sure you really like the way you look before you go out.  If there is any thought that "this dosen't look right or feel right", don't go out.  When your out, don't look at your feet unless your heel get stuck in a crack or somehing like that.  Project confdence!

As for the overall look,  I'd add a blazer of coat of some kind. I considered hhboots suggestion about a little longer inseam for the pants, but I think the length is about right when your standing, however I'd prefer a fuller cuff so it isn't as tight on the ankle.  The shoes should work with/into the pants.   Don't try to hide the heels, just make them a little less obvious.  Appreciate that this advice is comming from a guy that wears stiletto thigh boot.  If you really want to show off shoes/heels, go for boots, otherwise your just wearing stylish shoes (which I think is what you have in mind).

 

TBG

[Shafted]

I like the concept of these heels with the jeans, but I would like to see the jeans a bit closer fitting to clean up the look. A for effort.

[Histiletto]

Hey! P08C,

 

Your footwear looks great! They are close to the height of most heels worn publicly and they have a casual look about them for most any public and social activities. As long as your wife is supportive, the only thing needed is your acceptance of the high heeled look you want and will be displaying. Other people will act or react as they will and you can't control that, but as long as you and your wife are together on this, there is really no problem.

 

From taking a second look, I noticed a bit of a gap (approx. = .375") between the back of your shoes and the heel of your foot. Are the shoes really that loose.  Shoe sizes vary, but a usual rule of thumb maintains that a little over an 1/8 of an inch determines a sizing unit. Have you tried on smaller sizes? I'm wondering if two sizes smaller in these shoes would be a better fit for you. Mary Janes can fit a bit looser than other pumps because of the straps holding the shoes on, but if your feet kind of flop around in the shoes or the shoes feel too roomy, they may be too big and this will cause the strap to break sooner. Then again, I've always liked my pumps to be snug, but not tight when I selected their fit.

[w6ish]

You have to breath deep and get on with it!  Its a good look.  And with a lady on your arm:  perfect.

[AZShoeNut]

Ditto what w6ish said. I think that the outfit is perfect. If I can ever get my weight down to a weight that is close to yours then I'd wear something very close to what you have. Sure, slightly closer fitting jeans might be better however what you have is certainly great and I wouldn't wait for different jeans to go out.

Google "jeans and heels" and you'll turn up hundreds of outfits similar to yours.

Best,

Larry

[Jkrenzer]

I agree. Over tight jeans is not a good look. Your look is very good. If any change I would even go a bit looser. Love the heels.

[Steve63130]

Everybody has given you great advice here; sorry I'm late to the party. But confidence is the most important thing. Exude it and you will succeed. You have a great opportunity, one that a lot of guys here don't have, because you have a supportive spouse. Go for it and be good to her! And let us know how it goes!

 

Good luck!

 

Steve

[ilikekicks]

Thats a good look for you. Take it out on the town and have fun!

 

-ILK

[mtnsofheels]

Picked up these awesome pumps from DSW. I really like this outfit. I don't post often but just wanted to share a few pics. I really want to go out and about dressed like this but I keep chickening out. How do you work up the nerve to just do it! My wife, although slightly reserved about it, likes the way I look and even supports my going out in public. For some reason I just can't work up the nerve. :,(

Greetings P08C,

I agree with the others that have stated there comments and suggestions above, this is really good advice. In addition perhaps on a weekend try a a couple of hours out just to get your "feet on the ground", a confidence booster. When I started I wore my boots out walking the dog in suburb which greatly boosted my confidence. With all the stuff which is in the media these days about Ebola and stuff in the middle East, reality is someone seeing you in heels does not compare or come close to someones radar and if it does, your comfort is, "I am enjoying myself and not hurting anyone else". In the big scheme of things what we choose to wear is only for us and most other people now just do not say anything.

I wish you much confidence and a breakthrough for your confidence, which is so accessible with having support of your wife!

[freestyle75]

 

For some reason I just can't work up the nerve.

 

Any idea on what the reason could be?

Personally, I am still quite reserved about going out in the strappy sandals that I own, although I really like them. Boots on the other hand - no problem.

Maybe that also applies to you. Have you tried different heels?

[P08C]

I don't really know the reason. I think it's the finality of being caught. I someone I know, that I would prefer didn't see me, sees me then there is no going back. They will forever know and there is no taking it back. A big part of me wants that to happen. If it does happen then I will have absolutely nothing to be afraid of anymore. Strangers laughing or making comments won't bother me as much, at least that's what I think, it's the ones that you know that seem to have the power over me. The impulsive side of me wants to just mindlessly post one of these pictures on Facebook or a social media site because hen there really is no going back and EVERYONE will know.

The type of heel really doesn't bother me. I am equally nervous about wearing more masculine boots as I am about wearing a pair of tall black strappy sandals (I would definitely take the sandals).

My wife and I are going second hand shopping tomorrow with the little one. I think I'm going to finally do it. Finally just buck up and be a man and stop letting others live my life for me. I want to live my life on my terms and nobody else's. Also, how can I tell my son someday to be himself and not care what others think if I can't practice what I preach. I want to be a good example and I think this is really the first step. My wife even tells me this and says I need some tough love, haha.

Anyways, we shall we what happens. Even though I don't post often every single one of you are a huge inspiration to me. I read the forum everyday several times a day and love seeing all the pictures and reading all the stories and hearing about all of your successes and failures. You're all such great people. JeffB's cAsual style and incorporation of skirts with his heel wearing and thigh boot guys crazy amazing outfits (and guts) are a few of the honorable mentions. Also, I am really really loving sleek heels' outfits. I'd like to work up to that someday. I especially love that awesome floral skirt and denim skirt in one of your recent posts on your thread. You're all fabulous and thank you so much

[hhboots]

I don't really know the reason. I think it's the finality of being caught. I someone I know, that I would prefer didn't see me, sees me then there is no going back. They will forever know and there is no taking it back. A big part of me wants that to happen. If it does happen then I will have absolutely nothing to be afraid of anymore. Strangers laughing or making comments won't bother me as much, ...

Oh, if that is the case, what I have done in the past is drive to a nearby town / suburb if possible and do your outing there.  It is a great confidence booster and greatly diminishes the chances of someone you know seeing you.  For my first couple of years that was pretty much the only way I would go out...

 

Remember, your mind is your own worst enemy when it comes to doing this     As a couple of others have indicated, show only confidence, smile, and just own the look, no one will see anything wrong with you, but as soon as you look timid, worried, and you're looking over your shoulder and so on, that is when people will start to notice something is not right and you get the unwanted attention.  

 

Anyway, best of luck and have fun with it.  It really is a very cool experience once you do it.

[Lime15]

You look great in my opinion and that type of style is what I generally wear when I heel out and about, which isn't that often but that's my preference.

 

Finally just buck up and be a man and stop letting others live my life for me. I want to live my life on my terms and nobody else's.

This is the exact thing I tell myself on the days I go out.  Over the past couple years I've decided that I'm going to do what I want with my life.  I have a very supportive girlfriend and pretty damn good life and I'm going to enjoy it.  Especially this past year there's been a lot of loss and BS with family and friends and that's only re-affirmed that I'm going to enjoy the, well, things I enjoy.

 

I wear skirts on occasion with my business attire but I think that simply "finishes" another type of look for a man in heels.  A clean, casual look of t-shirt and jeans with heels is just another style open to men who wish to wear heels.  In my opinion it's a look that most men can generally pull of better than most women.

 

Also, those heels are awesome.  I'm always on a lookout of classic pumps such as those but finding them in my size, US13, can be a challenge.  However sometimes I get lucky.
 

[vector]

P08C,

 

Maybe you should try baby steps.  Perhaps wearing the shoes under boot cut jeans that cover the whole shoe first.  Then as you get comfortable, you can "expand the envelope".  As Eddie Murphy said in the first 48 hours movie, "..bull$@#* attitude and experience will tide us over..."  Keep your head up and step confidently.

[JeffB]

P08C: Your apprehension is perfectly understandable, trust me, we've all been there at one time or another. Building up the confidence to wear women's shoes in public doesn't happen overnight, it takes time, but the important thing is that you won't develop that aforementioned confidence unless you go out. But, do it on YOUR terms, on YOUR timetable and when YOU feel it's right. Don't rush into things, but when you do, make sure to be calm, cool and collected. The majority of people you'll come across in your heeling travels won't care about your appearance as they're too wrapped up in their own lives and affairs to be bothered with you, but if you project fear or nervousness, that's when people pay attention as curiosity kicks in, leading them to wonder what you're up to, and why you're wearing what you're wearing. You have to present yourself as being comfortable with your appearance, people are going to notice, make no mistake about that, but if you look and feel confident, you'll be able to mitigate the level of attention you receive, and, in turn, enjoy your experience in public. Good luck to you.

[BTBAIHeels]

Put on a pair of stockings, get dressed and got out to a restaurant with your wife. A mam wearing heels when in the company of a female tends to modify people's attention. I guess they focus more on the female than the guy. Believe it or not, it does help relax you and ease your mind about what others will think about the what you are wearing.

I agree with what bubba says, do it with you wife and ask her to tell anyone that asks that she is making you for the day/night. I'm glad that she is also slightly reserved instead of not ok with it. So what I can translate that to in my almost sixteen year old brain is that she loves you no matter what happens, and she is uncomfortable but she can also become comfortable with it. You need to accept that people will always judge you and that it doesn't matter what other people think. I hope this will help you!

Regards,

BTBA

[BootBoy42]

I have just started wearing my stiletto boots out in public so I'm right there with your emotions. I started with wedges and longer thicker Levi jeans to ease myself into the environment. It first started with a few gas stations outside late at night, then worked my way going inside. Then it moved up to a busier 7-11 store then target. I'm at the point where I do mind people's interest in my choice of footwear, but in my own mind, their opinion doesn't matter to me. Rock those heels.

[aussieheels1]

i feel the same as you mate...   it's the thought of someone i know catching me in heels that worries me as well as it takes away the control that I have in who to release this information about myself to (gossip travels fast)...  but then like what most others have said, it's all in the mind and that what ever we think is probably the worst case scenario as to what will actually happen...  i have had internal conflicts about this for may years and it is something that being rational doesn't help the argument over the brain that's not willing to listen/believe.....

 

btw - great look...  that's how i like to wear my heels too...  although i like much skinnier jeans (which i wear without heels with no issues)...  but everyone have different tastes....

 

 

I don't really know the reason. I think it's the finality of being caught. I someone I know, that I would prefer didn't see me, sees me then there is no going back. They will forever know and there is no taking it back. A big part of me wants that to happen. If it does happen then I will have absolutely nothing to be afraid of anymore. Strangers laughing or making comments won't bother me as much, at least that's what I think, it's the ones that you know that seem to have the power over me. The impulsive side of me wants to just mindlessly post one of these pictures on Facebook or a social media site because hen there really is no going back and EVERYONE will know.

The type of heel really doesn't bother me. I am equally nervous about wearing more masculine boots as I am about wearing a pair of tall black strappy sandals (I would definitely take the sandals).

My wife and I are going second hand shopping tomorrow with the little one. I think I'm going to finally do it. Finally just buck up and be a man and stop letting others live my life for me. I want to live my life on my terms and nobody else's. Also, how can I tell my son someday to be himself and not care what others think if I can't practice what I preach. I want to be a good example and I think this is really the first step. My wife even tells me this and says I need some tough love, haha.

Anyways, we shall we what happens. Even though I don't post often every single one of you are a huge inspiration to me. I read the forum everyday several times a day and love seeing all the pictures and reading all the stories and hearing about all of your successes and failures. You're all such great people. JeffB's cAsual style and incorporation of skirts with his heel wearing and thigh boot guys crazy amazing outfits (and guts) are a few of the honorable mentions. Also, I am really really loving sleek heels' outfits. I'd like to work up to that someday. I especially love that awesome floral skirt and denim skirt in one of your recent posts on your thread. You're all fabulous and thank you so much