Master Resource: General Public Discussions of men in heels

[Shyheels]

Going out of one’s way to be provocative is seldom a good idea

[Cali]

I have some damaged nails so I have acrylic nails and I wear fingernail polish, yes it's a little provocative. I have many choices how I can do it, from simple stuff that chips to full out over the top nails. I chose over-the-top nails. That way I get envy and not condemnation. By the number of woman and men that give me positive comments on my nails, I know I'm doing it right.

I think of my colored nails as changeable nail art whereas tattoos are not easily changed.

[p1ng74]

I like that.  If I’m going to wear something controversial, it is best to wear it well, wear it deliberately, and wear it boldly....

[MackyHeels]

3 hours ago, p1ng74 said:

@MackyHeels while we might agree on being sensitive to what women are thinking, we don't seem to agree on our approach to this sensitivity.  Envy and jealousy are powerful emotions.  On the positive side, jealousy can be inspiring.  Yes, I get jealous of how much fun some people have when I see pictures and read their heeling accounts, and I think I have been inspired to try new things.  I know people around notice what I am doing, and I hope we have a positive interaction, so that we can all be inspired to enjoy different things.  But in order to keep things positive, we have to be sensitive and know when to slow down.  If your outfits are intended to stoke envy in such a way that it body shames other women, it will likely lead to many negative interactions with them.  And this danger is not just with women's clothes - I have specifically seen a situation where a man crossed this line at work with a masculine outfit.  

You haven't seen angry woman only because what we are wearing doesn't suit her particular taste. Yet we have the right to wear what we want but they stand against it no matter what we say or wear, slowed down as you put it. My experiences have taught me, as many here on forum repeatedly wrote, don't care what others might think, just continue wearing what you enjoy. Yes, the consequences can be steep depending on your intentions towards others.  

Often talking to few older mature ladies with euro background tell me repeatedly they are so envious and jealous observing my style, taste, and body wearing feminine outfits in the gym. In a good smiling way, giving me thumbs up often and compliments making me blush. Some tell me being so inspired knowing they can observe me from a distance, knowing i will continue to visit the gym daily wearing my sexy feminine outfits, thus helping there lack of motivation to exercise.

While other married younger females tell me for some odd reason they feel in competition about the clothes they see me wearing in the gym. They tell me they hated me at first, angry, because i better them wearing my outfits. Since they started to purchase my brand of feminine outfits they become happier inclusive of me, chatting me up, complimenting that i look better in these feminine outfits then they.  Even seriously encourage me to purchase same bright colour outfits, laughing asking me to wear it on the same days as they visit the gym. Some woman who kept their distance for years never speaking to me, now can't stop giving me compliments, noticing my cologne, outfits, physique, even gossiping about overhearing other woman talk about me privately to others in a positive light unbeknownst to me.

Although sometimes i slightly regret it,  regarding to stoke envy, going too far for some innocent young woman trying to better her body. They get frustrated at there results not achieving a goal  (there fault not mine), while feeling depressed looking upon there old worn, pilled, basic black, gym clothes compared to my new refreshing impeccable outfits seen on a daily basis. 

Observing recently some young attractive lean blonde asian woman copying my leggings style. Purchasing the same brand, colour, style, leggings walking into the gym feeling  self conscious seeing me around, modeling her pretty self in gym floor mirrors, staring upon her backside and flattened bootie, feeling deflated, avoiding me. Probably asking herself why she can't look as good as "that guy" (me) accompanied by her paranoid boyfriend. Often seeing the troubled meek females wanting opportunity to chat with me pick my brain about diet, exercises, clothing, or closely examine me  subtly while working out nearby, nothing wrong with that.  Although always the jealous asian boyfriends notices stares her down jumping  to get in between us, forcing her to move away, telling her she has no business doing exercises uses this or that nearby.  Telling to move another piece of equipment so happens to be other side of the gym, seen this phenomenon many times different asian young woman twin sisters and friends.. Shaking my head why these young males are so defensive upon my presence, looking out for their girlfriends not getting to close, watching over me like a guard dog. While times the boyfriend is not in eyesight watching over his girl if circumstances are ideal i may exercise next to her observing her in the corner of my eye. Telling that she observes every movement of me sitting on the gym bench

Yet i continue to parade around in the gym floor, pool, whirlpool  flaunting my body in feminine leggings, tight tech tops, thongs overhearing woman discussing what they think in positive lustful manner or observing there stare walking behind me. 

 

Edited December 16, 2018 by MackyHeels

[nzfreestyler]

I think most fashion conscious women are fashionistas - they wear what they do more for themselves and other women who are also fashionistas - primarily not to lure men or to fuel envy in other women - but because they like to look good in their own eyes. Naturally they swim in circles of like minded women. And in the larger fish tank - well we have a lot of women who don't get into that because they have never tried, just knock the fashionable ones back because it easier to be critical than to make an effort yourself.And as for the guys - well most don't notice the effort, those that do still don't get the styles, and a very small percentage of guys can probably appreciate it.

I don't think its about stoking an envy - in my experiences women know I am not trying to outdo them. I actually do try to outdo them as I like to have the best legs, or the nicest outfit if I can but I appreciate being beaten and it makes me try harder

I appreciate the fashion and the style of clothes and shoes - and if women sense that I do - then they get it - a fellow fashionista - not a enemy. Hard to explain quickly but that's what its like for me.

Edited December 16, 2018 by nzfreestyler

[MackyHeels]

1 hour ago, nzfreestyler said:

I think most fashion conscious women are fashionistas - they wear hat they do more for themselves and other women who are also fashionistas - primarily not to lure men or to fuel envy in other women - but because they like to look good in their own eyes. Naturally the swim in circles of like minded women. And in the larger fish tank - well we have a lot of women who don't get into that because they have never tried, just knock the fashuonable ones back because it easier to be critical than to make an effort yourself.

I don't think its about stoking an envy - in my experiences women know I am not trying to outdo them. I actually do try to outdo them as I like to have the best legs, or the nicest outfit if I can but I appreciate being beaten and it makes me try harder

I appreciate the fashion and the style of clothes and shoes - and if women sense that I do = then they get it - a fellow fashionista - not a enemy. Hard to explain quickly but thats what its like for me.

Nzfreestyler You hit bang on! 

Take example of women that go to horse racing events at the track. Not the daily races but the special events like the Kentucky derby look at the hat wearing woman in pink, cream coloured outfits and court stiletto heels. These woman put lot of effort dressing much more formal than any wedding party just watching horses run around a grass, dirt track.

Take your point most woman outfit themselves for her not  deliberately for others only to get rise out of them, yet undoubtedly some do it anyway. You wrote Nzfrrestyler that you appreciate being beaten so it only makes you try harder next time. Guess that is the trap we all fall into unless you didn't put effort in your outfit in the first place, then just instincts tell you to sharpen up or  feel awkward wearing same thing next time. Countless woman feel that way feeling OMG i need to go shopping look at the room i'm in with all these ladies in new trendy outfits.

 Sometimes stokin envy becomes  class warfare. Usually if not always, the one wearing expensive designer rags and shoes wins even if the body is worn and tired displaying such attire it becomes a winner nonetheless. Queen of UK comes to mind.

There is distinction of fashionista trendy conscious fashion woman all to consumed what they are wearing needing to purchase unique rags to make the outfit work. Usually these ladies are very competitive and deep down very evil, egocentric, selfish. not wanting others to look the same as them. Trumps wife comes to mind. 

Maybe i'm legging fashionista and some percentage of women sense it quietly respecting my taste, style and choice of colour as if taking credit designing leggings myself. Sometimes i can sense and assume woman wearing new leggings want my reaction because what they seen me wear in the gym boldly no male would dream of or have the guts. If i look shocked stunned they figure they did something right, me being envious, jealous beaten to the punch. If i totally ignore don't recognize there outfit or stare longer upon them with a usual confused sneer as what are you wearing that for reaction, they figure shamed to buy a new outfit. 

My motivation is know your audience and dress according to get a reaction. Yes i need to pass few personal rules of my own before i wear it in public does it compliment my body or am i wearing it for the sake of any reaction. Yet being observant of many females in the gym keeping close eye on them versus me wearing different colours styles. Often i make assumptions what these females love hate, when wearing specific outfits. Some woman like bright cheerful colours telling me so, all while disparaging others looking like crap in dull, effervescent colours with muted pastel tones. While others enjoy the subtle conservative style and colours not wanting attention yet still looking unique. Very tight rope to walk on but wearing certain things makes others envious jealous while other days laugh disliking the range of choices i choose to wear on any given day.

Just once or twice a year i may hit the mark hitting home run wearing complete outfit almost anyone will have to admit envies. The expression on woman faces upon me is worth the effort and purchases needed to get me outfitted so well.  the overjoyed feeling that i found an new outfit that clicks for everyone looking is remarkable thing. Yet i know these feelings from others will pass tiring of the outfit in days following. Yet the road continues to be traveled looking for the next big thing. 

 

Edited December 16, 2018 by MackyHeels

[p1ng74]

The last time I was in a fitness facility was in high school.  Based on all of Macky’s experiences I will continue to stay away   That is way too much drama just to get some exercise.  I’ll stick to my private routine and maybe go on a run in my boots...

[Shyheels]

I go to quite a rough looking gym in an industrial estate, with an eclectic mix of people - about half look like Hell’s Angels, with shaved heads, tattoos, beards, huge muscles and big bellies. There’s very fit women kick boxers, some elderly couples, a couple of young mothers, old hippies, and a muscly middle aged somebody (gender unknown) who generally wears pink tights and occasionally sports some PVC. And guess what? Nobody gives a damn. Everybody gets in well together and does their thing. I’ve never heard a single cross word there. All friendly and relaxed. 

[mlroseplant]

3 hours ago, p1ng74 said:

The last time I was in a fitness facility was in high school.  Based on all of Macky’s experiences I will continue to stay away   That is way too much drama just to get some exercise.  I’ll stick to my private routine and maybe go on a run in my boots...

HA! I'm with you there. I was a member of the YMCA for a while, mainly because they had a pool, and I thought I might like to try triathlon at the time. Made some pretty good progress, but a change of job and 60-70 hour workweeks put a stop to that in a hurry. 

Nowadays, it's just me doing yoga by myself on the kitchen floor at 4:30 in the morning before I go to work, and I like it that way. I hate other people watching me struggle. Plus, the kitchen floor hasn't stayed this clean in years!

By the way, I wear boring black cotton leggings and a t-shirt, albeit a close-fitting one so that it doesn't flop in my face during inversions. I often do (upright) balancing poses in heels 'cause it's fun, and also helps heeling in the real world. Don't think I'd do that at the gym...

[HappyinHeels]

Being around other sweaty people in a gym was never for me. I substituted weightlifting in the gym for swimming in our school's Olympic-sized pool. The school was built in 1973 and included various things not found in most central Pennsylvania schools. When I travel I will often take advantage of those often empty hotel pools. They are usually small but some swimming is better than none at all. HinH

[Shyheels]

I always enjoyed the gym, although my favourite exercise of all is being out and about on my bicycle. I love that. I never ride to get fit though, just for the sheer fun of it. I end up going many miles though, so fitness happens.

[p1ng74]

7 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

I often do (upright) balancing poses in heels 'cause it's fun, and also helps heeling in the real world. Don't think I'd do that at the gym...

Yes!  I like doing certain exercises and stretches in heels.  I like doing a sitting to standing routine with no hands, in heels to test the strength and sturdiness of the whole leg, foot, and shoe combination.  I figure if I can pass this, then I am ok to go out in the heels!

[p1ng74]

Since we are on the topic of exercising in heels, this might be inspiring...

[Shyheels]

Not something you see every day - in any sense! 

 

[HappyinHeels]

Her approach to the three-point line, rotation, and release tell me she has played before. Perhaps a sports journalism student?? That skirt is very nice as well. HinH

[p1ng74]

Kim Adams.   Clearly heels and skirt do not hinder true athleticism...

[Shyheels]

The name is not familiar to me, but clearly she knows her way around a basketball court. 

Mind you, I have seen some f the dancers on Strictly Come Dancing (I think it has a different name in the US) doing some extremely athletic dancing in four-inch stilettos, with unbelievable grace and seeming ease 

Edited December 17, 2018 by Shyheels

[MackyHeels]

Very attractive Fashion conscious woman gave me a real long stare Down one time. As I walked in my skinny jeans and sneakers. Her expression told me everything I needed to know about her perceptions for guys like us. Yet walking passed her couldn’t help observe her sandal heels and long legs, very beautiful. 

Here’s a link

https://amp.courier-journal.com/amp/29562851

Perfect example of a woman that doesn’t appreciate a male styling in feminine fashions no matter how great in shape he’s in. 

 

Edited December 17, 2018 by MackyHeels

[p1ng74]

17 minutes ago, MackyHeels said:

Perfect example of a woman that doesn’t appreciate a male styling in feminine fashions no matter how great in shape he’s in. 

 

How do you know?  I can’t tell based on the interview...

[Pierre1961]

Right. Me neither. 

[MackyHeels]

1 hour ago, p1ng74 said:

How do you know?  I can’t tell based on the interview...

Through experience not first time the "stare" from like minded beauty contestants given me, eyeballs bulging, mouth open in shock appalled disbelief as i kept walking the floor confidently approaching closer to her . Her eyes never looked away at least 15 seconds, more i noticed her focused stare upon my legs, she kept looking down upon my shoes at first i thought she recognized my designer nubuck black generic sneakers. At the time i had bigger smile amused at her disbelief stare down even had thoughts come to mind, she should see me in the gym with my tighter outfits....Although from her distance she couldn't possibly see the brand logo stamped on the back of the heel or doubt be impressed by the generic style. So i gather it was my female J-brand, photo ready, 620's, nightbird wash that had her full attention.

Could be she owns same pair or recognizes them. Yet i believe an attractive beauty contestant, fashionista is often scoping out how others are dressed then being appalled at a male like me wearing dark feminine  legging jeans in public so confident walking in them. Positive she feels how on earth does he think it looks good on a man with painted on tight jeans, looks like a girl. Have few gals that won't say hello if i wear anything like that funny that i passed by one at the same time making my way by being observed by the beauty queen. The common denominator of all these woman is there all fashion conscious "fashionistas" so they recognize what i have on even voice out the brand i'm wearing to others.

Knowing she likes wearing dark coloured exclusively sandal strap stilettos at least four inches.  She like me have same idea, wearing that with my said jeans maybe next time i bump into her we may talk fashion asking me what brand of jeans i was wearing. Like her taste the jeans would look better in heels, only if we ran into each other at a mall in my heel booties what the reactions would be.

Just example how fashionistas have one side talking in respects to female gender while never imagining a male might style similarly. Thus her response of shock disbelief which often comes that my fashion sense is all to wrong for my gender. She may even try to help me understanding men don't wear clothes woman wear.

Edited December 17, 2018 by MackyHeels

[p1ng74]

@MackyHeels I assume you don’t know the lady that you linked as a “perfect example”, so perhaps our of respect for her let us not come to any conclusions about people we don’t know.  

Edited December 17, 2018 by p1ng74

[MackyHeels]

1 hour ago, p1ng74 said:

@MackyHeels I assume you don’t know the lady that you linked as a “perfect example”, so perhaps our of respect her let us not come to any conclusions about people we don’t know.  

Believe P1ng74  very positive at my instincts, have very similar infatuated woman i known for years exactly like the one i wrote linked about. She may have noticed the stare from the beauty contestant upon me, as i was walking. Even my infatuated lady hater would nod to the beauty queen thinking the same mindset,  i know exactly what your thinking, i see him wearing these type of jeans all the time, disgusting that's why i ignore him entirely. Observing  the beauty queens demeanour about me is telling if something disturbs her. Difficult to approach her in friendly manner without being thought as someone that has ulterior motives. Yet not impossible to chat with her but you usually get superficial political correct answers.

Maybe i'm painted these woman with the same wide brush but experience taught me just from visual que's upon me they have issues of my style. Heard others voice out so i could clearly hear in polite manner " he has issues". Sort of pointing out my fashion sense is wrong and continuing to be wearing it in public is more then fashion mistake but psychological one. Nice way telling me indirectly that i'm certified crazy.

Yes, i try not to assume what others maybe thinking about my fashion sense. Although do have example of another beauty contestant Capital city from Florida. She is very outspoken little less PC as we made eye contact. She definitely noticed my rags i was wearing. Although at the time my jeans weren't super tight as the other woman seen. She gave me pleasant smile and nod looking me over. Without a doubt i sensed she liked my feminine outfit yet didn't faze her like the others. Which tells me she is cool with whatever fashions i may wear heels, skinny jeans, because it's not her business to judge disliking others because what they are wearing. So 3 out 4 attractive woman i had interactions with hate my fashion style while other just doesn't care or judge. 

Ask myself why only clues i can conclude is the other three woman observing me shocked have slender lean attractive model bodies. Assume they believe in themselves not being self conscious about showing their body. While the positive minded outspoken beauty contestant may have larger shapely physique as the years have gone she isn't as slender compared to the others yet just as attractive.  Sometimes woman who are considered overweight or large often are marginalized in the beauty competitions. Thus understanding other marginalized people being more sensitive to there feeling rather staring making obvious judgement what they dislike. While the leaner beauty pageant gals don't worry about how people perceive them because they fall into a physical lean category that is medial normal range for that title. Often fashionistas with slender builds never perceive judgements about their body seeing everything they wear can't make there hips, thighs. to big or judged being to large.  Thus can't understand others being marginalized in society for there appearance. Only they perpetuate it more needing not to apologize for them being genetically skinny while laughing at the overweight cow saying lots of luck competing with me.

So when i get judged negatively by few beauty contestants i examine there lean untoned bodies. Doubting very much they can stand proudly next to fitness competition models in a bikini without feeling utterly self conscious. This make me amused they judge me but i can throw it back at  them and scan there body with judgement and smirk them fully understanding my demeanour. Voicing out loud to colleague, she ain't that hot, compared to gals in my gym, she need to do few more squats and situps, ass out stomach in to fill out that dress. Point made!

Edited December 17, 2018 by MackyHeels

[p1ng74]

1 hour ago, MackyHeels said:

Maybe i'm painted these woman with the same wide brush but experience taught me just from visual que's upon me they have issues of my style. Heard others voice out so i could clearly hear in polite manner " he has issues". Sort of pointing out my fashion sense is wrong and continuing to be wearing it in public is more then fashion mistake but psychological one. Nice way telling me indirectly that i'm certified crazy.

With the topic here being men in heels, if public perception of us is limited to being painted with a wide brush then we are in trouble.  And quite possibly that wide brush will be that we are all crazy.  While we might start our interpersonal relationships with instincts, it is in our best interest to progress beyond them.  Otherwise, any complaint about our lack of acceptance is hypocritical.   

[HappyinHeels]

MackyHeels,

I  think p1ng74 is neither pointing out your fashion sense is wrong nor is he certifying you are crazy indirectly or directly. Fashion sense is highly subjective and its beauty or not is in the eye of the beholder. P1ng74 is neither trained professionally to render a diagnosis for you nor does his pattern of thoughtful posts tell me he is about to declare you crazy. Perhaps if you posted what YOU wore and not that of women you saw on the street or in print media we could have a better dialogue. We are interested in what you wear and the positive aspects you experienced. We are not interested in 600-word diatribes about soap opera-like actions and reactions. I feel like reading your posts is reliving a scene from "the Matrix". Macky appears in skinny jeans and heels and the stares descend upon him like lasers in slow motion. My best advice:  Be concise. Be positive. Post pictures of yourself.  It's no more complicated than that. I would like for you to get more from your outings than a knot of stares and gasps or whatever it is. Untangle your interactions with the world and you'll be able to relax. Can you relax? That may be the first question. I'd like for you to get more from this website rather than making it a dumpsite for your negativity. Confidence starts with love of self before the first step outside can be confidently taken. HinH  

[KneeBooted]

21 hours ago, MackyHeels said:

Very attractive Fashion conscious woman gave me a real long stare Down one time. As I walked in my skinny jeans and sneakers. Her expression told me everything I needed to know about her perceptions for guys like us. Yet walking passed her couldn’t help observe her sandal heels and long legs, very beautiful. 

Here’s a link

https://amp.courier-journal.com/amp/29562851

Perfect example of a woman that doesn’t appreciate a male styling in feminine fashions no matter how great in shape he’s in. 

 

Now I cannot say that I personally know her, but this is my hometown... would you like me to go ask her what her thoughts are regarding men in women’s attire?

I did not get any negative vibes from the interview questions either, so I am confused.

[HellHeels]

Hi everyone, just found this site and am extremely excited to be around like-minded people.

Long story short, my gf at the time who is my wife now was pretty cool with me and heels in our early 20s, but I pushed it too far and let it take over our sex life and cared more about the heels than her. Eventually I got rid of them to show her that they aren't important for our sex life and I meant it. But recently I've been having temptations to just wear them again, and it's been at least 5 year since I wore any. So I bit the bullet and bought a pair of booties last week, I wear them when she isn't around the house and it feels great. Now in my head, I'm trying to find a way to bring it up to her, since I don't like hiding things. I'm trying to say something like "this is just for me, it doesn't have to exist in our sex life, I don't need them to have fun with you etc etc"... But I'm still sitting on it. 

I actually do want to take some pictures and share with you guys though. I feel very liberated in doing so.

Pleased to meet you all.

[HappyinHeels]

HellHeels,

Welcome to our site. Normally I look for new members in the "Hellos, Goodbyes, Introductions" section on the home page. Post something there about when you first liked heels and where you live with a bit more context. Yes, post a photo of what you bought in the "Who has bought new boots" section as well. We like photos. HinH

[HellHeels]

2 minutes ago, HappyinHeels said:

HellHeels,

Welcome to our site. Normally I look for new members in the "Hellos, Goodbyes, Introductions" section on the home page. Post something there about when you first liked heels and where you live with a bit more context. Yes, post a photo of what you bought in the "Who has bought new boots" section as well. We like photos. HinH

Will do!

[RonC]

On 12/18/2018 at 12:30 AM, HappyinHeels said:

MackyHeels,

I  think p1ng74 is neither pointing out your fashion sense is wrong nor is he certifying you are crazy indirectly or directly. Fashion sense is highly subjective and its beauty or not is in the eye of the beholder. P1ng74 is neither trained professionally to render a diagnosis for you nor does his pattern of thoughtful posts tell me he is about to declare you crazy. Perhaps if you posted what YOU wore and not that of women you saw on the street or in print media we could have a better dialogue. We are interested in what you wear and the positive aspects you experienced. We are not interested in 600-word diatribes about soap opera-like actions and reactions. I feel like reading your posts is reliving a scene from "the Matrix". Macky appears in skinny jeans and heels and the stares descend upon him like lasers in slow motion. My best advice:  Be concise. Be positive. Post pictures of yourself.  It's no more complicated than that. I would like for you to get more from your outings than a knot of stares and gasps or whatever it is. Untangle your interactions with the world and you'll be able to relax. Can you relax? That may be the first question. I'd like for you to get more from this website rather than making it a dumpsite for your negativity. Confidence starts with love of self before the first step outside can be confidently taken. HinH  

HinH, I personally have given up reading his posts.  Generally very negative, and quite honestly, they are rarely about heels, rather focusing on yoga duds or some such thing.  They don't really apply to the focus of HHPlace in my opinion.