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First may I say that Gige's quick progression amazes me, he has accomplished more in about a year than I have in ten years. And, like you both have said, making progress is a "vicious cycle" indeed. My Mom used to tell me: "you are your own worst enemy...." I think many of us are under the impression (false one) that the rest of the world is waiting outside our door for us to venture out in heels so they can point, laugh, criticize. While it is true people will notice, but no where to the extent we fear they will. Most are too busy to notice our footwear. And for the most part, those that notice will say nothing (another double edge sword for me anyway). I guess we make the false assumption that most others will notice our heels quickly only because we notice the shoes others are wearing. On the other hand, stumbling around in tall heels we can't handle will get us noticed. As Cali put it, you "have to read the room". Venturing out in a short skirt and fishnets will probably get you noticed also. Having negative experiences like this can be a big set back. This is why it is best to start with heels that are somewhat modest. We are nervous enough venturing out in the beginning, so this just increases the chances of stumbling or tripping, which why it is important to start out in heels that are not hard to walk in. Once comfortable/confident walking in modest heels publicly, then we can start to increase heel size and consider some slimmer heels. The only other idea I have is to venture out with a girl or guy pal that is supportive. "Confidence in numbers". I'm always looking for "heel buds" to hang out with. I would be lying if I claimed I never get nervous when out in public these days, but it is infrequent for sure.

Early morning outfit

Here are my new boots, Light brown suede leather

Several interesting events happen this week. On Wednesday I stopped at the Post Office on the way into work. As I past a woman getting to her door she stopped and told "I just love those boots" (Impo boots with 3.8+" skinny heels) "I wish I could walk as well as you in them." That's just normal for me. It's what happen on the way out that makes this an event. When I was about 11 meters from my car, I felt something wrong...looked down and the platform had separated from the top of the shoe. Got to my car, took off the boot and drove home. Lucky, I was only 4 miles from home. Went home and changed into my Jessica Simpson faux suede knee highs. I have since glued the shoe together. I wonder how many miles I have logged in those shoes over the last 6 + years; 50?, 100?, 200? Today, was a meetings day, again had the JS knee highs (rainy/windy day). After one meeting, a woman told me she always likes walking behind me because she likes the heels I wear. We discussed shoes for a few minutes, she and another woman were fans of JS shoes. Sheepishly she confessed that she owned over 50 heels, I told her "that's ALL, I have around 100." We laughed.

Here is the outfit from 2 weeks ago, and yes it was f'ing cold !

I've been browsing this site for a long time. But after my most recent escapade I knew I'd have to share. I want to make a post detailing my history a bit as I've found other smiliar stories and experiences informative. In the meantime though I will share my boldest public outing. So the plan was simple go out in the early AM in flats. Walk to a remote area change into heels, walk around a bit. Change back, walk home. Easy. My biggest problem though is what pair of heels? I bought some bright pink mary Jane's with a slight chunky heel and a nice t bar strap. About 3 and 3/4 of an inch tall. I only intended to wear them at home because they were so blatantly feminine and bright. But they fit well and I can walk in them comfortably, they also can be walked in without being incredible loud. That is if you walk with good technique. I figured that I wouldn't even see anybody and for some reason I picked them for my walk. So I got dressed. Threw a hoodie on slipped into some old ratty sneakers grabbed my heels and head out the door. This was nerve-wracking. But I tried my best to bolster my confidence. Why would I a man be walking holding a pair of bright pink heels? Maybe my GF left them at my house and I'm dropping them off, who knows. These are the mind games I play so I don't feel so awkward about the whole thing. As I walked I ended up at a small stair set. I sat down and took off my sneakers. I slipped my heels on. I took a couple steps and they sound alright and I can walk alright. However I began hearing voices coming closer and closer. I panicked. I frantically tore my heels off and just in the nick of time I was able to get my sneakers back on and as they rounded the corner I began to walk away. At this point my mission felt fubar. For some reason there was a relatively high amount of activity for that time of night. I began to feel discouraged. I also grew paranoid that it was some kind of security and they'd follow me. Thankfully I kept walking and they didn't. I wanted to call it quits but I couldn't turn back and possibly run into whoever that was, so I kept marching forward. Again I saw a man perhaps leaving a late shift or arriving for one. Again the activity scared me. But I doubled down and kept walking. I had now made it to a large parking lot and I knew that there would be nobody there. So I found a big set of stairs sat down and put my heels on. I left my sneakers sitting there and begin to walk. If I walked either heel to toe or tried to land my foot evenly my heels weren't too loud on the concrete. I felt my confidence begin to return. I felt comfortable walking and with my jeans partly covering my feet I felt reasonable safe. So in a spur of the moment decision I decided to go back for my sneakers, but not to change back. I picked up my old sneakers and found the nearest trash can and tossed them. Now I couldn't chicken out. I'd have to walk the mile back home in heels. Well unless I wanted to do the walk of shame and walk barefooted on the wet ground. I felt relatively confident, I knew the area well and I could navigate the quiet darker places and I'd only have to risk one section on the way home. So things went smoothly, well besides the fact my feet already hurt and I was was only a quarter of the way. I couldn't change my mind now! So I was beginning to reach the tricky portion of my walk. I knew that this was a sort of choke point between two sections of town and I would be more likely to see somone there. Surprise surprise as I was thinking this I rounded the corner and a young man was walking right my way about 20 feet ahead. I had no time to panic or hide. I just kept walking. I even instinctively made eye contact and nodded but they just stared straight ahead and kept walking. I was a hooded dude in jeans and pink heels I wonder if he even noticed haha. Either way I survived and the rest of the walk was uneventful. My worst case scenario happened and it was fine. So that was my little adventure. I have more to share in the future. If any of yall got questions id love to hear them. Thanks for reading. Also I've never been very good at writing so hopefully I conveyed this story decently enough and any grammatical stuff wasn't too egregious. -Goose

When I repainted my first place I wore my tallest heels trim the edge where the wall and ceiling meet. A step stool might have been more comfortable, but this was more fun.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

Well it happened again. Another convert. Last night, a women waiting for a colleague asked me how high my boots where. She had seen me in several boots and decided to get some herself. I had my Jessica Simpson black faux suede knee highs with a 1 inch platform and 4.75 inch heel. I had plan on wearing my JS suede stilettos, but it was a drizzling all day, so as the memo states, you "don't wear suede in the rain." She had been looking at boots on-line and figure if I could wear boots with high heels, then she could too. Another high heel convert!!!

Nervous and fear 12-15 years ago. Now, I don’t give a f**k I can count on 1 hand how many negative comments I have heard in all my years. to Pebblesf point, other people are so wrapped up in there phones and staring straight ahead they don’t even notice. When someone makes eye contact DO NOT LOOK AWAY OR DOWN. Look straight back at them with a nod or a hello. I have engaged in heel and or outfit conversations as well as conversations that have nothing to do with the heels skirt or dress I am wearing. I will say from experience that 6” stilettos fishnets and a leather miniskirt will get you noticed and it certainly has gotten me noticed. I am headed to the Tampa airport and back to Chicago in about an hour and I am wearing a brown sweater dress and patchwork/color block brown and black stiletto knee high boots. you only live once and I waited to late in life to dress the way I always wanted to. I’m not hear for a long time I’m hear for a good time

This outfit seemed to call for boots.

I had an interesting shoe wise day. I had 1.5 hours free in the afternoon today so I went to a large mall near work. First stop was the large Women's Macy's with a very large shoe department, saw nothing of real interest. Then over to an Aldo, nothing; then to the Steve Madden store. While I was looking over what they had, the manager told me he "could only last 3 hours at most in heels like yours." We chatted for a few minutes and I moved on. I looked at Norstrom's shoes, again nothing of interest. Walking back thru the mall, a young couple walk up to me and the guy said "i really like you heels." (I bet one day soon he will try a pair on.) Last stop was at Forever 21, I was looking for a small chain for a Halloween costume, but they didn't have it either. Exiting the store a young girl was filling out a job application, looked up and said "I just had to stop you and tell you how much I love your heels." Today I had a pair of Flexx straight leg jeans with over calf boots. So only a bit of the heel showed. It has been months since I had this much interest in my foot wear, especially in less than an hour and a half.

I bought yet another pair of Steve Madden pumps, model Daisie. I bought them because they were purple. Only once I got them, they were only purple-ish. I don't know what color you would call this, but I wore them for the first time today, with pink and salmon attire. I don't really have anything purple to wear with these shoes. As you can see from the picture, they are tall, but not super tall, coming in at 4 3/8". The heels are super skinny, though.

Here are my latest. I got these in a thrift store for less than twenty dollars in mint condition. Gray ankle boots and the brand is Sam and Libby, and they really look great with the 3 buckle detailing on the side. These probably won't take long to get used as I already have an outfit planned for them.

Probably to most likely...yes! I apologize as this post will either make me look indecisive or like a politician trying to backtrack on earlier comments. A few situations have occurred, however, that are worth exploring and has me reconsidering my previous positions on topics covered in this forum. I think it was in mid-July when I was at SLAM (St. Louis Art Museum) wondering one of the exhibition halls when I encountered a young woman wearing a black sweater, a midi length black and white patterned skirt, and a pair of black, 4" "funky" heeled boots. I casually approached her and as I always do, explained that I did not mean to be forward, rude, or aggressive, but simply wanted to let her know that her outfit was beautiful and as a boot lover, I greatly appreciated her wearing such high heeled boots, especially on a summer day in St. Louis. In short, she explained that the boots were Vince Camuto and were supremely comfortable to the point that she frequently wore them to her office. We spoke for a few minutes about wearing heels before heading in our separate directions. Next, a few weeks ago, I had to physically go to a branch of my bank to conduct some business that I could not complete online. I was dressed rather "mildly" in that I was wearing blue, just above the ankle jeans, blue vans, and some top - nothing fancy and rather casual. The banker with whom I met that Saturday was wearing an incredible outfit the likes of which have not left my mind. The woman was probably in her early 50's and had a very lean figure proportional to her height. Her outfit, however, was insanely gorgeous. She was wearing a black or very dark blue, long sleeve-mid thigh dress which buttoned all-the-way down the front. The sleeve cuffs, collar, the tops of the pockets on the mid chest area were white - it fit her like a glove. Her footwear was a pair of either creme or very light beige over-the-knee boots with a ~3" heel. When she asked me how she could be of assistance, I responded to the effect of that the first order of business was to make it known that her overall outfit was "stunning!" My actual banking business took no more than three minutes but as there were no other customers in the waiting area, we spoke for about 15 minutes about her boots, brands of footwear we like (e.g. Jessica SImpson, Steve Madden, and Vince Camuto) and where we shop. All the way home, some 90 miles, I could not stop thinking of that outfit. I had come to the conclusion that if she (and the woman from the first encounter at SLAM) could and do wear such beautiful outfits, why can't I do the same? Then, today on a much needed break following a horribly stupid morning, I read a short article about "appropropriate" heels for work/office. The writer (a woman) noted that, as has been mentioned here (ad nauseum, I am sure) what is appropriate footwear/heel height for a professional environment is truly up to the wearer of such to decide. She (the author) noted that, generally speaking, 3-3.5" is usually "the limit" of heel height for professional settings but again, the idea of what is "appropriate" may be a confluence of multiple factors such as personal tastes, company policy, etc. The writer seemingly cautioned against wearing heels higher than 3.5" because of issue of practicality, lack of grace when walking, and other similar concerns. All of this started me thinking about what heels do I actually wear to work and what heels do I WANT to wear to work. I have a few pairs of the "Taken" model boots from Giaro I purchased via Shoebidoo in Utrecht, Netherlands. They feature a 12.5cm/5" block heel and I have always wanted to wear them out somewhere. I have worn my black pair out once albeit to a drag show, so they really fit the mood of the event. Despite the tall heel, they are easy in which to walk and they give me a sensation unlike that of any of my other heels. I began thinking of ways I could possibly wear them out or to work. I have some concerns about wearing them to work only because my employer likes to write utterly ambiguous employee policy so that management has absolute discretion in enforcing as it sees fit. Likewise, as I have a knack for pointing out gaping holes in company policy, much to the chagrin of my bosses, wearing an item that even remotely approaches the realm of "inappropriate" will potentially cause problems for me. This is why I have yet to wear a mini-skirt to the office although I absolutely have the legs for it! Then I thought, what if a cover my boots? I have a pair of long, wide legs pants that are perfect and would only expose the very bottom of the heel and toe. I personally do not care if anyone sees them as the sensation of wearing something that tall is strictly for me. So, the question is, based on the photograph, would you do it? The photo with the skirt is just to show what the boots look like but the one with the black pants is an actual outfit I might wear. I have several pair of 4"+ boots/heels that I am now reconsidering wear to work when the bosses are not around, such as the friday before long/holiday weekends. I am really inspired by the banker with whom I spoke because until now, wearing over-the-knee boots in a professional seemed so taboo and verboten, especially if one was over 25 years old.

My elder son got married on Thursday. It was a very small wedding. I would estimate the total number of guests at around 30, and about half of those were parents/grandparents. I was the only one in the whole bunch wearing heels except for my ex-wife, who has always been a big fan of heels. To be fair, I don't believe I've ever seen her wear a pair of "high" heels in her life, but she was often in mid-heels when we were married. Thursday she wore tan suede pointy-toed pumps with a three inch block heel. The only other exception was the cellist in the string quartet they hired to provide the music. The cellist had on black patent pumps with a three inch stiletto heel. We'll take what we can get. For the record, I was wearing my black Aldo oxfords with 4 1/4" slim heels. Almost stiletto, but I can't honestly call them stilettos among enthusiasts.

Stuart Whitzman Mary James with a 4” thicker heel. They are comfortable out and about

This is so true! I remember the first few times I wore heels in public. I was so focused on what people might say, or what types of looks I might get, that by the end of it, I was like “wow, no one really even looked, or seemed to care at all, one way or the other”. Psychologically, I think I prepared myself too much, for negative reactions, ridicule, or even dirty looks, and when none of that happened, I realized that the whole event really wasn’t as big of a deal to everyone else, as it may have been to me. It honestly felt like all of the mental preparation and courage I summoned leading up to my finally walking in public wearing heels, was a gigantic nothing burger! In a strange way, It was sort of a let-down, almost making me feel like all of the excitement I had been building up in my own head, along with the thought that others would be ready to laugh, ridicule, point, or whatever, gave the whole thing much more importance than it actually deserved. What I got from my first experiences wearing heels in public, is that most people either, don’t care, or are not paying attention (mainly because they are probably too wrapped up in their own routines and their own distractions). I truly believe more guys would venture out in heels, if they realized that 99.8 of the “barriers” and negative reactions they expect and prepare for, or that they imagine that actually prevents them from experiencing and exploring wearing heels in public, basically come mainly from their own thoughts, and not the public/society itself. As far as reactions go, over decades of wearing heels in public, I’ve gotten maybe three or four dirty looks, maybe double that amount of looks of confusion or “double takes” (like when someone sees something, looks away, then quickly looks back, as if to say, “did I really just see what I thought I saw?), and I should add that many of those were woman, who followed it up with a kind smile! As far as comments, I’ve gotten literally dozens, from males and females alike, mostly all positive! Definitely nothing that would have ever kept me from going back out in heels again, that’s for sure. Bottom line is that most people could care less, and the ones that may notice, are mostly kindhearted people, and not as judgmental as one may think.

Between 85 and 100% of what I wear comes from the woman's side, but other than my heels, I don't look feminine. Even with gel fingernails. More colors and fabrics to play with, better fit.

I hear ya for sure. But, I have found/noticed that a mix of subtle "feminine gear" along with decent "masculine gear" can be a great look indeed. Just a guy, happy to be a guy, wearing a touch of "feminine gear". I find this to be a very confident/powerful look indeed. Needless to say, many guys have nice long/lean/toned builds and look great in even more feminine gear, not a look I can pull off for sure... I recently bought a few pairs of women's nike leggings/work out gear pants from a thrift store, just to get a better idea of what size would work for me, and just how I would look. I enjoy wearing them, but afraid to see an actual picture of me...Afraid I might be "overstepping", writing checks my old dad bod just cant cash!

After four days in a row of practice, I believe I am back to normal. The super cold weather has left us, at least for now, and I can stand to walk outside again. It may be that I will feel like taking some pictures again soon. It's kind of too bad I missed the last couple of weeks. I wore knee high boots to church two weeks in a row!

I realize that I do not need to share the excruciating details of my everyday life on this forum, but I had an encounter this evening that made me wonder if, while out in a pair of heels, we do not notice others who may notice us? A bit of a backfill is needed. My employer mandates that all employees have to exhausted certain types of Acquired Benefit Time (i.e. personal days and/or vacation days) by the end of the calendar year or lose it. As Christmas and New Year's Day fall on Wednesdays this year, about 99% of the staff take extra days off throughout December. I am, unfortunately, that one percent that still has to make my way into the office. As we approached the end of 2024, my bosses began sending emails to their staff indicating on what days they would/would not be in the office over the last two weeks of December. Given that I was the only poor soul who was not taking any time off over the holidays, I decided to make the most of all others being away by designating the last two weeks of the year as "High-high heel days." I decided that I was going to wear those 4+" heels into the office with some outfit that, until very recently, I would never have otherwise considered doing so. I very much wanted to make sure that I was comfortable doing so now so that I could do so again in the future. This past Tuesday, for example, I wore an exquisite knee-length leather skirt with my 4.5" Jessica Simpson - Tulip (model) boots. Today I wore a delicious animal print, just above the knee skirt with 4" wedge boots and a black turtleneck. As a whole, the ensemble was quite haute couture if I do say so myself. After the end of the workday, I headed over to the local wine bar in town as the place has a Friday after work special. After sharing a drink with a friend and colleague from another department that is the monstrosity of my employer, I decided to engage in my favorite, least desirable activity - weekly grocery shopping. FWIW, my colleague raved about my outfit and I told that if she continued, she was going to make me blush, which was not that hard as I was already wearing a nice rose colored blush! As I made my way into the hair care products aisle, I encountered two younger aged women, who I would place in their early 20s. I took notice of one of them because she was wearing very casual, just over-the-knee, 2.5" block, black microfiber heel boots, with distressed jeans. I grabbed some hair conditioner and made my way to the end of the aisle where I encountered the two women. The woman wearing the boots then says to me words along the line of "I love your outfit - you look fabulous!!" "Oh, thank you ever so kindly!!" was my response, which is my standard response and I truly do mean it. The same woman told me that she loved the skirt and I find that making small talk when given a compliment has been received is a means by which to show sincere appreciation of such. I told the women that, in fact, I found it at the local second-hand store, and was amazed to find an item so cute and in my size. Seeing that it fit me so well, I "had" to buy it for the few dollars marked on the price tag. The woman continued to compliment my outfit and then told me that as soon as she noticed me turning into the aisle, she was "checkin' me out." I told her that I honestly did not notice her doing so and again, thanked them both for their kind and encouraging words before heading to the next aisle. In all, I would estimate that I was in the presence of the woman for ~15-20 seconds before she made any compliment to me. Needless to say, it is encounters such as this that I truly enjoy and reinforce my confidence. The fact that I did not notice the woman looking at my outfit made me wonder if, after a certain point of routinely being out in heels, do we drop our guard and not even realize it? Do/can "we" become so confident that over time, we no longer notice who notices us? I suppose one could argue that it is a defence mechanism for any of us to focus on what we are doing when out and about in a pair of heels so that we do not notice others reaction to our presence, if they actually should have one. There have been may posts on this forum regarding whether or not others actually notice "US" when were are out and about while wearing heels. I would venture a guess that the consensus is that no, many others do not notice us when we are wearing our heels and if they do, they care little about such. So, I have to ask if we become like "them" and after a while, take no notice of those who notice us? I can certainly say that I have reached the point where when I am out in heels, I do not notice what anyone's reactions may be as doing what I need to get done is the focus. Thus, if someone should notice me, my reaction is..."And?" The wedges were supremely comfortable but as I had been in them for 12 hours when I finally got home, although my feet and calves were not screaming "uncle" they were tired. I think @Tech will be awarding me "Best Dressed of 2024" any day now!

Well, I guess I feel that not as many folks notice our heels and boots are we once might have feared did notice! Again, I always notice footwear, so mistakenly made the assumption that most others do too. But, on the other hand, I feel that more folks notice than we are aware of. Most folks might notice but don't want to be rude or stare, and they are way too busy to deviate from their immediate missions while out and about. I might not notice folks checking out my boots intentionally, mainly because I want to give them the opportunity to look (hopefully admire) without "being caught looking/staring" by me. Generally, I can usually sense when someone is taking a second look though. For me, I know I am relaxed when out and about, when I almost forget I'm wearing boots.

Like you, I do have stilettos that I wear while working, so yes, I suppose they’re technically work boots - my favourite being a pair of lovely black suede OTK boots with 4” heels by Jean Gaborit

Undoubtedly having some supportive and, better still a high heel aficionado who can offer useful tips, hints and critique as well as enthusiasm would be wonderful. And a bit of a unicorn, I’m afraid. My heels, the ones I wear regularly, tend to be modest ones - 3 to 3.5 inch chunky heels in ankle, knee and OTK boots. I’m not so concerned about my ability to walk well in them, at that height and chunky heels to boot, it’s not hard, but would welcome fashion advice about what to wear with my boots - what style/shade of jeans, or style/colour of jumper, coat or shirt, with which pair of boots. I’m never confident of being well put together - and there is virtually no fashion advice columns for men who aspire to wear tall feminine-style boots

Got my first pair of Fernando Berlin boots

About 5 years ago I had a (much) younger woman thank me for wearing heels. She loved heels but had succumb to peer pressure and stop wearing them. Seeing me in heels everyday gave her confidence to again wear her heels. And she was happier. Yes, she liked sitletto pumps.

I have evidently missed my HHP anniversary, but not by much. Evidently, I've been on this site for 12 years! I wonder how this would have all gone without this site. I had already made up my mind that I was going to wear the shoes I liked about six months before I joined here. I'm sure that my fashion life would have been different, but I'm not really sure how. I guess it's been good to know that I'm not the only one, but I've been used to that my entire life, so I don't know that it would have been a deal breaker. One thing I have noticed is that for my anniversary, I no longer have the option to choose a different font than this default sans serif font that I'm not particularly fond of.

First off, I apologize for asking a question that I am sure has been discussed ad nauseum in specific threads or in response to other postings. My intention is simply to try and gather input from ALL male members of this forum, not just the half-dozen or so regulars whose responses, opinions, and discussions I have come to find very enlightening, highly value, respect, and admire. Allow me to ask the question and then explain why I am doing so. For those who wear heels into work, what is the highest heel height you have worn and if you do so on a regular/routine basis, what is the average heel height you wear? Lately, due to comments and opinions offered across many postings on this forum, as well as my recent public observations and interactions with others, I have been seriously rethinking my approach to wearing heels in public, all in a good way. I hold no doubt that my approach to wearing heels in public/to the office has been that of a very conservative style. By this, I felt heels should be no higher than 3” – 3.5” (~7.5cm – 9cm), no stilettos, and if worn with a skirt, the hemline should not be higher than just above the knee. Truth be told, all of this has started to “fall by the wayside” as my approach to wearing higher heels and shorter hemlines in public/at the office is radically transforming at an accelerated pace. I have been thinking of recent encounters I have had with women wearing either over-the-knee or tall stiletto boots with short hemlines of their skirt or dress. I was recently at Logan Airport (Boston) and observed a “middle-aged” woman who was “rockin’ out” a shorter (just above the knee) black leather pencil skirt but yet, it seemed appropriate for an office environment. As I strolled through Boston along the “Freedom Trail” I observed many women wearing at or above the knee boots with shorter skirts. This made me realize I am so very removed from any sense of contemporary fashion where I reside and I truly have no concept as to current heel/boot fashion or trends. Thus, that which I once thought was “taboo” in terms of office attire is completely misplaced because I do not know what is being worn elsewhere. A frequent contributor to this forum previously noted that he possessed more shoes/boots than he could possibly wear. This led me to consider my own wardrobe which, in turn, made me consider the question of, if I have heels that are “too high” to be comfortably worn out in public, why, then, do I even have them? I am no longer content in having “only at home” heels and have considered the question of, if I have heels that I realistically will not wear out-and-about for whatever reason, then why have them at all? As a result, I have currently "sidelined" a few pairs until I can figure out what to do with them. I am currently considering purchasing a pair of 9.5m/3.75” heeled leather boots and in time, a pair of thigh-high leather boots with a 2.5” heel. I have concluded that if each of these pairs of boots are worn “correctly,” then what would prevent me from wearing them in to the office, or even grocery shopping? I realize such may be subject to employer policy/restrictions, but if there is no expressly worded prohibition of heel height or hemline (within reason) then why in the heck not do it? Yes, I realize that if I am comfortable doing so, then that is all that matters, but again, provided that it is all within employer attire policy. Some of what I have observed about what others believe is appropriate office attire, such as distressed jeans with more missing material than actual material holding them together, leaves me shaking my head in disbelief. I do not know if I will ever be comfortable wearing stilettos of any height out-and-about as I think the heel would eventually break, but as I have 4” wedge heel boots, why should I rock those out with a leather skirt somewhere? I think much of this transformation is the direct result of no longer giving a d*** who sees me wearing heels/boots/skirt and what s/he may think of it. I think it is fair to state that if I feel comfortable in what I am wearing, them I have no problem in having others see me doing so. Truthfully, my head is now spinning!

I do not mean to be the center of attention here or dominate this discussion board but lately, that which I have been experiencing has led me to become super confident in wearing heels out and about. I came to this forum many years ago so wanting to wear heels out in public but never believed that I would ever walk out of my residence doing so. Now, I cannot imagine leaving my place not wearing a pair of heels, even if it is to run my garbage to the dumpster, a distance of ~250ft. I was so very inspired by so many posts on this forum to take those steps to accept who I am - a guy to loves to wear heels, and “allow” myself to be seen while wearing them. I looked at many pictures here and was envious of individuals like @CAT because he dressed in the style (and yes, he has it!) I always wanted to do but never thought would be possible. Now, I have outfits the scream style, elegance, and professionalism. And I say this with all the humor in the world, but I hope I am giving him a run for his money! 😍 Over a year’s time, I have gone from being so frightened of being seen in heels to a point where I want the world to see me “en femme,” and I really do not care what others think about it. If someone has an issue of me wearing heels or even flats with a skirt in public, then that is their problem, not mine. I have told those close to me about this – my family, friends, colleagues, and most importantly, my beloved wife of 32 years as of 10/31 (Yes, I was married on Halloween and this year we will be celebrating it in Salem, Massachusetts). I have come to ask the question of, if those who are important to me know about my love of wearing heels and accept it, then from whom and what am I hiding? I am reminded of the line from Dr. Seuss, “Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind” How very true. I chose the name “Gigi” based on a few factors. I am a huge hockey fan and some time ago, there was a gentleman from New Brunswick, Canada, named Ghislaine Hebert who was (and I think still is) a referee in the NHL. My wife and I loved that named and agreed that if we ever had a daughter (we are childless by choice) we would name her Ghislaine. I have also always loved the name Genevive and thus, Ghislaine Genevive, or “Gige” was “born.” Gige, however, is not who I am and masks my true identity. That being the case, I want to properly introduce myself to all as I no longer want to hide who and what I am! My real name is Richard and I live just outside of Springfield, Illinois, the state capital; I am a fraud investigator by profession. As some of you know or have deduced, I am originally from Chicago and have a love/hate relationship with that city. I have seen a few other transgender males around my part of the world but they are often much younger than me. I do not approach them as based on solid advice from @mlroseplant, it is probably best not to do so for a multitude of reasons. If, however, someone should approach me and want to talk about or compliment my outfit, I will always make time for them. As much as I love wearing heels, I also love talking about them. If, to the contrary, someone wants to criticize my outfit, then I will be happy to let them know that it takes more courage to be a man wearing heels in public than critiquing those who do. That being the case, if anyone is my neck of the woods or heading up/into Chicago and wants to talk heels somewhere (no strings attached, no obligations, no attempts to “pick-up” anyone – I’m married after all!) let me know as I would be happy to do so. I end with this thought from a meme I saw somewhere…What do you call a man who wears high heels? Answer – a person who want to be happy! Thanks so much to everyone for your stories and inspiration. I could not have ever walked out in public in a pair of heels without them! Photo - another day of catching those trying to "scam the system."

Thank you to all for the wonderful responses - I truly appreciate the support and kind words! As I have made known in several previous responses to other threads, had I not found this forum and read the stories of other men venturing out in heels for the first time, I do not know that I would have ever found the courage to do so myself. Given how far I have come in just about a year, it seems somewhat foolish that I did not do so earlier in my life. As I was driving home from the office in a ridiculously cute outfit I wore today, I was thinking that it is almost a year to the day when I first wore heels (boots, actually) to the office. Although ~95% of the shaft and heel were covered by long pants, I was still so nervous about doing so, and that someone would "see" my footwear and take note of what I was wearing. Then, after my work day was done, I headed out for a quick haircut and as I was waiting in the salon/barbershop, store, I was so nervous my hands were sweating. When my name was called, it was a "here goes nothing...!" moment. I was not ready to have anyone see me wearing heels at that time but, admittedly, it was a thrill knowing that I was "secretly" doing so. Now, a year later, I could not possibly care less what anyone may think as so many people, at the office and in public settings have seen me in heels, that it has become routine. I do not consider myself to be "Superman" or the like when comes to wearing heels out in public but I realize that if someone has an issue with it, oh well...not my problem. I truly do not know why I have so quickly overcome my fears of wearing heels in public. I think that once the first few times were "under my belt," so to speak, it just became easier and easier to do. Not to sound like a broken record but the words of Dr. Seuss have truly taken on a new meaning for me..."Those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind." Well, enough of my rambling...Thanks again to everyone! Richard Photo - the aforementioned "ridiculously cute" outfit for work today!

November's entries - I think I wore the orange turtleneck outfit to work...definitely wore the red/maroon dress to the office!

Got a couple of pictures this week. One is the church OOTW, featuring a gray color palette, which may be an oxymoron. The second is Casual Saturday, when I decided to wear my new boots, which are rather on the chunky side.

I have come to start embracing this approach. My job is a "hybrid" meaning that I can work from either home or at the office as need dictates. Right now, I do a 2-3 schedule in that I am at home on Mondays & Fridays, and at the office Tuesdays - Thursday. I find that at home, I am more inclined to "throw on whatever" and go with it rather than take any time to put together a nice outfit - it's all done in laziness. My wife has long been a proponent of the "dress for work," even at home" because it does much to promote a professional mindset. She has, understandably complained about those who show up to video meetings in bathrobes. I could not agree with you more - live up to your footwear is my approach to every outfit I put together. That which I wear MUST coordinate with my footwear or else it just will not work for me.

As we all know, there is a “first time” for all events in life that are certainly worth remembering for one reason or another. Over this past Halloween, I had one such event that covered two firsts for me – traveling in heels and being “out and about” in heels with my wife, both of which were delightful. This is just a short recap of both as I believe that they are worth celebrating and/or remembering. On the day before Halloween, I was to meet my wife in Boston for a long weekend to celebrate our wedding anniversary and tour a city that, despite our worldly travels over the years, we had not yet visited. I was to depart from St. Louis while she was to depart from Amsterdam and we would meet each other at Logan Airport in Boston. For this leg of the journey, I sported a simple Anne Klein - 3” heel, black ankle boot. Admittedly, I was feeling a few nerves as I entered the terminal as I reasoned that this was the most crowded place to date in which I wore heels. Regardless, all went smoothly from entry to departure. As the flight neared Boston, I noticed that I was starting to become a bit anxious because of the fact that when my wife would actually see me, it would be the first time she would do so in “real-life,” not just from a picture. Thus, I was unsure if her reaction would be different or not. Nonetheless, we were happy to be reunited and headed to our hotel. There, I eventually changed into jeans and my trainers as we headed out to dinner. The next day (Halloween) we spent walking parts of Boston’s 2.5 mile long Freedom Trail and I am glad I did so in my trainers! For the evening, we headed to Salem, Massachusetts (site of the infamous witch trials in the late 17th century) but as we were heading there via public transportation, we both decided to start the trek in our trainers and change footwear while en route. I had selected my 4” Giaro, pointed-toe, black wedge boots as the choice for the event. Just before arrival at the town's train station, I switched footwear and then we headed out to join the festive environment that it was (think Mardi Gras). After our celebratory dinner, we strolled the town’s streets and as we stopped to speak with a local craft vender, a young Asian woman noticed me. Although I do not remember her specific words, they were along the lines of “You’re a fashion icon” and insisted that I pose for a picture with her. Not a problem as I am always happy to do so. About an hour later, however, the boots had to come off not because of my feet hurting but due to the fact that my thighs and calves were aching from the afternoon walk around Boston and walking in heels was not doing them any favors. Friday did not see me in boots/heels at all and Saturday, I was wearing flat heeled, black microfiber just over-the-knee boots as we visited a friend for dinner outside of Boston. As Saturday’s boots were flat, I will not go into details of those, although the outfit was rather attractive! Sunday morning saw us visiting one last historical sight and a final shopping excursion before heading to the airport for our flight to St. Louis. The plan was to spend the morning activities in my trainers and then switch into a pair of Naturalizer, black leather, 2.5” knee high boots for the trip back to my part of the world. Unfortunately, we arrived back at our hotel later that expected and due to some “issues” of another pushy tour group, departed for the airport a bit later than we hoped. So, once we arrived at Logan Airport, I quickly changed into my boots and made our way to the gate. The “problem” with the boots I was wearing was that this was their initial outing and they were rather tight, especially the left foot. I have a great leather softening spray I use (purchased on Amazon) to help with the breaking in process but as I left this back at my place, I just had to deal with it. I decided to see if walking around the airport would help loosen them up a bit, so I took a stroll around to other gates and as I did so, a young woman with body piercing just about everywhere possible commented that my outfit was “sensational!” I profusely thanked her for comments and headed back towards my departure gate, taking the long way back so that I could “strut my stuff” and everyone in the terminal could see me – boy did that feel great! Overall, the new boots were not “too” bad but by the time I actually was enroute back to my place, the left boot had to come off as it was very much pushing against my swollen foot. As I write this, I have sprayed the boot with the leather softener and I am wearing it with multiple pairs of thick socks to help stretch it out a bit. At St. Louis - In Salem (MA - no "real" witches found!) At Logan (Boston) Airport

I have two things to report. Number One, I talked with a college friend of mine and told her that I was wearing my giant Prada mules for my morning constitutional on account of the fact that it was raining. I know I shouldn't abuse such expensive shoes in this way, but hey, they keep my feet out of the puddles. I didn't pay anywhere near the grand that this brand normally goes for brand new. For one thing, they're slightly damaged, and that was before I started using them for rain shoes. This particular friend is not in my true inner circle, so she said the usual "I want to see pictures, or it didn't happen." Number Two, the other picture you see here is my church OOTW. I got my new pants to go with my new shoes. This is one of the few times, maybe the ONLY time I've ever worn the same pair of shoes to church two weeks in a row. To refresh present recollection, they are Steve Madden Daisie pumps in mauve. They're just a tad under 4 1/2", which puts them more in the 11 cm range, but hey, I can walk in them!

Which reminds me that Whitby (on coast of North Yorkshire, for those unfamiliar) is known for its 'Goth' atmosphere, mainly due to the Dracula legend. And there are Goth weekend events on 1 - 3 November, doubtless following-in from Halloween. Even when these events are not on, Whitby is a popular place for people in Goth clothing, which will surely include some extreme heeled footwear, with long points, buckles etc.

Here I am with another church OOTW. The only notable thing here is my new shoes is the color, which I cannot define. The camera actually captured the color fairly accurately, it's a sort of purple, but it's not really purple. Anyway, like most of my Steve Madden pumps, I can wear these things just fine. They're not really all that high, coming in at 4 3/8 inches.

Earlier today I had an encounter with a woman in heeled boots that was so unexpected and amazing that I felt the need to regale all members of such. So, if you are interested in reading about it, then continue on but if not….well, too bad. Today was the quintessential autumn day in central Illinois as the high temperature was ever so slightly above normal. It was brilliantly sunny with not a single cloud in the sky and at this latitude, it is the peak of Autumn colors. Given such, it was not a day to spend indoors in any capacity and it was my desire to be outdoors that led to an inspiring encounter that will be long remembered. The dialog of the conversation is presented as the best as I remember it. After completing a few errands in the morning, I returned home to drop off my purchases and have a light lunch. The day was simply too beautiful not to enjoy the autumn colors and thus, I decided to head to the Lincoln Memorial Gardens located on the east side of town. The Memorial Gardens is a 125 acre large nature preserve and probably the best place to stroll along marked trails on this marvelous day; the entrance is about a 20 minute drive from residence. En route, I came upon a non-descript intersection controlled by a traffic light and as I had the green, I approached without much caution. There is a small petrol station on the northeast corner of such and as I neared it, I could not believe what I observed – a woman wearing five-inch, black stiletto knee high boots stepping out of her vehicle. As soon as I saw her, I thought to myself, “Did I just see that?!” I immediately turned into the gas station and pulled my car to the pump behind and on the other side of her car. I could easily see that yes, she WAS wearing the boots I thought she was wearing! Although I could have used a bit of petrol, I was not going to purchase it there as the station only offered the lowest octane regular or diesel. Sorry, but neither one of those are going to work for me. Upon stepping out of my car, I reached for the window washing brush and cleaned up the rear window (it was actually rather dirty) and then grabbed a few paper towels the clean the edges and wipe away the streaking. As I went to place the paper towels in the trash, I cautiously approached her. “Excuse me, ma’am” I stated. She looked at me and then I said, “Those are killer boots!” A bright smile came across her face and she responded, “Oh, Thank you!!” I then professed that her boots were those which I would love to have in my closet. As she seemed to be delighted with the compliments, I asked her about the brand she was wearing. She leaned against her car and raised her left foot so that the sole and heel were facing upwards. I could see that the boots fit her calves like a glove. “I don’t remember where I got them…Oh, they’re Nine West. So it’s a decent brand” she stated. “Yes, Nine West has great designs – I have a few pairs in my wardrobe” I replied. “I do not mean to be forward” I continued, “but you look sensational! Are you attending an event?" I asked. The woman, probably in her mid-40s, and an “average” physique, was wearing a black dress with a hemline that hit about mid thigh, with a slightly below the waist length black jacket. She had long, straight brunette hair coming to about her mid-back, and a tongue, nose, and just below the lower lip piercings. Based on her appearance, I though she may be heading to a Halloween party. Her outfit is hardly that worn around my part of the world. “I just left a funeral” she replied. Talk about awkward – complimenting a woman on what she is wearing to a funeral… “Oh, I am sorry to hear that” was the best I could do. “Regardless, your outfit is stunning” I said. “I don’t mean to be rude by complimenting you, but your outfit is incredible!” I continued. I do not remember her exact response, but she mentioned that she loved the compliments and never tires of hearing such when directed her way. Not wanting to make her feel that I was wanting to do more than simply express my appreciation for what she was wearing, I started moving back towards my car. “Have a wonderful afternoon” I said. “Thank you darling! You’re beautiful!” she said as got back into my vehicle. From there, I left the premises with someone needing to pour cold water on me! As I drove to my destination, my mind was racing. Wearing five inch stiletto boots in a funeral? That is extreme confidence in my eyes and has so inspired me to step up “my game.” During my lovely stroll around the Gardens, I made a vow to do something that I have wanted to do for years. I will reveal such, however, when it comes to fruition. The picture of the boots were not the exact model she was wearing, but were fairly close. When I should pass away, I want those in attendance at my funeral to wear the same outfit.

I, like CAT, do not have the opportunity to wear heels at work, as it would not be advisable or even desirable. However, just for the record, there was a time when I thought I would never wear stilettos, either. I'm going to make a prediction that it will only be a matter of time before you're comfortable with stilettos.

I wear heels to work almost everyday (maybe not once a year). I like 3.5 to 4.25 inch rise for my hip. I had a pair of lace up Sodas today with a 4.3 inch heel and .7 inch platform. I don't wear skirts (except at Halloween) but I do wear stilettos, both in booties and knee highs form. But then I might also wear my pleather pants with knee high boots (like I did to a busness party this pass weekend).

I am convinced that I am probably the only narrowboat dweller who even owns a pair of heels - no big surprise I suppose given how life is lived along the canals, the easy bohemian style of most boaters, and how little space there is aboard a narrowboat for anything non essential. My boot collection takes up an inordinate amount of space. I wear heels all the time indoors but walking along towpaths is an impossibility and wearing heels around locks would be dangerous in the extreme. I am known though for always wearing nice knee boots - low heels - everywhere so that’s something. I’m the only one though

I totally agree with you, at about 12 cm, it's the classic look. Higher than that, it so much depends upon the design of the heel. There are some 15 cm heels that I absolutely adore, and there are others that look just plain odd, and I am unable to qualify exactly what makes something "odd." Unfortunately, I can't walk in any of them. I think a reasonable goal is to be able to walk in the 12 cm someday. And by 12 cm, what I mean is probably about 13 cm in my size.

Couple of things to report on the young women's fashion front. Number One, when asked (or ordered) to dress up, high school girls still often wear heels. They may not be to my exact liking, but they're better than the alternative. I witnessed this when I went to drop off my son for his All State Band audition. Number Two, which is related to Number One, our neighbor down the street just posted her daughter's senior photos on social media. Nothing really remarkable about them except for one thing: Her choice of footwear. I haven't seen anything like this on a teenager in at least ten years. I cropped out most of the picture for privacy and discretion reasons. To tell you the truth, until this social media post, I didn't know my neighbor had a senior in high school. Unlike my kid, all of her kids are very standoffish with adults. I only know the twins that are in my son's class (sophomore). This, of course, begs the question, "Are these for real, or just for a photo shoot?" The answer to which I will probably never know, and really don't care.

Right which makes the he manager a heels wearer if he knows he'd only last 3 hrs. I wouldn't have resisted the temptation to discuss why only 3 hrs with him. Running into fellow male heel wearers while wearing your own is uncommon, putting it mildly, even if at that moment he wasn't wearing heels. Great day, I get multiple good comments days from time to time and it is fun

Sounds like you’re getting some very positive feedback. I did have one question - and it may just be a matter of a typo. You wrote that while st Steve Madden the manager said HE could manage only three hours in heels like yours. Is that correct? If so that’s kind of intriguing

I have yet to see a dog wearing heels that high.

Thank you ever so kindly! Thank you ever so kindly! I may not have the elegance of such wordsmiths as Ray Bradbury or the like, but I do enjoy writing essays when I get the chance. First off - a huge thank you to all who responded! Your comments, thoughts, and critiques are always greatly appreciated. It always seems to be the case that I wake long before my morning alarm and begin mulling the most important question of the day, "What the heck am I wearing to the office?" Most times that which I wear is largely dependent on how my feet feel - somedays certain shoes are just not going to work for me. So, when I find a pair that do, I will put together an outfit around those that will work. After I rolled my old bones out of my cozy bed this morning, I quickly checked to see if there were any responses to this thread. Upon reading those that had been posted and the encouragement within them, I decided that today was going to be the day I took my style of dress to a new level. I recently purchased a pair of beige-ish just-over-the-knee boots and decided the time to wear them out and about had come. I matched them with a khaki knee length skirt, brown sweater, halloween themed accessories, and off I went. Admittedly, I was a bit unsure of the outfit as the boots, in particular, were outside of my comfort zone in terms of what I usually wear to the office. After reading the first responses to this thread, however, I recognized that if those who commented on this topic can wear stilettos, OTK boots, etc. to work, so can I. As I got to the main entrance of my building, I held the door for a woman who has a bad knee and has trouble walking up the three stairs from the parking lot to the level of that entrance. "Good morning!" I said to her as I see her often and always hold the door for her, to which she replied, "Good Morning beautiful! Love those boots!" What a way to start the day! I told her that this was the first wearing of them so they were a bit tight around the toe box, which they were, but loosened up a bit by the end of the day. Over the course of the work day, many colleagues observed what I was wearing, even my "big boss." It was honestly a thrill to be seen in this outfit and a tremendous confidence builder. I was dancing on "Cloud 10" at the end of the day as my outfit had passed muster for being acceptable. Then again, compared to what others wear in my office on my days, I could waltz in in a bathrobe and still look more put together than many of them. I will admit that I felt incredibly alluring. I left the office today knowing that OTK boots and slightly above the knee skirts can be worn while still retaining a high degree of professionalism. It is my intent to push the boundaries just a bit to incorporate a bit of pizzazz into my outfits when I can. The heels and hemlines will be slightly higher, and clothes and accessories will have a bit more "spice" to them. All within reason of course. So, to those who have already been down this road, my sincerest thanks for setting out a trail for me and others to follow. It is my intent that when I am next in St. Louis, to go back to my bank and personally thank that banker for inspiring me to follow suit. Eye catching/head turning outfits can be professional. Thus, the answer is yes, I was wrong!

Brand new pumps from Giaro. They are 7.5 inches high including the platform and walking in them is absolutely no issue whatsoever. I got them from Hot Heels Shop Poland. I did a video walking in them as well, and you can hear my knees snap 3 minutes in just from kneeling.

So, I thought an update may be necessary. Probably not though.... I have been giving much thought to this topic and have fielded and read a few words of well spoken advice. Thus, I have arrived at the conclusion that heel height is not always that important. I have come to believe, in fact, that what is important is not so much what is worn but how it is worn. I would argue that one can appear equally as elegant in flats as a pair of 5"/12cm heels. Take today's outfit for example. I was wearing a maroon turtleneck, khaki dress pants, and brown Miz Mooz (brand) 3.5" heeled oxfords. The colors matched perfectly and I accented the outfit with a warm colored short scarf, 15mm rose gold hoop earrings, and a brown belt. Overall, I thought the outfit was gorgeous and reflected a sense of elevated style - simple but well matched pieces. Compare this to the previous day's outfit which consisted of a black/grey/white color block long sleeve shirt, a knee length black skirt (BTW - my first time wearing a skirt to the office!) and a wonderful pair of almond toe, black knee high harness boots with a 1" heel. Again, simple but well coordinated pieces. Although the two outfits were very different in tone and appearance, they both displayed a sophisticated and professional style. I felt equally comfortable in both. Tomorrow evening I am attending a small reception for the opening of an art exhibit for which I will be wearing a black/white sweater, black pants, and black leather loafers, along with a black Spanish Beret (made in Spain but found and purchased in Ghent last April). Once again, simple and elegant. I suppose the point to all of this is that, although heels are wonderful and I will continue to wear them as often as possible, one does not always need to wear the highest heel possible in order to display a sense of style, class, and elegance should that be the desired look. One can have great style in very low heels (e.g. kitten heels) or even flats provided that the outfit with which they are worn is of the same caliber. To me, I believe classic styling of shoe/boot and outfit has always spoke loudly about a person as much as current trends; classic styling will never go out of style as far as I am concerned. Thus, low heels can be just as alluring as a 5"/12cm stiletto; black kitten heel pumps/slingbacks will always be supremely elegant regardless of how tastes and styles change or fade. If I had to provide an example of such, I would say look no further than Kate Middleton (or Jackie Kennedy) as she can make flip-flops or house slippers elegant. So, in essence, the height of the heel is not as important when compared to how it is worn. Flat is not necessarily boring and very high is not necessarily "trashy."