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Several interesting events happen this week. On Wednesday I stopped at the Post Office on the way into work. As I past a woman getting to her door she stopped and told "I just love those boots" (Impo boots with 3.8+" skinny heels) "I wish I could walk as well as you in them." That's just normal for me. It's what happen on the way out that makes this an event. When I was about 11 meters from my car, I felt something wrong...looked down and the platform had separated from the top of the shoe. Got to my car, took off the boot and drove home. Lucky, I was only 4 miles from home. Went home and changed into my Jessica Simpson faux suede knee highs. I have since glued the shoe together. I wonder how many miles I have logged in those shoes over the last 6 + years; 50?, 100?, 200? Today, was a meetings day, again had the JS knee highs (rainy/windy day). After one meeting, a woman told me she always likes walking behind me because she likes the heels I wear. We discussed shoes for a few minutes, she and another woman were fans of JS shoes. Sheepishly she confessed that she owned over 50 heels, I told her "that's ALL, I have around 100." We laughed.

This is so true! I remember the first few times I wore heels in public. I was so focused on what people might say, or what types of looks I might get, that by the end of it, I was like “wow, no one really even looked, or seemed to care at all, one way or the other”. Psychologically, I think I prepared myself too much, for negative reactions, ridicule, or even dirty looks, and when none of that happened, I realized that the whole event really wasn’t as big of a deal to everyone else, as it may have been to me. It honestly felt like all of the mental preparation and courage I summoned leading up to my finally walking in public wearing heels, was a gigantic nothing burger! In a strange way, It was sort of a let-down, almost making me feel like all of the excitement I had been building up in my own head, along with the thought that others would be ready to laugh, ridicule, point, or whatever, gave the whole thing much more importance than it actually deserved. What I got from my first experiences wearing heels in public, is that most people either, don’t care, or are not paying attention (mainly because they are probably too wrapped up in their own routines and their own distractions). I truly believe more guys would venture out in heels, if they realized that 99.8 of the “barriers” and negative reactions they expect and prepare for, or that they imagine that actually prevents them from experiencing and exploring wearing heels in public, basically come mainly from their own thoughts, and not the public/society itself. As far as reactions go, over decades of wearing heels in public, I’ve gotten maybe three or four dirty looks, maybe double that amount of looks of confusion or “double takes” (like when someone sees something, looks away, then quickly looks back, as if to say, “did I really just see what I thought I saw?), and I should add that many of those were woman, who followed it up with a kind smile! As far as comments, I’ve gotten literally dozens, from males and females alike, mostly all positive! Definitely nothing that would have ever kept me from going back out in heels again, that’s for sure. Bottom line is that most people could care less, and the ones that may notice, are mostly kindhearted people, and not as judgmental as one may think.

I just completed my quick 1.5-day trip. And @pebblesf, the airline was SWA. I wore my Jessica Simpson black faux suede with block heels both ways. Stilettos would have been a nightmare of the airport floors. First with jeans and returned in dark red cords. I was one of the very few in colors other than white, black, blue, grey, and beige. Also, I had the highest heels everywhere. I saw some SWA flight attendants in short (2 inch) heels, and a Spirit FA also on short heels at the hotel I stayed at. Almost all the CLEAR and TSA agents complimented me on my knee-high boots before saying anything else. The guy at the car rental also complimented me on the ‘fierce’ boots before I got to his station. At least 20 other travelers also complimented me on the boots. Many, many double takes. Good quick trip. Another trip in a month. Again boots

I also wear my knee boots and OTK boots outside my jeans. As you say, it’s noticeable. Even so, a lot of people don’t notice. And those that do seldom give it much more than a passing glance.

I realize that folks "notice" when I wear stiletto boots/booties, can almost feel the gaze/stare behind me. But that's OK, hoping they are intrigued. Getting on/off an elevator is another place where I realize my boots will be noticed... Often wish I had a way to hear what was said after I got off the elevator, or perhaps better off not knowing. Oh well.. I can truly count the actual negative responses on one hand... Like "shyheels" says, you just have to "own it", be confident, never let em see you sweat....

I did actually wear stilettos in public just yesterday, to my kid's jazz band concert. And even then, I seem to have attracted very little notice, despite there being hundreds of people there. And yet, at the same time, I was a unicorn. I was not the only one I saw who was wearing heels, but I was the only one in high stilettos. It hasn't always been this way. I've certainly been challenged and even heckled in the past.

Today I wore my Nine West suede knee highs boots with pointy toes to work. One of the administrators ask me about how to buy boots. She has seen some 'but they were expensive". Yeah good suede boots cost money. This is the third time she has ask about shopping, I think she wants to go shoe (boot) shopping with me....LOL

Someone ripped me a new one on reddit for my reply to a guy's question about wearing his leggings in public for the first time. I responded that he might consider wearing a pair of gym/cycling shorts over the leggings in an effort to help get over feeling self concious about it. I also mentioned that leggings on a guy can be quite revealing, perhaps not appropriate for all occasions or audiences. Someone wrote back saying my advice was the worst ever, and that the world should "get over" the fear of seeing the human form because it is completely natural.... Well, I didn't really respond back but disagree for sure. Like I say, leggings can be pretty darn revealing on guys, no secrets for sure. The rest of the world might not be interested in knowing quite that much about this man's physique and endowment. Just the same way I would prefer not to watch a woman breast feed, especially when she refuses to cover up. I'm not really interested in accidentally walking into a stall while someone is relieving themselves. All of these are natural acts indeed, but not ones most of us are interested in witnessing. I guess sometimes we/guys need to consider the audience. Leggings at the gym, great. Leggings while jogging or biking, great again. But perhaps leggings might not be the best choice for going to the food store, or other places with alot of kids, family type restaurants, etc. Needless to say, I think guys can look great in leggings, but not all of us can "pull off the look successfully".

In Iowa, there is nothing like the MoT inspection required. There used to be. They got rid of that when I was a kid. I remember the sticker you had to put in the corner of your windscreen every year. Then they went to requiring inspection only when you sold the car. A decade later, they got rid of it completely. I remember as a pre-teen looking through the newspaper classifieds (remember them?) at used cars. The seller would list them as "red title" if the car couldn't pass inspection. One used to be able to pick such cars up for a little bit of nothing. We have never had any kind of emissions test. I am completely ignorant of what the other 49 states do or do not require. Expanding on the general subject, and again this is for the State of Iowa, if a vehicle sustains damage that exceeds 70% of its fair market value before the damage, then it is given a Salvage title, and cannot legally be operated on public roads. If one repairs such a vehicle, at that point it must be inspected. If it passes inspection, the vehicle will be given a Rebuilt title (which, up until a few years ago, they used to call a Prior Salvage title).

At a meeting today, two 4 inch stilettos, two 4 inch block heels, one kitten stiletto, two 2 inch block heels, five tennis shoes.

That is great to hear. My co-worker just bought an old car to drive around and restore as well. I don't know what it is, but I know it has a 455 CID engine in it! My daughters are all into Theater which I have always supported. There is so much too it, from breaking out of their shells, to public speaking, to the creativity of making the costumes and scenery, as well as engineering for some of the sets, and obviously not getting into trouble after school because they are so engaged in theater. So there is a lot to it than just what meets the eye and so we support them. So much so that we went to a Broadway show just to keep encouraging them. Great to hear your son is also stepping up while you're at work so much. Sounds like you are doing well as a parent!!

Land yachts for sure, but relatively easy to drive, good visability, and comfortable for long trips, provided there are plenty of fuel stations along the way

A report: I survived the first day of work. I think this is going to be all right. I actually walked a mile after supper, so I guess my energy level is high enough on Day 1. I'm on the fire alarm crew, which is not ideal but it's waaaaay better than doing underground! I ran into a guy I had worked with at some point in the past the other day at the grocery store. I was with my son. I was wearing my black Diane von Furstenberg clogs, which have 5 3/8" narrow heels (1" platform). I knew I knew the guy from work somewhere, but I couldn't think of his name (still can't). He sure knew mine. At any rate, it was patently obvious that he did not notice my shoes. Not everyone has an interest such as we. That's just weird, innit?

I got this bsi glue and glued the platform back onto the shoe. Wore the knee boots today without a problem.

Yes, heels are definitely in a downswing. I suppose I am fortunate in that my tastes run to chunky heeled boots in the 3-4” range for which there still seems to be a reasonable market - albeit not in my size range. it still surprises me though they there are not more active members here. This is a friendly and welcoming forum and I’m certain there is a latent desire out there to at least try high heels and see what all the fuss is - was? - about.

I wear knee high boots on the outside of my pants. People notice them (a mile away).

Very well said indeed. Our self consciousness at stepping outside the norms magnifies everything in our minds. the truth is that unless you are wearing something absolutely riveting - say, Barbie- pink thigh-high stilettos - a good percentage of passers by won't even notice, and those that =give a double take probably will have forgotten you ten minutes later, as they re-focus on their own lives. I don't wear my stilettos in public - mainlybeause I am not skilled enough to feel totally confident in them - but I wear feminine styled block-heeled knee and OTK boots regularly over skinny jeans and while I occasionally sense that I've attracted notice, it's never been a big deal. I think owning the look, being confident, makes all the difference. If you accept who you are, others will follow that lead.

Yes Zelenskyy was set up. That was deliberate. Nobody said a word about Elon Musk showing up to a cabinet meeting in a T-shirt and wearing a baseball cap! Zelenskyy dresses as he does for a very specific and symbolic purpose as anyone knows who’s read a newspaper in the past three years. Musk wore what he wore because he is a boor - note the spelling, I am not referring to his being South African I should add that I’m not trying to be political here, just making observations on fashion rules and hypocrisy. All other things being equal, the fact that someone - anyone - does not conform by wearing a suit should not be an issue. wearing a baseball cap (indoors!) and T-shirt to a cabinet meeting is disrespectful. That does not even make the grade as “smart casual”

I think a lot of women who wear them, wear them as we do, for the aesthetic. There were always those who wore them because they liked them, enjoyed wearing them, for the emotional and physical lift - and not merely because heels were expected in certain environments. They will continue to wear them, long after dress codes became more relaxed. The same with neckties. There are those who will always wear a tie. The writer Tom Wolfe was one. I remember reading some quote by him that it would be unthinkable not to be wearing a tie. Stephen Fry is another. He wrote quite an entertaining book about his love of ties starting from when he was a very young boy. We are more conscious of wearing heels because we are not supposed to be wearing them in the first place according to the dictates of society, but take that away, and our view of heels is probably not that dissimilar to those of female high heel aficionados.

more commonly called "moose knuckle" Leggings all the time outside of work, longer shirts, dress shirts, jacket or coat and sweatshirts. always look appropriate and aware

Between 85 and 100% of what I wear comes from the woman's side, but other than my heels, I don't look feminine. Even with gel fingernails. More colors and fabrics to play with, better fit.

And she is sooo right,"nice get nice" on the plane for sure! I was always very complimentary to youngsters who were polite and well behaved also. I would compliment them and the parents, letting them know they were doing a great job with their kids.... This was so rare, that I made time to say thankyou. I tried not to lose sight of the fact that flying is indeed hell, especially on our airline. Deregulation was the beginning of the downward spiral for US domestic carriers indeed. I'm not trying to excuse the horrible experience that air travel is today, just explain it... The "interweb" put the final nails in the coffin for sure. My apologies to all air travelers indeed!

I totally agree with you. And have a lot of sympathy with air crews who have to deal with all this every day, all day. I remember being on a long flight (I forget where) and wanted another drink. The stewardess came by and remembered what it was I had had earlier. I complimented her on her great memory and she smiled sadly and said she remembered the ones who say please and thank you.

Judging others based on silly things like wardrobe/dress is wrong for sure, but it is human nature unfortunately....Flying today is hell for sure, too many poor folks stuck jammed together in a super tight/uncomfortable space. It is easy for me to understand how some otherwise nice folks might "lose it" after a fun day at the airport! When I encountered an angry passenger, it was usually best to just "leave them alone", they will calm down. Oftentimes engaging with them makes things worse. They have had a bad day, have been mistreated by the airlines, stuck in weather delays/equipment issues, etc... Probably already missed the engagement/event they were headed for. Where I have always had an issue is selfishness, lack of consideration for others. Getting onboard a flight, thinking the seas are going to part for your "special needs"/lack of planning/wanting extras for nothing is not going to look good. There are too many people stuck on this packed flight, all experiencing the same lousy conditions/service etc. I get it, flying is hell these days.. The seats are way too small and uncomfortable, jammed too close together, it is horrible. But, we are all stuck in the same long tube, and I have little tolerance for those who refuse to consider the needs/rights of others, It is just not "all about you". Getting on an airplane unbathed, in dirty smelly clothes, is just inexcusable. Needless to say, I do understand that there are those that have some issues, regardless of how many showers they might take beforehand. I do understand that. But, getting on a plane when you are clearly much larger than a cramped coach seat can acommodate is just plain inconsiderate. What about the person stuck sitting next to you? There comes a point where you need to purchase two seats. Southwest "used to have a reasonable policy". Prior to boarding, they would bring you down to the plane to see if you could sit in the seat with the arm rest down without taking up space in the seat next to you. If not, you were required to buy another seat...But, if the flight went out with open seats, you were refunded afterwards...Very fair indeed. If I was unfortunate enough to have issues that made it tough to sit in one seat, I would buy two seats, no one would have to ask me to do so. I surely would not want to be humiliated trying to jam into a seat, knowing full well that I was taking up space in the other person's seating area as well Everyone is so afraid of getting sued, discrimination, etc. I get it..But, all too often, others needs/rights/considerations are ignored in favor of not getting sued/labeled/accused/filmed/selfied, etc. OK, enough of my ranting, sorry. Don

There’s no Christian denomination of which I am aware that sanctions wearing hats in church - by men at least. Women are certainly excused their Easter bonnets. The headgear you mention being worn in a synagogue is almost certainly not a baseball cap - a yarmulke, I believe, is what is worn. i have been in mosques in Africa, the Near East and Indonesia and while I certainly had to remove my shoes, I was never asked to don any headgear. And I can’t imagine them specifying baseball caps. there is an amusing scene in that mobster TV show, The Sopranos, where some young guy is wearing a baseball cap in a nice restaurant where Tony Soprano is having dinner. Tony has to straighten him out …

Depends on your particular choice of deity. In a mosque it is customary for men to cover their heads and more or less compulsory for women. In a synagogue head coverings are compulsory for men and often customary for women. I have no idea about other religions. I think there is some variation in custom between different christian sects.

If the heels were size 12 that might be a clue! 😊

Wearing hats indoors in some instances is all right - in public places such as railway stations and airports etc. Wearing hats in church or offices is really not appropriate. I take your point that having the chap show up in church at all is a good thing, and he shouldn’t be dissuaded but if he continues to show up wearing a hat throughout the service, perhaps somebody could discretely let him in on the rule of etiquette. He may not even know.

Myself, I do not care what people wear for the most part. I say "most part" because if I am in a bad part of town, and the only other person on the street is wearing all black, with a hoodie and it drawn over their heads, yes, I'm flipping my firearm off safety. That is not judging, but being situationally aware and prepared. If nothing happens, so be it, but how a person is dressed can be indicative of future behavior! But I have seen the opposite. Some of it is region and certain society, but I remember being in church and a some were upset that this guy came in and did not remove his ball cap. They seemed surprised, and I was like, "just be glad the guy came. who cares that he wore a hat through the whole service". But just so everyone knows, if we are going to talk politics, I won't be on this forum at all. There are plenty of forums where people can do that without stating rhetoric on her no matter what side their perspective is from. I have not read a newspaper in a decade, and chose to read books instead of watching television for the past seven years, and generally like to be blissfully unaware of things I cannot change.

While I know we are not supposed to judge others, myself I see it as inevitable and more so, is even logical to do. It is how we are wired to operate. We see things, we experience things and then we remember patterns. That can be both good and bad. On a plane which is the exact same situation repeated and repeated again, with clothes people are wearing being the only thing that really changes, oh for sure you are going to make associations with behaviors and how people are dressed. As a writer it can be fun to choose to work with these associations or write the opposing for contrast in my characters. For example, if it’s a minor character and my novel is already approaching the word limit, I might just have the typical alpha male so I do not have to describe the character as much and focus on the plot because people have experienced that combination a lot in life. But the plot might alternatively be about a nurse who kills patients by giving them lethal injections and thus also kills the stereotypical a “nurse is always caring” rationale. Part of that can be what the characters are wearing too. I once wrote a mystery where the killer walked through blood because she was wearing high heels and left triangular prints behind. It ended up being a false clue though because while seemingly it was the suspect that always wore high heels all through the novel, it was actually the hipster who typical wore sandals who did the murder. She only wore heels that night because she was going out on a dinner-date with her husband and was uncharacteristically dressed. But I could have easily changed the gender... what detective would ever think the killer was a MAN wearing high heels?

Offer to go boot shopping with her!

Totally understandable for sure. But I'll bet you didn't show up for your originally scheduled flight wearing "pok e man" pajamas, and scraggly flip flops showing off toes/feet that should be kept inside shoes at all times! Flying can definitely be HELL, I do understand that!

Let's look at this from a passenger's stand point. Last year, during my return flight from Sydney to LAX and then to my home airport, the 10 AM flight got cancel due to a damaged gasket. Got send to Melbourne. That 3 pm flight got delayed till 3 am. Got into LAX at 11:30 pm with no flights to my final airport till 7 am the morning. So after sleeping in a LAX terminal, I boarded my last flight. After 40+ hours of traveling, I didn't care what I looked like. All I wanted was to get home and go to sleep in my bed.

Well, I have Hunter boots bought about 20 years ago and they’ve seen some pretty heavy use in Antarctica aside from ordinary use in Britain and they’re going fine. I can’t speak to the quality of Hunter boots made last year or this because I’ve simp,y never needed to replace the ones bought twenty years ago

You want to see me at my worst? Force me to go to that damn grocery store! I hate that place with every fiber of my being!

To be sure, the Iowa interaction on the street is typically very brief, and rarely includes actually stopping one's pedestrian momentum, but it does exist. If the weather is particularly remarkable, it might involve slowing down and turning around slightly to get in a couple more words about how cold it is, or how nice it is. The grocery store or post office is a completely different animal in that regard. That might involve a much longer conversation.

Are they really? Because of the 'Hunter' label or because they are expensive? The quality is not what it used to be when they were UK-made and there are better wellies available at a much lower price. Maybe the man you saw was wearing 'old' Hunters (from the 1970s?) which have lasted well, as they normally did? My wellies cost me about £4, bought from a builders merchant some 25 years ago, and remain fine for walking in wet and muddy conditions - including canal towpaths. Even now, an equivalent pair can be found for £20 or less.

I have made the point before that women in the northern part of England and in Scotland are often rather shorter than their southern sisters and heels help to add the extra height they seem to desire. Moreover, there seems to be a different attitude to the desirable 'look' in the north, whereby women make much more of an effort to 'dress up', almost regardless of the occasion. There is a 'bravery' element too - typically seen in Newcastle etc - where bare feet in high-heeled sandals, skimpy dresses and no coat is considered the way to dress for an evening out, even in bitterly cold or snowy weather. What is worn by either sex in a given situation has long been inluenced by dress codes, explicit or otherwise. But, as the world moves to a more casual way of doing things, at work and at play, dress codes have been eroded if not entirely dismantled. Although, in the UK, the suit and tie is still 'expected' of men in most white-collar environments, it is increasingly the case that women are no longer obliged to wear the skirt-suit and heels that would have been regarded as obligatory in many occupations, particularly those considered 'professional'. The result is a plethora of increasingly-casual 'middle of the road' dressing - but people forget that those staying in the middle of the road tend to get run over. From observation, the position in the US appears to be more polarised - either fairly strict formality in dress codes in many situations or 'anything goes' - but correct me if I'm wrong. I can't but help referring to the shocking Trump/Zelensky meeting last week, when Mr Z was roundly criticised for daring to enter the White House in other than a suit (for reasons well-known whilst his country is at war) - his primed journalist attacker being apparently attired in a bright blue blazer! A cheap shot from cheap people. Would they have dared to challenge an Arabian or African leader wearing tradional robes - or a Scotsman in a kilt for that matter?

They’re great boots

That is so cool!

Cool! I love wearing them, and have gotten several compliments...

Leggings for winter cycling, and wearing under trousers during winters along the canal

On the towpaths it is very normal not only to say hi but often to engage in conversation- even with total strangers

Yeah, that's one of the major reasons I never wear leggings as a substitute for pants. They're always in conjunction with something, usually other pants for the wintertime. In the same vein, I have discovered a pitfall of wearing shorts the length that I like, and that is when you sit down, you have to pay particular attention to where the plumbing goes.

I've never actually been to the British Isles, but from what I hear, I'm very surprised. Where I live, if two people pass on the street (and it's not a crowded place), it's almost rude not to acknowledge each other somehow, but I understand that people from other parts of the world think this is very strange, if not downright creepy.

For us flying is a little different because we got private planes. Because of clients my wife's family carts around for real estate sales, they keep the planes very clean, but they are also very small planes. Since we are not "out in public" and usually flying into camp via the float plane, we seldom are dressed up. And... as sad a reality as it is, small planes are known for not always flying so we like to be ready for a swim or night stay in the forest after a plane crash. A lot easier to do that in jeans and a t-shirt then be dressed up nicely. But as much as I like high heels and pantyhose on a lady, I am conflicted with the dress requirements of flight attendant's. I can see where if they make it a career their compression stockings (they don't wear average pantyhose they wear compression tights) helps in the compression/decompression of take offs and landing for their better blood circulation, but in a crash a few flight attendant's have suffered severe burns because their nylons melted to their legs. It would seem to me that due to the unlikely event of a crash for a commercial plane, maybe compression tights would be better? Thoughts?

This pretty much describes me too. I wear leggings a lot and while I have tried to buy better ones, the ones I like the most, and fit best for me are the $5 kind found at thrift stores. I have worn them for so many years that I don't even pay attention to them anymore. I don't wear them in public except for maybe mowing the lawn or working in my woodworking shop. In all the years I have been doing this I have only had issues twice. Once was when I was sitting on the couch and the wife took a picture of a woodworking coffee table I had made. I was out of the picture... I thought... but the reflection in a mirror showed me which my mother-in-law just said, "Mr. Crushed Vamp looks very relaxed"... The other issue has been... well... women in leggings SOMETIMES get Camel Toe, but being tight pants and male, let's just say sometimes I show "Missile Toe"! 🙂

I think the femininity of my boots in an otherwise masculine look - jeans and fuller- creates a nice frisson. It’s edgy. And satisfying. I think a natural sensitivity and awareness of stepping out of bounds makes us more critical of how we appear in heels etc. we hold ourselves to some heightened standard. A woman would not do that. Women come in all shapes and sizes, like we do, and they buy and wear feminine clothes matter of course.

I hear ya for sure. But, I have found/noticed that a mix of subtle "feminine gear" along with decent "masculine gear" can be a great look indeed. Just a guy, happy to be a guy, wearing a touch of "feminine gear". I find this to be a very confident/powerful look indeed. Needless to say, many guys have nice long/lean/toned builds and look great in even more feminine gear, not a look I can pull off for sure... I recently bought a few pairs of women's nike leggings/work out gear pants from a thrift store, just to get a better idea of what size would work for me, and just how I would look. I enjoy wearing them, but afraid to see an actual picture of me...Afraid I might be "overstepping", writing checks my old dad bod just cant cash!

If you look at King Charles II’s coronation portrait he’s wearing real heels - they look to be about four inches. And at 6’1” he didn’t need the extra height. And the earlier Persian cavalrymen, while they were not wearing towering heels - about 2 to 2.5” - they looked like what we would say today were very feminine ankle boots. And bear in mind that when heels were in vogue for men, men were also wearing silk stockings, lace and bright colours, They all went together. I think it was real enough by our standards