The High Heeled Ruminations Of Melrose Plant

[Jkrenzer]

31 minutes ago, mlroseplant said:

Got my picture taken at my local hardware store today by a man about my age or maybe a little bit older. He obviously forgot to silence the fake SLR shutter sound on his phone, and he refused to make eye contact with me after I noticed the sound.  It did not strike any bit of panic in me like it would have back in the old days, but rather, I wanted to say to him that it was rather impolite to snap a furtive photo, and I was genuinely curious to see what he had, and then offer suggestions for improvement. However, I did nothing, and continued my transaction with a cashier I’ve known for years. 

I’m of two minds about this. On one hand, I really don’t give a shit. But on the other hand, there’s a golden band to remind me of someone who would not understand. Ah....sorry.....I forgot where I was for a moment. But on the other hand, I almost wish I had grabbed this situation as a teachable moment. What say you? For what it’s worth, I was wearing shorts and high heels quite similar to countless previous photos on this thread. 

It's happened to me several times. You're right, it's rude but in todays society that doesn't mean much anymore. Honestly I like making a dull person's day. No matter what they think is not relevant to me and to think how little must be going on for these people kind of amuses me. At least that's my thought on this.

[chesterx]

3 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Got my picture taken at my local hardware store today by a man about my age or maybe a little bit older. He obviously forgot to silence the fake SLR shutter sound on his phone, and he refused to make eye contact with me after I noticed the sound.  It did not strike any bit of panic in me like it would have back in the old days, but rather, I wanted to say to him that it was rather impolite to snap a furtive photo, and I was genuinely curious to see what he had, and then offer suggestions for improvement. However, I did nothing, and continued my transaction with a cashier I’ve known for years. 

I’m of two minds about this. On one hand, I really don’t give a shit. But on the other hand, there’s a golden band to remind me of someone who would not understand. Ah....sorry.....I forgot where I was for a moment. But on the other hand, I almost wish I had grabbed this situation as a teachable moment. What say you? For what it’s worth, I was wearing shorts and high heels quite similar to countless previous photos on this thread. 

It has only happened to me once when I noticed my pic being taken (she had the flash on). Like you i dont care, i'm in public doing something that is not considered average so i have no expectations of privacy. Still, it is somewhat rude to do that, but i have no intentions of confronting anyone about it. I have had a young lady come up to me and ask if she could take my picture. I agreed & pulled up my pant leg so my heels were clear to see. She was nice about it, & it kinda made my day. I would never have a pretty girl ever ask to take my picture otherwise...Used to be older folks were the ones most agog about my look, but these days most everyone is accepting about it, as i have had some enjoyable conversations with all age groups lately...

[p1ng74]

Did you literally catch him taking the photo of you, or did you just hear the click of the photo app?  Even if you just heard the sound, I would agree with you that there is a very high likelihood that he was snapping a photo of your heels, especially if he was avoiding you afterward.  But I would hate to falsely accuse someone, so I am with you, I’d just move on.

For what it is worth, I can’t imagine a situation where I would be offended by a stranger taking my picture.  People can have many reasons for taking your picture, ranging from mere curiosity to admiration, and I might even be flattered by it.  But I also think that the behavior of sneakily taking a photo of someone without having the guts to make eye contact and say hi to them can be creepy, depending on who you are and who this comes from, and people really shouldn’t be so socially awkward if they have good intentions.  

[Puffer]

I rather agree that taking a photo without 'permission' may be considered intrusive, if not exactly rude, although of course there is nothing unlawful or illegal about it, at least in the UK.   But the idea of making more than mild eye-contact with a stranger, let alone saying 'hi', would be anathema to many if not most UK citizens.   I guess that a furtive glance and/or pic would be the norm here, with no words spoken.

'Upskirting' has recently become a criminal offence here; perhaps 'downfooting' should be similarly treated!

[mlroseplant]

10 hours ago, p1ng74 said:

Did you literally catch him taking the photo of you, or did you just hear the click of the photo app?  Even if you just heard the sound, I would agree with you that there is a very high likelihood that he was snapping a photo of your heels, especially if he was avoiding you afterward.  But I would hate to falsely accuse someone, so I am with you, I’d just move on.

For what it is worth, I can’t imagine a situation where I would be offended by a stranger taking my picture.  People can have many reasons for taking your picture, ranging from mere curiosity to admiration, and I might even be flattered by it.  But I also think that the behavior of sneakily taking a photo of someone without having the guts to make eye contact and say hi to them can be creepy, depending on who you are and who this comes from, and people really shouldn’t be so socially awkward if they have good intentions.  

 

18 minutes ago, Puffer said:

I rather agree that taking a photo without 'permission' may be considered intrusive, if not exactly rude, although of course there is nothing unlawful or illegal about it, at least in the UK.   But the idea of making more than mild eye-contact with a stranger, let alone saying 'hi', would be anathema to many if not most UK citizens.   I guess that a furtive glance and/or pic would be the norm here, with no words spoken.

'Upskirting' has recently become a criminal offence here; perhaps 'downfooting' should be similarly treated!

Evidently, there are two nearly opposite norms of social behavior at work here. Where I'm from, if two strangers meet each other on the street, it is very normal if not expected that they will acknowledge the other verbally and with some form of eye contact. It's becoming somewhat less that way as the years go by, but still more likely than not. Of course, that's a rural vs. urban thing. I certainly would not expect someone in Chicago to return my salutation, but they very well might. Or they might shoot me, one. 😂

Obviously, it depends upon the venue. You're not going to greet everybody in a crowded supermarket, but you might strike up a conversation with a stranger in line behind you. That was the situation with our putative photographer, he was the next person in line behind me as I was purchasing my two stainless steel bolts and stop nuts for use in mounting a license plate to my trailer. It just seemed strange that he was "distracted" stuffing his phone back into his pocket at a moment when we should have been saying, "Sure is hot out for being the first part of June," or some such thing.

@chesterx, I cannot recall if someone has ever asked to take a picture of my shoes. I know I've been asked for other reasons several times, but I don't think anyone specifically wanted the shoes. If they ever did, I almost guarantee it involved alcohol. The whole incident is really no big deal, but it gave me something to write about, and y'all something to reply to. It's been awfully quiet around here lately.

[p1ng74]

Yes we have the same social norm of having friendly conversation at the checkout line here, and I have lost count the number of times we have talked about my boots.  But I also suppose Texans have an appreciation for cowboy boots.  
 

It’s a shame the man behind you wouldn’t make contact, because he missed out.  If you are as cool in person as you are online, I think he would have found you friendly and relatively normal, even if you are wearing heels.  He could have had a good conversation, rather than creep with this camera phone.  Every time this happens, it is a small missed opportunity to normalize heel wearing a little.  And every time you have a more normal interaction with someone in line, while wearing heels, it makes a contribution to normalizing heel wearing, even if the conversation has nothing to do with shoes.  

[Cali]

Had that conversation with a woman behind me at the open air market this morning.  We were talking in line and she  said "I just saw your wedges, wish I could wear wedges like that."  I take every opportunity I get to show that a man can wear heels and be perfectly normal.

[RonC]

2 hours ago, Cali said:

We were talking in line and she  said "I just saw your wedges, wish I could wear wedges like that." 

Ahh, the old wish I could wear those line.  I know there are people that could not wear heels, my wife included.  But that line comes out of the mouths of way too many people perfectly capable of wearing them.  I find the statement mostly frustrating, especially coming from a woman.

[Cali]

40 minutes ago, RonC said:

Ahh, the old wish I could wear those line.  I know there are people that could not wear heels, my wife included.  But that line comes out of the mouths of way too many people perfectly capable of wearing them.  I find the statement mostly frustrating, especially coming from a woman.

She had a 1 year on her back. But she thought the wedges were cute.  The open air market takes place in the parking lot of a old shopping complex and the pavement is in very bad shape.  I rarely see anybody else in any heels there.

Edited June 13, 2021 by Cali

[Puffer]

10 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Evidently, there are two nearly opposite norms of social behavior at work here. Where I'm from, if two strangers meet each other on the street, it is very normal if not expected that they will acknowledge the other verbally and with some form of eye contact. It's becoming somewhat less that way as the years go by, but still more likely than not. Of course, that's a rural vs. urban thing. I certainly would not expect someone in Chicago to return my salutation, but they very well might. Or they might shoot me, one. 😂

Obviously, it depends upon the venue. You're not going to greet everybody in a crowded supermarket, but you might strike up a conversation with a stranger in line behind you. That was the situation with our putative photographer, he was the next person in line behind me as I was purchasing my two stainless steel bolts and stop nuts for use in mounting a license plate to my trailer. It just seemed strange that he was "distracted" stuffing his phone back into his pocket at a moment when we should have been saying, "Sure is hot out for being the first part of June," or some such thing.

...

I should perhaps qualify my earlier comments, which reflect usual behaviour in the UK - or at least the more urban areas of the southern half.   Casual encounters between strangers in open areas of a town will rarely produce any acknowledgement, spoken or otherwise.   It is the sign of a 'foreigner' (i.e. someone from the next county but one) that he or she might attempt a greeting, or even a conversation.   Not really true in the country, where a polite 'good morning' or similar is usual.   When on public transport in the south east, speaking to the stranger squashed up close to you in the rush-hour is distinctly frowned upon, unless (perhaps) he has vomited over you or is threatening you with a really sharp knife or a gun.

Only yesterday, strolling casually in the sun towards a supermarket in my town, I was taken aback when a complete stranger gave me a semi-salute and a cheery greeting as he passed.   I immediately assumed that there was something amiss with my appearance - perhaps my fly was open or I had half my breakfast round my face.   (Neither was the case, nor was I wearing heels.)   No, I am not joking - the encounter, harmless though it was, was momentarily unnerving.

When queuing (another popular British pastime) In a shop, or at a bus stop etc, it is not uncommon however to commence or respond to a brief conversation with a fellow detainee.   But it must be strictly restricted to the activity in hand (e.g. the wait for service, the absence of stock, the size of the shop assistant's breasts) or, exceptionally, the prevailing weather.

However, despite all I have just said, the stranger in town (particularly if from overseas) will invariably receive a polite and helpful response to any equally polite comment, question or request for directions that he might make in innocent ignorance of these British conventions.   Welcome to the UK!  😄 

[RonC]

On 6/13/2021 at 4:30 PM, Cali said:

She had a 1 year on her back. But she thought the wedges were cute.  The open air market takes place in the parking lot of a old shopping complex and the pavement is in very bad shape.  I rarely see anybody else in any heels there.

Somehow I doubt her comment was confined to the wearing of heels at said market.  However, the duties required as the mother of a young child could definitely curtail the heel height of a Mom's shoes.  Chasing a toddler is better left to flats.

[Isolathor]

On 6/12/2021 at 10:17 PM, mlroseplant said:

Got my picture taken at my local hardware store today
What say you? 

That was impolite for sure.

But let me wander of course for a bit. When i take pictures of my wife in high heels we are often joined by other who take pictures of this session too, at least 90% without asking. But my wife enjoys it and even poses for them, i guess for a female it comes as a compliment and not as a moment of weirdness.

[Puffer]

2 hours ago, Isolathor said:

That was impolite for sure.

But let me wander of course for a bit. When i take pictures of my wife in high heels we are often joined by other who take pictures of this session too, at least 90% without asking. But my wife enjoys it and even poses for them, i guess for a female it comes as a compliment and not as a moment of weirdness.

I think that you and your wife are being very generous to treat a stranger's impromptu photography as a compliment, even if you do both enjoy it.   Most women (unless obviously posing or modelling) would surely treat such a 'liberty' as weird or borderline perverted, especially if they were alone?   I suppose in your wife's case she is indeed clearly posing so there is an implied invitation to admire and capture on film, with or without permission.

[Shyheels]

They might even think it is some kind of street fashion shoot.

[mlroseplant]

4 hours ago, Isolathor said:

That was impolite for sure.

But let me wander of course for a bit. When i take pictures of my wife in high heels we are often joined by other who take pictures of this session too, at least 90% without asking. But my wife enjoys it and even poses for them, i guess for a female it comes as a compliment and not as a moment of weirdness.

Obviously quite a different situation than me buying bolts at the hardware store, but I do find it a bit strange, nevertheless. Pre-pandemic, my wife used to have me take a number of pictures of her after church on Sunday morning, to show off whatever outfit she was wearing that week. I cannot possibly imagine somebody approaching us during this time to start snapping pictures. Even if they asked, it would be a little weird. Thinking further on the subject, if such a thing were to ever happen, my wife would probably enjoy it, because then she would get to beat me over the head with it. "Anh yêu! See! I am more beautiful than you think I am." I am sorry I cannot convey vocal tone or accent for comic effect.

On 6/13/2021 at 7:57 AM, p1ng74 said:

Yes we have the same social norm of having friendly conversation at the checkout line here, and I have lost count the number of times we have talked about my boots.  But I also suppose Texans have an appreciation for cowboy boots.  
 

It’s a shame the man behind you wouldn’t make contact, because he missed out.  If you are as cool in person as you are online, I think he would have found you friendly and relatively normal, even if you are wearing heels.  He could have had a good conversation, rather than creep with this camera phone.  Every time this happens, it is a small missed opportunity to normalize heel wearing a little.  And every time you have a more normal interaction with someone in line, while wearing heels, it makes a contribution to normalizing heel wearing, even if the conversation has nothing to do with shoes.  

You will find, like Brad Paisley once sang, that I am so much cooler online.

Edited June 15, 2021 by mlroseplant

[spikesmike]

Heelers : Well here we go again . What is the complaint ? Any man ( or woman ) who goes out in public in high heels is subject to eventually be seen . You put your selves in that position . You are asking for it and then you bitch when your photographed . What is your major malfunction ? Unless your picture is used my someone for illegal purposes the public has the rite of freedom .  Just like you .   Mike

[p1ng74]

26 minutes ago, spikesmike said:

Heelers : Well here we go again . What is the complaint ? Any man ( or woman ) who goes out in public in high heels is subject to eventually be seen . You put your selves in that position . You are asking for it and then you bitch when your photographed . What is your major malfunction ? Unless your picture is used my someone for illegal purposes the public has the rite of freedom .  Just like you .   Mike

I think the issue is not that the picture was taken, but rather the unfriendly behaviour following it.  Yes, if I am comfortable expressing myself by wearing the heels in public among strangers then at some point I should also be comfortable talking about them and even letting people take pictures of them.  The problem here is, this person seemed to snap a photo and then took a very unfriendly stance towards mlrose. 

I admit that I am a bit camera phone happy when it comes to certain things that I see in public (not heels, but I sometimes snap a photo of a rare car or something else interesting to me.)  I'm glad mlrose shared this interaction as it is a good reminder to me on social norms.  If I have the guts to take a photo, I better also have the guts to say hi, and try to be friendly, and offer some positive social interaction through it.  

[Jkrenzer]

1 hour ago, spikesmike said:

Heelers : Well here we go again . What is the complaint ? Any man ( or woman ) who goes out in public in high heels is subject to eventually be seen . You put your selves in that position . You are asking for it and then you bitch when your photographed . What is your major malfunction ? Unless your picture is used my someone for illegal purposes the public has the rite of freedom .  Just like you .   Mike

Mike 11 yrs since you snapped that lower picture. You still have those pleaser boots?

[spikesmike]

JKrenzer : About my boots . OH hell yes, and the spurs too . I wear them quite often during the winter along with several other pair of boots. These above boots are in perfect shape as well as the eight (8) other pair of spurs I own .  Mike

[Jkrenzer]

1 hour ago, spikesmike said:

JKrenzer : About my boots . OH hell yes, and the spurs too . I wear them quite often during the winter along with several other pair of boots. These above boots are in perfect shape as well as the eight (8) other pair of spurs I own .  Mike

Hey Mike was asking about the single sole boots. 

[Isolathor]

22 hours ago, Puffer said:

I suppose in your wife's case she is indeed clearly posing so there is an implied invitation to admire and capture on film, with or without permission.

 

22 hours ago, Shyheels said:

They might even think it is some kind of street fashion shoot.

That of course is a reality, she is clearly posing for the pictures. However, it only happens when we are shooting high heels. If she is wearing anything with a heel less than 4" (this is an example:

)

nobody cares even when she is posing.

There must be a special interest in high heels, mostly from men. Also the heels must be thin, chunkier heels don´t get that much attention. 😁

 

Edited June 16, 2021 by Isolathor
added text

[Shyheels]

There is also an association with high stiletto heels, models and glamour. Not that many women wear high stiletto heels these days so when you see one who is, and who is obviously posing, it would not take a great leap of imagination for a passer-by to think this was some kind of a magazine fashion shoot.  And you wife could easily pass for a model.

[mlroseplant]

It is interesting that one simple event would spark such a wide variety of opinions, ranging from "Get over it" to "I wonder what the greater implications for societal norms are?" Honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal, but it did give me something to write about, didn't it?

The one thing that nobody has brought up which was actually one of my greatest concerns at the time is how did the photo come out, if indeed one was even taken? If the purpose of the photo was to send it around to friends and make fun of me, then I suppose it doesn't matter how the photo turned out, as long as it showed all the necessary elements: The heels and making it clear that I'm a man. And possibly my shorts. However, even the People of Walmart type photos have to be of a certain quality to be successful.

Having taken a number of candid photographs over the years, it is extremely difficult to get a good one without some cooperation of the person being photographed, especially heel photographs. I am specifically thinking of years past in Vietnam where I was trying to give members of this forum an idea about Vietnamese street fashion and heel wearing habits. I never had a street photo turn out very well, as least not to show what I wanted to show. I am genuinely curious to know if our putative photographer in the instant case got what he wanted, or if he was rather disappointed and the photo is deleted now.

[Isolathor]

A very important point for heelsphotography is how low your camera was when a photo is taken. If the man behind you did not hold the camera/phone low the picture itself may be lame.

[Shyheels]

With any photo perspective is important

[Isolathor]

4 hours ago, Shyheels said:

And you wife could easily pass for a model.

Thank You for the compliment! 🤗

[spikesmike]

JKrenzer : The single sole high heels in this photo are oxfords . Just like any other shoe, but with a 5 " heel . All of my heels are in perfect shape . I have so many high heel shoes I rotate wearing them so as not to wear out . Yes I still have them .    Mike 

[p1ng74]

13 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

However, even the People of Walmart type photos have to be of a certain quality to be successful.

Lol, since I have worn heels in Walmart I had to go check if someone had put me up there, and generally if there are any pictures of guys in heels.  There are a few:

https://www.peopleofwalmart.com/get-to-steppin/

[SF]

Dang, they left my pic out......   And I was look’in tight.....

[Cali]

There's still time SF to get you pic taken.  Go to Walmart and strike a pose by the beer display and wait.  Someone will take you pic, especially in O.C.