First Public Outing

[hhl4vr]

Hello, It was been so wonderful that I found this site (for couple weeks now). I so envy those whom have been able to venture out in public - something I want to try (say maybe in the next couple weeks as I have a work trip coming and will be away from home) For those whom have read my comments - I have keep this a huge secret and not shared my passion for heels until this site. I'm so happy that I'm not alone and just by reading all the nice comments - I have started to not "hate myself" for this passion but just enjoy the rare moment I have gotten to wear heels. So not to go on forever - is there any tips to follow the first time

[Stilletto2004]

I've only done it a few times. I think the biggest thing is confidence. If you look like you're doing something wrong, you'll LOOK like you're doing something wrong. Stand straight, walk with confidence, and smile. People can tell if you're trying to hide something, I swear. Just be the guy you are, don't think about the heels. Good luck!!

[bootsguy80]

Having just recently had my first outing in heels I am far from an expert on the subject. I do agree, confidence is certainly the key. I had the advantage of being with a group of people (male and female) also wearing heels so it may have been easier for me. For me it was interesting how after some time you almost forget about it and just go on doing whatever activity you are doing. It seems that as long as you dont act out of place, others dont see you as out of place either. Hope you enjoy your outing as much as I did.

[Thighbootguy]

Going out is a lot of fun! The first step (generally taken getting out of the car) is the hardest one. Some members have reported it took 10 minutes or more to take that step. Rather than repeat my advice on going out, I'll just reference this link.

Recent post on going out

The pervious posts on presenting a confient image are right on the mark. If you can't do that, don't go out.

Enjoy your heels.

TBG

[Shafted]

In addition to the confidence factor make sure your outfit is coordinated. Wearing shoes that don't go well with an outfit makes them stand out more. Don't wear the shoes for their own sake. They have to be integrated into a complete look.

[CRabbit]

The folks above are spot on. My first time getting out of the car took over half an hour, and I'd given in getting out of the car twice prior! That first step is massive, but if you put that out of your mind and as soon as your at your destination simply get out of the car, it'll be a LOT easier. People wont stop and laugh at you as you get out - in fact I would put money on the fact that no-one would even see you. Heels: Wear something comfortable. Something around the 3inch mark with a chunky or wide heel and no platform is ideal. Because this is your first time out, you won't be familiar with the different surfaces you're going to walk on so lower heels mean easier learning curve. Watch out for polished marble surfaces too. Black shoes are the easiest to blend in with. Outfit: sensible top, decent pair of long boot cut jeans and your about sorted really. Those long jeans will hide the shoes really well, so you can relax a little more knowing your heels are not visibly obvious from a distance. This is just my opinion, based on my experience and how I'd have done it differently. It's different for everyone, so adjust to your tastes. Let us know how it goes, Chris

[JeffB]

To add my two cents worth (adjusted for inflation), it's important to act calm, cool and collected, as if wearing high heels is no big deal. That way you don't attract any undue attention than you would by acting shy, nervous or furtive, giving people cause to wonder just what you're up to. And yes, by all means, act and look confident as if you own the world, radiate a sense of boldness in your demeanor. Something to take into consideration, and I've said this numerous times before is that ninety-nine percent of the people you encounter while out and about in heels are too wrapped up in their own lives and affairs to worry about or care about a guy strutting about in women's shoes. And at this time of year with everyone rushing about shopping for Christmas gifts, chances are you'll be even more ignored. Be sure to dress tastefully and appropriately for your surroundings and you should do well.

[docs41]

I've come a long way since I began wearing in public. I remember wearing styles that I thought were so daring back then, but today the same style wouldn't even cause any hesitation now. In fact, the "daring" shoes of the past are my regular selections for everyday wear today. It will come in time. Good luck!

[yozz]

Another two cents worth: The keyword is: "act normal". Behave like you always behave when you go out in your (until now) regular shoes. Looking like you own the world while you never looked like that before, won't work. You will be out of place. Just be your normal self and go about your things. Y.

[Dr. Shoe]

1. Act normal. You need to look as if you wear heels every day of your life. 2. Go to a crowded place! Yes, this does go against the natural instinct but in a crowd you are less likely to stand out than if you were in an area where there are only a few people. 3. Do something normal. Many guys start by getting fuel for their car. Try shopping in a supermarket or going to the cinema. 4. Accept compliments graciously. If someone says that they like your shoes, thank them. Ignore negative comments. 5. Just behave like you normally would. Have the same conversations you normally would and try to forget you're wearing heels. 6. Don't draw anyone's attention to the fact that you're wearing heels. Don't ask passers-by if they like your heels for example.

[roniheels]

To add my two cents worth (adjusted for inflation), it's important to act calm, cool and collected, as if wearing high heels is no big deal. That way you don't attract any undue attention than you would by acting shy, nervous or furtive, giving people cause to wonder just what you're up to. And yes, by all means, act and look confident as if you own the world, radiate a sense of boldness in your demeanor.

Something to take into consideration, and I've said this numerous times before is that ninety-nine percent of the people you encounter while out and about in heels are too wrapped up in their own lives and affairs to worry about or care about a guy strutting about in women's shoes. And at this time of year with everyone rushing about shopping for Christmas gifts, chances are you'll be even more ignored. Be sure to dress tastefully and appropriately for your surroundings and you should do well.

Jeff, you nailed it! I just recently spent a day out-and-about in high heels, and there were virtually little or no reactions. And the reactions I received were totally positive. When you get so used to wearing high heels in public, even you yourself sometimes don't even realize you're wearing high heels. Confidence and expereince are definitely the keys!

[JeffB]

Jeff, you nailed it! I just recently spent a day out-and-about in high heels, and there were virtually little or no reactions. And the reactions I received were totally positive. When you get so used to wearing high heels in public, even you yourself sometimes don't even realize you're wearing high heels. Confidence and expereince are definitely the keys!

Oh, yes! I feel the exact same way. Once I've been out and about for awhile, I tend to forget I'm wearing heels as my comfort level is high and I focus more on where I am and what I'm doing instead of what I'm wearing.

When it comes to that all important confidence, it can come slowly or envelop you all at once, nevertheless, you have to embrace that confidence and nurture it so you can feel better about all your future outings, thus gaining experience.

[hhl4vr]

Thanks for all the wonderful tips - it really helps and I will keep you all up to date. I hope to get the courage to try my first public outing in next couple weeks.

[scrappycoco]

Hello,

It was been so wonderful that I found this site (for couple weeks now). I so envy those whom have been able to venture out in public - something I want to try (say maybe in the next couple weeks as I have a work trip coming and will be away from home)

For those whom have read my comments - I have keep this a huge secret and not shared my passion for heels until this site. I'm so happy that I'm not alone and just by reading all the nice comments - I have started to not "hate myself" for this passion but just enjoy the rare moment I have gotten to wear heels.

So not to go on forever - is there any tips to follow the first time

Ok I would like to first say welcome to the club:smile: I know it can be really hard to accept that you a differ from what is considered the accepted norm for a man. I.E wearing heels and other things, if you catch my drift. A few words of wisdom from my travel's and what not. I think someone said it already, but I'll say it again in a different way. Don't be ashamed of the fact that you wear heels. The worst mistake that we guys make when we do something out of the normal guy mold is lie. If someone ask's you about you wearing heels tell them, and for god sake whatever you do DO NOT LIE! Trust me people at some point espcially those in your inner circle will ask you at some point. Do not lie tell them the truth. Some will be cool with it and others wont. I have come to figure out that those that matter wont mind and those that mind don't matter! Another word of advise as far as going out and about. For god sake wear something that someone else male or female would wear. What I am getting at here is do not go out in a snow wearing stilleto pumps. How many women would you see doing that? Be smart wear the right type of shoe for the right type of occasion. Hooker heels while they maybe fun for play in the bed room or at the strip club, not only get looks from people when women wear them out and about but really would turn heads on a man. Just be smart in your choice of footwear. Make sure you can walk in them too. Nothing looks more silly than a man or women wearing 4" stilleto heels and can't walk in them. Wear something that you know you can walk in on most any surface and then work you way to the other styles of heels. Trust me it's a whole different world when walking in heels period. You need to be a lot more aware of what you are doing, even more so when first starting out. Last but not least it's all about the outfit! think about the image that you want to show the world in your mind and then put it together. I have fought long and hard trying to figure out what I want people to see when I go out and I have finally came up with clothing that work's well for me! I hope My advise helps you out.

[Shafted]

Well said scrappy.

[terri17]

hi im currently wearing 5 in spike heels out and most if the time no one notices or cares terri

[Shafted]

Terri, Take a look of the gender of the other posters. (wink, wink) I just have the feeling you just found hhplace, and jumped in without reading around yet.

[Gudulitooo]

Terri, I think you are wrong, most men should pay you a second look !!! Bye

[danielp6406]

Thanks for all the wonderful tips - it really helps and I will keep you all up to date. I hope to get the courage to try my first public outing in next couple weeks.

Lots of good advice here. I'm sure your first outing wearing heels will be OK.

Do it with confidence. You will then realize it was no big deal after all.

hi im currently wearing 5 in spike heels out and most if the time no one notices or cares

terri

Greetings terri17 and welcome to this forum :-)

I'm sure you realize that a woman wearing heels is "normal" in our society.

This is why no one notice or cares (But let me tell you that a lot of men do notice...)

Unfortunately, we cannot say the same when a man do the same isnt-it ?

Why men are not "allowed" to wear heels and enjoy them if they want to ?

If the shoe is "conservative" and worn with appropriate clothing. Why not ?

( And I'm not referring to mini-skirt and pink stiletto here... )

Please feel free to share your passion for high heels and fashion with us.

Welcome again !

[hhl4vr]

Hello, Been away from the site for a few days as I was away from work. I think that I might try my first public outing this week. I have a work road trip and will be staying at a hotel that is attached to a casino. Which I'm thinking may be a good place to have my "first". The casino will be loud and usually darker. Does anyone have any thoughts or ideas. I plan to try my first outing in a pair of ankle boots with a 3in heel.

[kikepa]

You are who you are. Be that person!

[tpryor]

Hello,

Been away from the site for a few days as I was away from work. I think that I might try my first public outing this week. I have a work road trip and will be staying at a hotel that is attached to a casino. Which I'm thinking may be a good place to have my "first". The casino will be loud and usually darker.

Does anyone have any thoughts or ideas. I plan to try my first outing in a pair of ankle boots with a 3in heel.

I bought a pair of 3" boots for my first outing as they are easy to walk in on any surface (one of the comments here) and they went with my outfit. I went to a restaurant for dinner and we were both wearing the same boots (OK - the same type of boots, she had her pair and I had mine ).

I parked a fair way across the parking lot and we walked in together. We stood at the hostess stand for a minute with people milling about, we were seated and proceeded to enjoy a wonderful dinner. I found myself sitting with one heel up on the leg of the table (after a while) HOPING someone would notice! Not one word, and only a couple of servers noticed but said nothing.

Arriving back at the hotel, I needed a blanket (none were in the room) for my partner and walked up to the front desk with people all around, got the blanket, and went back to the room. Again, not a look - not a sound.

The WONDERFUL encouragement I received from this board gave me the courage to try it - and it was FANTASTIC! I feel SO much more confident and can not wait to do it again.

The point of all of this is - GO FOR IT! It's a great experience and you will enjoy it. We ALL here support you and can only offer you encouragement.

Let us know how it goes. Remember, if there are no pictures, then it didn't happen.....

[Slides 'n Heels]

I think you made a great choise for these boots to go out in public for the first time. With 3" you feel you are definitely on heels. But not too high, so quiet "walkable" which is good for your self confidence. And you have chosen a relatively neutral, but stylish model in black. A good choise with your outfit.

[HappyinHeels]

tpryor, Great to see you had your first outing. You look quite dapper in your slacks and dress shirt to the point that your boots indeed blend right in. I agree with the others that the height is enough to give the feeling of wearing heels yet not create all the attention you don't yet want...or maybe you do?? Ease into it and wear them in more places and you will ENJOY, ENJOY, ENJOY! HappyinHeels:wave:

[hhl4vr]

Well my plan did not go as I had hoped. My work place decided to sent a few of us on the road trip so I was not able to go the casino route as planned as those who came with me are huge gamblers. However I did manage to do somewhat of my first public outing. I wore them in the car and went for a drive and pulled up to a Mc Ds restaurant and I did go in and place an order and eat at a table.. It was very nerve raking but felt so wonderful.....I guess it was a baby step.. I will have to wait till next trip in January......with the holidays coming I will be away from the site and my shoes.....

[Shafted]

Congratulations on you first public outing. Wether you planned it that way or not it was way bigger than a baby step.

[Tech]

hi im currently wearing 5 in spike heels out and most if the time no one notices or cares

terri

So your a guy?

[hhl4vr]

Well I was able to finally go through with it and have my first real public outing. I was on a road trip which gave me the chance to wear heels. It was a sudden road trip and I did not have a chance to bring my own pair of high heels. However,the hotel I was staying at was beside a second hand store so I went in and bought a pair of boots. (they were about 3.25 inch heel plus not there was not much selection to choose from) I never was one to buy boots before this but tried and and realized that it might be easier to try in public than high heels shoes (at least that is what I was thinking) I then walked went back to the hotel and put the boots on and took the elavator down to car garage and drove to a mall that was really busy. I walked around the mall. It was felt so amazing, scary, thrilling all at the same time. I then drove to a burget joint and ate at a table then drove back to hotel. There was no incident-not even sure anyone noticed me. If it was not for this site and reading about all of you and your experiences I never would have done it. I took a picture with my blackberry and will try to upload it (the picture is not the best quality)

[Shafted]

Yay, another first real heeling experience in spikes no less. Good job!

[JeffB]

Well, bravo to you, York! The very first time is both exciting and frightening at the same time, but now that you've got that outing under your belt, things will become easier from there.