kneehighs Posted February 12, 2010 Author Posted February 12, 2010 The comparison between KH and Alfi only goes as far as they both attract a "wide circle of gorgeous female companions." As far as KH being promiscuous, he's way too nice a guy to "kiss and run"........ I think the true difference is that I don't lie to get sex. I'm pretty straightforward and honest with my intentions from the get go. I am dating and seeing other women. There is not "just one girl" for me exclusively (yet). So if a girl just wants sex too, it works in both of our favors. And trust me, there are more women content with a "friends with benefits" arrangement than a lot of guys here may realize. It's going to be a busy month now... Until next time.. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
kneehighs Posted March 21, 2010 Author Posted March 21, 2010 SUMMARY: Meat Packing District Wine Bar. Cab to: Soho club. Cab to: Gothic club on Bowery and Spring. Walk to Sub-Mercer at Mercer Kitchen. Night ends. OUTFIT Outfit was leather Do It Yourself shorts, high waisted, bought as leather pants at vintage store. The current trend is for shorts to be loose fitting at the hem around the leg, so I pulled out my old black leather shorts and re-trimmed the hem, making sure they were straight and no inner lining was exposed. Added in women's Green striped Zara top, a women's black Mango blazer, rolled up the sleeves, so that the green stripes from the shirt sleeves looked like cuffs on the blazer. 4.5" Nine West cone heels. Made sure my legs were clean and well shaven. I'm out! It was nice escaping the fashion scene I had been married to since the couture shows in January. (ugh) FESTIVITIES LINE UP At the wine bar I chatted up one girl who told me about her boyfriend about 15 minutes into our convo. I knew she wanted to have her cake and eat it too. Within another 5 minutes she had admitted to going on a date with another man. She loved my outfit, my legs (she shined a light from her iphone on them twice) and made me swear to wear pumps next time. It was all fun and I seriously doubt I'll ever see her again. I also experimented for the first time ever tonight with some perfume. It was only $35 and it was BURBERRY. Sprayed just a tad on and got complimented by more than a few girls on what I was wearing. I only sprayed myself lightly with it though, just a spray to the shoulders, and neck and that was it. This girl took a spray of it and sprayed her cleavage. Bounced to a club in Soho. Saw two girls dancing alongside the bar. Opened them with ,"so who are you dancing for right now? We need to get you a stage with those moves...." she laughs, talks a little, goes right into my frame. I added, "we just need to get you some money and fame now! how about I be your agent?" she laughs and goes with it even more. "so which magazine cover do you want first? People or Vogue?" she tells me Vogue. "OK, great. I can get you on the cover of Vogue Mongolia. All those tribal dudes will love a blonde" she laughs hysterically. Bounce to Gothic Club. F-ing $18 cover charge. "does that include a free drink at the bar?" "no, sorry" I felt it was more like Torture Garden in there tonight. A lot of people with over-sized top hats decorated in red velvet flowers. Talked one set of girls up. They thought I looked great. They laughed at my heels. IMPORTANT NOTE: don't take that personally when people laugh at your heels! It was good fun for them. Decide this is not where I want to be tonight, plus I don't see many girls I'm attracted to in there. BOUNCE. See a girl wearing a blue dress and a black blazer with sexy striped heels. She's alone on the corner of Spring and Lafayette wearing a blue dress with a black blazer. "Blue on Black! Great look" I say to her. Leads into her eventually saying "i think it's sexy when a guy wears heels" We exchanged numbers. When I do that however, I make sure they call me from their phone ON THE SPOT. This way I know it's a real number. Read her text first thing when I walked in the door. Find myself on the sidewalk of Mercer street. Cross paths with a friend. Chat him up for about 5 minutes until I can tell he wants me to leave because he was chatting with some seriously beautiful blonde. Eject and head up a block. Chat up another girl on the sidewalk. She had wedge heels, but the wedge part that is usually solid was hollow. "I love your shoes! A hollow wedge? (I stick the tip of my toe into them)"....and that leads to a good 15 minute convo. Finally submerse myself into Sub-Mercer. The basement of Mercer Hotel. Meet two girls. One from Denmark (hot as hell) and another from Australia (not so hot). We chatted all night long. I was trying for a 3-way close, but because they work together, it wasn't going to happen. Still flirt extensively with Australian girl. Overall, it was an amazing night of social interaction wearing my heels. The Danish girl called my outfit, "brilliant" and said she'd wear it as did her friend. Both girls worked in the jewelry industry, for one of fashion's most luxurious worldwide jewelers. CONCLUSION I love when I can inspire a girl to want to dress like me, especially when heels are in the mix. Good night overall. I felt comfortable wearing my booties with shorts. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
Thighboots2 Posted March 21, 2010 Posted March 21, 2010 Nice evening. Try Narcisso Rodriguez. Its a great scent. I use the homme, but occasionaly pinch a little of my wife's femme version. Very compatible the two scents. My niece didn't realise NR did the homme and though I was wearing the femme version. Same base I guess, the femme is a little more soft and cuddly. Simon. Are you confusing me with someone who gives a damn?
Puffer Posted March 26, 2010 Posted March 26, 2010 Nice evening. Try Narcisso Rodriguez. Its a great scent. I use the homme, but occasionaly pinch a little of my wife's femme version. Very compatible the two scents. My niece didn't realise NR did the homme and though I was wearing the femme version. Same base I guess, the femme is a little more soft and cuddly. Simon. Is that your 'two scents worth', Simon?
kneehighs Posted April 4, 2010 Author Posted April 4, 2010 We all know some people assume we are gay for wearing heels. Well have you ever wondered what it would be like if you played out that role and pretended to be gay, just to see what would happen with the girls you were talking to? I did that Saturday night, with 2 girls to establish "social proof". Because other girls in the lounge saw me chatting with two beautiful women extensively, it increased my value in their eyes and made it easier for me to engage them later in conversation. The outfit was simple: black 4.5" Nine West cone heel booties, Do It Yourself matte finish leather shorts, green and white striped shirt tucked in, black blazer with sleeves rolled up, sleeves from striped shirt peeking out from underneath the blazer sleeves. Key areas of grooming before I went out: 1. Check nose hairs. You can buy a clipper at the local drug store for about $10 U.S. to make sure no hairs are coming out from the nose 2. Check the "unibrow". Made sure I shaved/plucked the area between the eyebrows to avoid a "Bert" unibrow look 3. Check neck hair. Make sure the back of my neck was shaved clean, totally. 4. Check sideburns. Use electric shaver to make sure they were shaved straight, clean, and neatly. 5. Steam striped shirt. This is similar to ironing, but easier. It removes wrinkles. 6. Used a lint roller on my blazer. Be clean cut! 7. Shine my shoes. This means not just applying glossy black shoe polish, but rubbing them with a cloth afterwards to build in the polish. I sat at a bar and two girls actually moved closer to me. They opened me. Eventually it came out that they thought I was gay, based off my clean cut appearance. This is without them even seeing my heels. I saw an opportunity to lunge for something new, so I acted as if I was actually gay. This time I played the role as the "gay male friend". "Yeah, but I'm not looking for anybody tonight" I replied back at their questions. They proceeded to point out some guys in the lounge they thought I would make a good match with. They did this totally respectfully, without any trace of offensiveness or disrespect. It did make me feel a bit uncomfortable to be honest, but I pressed onwards. I just shunned it off, "I'm just out to be social and have a good time". They replied, "so you get it" I remembered the times I had seen straight women french kissing gay men. So I decided to bring this topic up. Both asked "why would a straight girl have sex with a gay man?" My response was , "because it's fun without any accountability afterwards" The brunette proceeded to High Five me, indicating she understood. The blonde was a little confused still, but eventually warmed up to the idea. I could tell by the amount of physical attraction I was getting from her. She didn't mind me flirting with her: touching my foot against her leg, touching and holding her knee, putting her hand on my leg, etc. So there I was, this allegedly gay man who hadn't even revealed his high heels yet. Naturally, I had to bring the heels up. "i can't believe you are pulling off those pointies" I said to the blonde. She took off her shoe and held it up as it was a drink. "What size are you?" I asked. "Size 10" she replied. "Almost the same size! We could trade if you were a little smaller. My heels are a size 11" I said. Both of their eyes widened and when they saw my heels, they fell in love. The brunette was immediately smitten, "I love it" as was the blonde. Soon, not only did I have them rubbing my legs and rubbing my heels, but they were touching my arms, thighs, and chest. It was pure bliss. I should be put in jail for what I got away with. I'm not advocating going out to pretend that you are gay so you can get close to women while wearing heels and shorts, but I had to try it once in my life. The experience was amazing. I had an instant license to touch these girls like a meat starved Pit Bull who hasn't been fed in the desert. There was no sexual threat since they thought I was homosexual, therefore they let me get away with "murder". I knew that other girls in the bar would be watching my interaction with these girls, so when it was time for them to leave, I had all the other girls "primed" by my social proof with the two girls. Meeting new girls afterwards was like slicing a hot knife through warm butter. There were 3 other girls I talked to that night in which conversations and attraction just fell into my lap. One girl seriously wants me to wear pumps when we go out. She complained that I should get a new chest wax job too. By the way, with that girl, I didn't even ask for her number verbally. There was just this moment in time, a moment of silence and all I did was hand her my cell phone with a blank name and number on it. She filled it out with her info and I sent her a text right on the spot. I asked to see her phone to confirm the number was real, which it was. Then she gave me her cell and asked me to enter my info in. In addition to her gorgeous blonde hair, she was wearing Balenciaga heels! Woot! The night was a great success overall. I left with 4 phone numbers. The Great Gay Social Experiment was definitely the highlight of the evening. Both of those girls volunteered their numbers to me and insisted we hang out again. I said, "sure as long as we all wear shorts and pumps". They agreed. Only time will tell how far I decide to work this. As long as it's just me and the girls, I'm good. If they ever try and bring other gay men into the scene, I'll just find an excuse to leave. Eventually my authentic heterosexual self will come out, so I'll have to figure out a way to eject from the scene permanently and leave them better off than when I first found them. Lets see what's in store for the future! Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
Maximilian Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Nice! Always a pleasure reading about your adventures in the Big Apple.
JeffB Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Hey, kneehighs! That was quite an interesting social experiment you conducted. I found your latest adventure very interesting indeed. Thanks for sharing! I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
Bubba136 Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Have you no shame, KH? Just imagine their surprise and confusion when they "Discover" that your sexuality is not what they thought? It might be akin to, and every bit as surprising as, the scene in "Crock Dundee' when he reaches up under the skirt....."He's a bloke!" comment....... (Another fall-out position could be when the girls discover that they're really a "social experiment"??? albeit taking advantage of stereotypical imaging and behavior -- it is so cleaver-- and so productive. Congratulations ) Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
kneehighs Posted April 4, 2010 Author Posted April 4, 2010 ... (Another fall-out position could be when the girls discover that they're really a "social experiment"??? albeit taking advantage of stereotypical imaging and behavior -- it is so cleaver-- and so productive. Congratulations ) Yep! It would be nice if I could create some kind of "punch line" to this and make the whole experience humorous. Time will tell. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
LovesHiHeels Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Sounds like you had a good night out. But don,t you think it might of been a good idea to tell the girls that just because a bloke is wearing heels or crossdressed that they may not be gay.
tiffany Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 I wish I had the courage to go out dressed as you do. Your stories sound amazing and so much fun!
Bootking Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Remarkable, truly remarkable! But kneehighs, you did hit on a serious truth that I knew from a former girlfriend. She would go to gay bars as she would not be "hit on" there - it was a safe place! Thus, the "gay" thing did disarm the women! Voila!!! It's all about the heel!
danielp6406 Posted April 4, 2010 Posted April 4, 2010 Greetings kneehighs :-) What an amazing "experiment" it was ! (As long the girls don't know they were part of it...) Next time you meet these girls you will tell them that you are not gay and they won't believe you. Maybe you should have tell them before leaving ? (This way, you would be able to really "go out" with them...Now you can't...)
roniheels Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 Kneehighs ... Wonderful outing of yours and I am happy for you for the night you had with the young ladies. I had a similar experience some time ago that I shared in a post where I went out one summer's night into our "Old Towne" part of our city while wearing a pair of platforms with 6.5" high heels. Two young women came over to my table in an outdoor cafe and commented on my high heels and we conversed comfortably about high heels and other subjects for some time. They even invited me to join them at a club they were going to, even with our obvious age differences. Even though they never asked me if I was gay, with all of the questions they asked me about my high heels and wearing them in public, I've always wondered if at least the thought didn't cross their mind.
kneehighs Posted April 6, 2010 Author Posted April 6, 2010 Sounds like you had a good night out. But don,t you think it might of been a good idea to tell the girls that just because a bloke is wearing heels or crossdressed that they may not be gay. They falsely assumed I was gay before seeing my heels. Remarkable, truly remarkable! But kneehighs, you did hit on a serious truth that I knew from a former girlfriend. She would go to gay bars as she would not be "hit on" there - it was a safe place! Thus, the "gay" thing did disarm the women! Voila!!! It's exactly what I expected would happen. In the same way the being gay disarms many women, a man in heels also disarms some women as well. Greetings kneehighs :-) What an amazing "experiment" it was ! (As long the girls don't know they were part of it...) Next time you meet these girls you will tell them that you are not gay and they won't believe you. Maybe you should have tell them before leaving ? (This way, you would be able to really "go out" with them...Now you can't...) I wouldn't be so quick to conclude they won't believe me when I tell them I'm straight because I'll do it so congruently, they won't be able to argue with me. I'll say it not only with my body language, but my voice tone, voice pitch, voice volume and conversational pace. Besides, to me, it doesn't matter if it works out with these girls or not. I have more than enough girls circulating in my life right now than I have time or money to spend on. So I'm more at a stage of disqualifying girls than I am of weakly trying to bring them into my life. Kneehighs ... Wonderful outing of yours and I am happy for you for the night you had with the young ladies. I had a similar experience some time ago that I shared in a post where I went out one summer's night into our "Old Towne" part of our city while wearing a pair of platforms with 6.5" high heels. Two young women came over to my table in an outdoor cafe and commented on my high heels and we conversed comfortably about high heels and other subjects for some time. They even invited me to join them at a club they were going to, even with our obvious age differences. Even though they never asked me if I was gay, with all of the questions they asked me about my high heels and wearing them in public, I've always wondered if at least the thought didn't cross their mind. Maybe you were just an attractive guy in their minds! Your life experience that comes with your age most likely makes you confident (especially when compared to a younger girl) and a quality individual worth connecting with. And confidence is something women are immediately attracted to. I think the heels are a great conversational piece "ice breaker". With Heel-D on a recent trip to London, some girl initiated a conversation with us using the high heels as the "ice breaker". It's happened numerous times when I've been out alone too. How you choose to personally respond to that ice breaker is up to you! Heels really aren't a deal breaker with girls. The deal breaking part comes from guys lacking a basic execution of elementary male/female attraction principles. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
kikepa Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 You sly devil, you... Those who really care about us don't make a fuss about what we wear. Those who make a fuss about what we wear really don't care about us.
roniheels Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Quote from kneehighs: "Heels really aren't a deal breaker with girls. The deal breaking part comes from guys lacking a basic execution of elementary male/female attraction principles." Kneehighs ... I agree with you whole-heartedly. When I first started wearing high heels in public and a woman would make a comment, sometimes I would get a little flustered and maybe not even respond. Now, after heeling in public for some time now and on a regular basis, when a woman makes a comment, I take a breath and calmly respond to her question or remarks. The feedback from that has always been positive.
Dawn HH Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Kneehighs:-) You certainly like to live dangerously. Be careful that it doesn't backfire and bite you in the behind. Remember that what goes around comes around and not always the way that you think it will. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
Thighboots2 Posted April 7, 2010 Posted April 7, 2010 Kneehighs:-) You certainly like to live dangerously. Snip.... I don't really see KH as living dangerously, he knows his turf well, dresses appropriately for the time of day and occasion. Basically he is practicing what he preaches and is having a hell of a time doing it. This is the real secret - right look, right place, right time. If you went to the Rocky Horror show, a man in heels, skirt etc is expected rather than odd, in fact if you didn't dress up in some way it would certainly be out of place. So many members wail about wanting to wear their heels, yet do nothing about it. KH is a superb example of freedom of expression through fashion. The girls love a guy who shows this as there is common ground for conversation - no macho rubbish. A guy doing this is IMHO very in touch with his feminine side and that is often mistaken for being gay. KH is a wolf in sheeps clothing and is highly successful in being so. Others should take note and do likewise. Admittedly it really helps living in a cosmopolitan city, but those who do should take full advantage of it, the rewards it can bring, and stop moaning. Keep enjoying yourself KH, the less that do as you do, means little competition for you. Simon. Are you confusing me with someone who gives a damn?
kneehighs Posted April 9, 2010 Author Posted April 9, 2010 For a quick day time diversion, I thought I'd update what I did last night. Wore a women's Mango blazer (form fits the arms, slims the body for those that want to know), sleeves rolled up, white Zara tunic with tic/tac/toe design on it, dark jeans, 4.5" Nine West cone heels. 2d time out with girl. We started with dinner by the High Line Park. Walked around a bit. She noticed the heels and casually mentioned, "are those some feminine heels there?" "Not really, I don't think about it to be honest," I replied. She kept looking at them and admitted to feeling that it was "adorable" how I was wearing heels. Wound up booking a hotel room for the night in the Meat Packing District. Quite the spontaneous story of attraction and adventure at it's best. The key was that my frame of self-acceptance/confidence was stronger than her frame of doubt/fear of how to respond to the unknown. Thus, she adopted my frame of "it's no big deal." My feelings lead her feelings. In a social setting with women, just act as if you are accustomed to the additional social pressure wearing heels creates and behave as if you are unaffected by it. The fact that you are able to show a girl that you remain strong despite what could theoretically weaken you socially is attractive to a woman. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
Dawn HH Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Kneehighs:-) Great outing and a great concept for you. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
Bubba136 Posted April 10, 2010 Posted April 10, 2010 .... Quite the spontaneous story of attraction and adventure at it's best. The key was that my frame of self-acceptance/confidence was stronger than her frame of doubt/fear of how to respond to the unknown. Thus, she adopted my frame of "it's no big deal." My feelings lead her feelings. In a social setting with women, just act as if you are accustomed to the additional social pressure wearing heels creates and behave as if you are unaffected by it. The fact that you are able to show a girl that you remain strong despite what could theoretically weaken you socially is attractive to a woman. You are SOOOOOOOOO correct. your self-acceptance/confidence was stronger than her frame of doubt/fear--------- Ah, to have discovered this part of the "secret" while still so young...... Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
kneehighs Posted April 12, 2010 Author Posted April 12, 2010 First date last night. We scheduled to meet at 7:30 and when I arrived at the lounge she was standing in front of the lounge on the sidewalk waiting for me. I could literally feel her eyes blazing craters up and down my body as I approached her. She was sizing me up. "A blazer (she touched my blazer) and jeans...." As soon as her eyes caught my heels, she said something like, "And heels too??" Naturally, there had to be an audience of about 6 people watching our interaction. I was on the spot. 1 of those people was the bartender who I have a positive history of rapport with. We looked at each other and without even addressing the girl's curiosity about my heels, I said to the bartender, "Hey man! We're here to grab a table." "Cool, come on in" he said. At this time, I patted the girl on the small of her back and said, "Go on in." When inside I said, "let's go to the back to get a table." She actually stopped at the bar in the front shortly after (test again) and motioned as if she was going to sit at the bar. I replied, "No, let's sit at a table, there's some really comfortable pillows and couches and great ambiance in the back." I'm not going to go into all the details of the rest of the night, but it did end well, at 3:15 am. She wound up texting me first today, reaching out to say thanks for last night. The moral of the story that I want to emphasize here is frame control. I ignored her knee jerk reaction to create a false sense of importance around my heels from the very get go. It may have been newsworthy to her, but that doesn't mean she couldn't think about it after she'd learned more about me. Imagine what would have happened if I had allowed her knee jerk reaction of fear/surprise at my heels to define the mood of our interaction beginning with the point of first impression? Ultimately, heels are like sex, "no big deal." Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
Bubba136 Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 The moral of the story that I want to emphasize here is frame control. I ignored her knee jerk reaction to create a false sense of importance around my heels from the very get go. It may have been newsworthy to her, but that doesn't mean she couldn't think about it after she'd learned more about me. Imagine what would have happened if I had allowed her knee jerk reaction of fear/surprise at my heels to define the mood of our interaction beginning with the point of first impression? Ultimately, heels are like sex, "no big deal." This is a very important lesson. It's akin to walking through a mall wearing heels and reacting to people's reactions.....or, as my old dad used to tell me "act like you belong there and no one will question if you do or not..... So, thanks once again KH!....I'm sure more than one aspiring public heels wearer will take this lesson to heart and be more comfortable and wiser for it. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
Thighbootguy Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 or, as my old dad used to tell me "act like you belong there and no one will question if you do or not..... Sounds like you had a very wise father. I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.
JeffB Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 This is a very important lesson. It's akin to walking through a mall wearing heels and reacting to people's reactions.....or, as my old dad used to tell me "act like you belong there and no one will question if you do or not..... Darn good advice which I follow all the time when out and about! I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
roniheels Posted April 12, 2010 Posted April 12, 2010 Kneehighs ... Congratulations on a successful evening. I had a similar experience with a date one evening where I just told her of my wearing women's high heels in public, and she insisted on ending the date. It is always nice to hear someone who meets a woman that is positive concerning a man wearing high heels. Bubba ... Your dad was a wise man and that philosophy can definitely apply to many situations.
kneehighs Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 To go further into frame control in the context of Saturday night, the girl asked me the following question, "So why don't you have a girlfriend?" Do you see how she was trying to set up the frame here to test me? It was a loaded question designed to put me in a corner. Somehow she wanted me to honestly answer that question yet still demonstrate that I was an attractive potential suitor to her. Fortunately, I'm a bit smarter than that now and answered her with my own question, "I think the real issue is why don't you have a boyfriend?" When I asked this question, I asked with confidence, fully expecting an answer from her. EDIT: another frame she tried to set up revolved around sex when she said, "I'm not sleeping with you tonight." "You brought up the topic, not me." I didn't try and logically convince her it was okay to have sex with me on our first date (it was not a blind date btw), I countered with a brief statement that made it seem like she was the one interested in sex and moved the conversation on from there. DOUBLE EDIT: I asked her ,"so beauty in my life is common. In fact, in it of itself, it's boring. But people with a great attitude, with irreplaceable traits, with irreplaceable character are rare and worth working to keep around. What about you makes you irreplaceable?" Do you see my frame control here? It reframed our interaction to imply I was the selector, not her. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game.
Dawn HH Posted April 14, 2010 Posted April 14, 2010 Kneehighs:-) You really know how to play the game without letting any girl take advantage of any situation and giving them the knowledge that you are calling the shots to the direction in which you want to go. You certainly have the talent to steer any situation to your advantage. I take my hat off to you, my friend. Or as a gambler would say, "You must know when to hold them or when to fold them". Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
Bubba136 Posted April 14, 2010 Posted April 14, 2010 To go further into frame control in the context of Saturday night, the girl asked me the following question, "So why don't you have a girlfriend?" Do you see how she was trying to set up the frame here to test me? It was a loaded question designed to put me in a corner. Somehow she wanted me to honestly answer that question yet still demonstrate that I was an attractive potential suitor to her. Fortunately, I'm a bit smarter than that now and answered her with my own question, "I think the real issue is why don't you have a boyfriend?" When I asked this question, I asked with confidence, fully expecting an answer from her. EDIT: another frame she tried to set up revolved around sex when she said, "I'm not sleeping with you tonight." "You brought up the topic, not me." I didn't try and logically convince her it was okay to have sex with me on our first date (it was not a blind date btw), I countered with a brief statement that made it seem like she was the one interested in sex and moved the conversation on from there. DOUBLE EDIT: I asked her ,"so beauty in my life is common. In fact, in it of itself, it's boring. But people with a great attitude, with irreplaceable traits, with irreplaceable character are rare and worth working to keep around. What about you makes you irreplaceable?" Do you see my frame control here? It reframed our interaction to imply I was the selector, not her. Judging from the way that "men in heat (and, thats 96% of them)" pursue females these days, the entire female species is convinced that they are the ones deciding what is going to happen, when and how much. Most are so used to having their "choice" of many," that not being in "selection mode" really disarming them and creating confusion in their minds. I would bet the woman you were with began planning her strategy even before she walked out the door to meet you. And, your slight altering of what should have been the normal path to her decision of "what next" for you, confused and rattled her to a degree that she was totally out of cinc. Which, no doubt, caused her to reevaluate her tactics and take her decision on a completely different and entirely truthful (and, perhaps, not often used) criteria. Well done.... Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
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