Is It A Normal Thing To Worry About People Looking At Our Feet?

[Curt]

I worry about it sometimes. But I think women like that we take the time to wear sexy shoes. I was high-fived twice last month by women for wearing shoes they really loved. After that I know that some will love the shoes and some will hate them. For now on, I'm going to wear the shoes because I like them, and if others like them too, then that's great! Lately I've beeen asked for fashion advice from women. I guess I owe that to you guys!

[bluejay]

Right on Pumpcat. I will talk about heels with women any day and I have done so. I have had women ask me for my opinion on what they are wearing and how their shoes go with their ensemble. I'm very happy to oblige! Happy Heeling, bluejay

[Shafted]

It isn't just the shoes they are responding to . It's the whole package.

[Heelster]

I was at a two day event this week that was attended mostly by women. On the second day, I had two women inquire with me about my jeans. They wanted to know where I found them. Seems they were discussing the baggy crappy fitting jeans their husbands had been buying, and how crappy their guys looked in these jeans along with untied basketball shoes and baggy NFL/MLB T-shirts. I told them my jeans were a size 11 Arizona low rise flared cut jeans. They didn't inquire about my boots as they were a standard western boot with about a 1 - 3/4" heel. It dawned on them about two minutes later that I was wearing womens jeans, and that I was not wearing boxers underneath them. I got the impression these women are going to be trying to get their husbands some new wardrobe items real soon.

[HappyinHeels]

pumpcat, It should be expected that people will look at your feet if you're wearing something other than flip-flops, tennis shoes, or any of the boring styles that dominate men's footwear. I think anyone who has taken the time to take care of their feet and put on nice-looking footwear will have their feet noticed. This is evermore true when, as Shafted notes, people are reacting to the whole package. Keep in mind something though: do what the women do. That is they wear what is comfortable and stylish and what THEY want to wear and NOT what they think men want them to wear. Wear the shoes of your choice solely based upon your own desires.

HappyinHeels

[Curt]

Well said! Women don't give a damn about what men want them to wear. And men seem to cave in when our women give us a hard time on our clothes choices. But keep in mind that we are wearing shoes that society says are womens shoes. How does it work that way? Men are expected to wear flat shoes, and if he wears heels, he is treated like a freak. But women can wear flats or heels, and no problem. My exwife wore guys shoes all the time because her feet were very wide and had bad bunnions. She never thought of it as weird buying guys clothes and shoes. But she never gave me a hard time wearing heels. Mind you, I never got into wearing high heel pumps and skinny heel boots at that point. But I wore a pair of 70s platform boots to death! So much so that they were unrepairable. She had three pairs of heels, one with 2" heels she was forced to wear to work when important people came in, one pair of chunky heel boots with 4" heels. She wore them until she took a bad fall on the subway plkatform, and 3, a pair of strappy slingbacks that she coulnt walk in. She never threw them out because I think that would hit her ego in a bad way. When we split, I should of took thoes shoes. We were the same shoe size. I think women hate ti wear heeels because they are expected to wear them to bee professional. And we have to wear lame shoes that we are expected to wear. I might be way off base,but I think women are confused that we like to wear heels when they hate to wear themn themselves, and we aren't even forced to wear them. Sorry for the long post. If I didn't start this thread, I wouldn't mess up someone elses topic going off topic.

[Alexis Hill]

Most people are lazy when it comes to dressing so they respect people who still seem to care. As many options as women have the typical casual supper dress is tank top/cami, shorts, and flip flops. And men usually shirt, baggy shorts, and sneakers or flip flops. So anything other then that probably will draw attention. Sometimes good and sometimes bad.

[Histiletto]

I have to go along with HappyinHeels and Shafted, about wearing the heels you desire because they are part of your whole package. As men who have found to their joy - the exquisiteness of wearing heels, we may seem a bit fanatic under the present circumstances, but any one that has been denied the satisfaction of their desires due to society's unjust standards and rules, will in deed be more excited when they indulge in that which they have long awaited. Now, the idea of men in heels should not be a matter of any such notice, especially in a supposed free society. Heels are just other choices of footwear and the individual mind has its own perspectives. Trying to force or bully one to think or be the same way as another or a group is actually invading the sanctity of personal agency. Society has probably been intruding into individual spaces while they are in a public venue since civilization began, which has made it become a commonplace procedure, but it is still wrong. This status quo hasn't terminated the need for the acknowledgement of and adherence to the principles of personal choice. I know! You're the choir, but I still wanted to vent some of my frustrations concerning our approach to wearing heels. Guys will keep on being put down for wearing heels as long as we don't show our desire to wear them openly. Yes, we are going to be seen as fanatics, socially maladjusted, and/or other derogatory labels, but it won't change any other way. Not to harp on the obvious, but women have more freedoms, because many women stood up and made the difference. Their achievements came under much social scrutiny and conflict. They still have things that need rectifying and they haven't turned in the towel yet, but they got going. If you think gender has anything to do with their status, then femininity is the more dominant and the "man card" (masculinity) is a crutch to wimp out.

[tallguyinheels]

I can't count how many times that I worried about others "noticing" my unusual footwear whe I started wearing heels many years ago - usually with long slacks or jeans so that most the time you didn't have much to see anyway. After a while you reach the revelation that most don't see or don't notice and that infitessimal few that do don't say anything anyway. One thing I learned is to not appologize or feel guilty - embrass the moment - raise your cuff, and ask, "How do you like them?" - at worst you'll get an "Well each to his own."

[Pierre1961]

That's very well said ! 

[nzfreestyler]

I welcome people looking at my feet !

My high heels give me the power. It took me some time (years) to learn and then embrace this fact.

High heels weren't made to be hidden !

[Pumped]

On 6/22/2013 at 2:26 AM, Heelster said:

I was at a two day event this week that was attended mostly by women. On the second day, I had two women inquire with me about my jeans. They wanted to know where I found them. Seems they were discussing the baggy crappy fitting jeans their husbands had been buying, and how crappy their guys looked in these jeans along with untied basketball shoes and baggy NFL/MLB T-shirts. I told them my jeans were a size 11 Arizona low rise flared cut jeans. They didn't inquire about my boots as they were a standard western boot with about a 1 - 3/4" heel. It dawned on them about two minutes later that I was wearing womens jeans, and that I was not wearing boxers underneath them. I got the impression these women are going to be trying to get their husbands some new wardrobe items real soon.

My wife likes my choice of jeans, they are men's, but they "fit" and are not baggy, many are stretch and snug fitting. My wife give my buddy a hard time about his jeans as he wears them 2-3 sizes too large and they are baggy on him. Kinda freaks my wife out.

[SF]

It really does not bother me if someone looks at my feet / heels.  Face it, if a guy goes out in public wearing gals shoes / sandals they ARE going to look at (and maybe comment) about your feet / shoes.  After all, you are in public!  For me, I just enjoy wearing heels, I don't do it for attention or any other reason other than enjoyment and comfort.  

The best (worse) part, most folks don't notice, care or comment.  Those that do mostly comment positively, which is nice, and from there a pleasant conversation usually begins...

Have fun.....   sf

[Cali]

I wear my 4+ inch heels with shorts for about 6-8 months during the summer. So I expect that people will notice. Funny thing, must people don't. I don't wear them for attention, I wear them for pain relief. I don't care what people think, except I want them to "like" what I am wearing (even envy).  I wear a lot of designer heels. At work I have women tell me that "you always have the nice shoes", "those are really nice", or they wish they could walk in heels like I do.

[caultron]

9 minutes ago, Cali said:

I wear my 4+ inch heels with shorts for about 6-8 months during the summer. So I expect that people will notice. Funny thing, must people don't. I don't wear them for attention, I wear them for pain relief. I don't care what people think, except I want them to "like" what I am wearing (even envy).  I wear a lot of designer heels. At work I have women tell me that "you always have the nice shoes", "those are really nice", or they wish they could walk in heels like I do.

What kind of pain do 4+ inch heels relieve for you?

At one time I considered telling people that I wore heels because relived a pinched nerve in my back, but I never went through with that. Instead I tell anyone who asks that I always wondered what they were like, or that I just have fun being goofy.

And what about the other 4-6 months? Do you still wear heels but with something else, or do you stop wearing heels too?

[Hansi1973]

At the beginning I was afraid, someone could notice the heels under long pants and might point and laugh about me. 

And yes - my self confidence was very weak. 

It took it's time, the more experience I gathered, the more self confidence I achieved. 

Nowadays I do not hide my heels anymore. I am confident enough, to react on reactions. And I am proud, to show, that men - beside dragshows, theatre, Television, events, etc.  - are able to walk on heels. Not for entertainment or any social message - just for self expression and alternative fashion. 

Ten years ago I was afraid someone could talk to me about the shoes - even in a shop. Today - and also based on several experiences we made during our "Forum meetings" - I really love the discussions with  (open minded) people! 

They often totally agree that even High heels are "only shoes" and that "gender equality" is not a one way road. 

Just two days ago I had a phantastic conversation in an outlet store  (report will follow!), where I tried and bought new pumps / court shoes. 

Those discussions are "balm for the soul"!

Today my female colleagues are asking me for advise, if it comes to shoes and other fashion items.

I feel more free and accepted, than I could ever dreamed before!

 

 

 

[Pierre1961]

Congratulations! I wish I could reach that self confidence you have 

[Cali]

6 hours ago, caultron said:

What kind of pain do 4+ inch heels relieve for you?

At one time I considered telling people that I wore heels because relived a pinched nerve in my back, but I never went through with that. Instead I tell anyone who asks that I always wondered what they were like, or that I just have fun being goofy.

And what about the other 4-6 months? Do you still wear heels but with something else, or do you stop wearing heels too?

I had a major injury that drove my femur into my iliac before twisting me apart and doing more nasty things to other parts of my body. 4 inch + heels stops bone-on-bone rubbing. Pain has been a part of my life since. By chance I found out that 4 inch rise great reduces this pain

I don't wear shorts in the winter, but I still wear heels all year round, just with long pants in the fall winter early spring months. Then its mostly boots and booties. (There is a group of "boot" fans at work that always ask me to pull up my pants legs so they can see my boots.) Summer its mostly open-toe sandals/wedges so I can show off my nails.

Like this morning I drove to a lake in my mules, changed to water shoes for a kayaking trip, back to mules/heels to drive home. But now I'm putting running shoes on so I can do roofing.  Surprisingly 4 inch heels and roofs don't work together.

[caultron]

Sorry about your injury.

Did you wear heels at all before being injured?

I, too, occasionally have people say they like, "I like your heels," or, "Where did you get those?" or, "You walk very well in those." And I truly appreciate the acceptance.

[Cali]

In the late 70's early 80's I had a pair of shooties with a 3 inch heel. Wore those shoes to threads.

I switched to women's shoes in about 2010 because they fit better and at that time I had 1.5 to 2.5 inch heels. Mostly boots and booties. I had a medical need to raise my heel 4 inches. Tried heels because I couldn't be unbalanced. After 3 + months I notice I wasn't in constant pain. I notice when I could go back to no heels the pain came back. So I wear heels or take pain killers, that simple.