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Hi all, After a long time of meaning to post but never executing, I thought I'd just start a new threat to document my adventures in heels. Nothing complicated, so dont expect wonders, but just sharing pictures and this and that. Our neighborhood is pretty progressive, and over the years, they've gotten to know me in heels. This past week, we had some cooler weather at first, so my wife and I were at the local brewery in booties: That said, boot season is pretty much over in this part of Texas, and towards the middle of the week it was already sandals weather again, so we wore these beauties from Jessica Simpson. Clearly, I need to work on a better angle, but I don't like making a scene taking pictures, so under the table / bar snapshots are mostly what happens... Case in point, this was yesterday's choice.8 points
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First may I say that Gige's quick progression amazes me, he has accomplished more in about a year than I have in ten years. And, like you both have said, making progress is a "vicious cycle" indeed. My Mom used to tell me: "you are your own worst enemy...." I think many of us are under the impression (false one) that the rest of the world is waiting outside our door for us to venture out in heels so they can point, laugh, criticize. While it is true people will notice, but no where to the extent we fear they will. Most are too busy to notice our footwear. And for the most part, those that notice will say nothing (another double edge sword for me anyway). I guess we make the false assumption that most others will notice our heels quickly only because we notice the shoes others are wearing. On the other hand, stumbling around in tall heels we can't handle will get us noticed. As Cali put it, you "have to read the room". Venturing out in a short skirt and fishnets will probably get you noticed also. Having negative experiences like this can be a big set back. This is why it is best to start with heels that are somewhat modest. We are nervous enough venturing out in the beginning, so this just increases the chances of stumbling or tripping, which why it is important to start out in heels that are not hard to walk in. Once comfortable/confident walking in modest heels publicly, then we can start to increase heel size and consider some slimmer heels. The only other idea I have is to venture out with a girl or guy pal that is supportive. "Confidence in numbers". I'm always looking for "heel buds" to hang out with. I would be lying if I claimed I never get nervous when out in public these days, but it is infrequent for sure.7 points
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A very simple, but true story. Attending a conference with my coworkers, I wanted to make a statement with my professional attire. I decided to wear my prized Christian Louboutin Hot Wave heels, the iconic peep-toe Hot Chick. Knowing the allure these shoes hold, I aimed to turn heads. As I sat in the lobby of the Marriott Marquis, I dangled my foot, arching it just right to create an enticing display. Many men glanced my way (dozens), but one in particular stood out. In a rush, he excitedly pointed at my shoes and exclaimed, “I have them too!” He quickly flashed his own red-bottom dress shoes, also by Louboutin, before tripping over himself and hurrying off. Later that evening, during the inevitable happy hour, I was still rocking my 130mm Hot Waves. Seated at the bar, enjoying a bourbon, I crossed my legs to showcase the heels. Off to the side, a man was staring intently, clearly captivated. I continued to flaunt the shoes, emphasizing the arch and silhouette of the 130mm heel. He was so distracted that he barely paid attention to his colleagues. Before leaving with his group, he approached me and said, “Nice Hot Chicks.” Though he got the name slightly wrong, it was clear he was enamored with the shoes. Unfortunately, it was a missed connection. I never saw him again and have no idea who he might be. Yet, with his evident interest in these rare heels, I suspect he frequents the same communities and forums as I do (HHPlace, Reddit, etc.).5 points
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Several interesting events happen this week. On Wednesday I stopped at the Post Office on the way into work. As I past a woman getting to her door she stopped and told "I just love those boots" (Impo boots with 3.8+" skinny heels) "I wish I could walk as well as you in them." That's just normal for me. It's what happen on the way out that makes this an event. When I was about 11 meters from my car, I felt something wrong...looked down and the platform had separated from the top of the shoe. Got to my car, took off the boot and drove home. Lucky, I was only 4 miles from home. Went home and changed into my Jessica Simpson faux suede knee highs. I have since glued the shoe together. I wonder how many miles I have logged in those shoes over the last 6 + years; 50?, 100?, 200? Today, was a meetings day, again had the JS knee highs (rainy/windy day). After one meeting, a woman told me she always likes walking behind me because she likes the heels I wear. We discussed shoes for a few minutes, she and another woman were fans of JS shoes. Sheepishly she confessed that she owned over 50 heels, I told her "that's ALL, I have around 100." We laughed.5 points
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This is so true! I remember the first few times I wore heels in public. I was so focused on what people might say, or what types of looks I might get, that by the end of it, I was like “wow, no one really even looked, or seemed to care at all, one way or the other”. Psychologically, I think I prepared myself too much, for negative reactions, ridicule, or even dirty looks, and when none of that happened, I realized that the whole event really wasn’t as big of a deal to everyone else, as it may have been to me. It honestly felt like all of the mental preparation and courage I summoned leading up to my finally walking in public wearing heels, was a gigantic nothing burger! In a strange way, It was sort of a let-down, almost making me feel like all of the excitement I had been building up in my own head, along with the thought that others would be ready to laugh, ridicule, point, or whatever, gave the whole thing much more importance than it actually deserved. What I got from my first experiences wearing heels in public, is that most people either, don’t care, or are not paying attention (mainly because they are probably too wrapped up in their own routines and their own distractions). I truly believe more guys would venture out in heels, if they realized that 99.8 of the “barriers” and negative reactions they expect and prepare for, or that they imagine that actually prevents them from experiencing and exploring wearing heels in public, basically come mainly from their own thoughts, and not the public/society itself. As far as reactions go, over decades of wearing heels in public, I’ve gotten maybe three or four dirty looks, maybe double that amount of looks of confusion or “double takes” (like when someone sees something, looks away, then quickly looks back, as if to say, “did I really just see what I thought I saw?), and I should add that many of those were woman, who followed it up with a kind smile! As far as comments, I’ve gotten literally dozens, from males and females alike, mostly all positive! Definitely nothing that would have ever kept me from going back out in heels again, that’s for sure. Bottom line is that most people could care less, and the ones that may notice, are mostly kindhearted people, and not as judgmental as one may think.5 points
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Thought I would share this post about a very old pair of Pleaser ankle strap pumps that I have finally decided must be put out to pasture. I couldn't say how many miles I've worn these amazingly comfortable 5 inch heels, talking Melroseplant level I'm guessing. I've re-heeled these at least 6 times. Finally blew out the sole and upper part of the vamps this last week. Surprisingly they are still easy to walk in and sturdy but still long past any visual appeal. I think these definitely paid themselves off many times.5 points
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I've been browsing this site for a long time. But after my most recent escapade I knew I'd have to share. I want to make a post detailing my history a bit as I've found other smiliar stories and experiences informative. In the meantime though I will share my boldest public outing. So the plan was simple go out in the early AM in flats. Walk to a remote area change into heels, walk around a bit. Change back, walk home. Easy. My biggest problem though is what pair of heels? I bought some bright pink mary Jane's with a slight chunky heel and a nice t bar strap. About 3 and 3/4 of an inch tall. I only intended to wear them at home because they were so blatantly feminine and bright. But they fit well and I can walk in them comfortably, they also can be walked in without being incredible loud. That is if you walk with good technique. I figured that I wouldn't even see anybody and for some reason I picked them for my walk. So I got dressed. Threw a hoodie on slipped into some old ratty sneakers grabbed my heels and head out the door. This was nerve-wracking. But I tried my best to bolster my confidence. Why would I a man be walking holding a pair of bright pink heels? Maybe my GF left them at my house and I'm dropping them off, who knows. These are the mind games I play so I don't feel so awkward about the whole thing. As I walked I ended up at a small stair set. I sat down and took off my sneakers. I slipped my heels on. I took a couple steps and they sound alright and I can walk alright. However I began hearing voices coming closer and closer. I panicked. I frantically tore my heels off and just in the nick of time I was able to get my sneakers back on and as they rounded the corner I began to walk away. At this point my mission felt fubar. For some reason there was a relatively high amount of activity for that time of night. I began to feel discouraged. I also grew paranoid that it was some kind of security and they'd follow me. Thankfully I kept walking and they didn't. I wanted to call it quits but I couldn't turn back and possibly run into whoever that was, so I kept marching forward. Again I saw a man perhaps leaving a late shift or arriving for one. Again the activity scared me. But I doubled down and kept walking. I had now made it to a large parking lot and I knew that there would be nobody there. So I found a big set of stairs sat down and put my heels on. I left my sneakers sitting there and begin to walk. If I walked either heel to toe or tried to land my foot evenly my heels weren't too loud on the concrete. I felt my confidence begin to return. I felt comfortable walking and with my jeans partly covering my feet I felt reasonable safe. So in a spur of the moment decision I decided to go back for my sneakers, but not to change back. I picked up my old sneakers and found the nearest trash can and tossed them. Now I couldn't chicken out. I'd have to walk the mile back home in heels. Well unless I wanted to do the walk of shame and walk barefooted on the wet ground. I felt relatively confident, I knew the area well and I could navigate the quiet darker places and I'd only have to risk one section on the way home. So things went smoothly, well besides the fact my feet already hurt and I was was only a quarter of the way. I couldn't change my mind now! So I was beginning to reach the tricky portion of my walk. I knew that this was a sort of choke point between two sections of town and I would be more likely to see somone there. Surprise surprise as I was thinking this I rounded the corner and a young man was walking right my way about 20 feet ahead. I had no time to panic or hide. I just kept walking. I even instinctively made eye contact and nodded but they just stared straight ahead and kept walking. I was a hooded dude in jeans and pink heels I wonder if he even noticed haha. Either way I survived and the rest of the walk was uneventful. My worst case scenario happened and it was fine. So that was my little adventure. I have more to share in the future. If any of yall got questions id love to hear them. Thanks for reading. Also I've never been very good at writing so hopefully I conveyed this story decently enough and any grammatical stuff wasn't too egregious. -Goose5 points
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Well it happened again. Another convert. Last night, a women waiting for a colleague asked me how high my boots where. She had seen me in several boots and decided to get some herself. I had my Jessica Simpson black faux suede knee highs with a 1 inch platform and 4.75 inch heel. I had plan on wearing my JS suede stilettos, but it was a drizzling all day, so as the memo states, you "don't wear suede in the rain." She had been looking at boots on-line and figure if I could wear boots with high heels, then she could too. Another high heel convert!!!5 points
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Nervous and fear 12-15 years ago. Now, I don’t give a f**k I can count on 1 hand how many negative comments I have heard in all my years. to Pebblesf point, other people are so wrapped up in there phones and staring straight ahead they don’t even notice. When someone makes eye contact DO NOT LOOK AWAY OR DOWN. Look straight back at them with a nod or a hello. I have engaged in heel and or outfit conversations as well as conversations that have nothing to do with the heels skirt or dress I am wearing. I will say from experience that 6” stilettos fishnets and a leather miniskirt will get you noticed and it certainly has gotten me noticed. I am headed to the Tampa airport and back to Chicago in about an hour and I am wearing a brown sweater dress and patchwork/color block brown and black stiletto knee high boots. you only live once and I waited to late in life to dress the way I always wanted to. I’m not hear for a long time I’m hear for a good time5 points
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There’s a men’s fashion Instagram account that keeps popping up in my feed and it’s rather interesting. Yesterday they had a post about men’s fashions becoming more feminine - specifically mentioning skinny jeans. The chap whose account it’s, and who deals in bespoke suits, was very much against this. I posted a comment saying that I thought it was time to lighten up, allow men the same degree of freedom, fun and theatricality women took for granted. I was pleasantly surprised to have 75 (and counting) likes and only one (polite) disagreement4 points
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I hear ya for sure. But, I have found/noticed that a mix of subtle "feminine gear" along with decent "masculine gear" can be a great look indeed. Just a guy, happy to be a guy, wearing a touch of "feminine gear". I find this to be a very confident/powerful look indeed. Needless to say, many guys have nice long/lean/toned builds and look great in even more feminine gear, not a look I can pull off for sure... I recently bought a few pairs of women's nike leggings/work out gear pants from a thrift store, just to get a better idea of what size would work for me, and just how I would look. I enjoy wearing them, but afraid to see an actual picture of me...Afraid I might be "overstepping", writing checks my old dad bod just cant cash!4 points
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After four days in a row of practice, I believe I am back to normal. The super cold weather has left us, at least for now, and I can stand to walk outside again. It may be that I will feel like taking some pictures again soon. It's kind of too bad I missed the last couple of weeks. I wore knee high boots to church two weeks in a row!4 points
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Well, I guess I feel that not as many folks notice our heels and boots are we once might have feared did notice! Again, I always notice footwear, so mistakenly made the assumption that most others do too. But, on the other hand, I feel that more folks notice than we are aware of. Most folks might notice but don't want to be rude or stare, and they are way too busy to deviate from their immediate missions while out and about. I might not notice folks checking out my boots intentionally, mainly because I want to give them the opportunity to look (hopefully admire) without "being caught looking/staring" by me. Generally, I can usually sense when someone is taking a second look though. For me, I know I am relaxed when out and about, when I almost forget I'm wearing boots.4 points
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Like you, I do have stilettos that I wear while working, so yes, I suppose they’re technically work boots - my favourite being a pair of lovely black suede OTK boots with 4” heels by Jean Gaborit4 points
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Undoubtedly having some supportive and, better still a high heel aficionado who can offer useful tips, hints and critique as well as enthusiasm would be wonderful. And a bit of a unicorn, I’m afraid. My heels, the ones I wear regularly, tend to be modest ones - 3 to 3.5 inch chunky heels in ankle, knee and OTK boots. I’m not so concerned about my ability to walk well in them, at that height and chunky heels to boot, it’s not hard, but would welcome fashion advice about what to wear with my boots - what style/shade of jeans, or style/colour of jumper, coat or shirt, with which pair of boots. I’m never confident of being well put together - and there is virtually no fashion advice columns for men who aspire to wear tall feminine-style boots4 points
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Thank you to all for the wonderful responses - I truly appreciate the support and kind words! As I have made known in several previous responses to other threads, had I not found this forum and read the stories of other men venturing out in heels for the first time, I do not know that I would have ever found the courage to do so myself. Given how far I have come in just about a year, it seems somewhat foolish that I did not do so earlier in my life. As I was driving home from the office in a ridiculously cute outfit I wore today, I was thinking that it is almost a year to the day when I first wore heels (boots, actually) to the office. Although ~95% of the shaft and heel were covered by long pants, I was still so nervous about doing so, and that someone would "see" my footwear and take note of what I was wearing. Then, after my work day was done, I headed out for a quick haircut and as I was waiting in the salon/barbershop, store, I was so nervous my hands were sweating. When my name was called, it was a "here goes nothing...!" moment. I was not ready to have anyone see me wearing heels at that time but, admittedly, it was a thrill knowing that I was "secretly" doing so. Now, a year later, I could not possibly care less what anyone may think as so many people, at the office and in public settings have seen me in heels, that it has become routine. I do not consider myself to be "Superman" or the like when comes to wearing heels out in public but I realize that if someone has an issue with it, oh well...not my problem. I truly do not know why I have so quickly overcome my fears of wearing heels in public. I think that once the first few times were "under my belt," so to speak, it just became easier and easier to do. Not to sound like a broken record but the words of Dr. Seuss have truly taken on a new meaning for me..."Those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind." Well, enough of my rambling...Thanks again to everyone! Richard Photo - the aforementioned "ridiculously cute" outfit for work today!4 points
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I have come to start embracing this approach. My job is a "hybrid" meaning that I can work from either home or at the office as need dictates. Right now, I do a 2-3 schedule in that I am at home on Mondays & Fridays, and at the office Tuesdays - Thursday. I find that at home, I am more inclined to "throw on whatever" and go with it rather than take any time to put together a nice outfit - it's all done in laziness. My wife has long been a proponent of the "dress for work," even at home" because it does much to promote a professional mindset. She has, understandably complained about those who show up to video meetings in bathrobes. I could not agree with you more - live up to your footwear is my approach to every outfit I put together. That which I wear MUST coordinate with my footwear or else it just will not work for me.4 points
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