Travelling in OTK boots

[Shyheels]

I just spent a week travelling around by Britain, mainly by rail, and nearly every day wearing a pair of brown suede OTK boots over skinny jeans. They were standard heels admittedly, not high heels, but still very definitely OTK boots, with ornamental lacing down the sides and straps and buckles over the instep - styling that would very definitely be regarded as feminine by society at large. Over the course of the week I passed through several big cities, several main train stations and had meals in working class pubs - some of which were busy, others of which were quiet and where patrons were more likely to notice newcomers. And not once did my choice of footwear evoke so much as a second glance. No compliments, but no censorious looks either.  In fact, my footwear choice did not seem to register with anybody at all, not the lest little bit, which is just as it should be.  I'm not out trying to attract attention or push an agenda but simply wearing a style of boot I liked, which looked nice and was suitable for where I was going and what I was doing.

I make the point not for the regular posters here, to whom this would be preaching to the choir, but for those hesitating on the sidelines, wondering what the reactions might be if oe steps out in more theatrical footwear. The answer: none.   

[flavio]

Thanks for sharing your experience.

I'm doing random heelings it's been 1.5 years now and having almost the same no-big-deal thing.

I rarely got compliments from strangers, 3 to be exact, all from men.

I've got one laugh from a girl on a group of teenagers at the street in plain daylight but not sure it was on me.

I've got stares from a right-wing radical group at a McDonalds restaurant once. No problem in the end but I know I was on their radar. I was with wife and kids so I found it threatening for them.

Anyway, I try to be careful where I go and avoid heels on small villages where I can find trouble. Don't know how it goes in England but I see you're doing the experiment

 

[Shyheels]

Sounds like another good reason to avoid McDonalds!

I think you can find trouble anywhere, and no matter what style of footwear you are wearing. But for the most part people go around in their own bubbles and they’re fairly harmless anyway

[pebblesf]

On 12/4/2023 at 3:42 AM, flavio said:

Thanks for sharing your experience.

I'm doing random heelings it's been 1.5 years now and having almost the same no-big-deal thing.

I rarely got compliments from strangers, 3 to be exact, all from men.

I've got one laugh from a girl on a group of teenagers at the street in plain daylight but not sure it was on me.

I've got stares from a right-wing radical group at a McDonalds restaurant once. No problem in the end but I know I was on their radar. I was with wife and kids so I found it threatening for them.

Anyway, I try to be careful where I go and avoid heels on small villages where I can find trouble. Don't know how it goes in England but I see you're doing the experiment

 

It's strange, but being from the US, I always asssumed that places like France and England were probably much more open and accepting to guys going against social norms like us.  Nonetheless, I rarely get any obvious reaction to my boots while traveling the US as well.  But yes, I have encountered some giggling from young girls walking near me.  Honestly can't remember the last time I got a negative/disapproving stare from anyone though.  For me, I have just made the assumption that everyone else on earth notices/hears footwear the way I do, but have learned that most folks just aren't that interested to notice...

[Cali]

Even I subdue my footwear in international locations.  I wore the booties that lost the heel recent in  Australia. A similar pair in Canada, England and Scotland.  But in Argentina and Chile I went with a 2 inch heel.

Edited December 7, 2023 by Cali

[Shyheels]

Yes, it pays to be familiar with your environments. I don't think I'd care to try wearing heels in, say, Dubai, for example, even on a layover en route from London to Australia.  Especially stilettos. There is leeway with chunky heels, but none with stilettos. I would risk it with the OTK boots I've been wearing around lately though as they come across as bohemian rather an outright challenge to gender norms.  I should add that I do not wear these as a form of compromise, but because I genuinely like the style.  After the initial rush of blood in trying heels for the first time, when five-inch stilettos thrilled with their novelty and athletic challenge, I've settled into my own style - which is chunky heeled boots of some description; clean, classic lines and almond toes, worn with jeans. And because this is my style, and I feel so comfortable with it, that in itself makes me blend into the scenery. There's nothing contrived here, no sense of provocation.

[mlroseplant]

It will be soon once again time to visit the family in Vietnam. It has been 5 years for me, thanks to the pandemic. Could I get away with wearing heels in Vietnam, at least in the city? Probably. Will I wear heels? Absolutely not. Although the time is long past when my wife has even bothered saying anything anymore, it goes without saying that she is there for the purpose of visiting her mother, not for answering stupid questions about her silly husband.

[Shyheels]

Good call, I’d say. There’s a time and a place. One does not live in a vacuum 

[Jkrenzer]

Although not boots, I have traveled to and from Brazil with 5 inch block, 1 inch square, loafers. Had no issues. 

Those shoes are long since gone.

[Puffer]

On 12/1/2023 at 5:05 AM, Shyheels said:

I just spent a week travelling around by Britain, mainly by rail, and nearly every day wearing a pair of brown suede OTK boots over skinny jeans. They were standard heels admittedly, not high heels, but still very definitely OTK boots, with ornamental lacing down the sides and straps and buckles over the instep - styling that would very definitely be regarded as feminine by society at large. ...

Very interesting, and encouraging - but a picture of the boots would be very helpful.

15 hours ago, pebblesf said:

It's strange, but being from the US, I always asssumed that places like France and England were probably much more open and accepting to guys going against social norms like us.  Nonetheless, I rarely get any obvious reaction to my boots while traveling the US as well.  ...

As an outsider, I would regard the US as the land of extremes: very strait-laced in many respects but surprisingly liberal and relaxed in others.   Just look at 'People of Walmart' to see some examples of conduct or appearance that would almost never be seen in the UK.   I'm not judging either country, just expressing an impression gained from my life in the UK and my visits to the US.

[Bubba136]

When visiting a friend in a local hospital last week, I encountered a male nurse as he was exiting my friend’s room.  Even though he was wearing his hospital scrubs I noticed that he was wearing female nurses shoes with about 2 1\2 “ wedge heels.  Later, when I was leaving, I noticed a well dressed man coming into the hospital wearing a pair of black patent ballerina flats with little black bows on the vamp.  I wonder if he noticed that I was wearing a pair of black penny loafers with 4” heels?

 

[Shyheels]

Wouldn’t it be funny if, as we talk about so few people noticing our heels, we ourselves fail to notice anybody else’s ?

[Bubba136]

Interesting comment, skyheels.  For years I’ve had the practice of noticing the shoes people wear, especially women.  When encountering a person that has attracted my notice, I usually glance from head to toe at the way they are dressed.  I am quite sure that I would notice any man wearing women’s shoes, as it was in this case.

[Shyheels]

1 hour ago, Bubba136 said:

Interesting comment, skyheels.  For years I’ve had the practice of noticing the shoes people wear, especially women.  When encountering a person that has attracted my notice, I usually glance from head to toe at the way they are dressed.  I am quite sure that I would notice any man wearing women’s shoes, as it was in this case.

Yes, I believe you would - and do. Indeed it was your comment about noticing a couple of guys in heels at the hospital that prompted my thought. I tend to notice these sorts of things too, but how many other heel wearers are wrapped in their bubbles, so preoccupied with looking at the eyes of others that they noticing nothing else about the people around them?

[Jkrenzer]

47 minutes ago, Shyheels said:

but how many other heel wearers are wrapped in their bubbles, so preoccupied with looking at the eyes of others that they noticing nothing else about the people around them?

I bet most, my ears are tuned to heels. I hear them I'm looking. It's a side effect of the high heel gene. I'm ultra attracted to great legs and heels do make a difference. The most beautiful woman, dressed to kill in flats  simply not working in my book. Shoes not jewelry make every outfit, formal, dressy or even casual. 

[Shyheels]

For me heels are an accessory - some I like, some I don’t. In terms of observing those around me, I’m much more likely to notice faces, the colours people wear, their overall look and style, with a preference for the bohemian over the classic and formal. I could as easily fall for someone in hiking boots as I could in OTK boots with four inch heels

[flavio]

On 12/4/2023 at 4:16 PM, Shyheels said:

Sounds like another good reason to avoid McDonalds!

I think you can find trouble anywhere, and no matter what style of footwear you are wearing. But for the most part people go around in their own bubbles and they’re fairly harmless anyway

 

On 12/6/2023 at 9:05 PM, pebblesf said:

It's strange, but being from the US, I always asssumed that places like France and England were probably much more open and accepting to guys going against social norms like us.  Nonetheless, I rarely get any obvious reaction to my boots while traveling the US as well.  But yes, I have encountered some giggling from young girls walking near me.  Honestly can't remember the last time I got a negative/disapproving stare from anyone though.  For me, I have just made the assumption that everyone else on earth notices/hears footwear the way I do, but have learned that most folks just aren't that interested to notice...

I was born and raised in Brazil before moving to France in 2014.

I had the same "Europeans are more openminded than Brazilians" mindset and I was wrong. I learnt that you'll find all kinds of stupid people anywhere in the world. The way politics or laws work are one thing but the way people behave is always a  liberal/conservative variable ratio. Even in the most unfriendly countries you will find smart people.

 

On 12/7/2023 at 7:02 AM, Shyheels said:

Yes, it pays to be familiar with your environments. I don't think I'd care to try wearing heels in, say, Dubai, for example, even on a layover en route from London to Australia.  Especially stilettos. There is leeway with chunky heels, but none with stilettos. I would risk it with the OTK boots I've been wearing around lately though as they come across as bohemian rather an outright challenge to gender norms.  I should add that I do not wear these as a form of compromise, but because I genuinely like the style.  After the initial rush of blood in trying heels for the first time, when five-inch stilettos thrilled with their novelty and athletic challenge, I've settled into my own style - which is chunky heeled boots of some description; clean, classic lines and almond toes, worn with jeans. And because this is my style, and I feel so comfortable with it, that in itself makes me blend into the scenery. There's nothing contrived here, no sense of provocation.

I've used block heels (3 inch max) on planes but my flying shoes more recently are 2 inch clogs. I like to have easy to stepin/out shoes when in airports security and planes. Practical.

22 hours ago, Jkrenzer said:

Although not boots, I have traveled to and from Brazil with 5 inch block, 1 inch square, loafers. Had no issues. 

Those shoes are long since gone.

I still have to do a real heel experience in my origin country. The max I did there was 2 inch clogs.

20 hours ago, Bubba136 said:

Interesting comment, skyheels.  For years I’ve had the practice of noticing the shoes people wear, especially women.  When encountering a person that has attracted my notice, I usually glance from head to toe at the way they are dressed.  I am quite sure that I would notice any man wearing women’s shoes, as it was in this case.

Same. Men, women and a mix of them always get my attention when wearing pretty footwear.

 

[Gige]

On 12/4/2023 at 2:42 AM, flavio said:

Thanks for sharing your experience.

I'm doing random heelings it's been 1.5 years now and having almost the same no-big-deal thing.

I rarely got compliments from strangers, 3 to be exact, all from men.

I've got one laugh from a girl on a group of teenagers at the street in plain daylight but not sure it was on me.

I've got stares from a right-wing radical group at a McDonalds restaurant once. No problem in the end but I know I was on their radar. I was with wife and kids so I found it threatening for them.

Anyway, I try to be careful where I go and avoid heels on small villages where I can find trouble. Don't know how it goes in England but I see you're doing the experiment

 

Bonjour!

To date, I have had two compliments on my boots - both from women. I actually get more positive compliments on the color of my fingernails than all else and again, all from women. I am, sadly, like you, careful as to where I wear my heels out in public as more rural places may be very unwelcoming not only of "outsiders" but those who are outsiders who are somehow "different." I have no doubt that if some places were unwelcoming to a man wearing heels, the same lack of respect would be extended to gay, transgender, or other similar individuals. That is why, like others, public heeling has to be done with a sense of caution when needed, even thought this should never be the case.

Merci!

G 

[HappyinHeels]

Part of the privilege of participating in this forum is getting the chance to enjoy some linguistic bliss from our United Kingdom members. A word like censorious just isn't used among ordinary people and the only place one might encounter it would be in print perhaps in an opinion piece or an online review of a particular venue. Nevertheless such words quench my thirst for more such descriptive morsels. A tip,of the hat, or the Stetson, to those who still speak the language as it was probably always intended. Remain calm and carry on. HJinH

[Shyheels]

1 hour ago, HappyinHeels said:

Part of the privilege of participating in this forum is getting the chance to enjoy some linguistic bliss from our United Kingdom members. A word like censorious just isn't used among ordinary people and the only place one might encounter it would be in print perhaps in an opinion piece or an online review of a particular venue. Nevertheless such words quench my thirst for more such descriptive morsels. A tip,of the hat, or the Stetson, to those who still speak the language as it was probably always intended. Remain calm and carry on. HJinH

Ah yes, I'm a writer, which is an art of sorts, and words are my palette. I love the richness of the English language. Thank you!