Rockbass19 Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 So, last thursday night was my wife's birthday. Her dad and I had agreed to get some family together and go out for dinner. Now, up to this point, my wife has not been crazy about the idea of me wearing high heeled boots with my outfits. Every time I had asked if I could wear them out, she had always given me a stern "NO". That is, until last Thursday. I put on a nice black button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up just below my elbow (I do that to show off my tattoos). I wore a nice pair of Calvin Klein men's jeans. I did ask her if I could wear my heels. I was expecting her to say the usual "NO", but she instead replied "as long as they don't look too girly". This was the breakthrough I had been waiting for! So I tried on a few pairs of boots and showed them to her with my whole outfit. There were a couple pairs that she agreed would be "ok" because they weren't too obvious. However, being that several family members were attending (some being very closed-minded and judgmental), I decided that it would not be in my best interest to wear the heels that night. Instead, I asked if I could wear them on our next date night, and she agreed! I'm a happy guy right now!
SleekHeels Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 However, being that several family members were attending (some being very closed-minded and judgmental), I decided that it would not be in my best interest to wear the heels that night. Instead, I asked if I could wear them on our next date night, and she agreed! I'm a happy guy right now! I think your restraint was exactly the right thing to do in that situation. I hope you reap the rewards and you both have a fantastic next date! If you like it, wear it.
ilikekicks Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 I'm a happy guy right now! I'm glad your happy right now! Good to see someone enjoying themselves. -ILK REPEATEDLY ARGUMENTATIVE, INSULTING AND RUDE. BANNED FOR LIFE.
mtnsofheels Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Good for you , nothing like having some positive vibes for your interest! Kudos to your wife too!
Histiletto Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I too am happy for you and your wife seeming to break down the barriers that heeling gets from the social attitude right now. Sounds like a memorable date night to add with your other special occasions.
AZShoeNut Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Right on man, that is awesome! I look forward to reading about that date night. Best, Larry Life is short... Wear the bleeping shoes!
heels59 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I'm eager to hear how that works out for you. I was told it's OK to wear heels at home, but when i tried she freaked out.
Thighbootguy Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 However, being that several family members were attending (some being very closed-minded and judgmental), I decided that it would not be in my best interest to wear the heels that night. I'm eager to hear how that works out for you. I was told it's OK to wear heels at home, but when i tried she freaked out. For those occasions when heels are not appropriate, consider trying a pair of flats. Although they don't have all the style and daring that a pair of 5" stilettos have (or the pain), flats are a nice shoe for casual wear and they get almost as much attention as heels do. I currently have two pair, both from Payless. One is a tan with a relatively flat finish that are only noticed when you look for them, but the other pair are black glossy that are really noticed. I wear them with leggings and there is no attempt at hiding them. I have worn then to the same hardware store. When I walked in with the tan pair, the clerks (female) eyes went to the can of paint I was carrying, When I wore the black pair (also carrying a can of paint) here eyes went to my shoes. Flats can be fun. For those occasions when heels are not appropriate, consider trying a pair of flats. Although they don't have all the style and daring I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.
Steve63130 Posted October 29, 2014 Posted October 29, 2014 And we can discuss it in more detail at FlatHeelPlace.org, right? Just kidding! Actually I agree with you. Steve
SleekHeels Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 .... consider trying a pair of flats. Although they don't have all the style and daring Don't they? Not even over-the-knee flats? If you like it, wear it.
Histiletto Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 For the sake of discussing guys wearing heels, this forum thread has been provided. Certainly we can be just as avid about wearing flat heels even though their height description may hold a less than one to zero digits. My understanding of heels was any dressy footwear gals stereotypically wear, so flats should also be considered heels. Now I know others feel that heels have to be at least two inches and above for discussing them in this forum, but we can't negate one's preference to wear less than two inch heels.
radiodave Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 Agreed! Flats can be stylish too, and if we discuss heels worn by guys, which usually come from the "other" side of the store, then I see no reason we can't discuss the other shoes that come from that side of the store. Maybe they don't make the same noises or take the same level of skill, but they are comfortable.
SleekHeels Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 I do try to keep my talk of flats to a minimum (or at least in the "General Fashion" section), as this is "high heel" place after all. The thing is that I sometimes get just as much reaction wearing flats as I do wearing heels. Maybe it's because ballet flats and court heels tend to have the same low vamp where most of the top of the foot is exposed, which is perceived as a typically "feminine" style. As a consequence of this, if someone feels nervous about stepping out in heels, they could try stepping out in flats and that's most of the hurdle overcome, it's really not that big a step to progress to heels in terms of the reactions you'll get. The other approach seems to be to wear closed style heels (like oxfords or boots) or maybe even high-heeled loafers under jeans, perhaps with a wedge heel, as these are essentially a more "masculine" style but with a heel. Both approaches seem to be a good intermediate step towards wearing high-heeled courts, peeptoes or even sandals if that's the ultimate goal. As such I think that for some people at least, women's flats can play a role towards eventually getting out there in heels, so they're relevant in that respect. I also think that wearing flats can play an important role in managing the problem of shortened tendons from wearing heels all the time, so they're relevant in that respect too. It's the same with skirts and other freestyle fashion clothes items, they mostly belong in the "General Fashion" section but sometimes they do relate specifically to high heels, especially so in the "For the guys" section where the choice of outfit to accompany a pair of heels can make a big difference in the level of confidence when stepping out, and the impression that we project. I find it really interesting to see not just what kinds of heels guys are wearing, but also what they're wearing with them, and all the diverse ways that people can present themselves as guys in heels. Maybe some would dismiss the other clothes (and flats) as simply "cross-dressing" and beyond the scope of the forum, but the point is we're not trying to "pass" as women and avoid being "read", we're presenting ourselves as guys in heels and a lot of other stuff is relevant to that. If you like it, wear it.
RonC Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 Thighbootguy, I think that, in this situation, women's flats would have caused no less fuss than a pair of heeled boots, and perhaps even more. Rockbass 19 made the proper call here - wearing any type of "women's" footwear would have caused a ruckus among the closed-minded/judgmental group. Rockbass, enjoy a nice quiet evening out with your wife, where you don't have to put up with the opinions of other family members, and I believe both you and she will get much greater enjoyment that the family affair would have brought.
Thighbootguy Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 I didn't mean to start this much of a discussion but... My flats do have a heel so I guess I'm wearing a tan pump with 1/16" block heel. By the way, one of my favorite books is Flatland. I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.
Ynotme Posted October 31, 2014 Posted October 31, 2014 Don't they? Not even over-the-knee flats? I think the are a good example of semi flat with style
hh_pe Posted October 31, 2014 Posted October 31, 2014 Isn't a one inch heel considered a heel, just not a "high" heel? Ha, Ha. On a serious note, I have two pairs of flats that have a one inch heel. I purchased these with my wife assistance. Her requirement was the heels had to look "passable" as a man's shoe. While she is supportive of my high heel wearing, she is not comfortable with me wearing them outside of the house at this time. With the flats, she has no issues when I wear them. Several times I have asked her if we could go to a shoe store together and get matching boots. Normally she says "No way", but recently she has started saying if I can walk better in my high heals, then she might consider the idea.
Steve63130 Posted November 1, 2014 Posted November 1, 2014 Hh_pe, wow, the door is open! Practice is all it takes. Make your goal 168 hours (1 full week) in heels and you'll start to walk gracefully and with confidence. Be conscious of where you step so you don't slip or skid or fall. After a while, it will all come pretty automatically, like driving a car, and you'll be qualified for the matching boot award she's offered. Go for it! Steve
Gudulitooo Posted November 3, 2014 Posted November 3, 2014 You know I have seen guys discuss wearing flat "cavalry" boots with tight jeans tucked in on several forums. The answers were all "this boots scream female, etc." and laughing. So with a 1 to 2 inch heel, and "thin", it is already something.
hh_pe Posted November 4, 2014 Posted November 4, 2014 Steve, I've been practicing when I can. The only time I can truely work at it is when I am home and the kids are at school. I will help do the household cleaning, and walking in the heels is working. She has said I don't bounce as much anymore. Unfortunately, her mom has been with us for the past few months, so I haven't gotten any serious heeling time in. With winter coming, I'm hinting she needs a new pair of boots, and maybe, just maybe, we can find that matching pair as a Christmas gift to ourselves. hh
mlroseplant Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 I don't mean to rain on your parade, and I understand your limitations, but there is a big difference between walking around the house and walking outside. I can't tell you the number of times I have felt confident in the house, only to turn around after one block outside, thinking, "I need a little more practice in these." This usually happens with shoes that don't really fit me right, or shoes that are just too high for me at this time. Believe me, it is a very bad feeling to be at the far end of a shopping mall, and your only thought is, "Will I be able to make it back to the car?" I have the luxury of living in a place where I can walk outside late at night or early in the morning in relative privacy. Because I can practice beforehand, I know I can make it back to the car looking good and feeling good. Walking in these crazy shoes is an athletic challenge, and, as men, I think most of us embrace this challenge. Good luck in your endeavors!
vector Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Rockbass19, congrats! Glad to hear your envelope has expanded.
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