hh_pe

Thanks for the comments. After reading them, I realize using the word "Discovered" might have been a better for the title. With today (Monday) being the first full day with everyone in the office, I was a bit nervous and wondered how many people know by now. I realize word will get out. I'm curios on how long will it be before someone, other than the secretary, makes a comment, good or bad, about my heel wearing. If my coworkers were attempting to look today to see if I was wearing heels, they unfortunately were out of luck. I had men's dress shoes on and spent the majority of my time at my desk reviewing a report. I'm thinking about wearing my Aerosoles Accomplishments tomorrow, but I've worn these numerous times to the office. I guess if a lady who is familiar with the shoes were to see the diamond tread and recognize the pattern, then she would know.

I was caught this morning by the secretary at my office. On most Fridays, a good number of my peers work from home with the remaining staff starting around 8am. I typically get in at 6am so I can enjoy my cup of coffee and sift through all the weeks emails in peace. Over the few years that I've been at this firm, I've become more relaxed in my persona. We are a "progressive" company where most people are generally open and respectful of others peoples viewpoints and persuasions. Because of this atmosphere I started wearing my heels during this quiet period. I've always figured at some point I would get noticed, but I was also careful to change back to my male shoes when I heard someone enter the front door. Don't need to draw unnecessary attention to myself as a manager if I don't need too. So this morning, I was playing music on my phone while I got the coffee pot brewing and didn't hear the front door open. The kitchen is in the back of our office. As I'm getting the filter and coffee grinds out, she clears her throat and says "Interesting footwear". I "jumped" so much, more grinds went on the floor than in the filter. After we both stopped laughing about what happened, I told her that I've always enjoyed wearing heels and explained my typical Friday routine. For some reason I wasn't afraid she was going to report me or make a big deal about it. I think it was due to all the conversations we've had ever since I started. We're both about the same age and have some similar experiences. As we cleaned up the mess I made, she started asking me some of the typical questions such as, why, what's the highest heel I have, style preferences, and how many heels do I own. She confessed she is a heel lover too, but normally wears flats to work since she takes public transportation to the office. She also explained the reason why she was in so early is her husband dropped her off on his way to a construction site near by. We talked until the next employee came in. Thankfully we were in my office at this point and you can not see my feet when I'm sitting at my desk. As we wrapped up our conversation, she said she would wear a few of her heels for me to see and I told her I would do the same.

I always count my blessings in how lucky I am to have an understanding wife. I "came out" to her while we were dating (over twenty years ago). She helped me get appropriately fitting heels and taught me how to walk in them. When we started a family, she requested I don't wear heels in front of the kids, but helped me select flats which could pass as a mans shoe. As the saying goes "Happy Wife, Happy Life".

Aerosoles are my favorite shoes, mainly because these are what my wife wears.

I've started applying a clear coat to my finger nails. I can not wear color polish since I have kids, and work in a professional environment. Also, there is the fact what I do must get my wife's approval first. I know this is very tame compared to those wonderful colors some of you have shown,

Waist high boots They look unfinished to me. In my opinion, the only decent look was of the woman with the top folded down.

BamBam, Welcome to the site. I'm sure you noticed there are many guys here with great advice on heel wearing. I learned from many of them, and their words have helped me become more confident in wearing heels in public. I hope you find as much wisdom in their words as I have. HH_PE

Earlier this week, I was taking an evening class at the University of California Los Angeles (UCLA). When I left the building and started walking to the parking garage, I saw a young man crossing the street wearing pumps. What drew my attention to him was his stride, or I should say lack of. He walked horribly in the heels. Each step looked painful for him, and was for me to watch. Everyone around the intersection knew he was wearing heels because he had shorts on. Once he got to the other side of the street, he found a bench, sat down, and put his head in his hands. Seeing this, I began to think he was a fraternity pledge and this was part of his "rite of passage". Since he was alone, and many of the other kids were staring and pointing at him, I figured I would offer him some advice on wearing heels. When I sat down on the beach, he didn't move or look up. At this point I could tell the shoes were plain black pumps with about a three inch heel and were a bit small for him. To break the ice, I asked him which fraternity was he pledging. He looked up, gave me a response and said this was the most humiliating thing he ever had to do. After some more small talk about the stuff they made him do, I asked him how did he get forced into wearing heels. It was a punishment for not bringing enough girls to a party. I was never in a fraternity, so this seemed like a really stupid reason to humiliate someone. I asked how long was he required to wear the heels. He had until the next party, which was several days away. I told him his heels were too small for his feet, which explained why he had such a difficult time walking in them. I also recommended he get a bigger size with a lower heel for the next time he has to do this. After giving a few more tips, I told him to walk with confidence holding his head up high. If he looked confident walking in heels, then people would be less likely to say negative things. He finally asked me how do I know this. I just told him I've been wearing heels for years, smiled, and showed him my Aerosoles Accomplishments. I told him the shoes are considered flats, and are more comfortable than any men's dress shoe I own. I did tell him I have a few pairs of heels with 2-1/2 inch heels that I occasionally wear in public. I wished him good luck and then headed to my car.

So here is the after action report. Overall everyone liked the look. Several of the women at the party, including my wife, thought boots with a higher heel, and a tighter shaft would have looked better. A few women were disappointed I wasn't wearing higher heels. When I asked what height should I attempt to get, one woman suggested 6 inches. I don't think my ankles would survive that height anymore. It was also suggested a belt around my waist could add to the overall look. I feel a belt would accentuate the fact I could lose a few pounds. One comment I received suggested I go with black leggings and brown boots next time due to the color contrast. This look seems more popular than black boots with dark tights. My jeggings are a dark blue. Based on everyone's comments, I think for my frame structure, the first outfit works better for me. Now, for the next party, I've asked my wife to find me some black tights that will cover my leg hair. I want to take it up a notch and wear my black Aerosoles Prologue T-strap heels with a skirt. Since summer is upon us, shaving my legs is not an option right now (Wife's orders). Enjoy heeling everyone. hh_pe

My wife and I are off to an other party this evening. Here is what I'm wearing this time. Boots, jeggings and a white dress shirt.

RayCF, I have to second what HappyinHeels states, pay attention to your wife. The key, which you imply in your message, is to have open communication about this issue. I too am lucky, my wife is supportive of my heel wearing. When our eldest was about two year old, I realized I had to stop wearing heels around the house. Our child was growing up fast, and my mother in-law was spending more time with us. My wife also indicated it was time for me to stop because she expressed the same concerns your wife indicated to you. When the kids got older (we have three now), I asked my wife what style of women's shoes would she consider acceptable for me to wear in public, even with the kids. She suggested a few styles of flats, which I know are not "high" heels, but they work for now. I always show my wife what I would like to purchase prior to getting the shoe for her approval. If she doesn't think the shoe will pass for a men's shoe, then I don't get it. My kids see me wear the flats and have never said anything about it. I do have two pairs of 3-inch heels, but those only come out when the kids are not around. And remember that old saying "A happy wife is a happy life".

SF, you got me thinking about why we don't see more men in heels here in LA. With Hollywood, and all the other alternative lifestyles that are present here, one would think heel wearing by men would be more prevalent. Maybe we can blame it on the weather, with shorts and sandals weather almost 360 days a year. Or the alternative could be because the greater LA area is so large, with so many people going everywhere at a hundred miles an hour, we just are not in the right place at the right time, and are to busy to notice.

Thanks guys. The heels are Gin Rickey's from Aerosoles, my wife's favorite shoe store. I love the way the elastic bands conform to your feet, and are very comfortable to walk in. It was great to get out in public. My job, as mentioned in other posts, is in a professional setting, so wearing heels at the office is a BIG NO NO. During the evening, I had a wonderful conversation with a male theater performer who has worn heels a few times for various roles. We compared notes on how to walk without drawing attention to yourself. The way he learned was very similar to what many of us have said before, start with a lower heel, wear it around the house, and when the heels feel no different than your normal "man" shoes, move up to a higher heel. We also agreed, most people don't notice your shoes unless you want them to. I even had one lady suggested I paint my toe nails the next time. I mentioned it is difficult to do with children at home, but would attempt to do it should I have more time the next time to get ready for the party. I wore pants to the party because my legs are hairy. I think I will have to convince my wife to let me shave my legs and go in nylons and new pumps the next time. HappyinHeels, the statement "everyone is equal but some people are more equal than others" does appear truthful. I don't think my wife would seek permission from me to wear a men's suit, but to be honest, I don't think she would ever dress in a masculine way. Maybe for the next party I might suggest it to see what happens.

On Friday, my wife and I went to a party hosted by a good college friend of hers. This friend works in the costuming industry for theaters and is know for having some lavish parties. As I was getting ready, I mindlessly asked "what should I wear" not knowing if this was a casual get together, or more of a big costume deal. I was told it was a casual costume affair, which didn't really help me. So I asked my wife if wearing my heals and jeans would be a casual costume (Side note: my wife accepts my wearing of women's heels, and is okay with me wearing flats that can pass as men's shoes in public, but has never agreed to me wearing high heels openly in public). She responded by saying sure and suggested I wear my women stretch jeans to help with the look. I have to admit, while in the car, I was very nervous about what the reaction would be. When we got to the party, her friend greeted us at the door and just screamed with joy when she saw my heels. I was quickly paraded around to say hello to everyone we knew, and be introduced to new people. I was the only guy wearing heels, and no one reacted negatively. I even got a few complements from some of the ladies there saying I walk really well in heels for a guy. When we started to leave, my wife's friend asked me if I have any other heels in my collection. I just smiled, and my wife responded with "you will just have to wait until the next costume party to find out." I just love the way her mind works. On the drive home, we talked about the conversations we had with people at the party. Eventually, I got around to asking how she felt about me wearing heels given we knew a lot of people at the party. She figured since it was a costume party, and knows how much I want to start wearing heels in public, the party was an okay compromise. She just requested I don't go over board by always wearing heels to every party in the future. I promised her I wouldn't, but told her we will need to go shopping at some point for something new for the next time it is okay to wear heels to the party.

I find women's clothing to be more comfortable than men's. I guess my dressing transitioned from wanting to look like a woman (i.e. wigs, body contouring clothing, make-up, etc.) to just a guy who enjoys women attire. Stretch jeans and yoga pants are the only female times I constantly wear now. When appropriate, I will wear the jeans in public. The yoga pants and the one skirt I have are for home use only.