Father Argue About My Heels And Guys In Website Here

[jim102]

Hello! For the first week in my life i was wearing heels in public it was the begining for hell with me. Those 3 members of the family discovered that! My hidden place. I have trouble to say anything and would like to stay without saying nothing! He entered in my personal life. My secret but I prefer to hide the rest of it. He does not understand and I do not trust him and everybody!

 

 

He says he does not accept that and to not listen what you say and you have serious mind problems. I tried to explain how good it is but he still disaprove all your behaviour and mine. You give meeting here to meet the person and get sexual abusing. He says why could you trust them? They make you do stupidities! That starts with transvestism as the boots to finish as a woman completely!

 

I would continue to wear heels and get bad reactions of people in general. With the face I have people will say I have a mental sickness. People will take a picture with their phones and your dog will be dead! They will show that to internet. No women will love me in the future and I will make my grandmother die and make crazy my mother. I will be the worst person in the society.

 

GO get love with women instead of doing stupidities!

 

He said that yesterday and the day before he yelled  and argue with his wife(not my mother). I said nothing bad.

 

I refunded all my heels except boots I gave for diabetic people.

 

 

Now I feel very bad, have trouble to sleep and to think all the time.

 

 

For the first time I was happy BANG!!! BANG!!! YOU`RE WRONG my  Transvestism son!

 

 

My heart is trusting you and myself and the other my father!

 

 

I do not know what to say and do hell came to me!

 

 

[hh4evr1]

There are alot of worse things you could do in life than wear heels. Some people react badly when they find out, but they can change what they think once they have got over the initial shock.

[ilikekicks]

Couple of questions..

 

I had a bit of trouble following all the details. Do you use a translator for French to English or something? 

 

If your Father doesnt like your wearing heels, theres not much you can do about it. Put it past you and go on with life. Your not going to changer him or his views. Just co-exist and when the chance becomes available, spend less time around him.

[newheeler]

I agree. Try to first find your support in real life then deal with the family business. That should show them it's a harmless hobby, until then... you can hope but it's hard to change peoples way of thinking on a topic if they decided not to live with it. I wish you good luck!

[jim102]

It is not easy each day I Wake up and I cannot accept him. He is terribly narrow-minded and say the fact I like heels it has an important blocking in my life the reason why I never had girlfriends.

 

Now as I am writing you i just blasted him couple of insults and he defer all on me. When he will by dying I will not go se him. That`s not a father I have it is an ennemy. I should let him quiet I waste my time

 

 

 

Ilikekicks I do not use Google I have trouble in English so I try by myself

[AZShoeNut]

Hey Jim, I am sorry to read about your experience. The thing is, as I have come to understand it, your thing for heels probably isn't going to go away. I know that for me and my wife it has been a challenge but it, ever so slowly gets better. This figure in your life, I believe your dad, has probably never heard of something like this. Whether this is in your head or not this is something that you have and/or like. You will likely be doing yourself a disservice if you try to quit. Having not experienced this situation exactly myself it is hard for me to suggest anything myself. What comes up for me is to suggest that if you want a relationship with him and you think he might value a relationship with you then attempt to find some common ground and attempt to educate him. If he is so set in his opinion that this is not an option then it could be to your advantage to find space on your own, see yourself as we see you, which is as a perfectly fine human being, and connect with others who will then second that opinion. Feeling your pain and wishing you the best, Larry

[ilikekicks]

Im going to *try* here. Ive been ' shunned ' so.. heres my attempt at this..

 

It is not easy each day I Wake up and I cannot accept him. He is terribly narrow-minded and say the fact I like heels it has an important blocking in my life the reason why I never had girlfriends.

 

Now as I am writing you i just blasted him couple of insults and he defer all on me. When he will by dying I will not go se him. That`s not a father I have it is an ennemy. I should let him quiet I waste my time

 

 

 

Ilikekicks I do not use Google I have trouble in English so I try by myself

 

"It is not easy each day I Wake up and I cannot accept him."

 

OK. Initially you stated he doesnt like your wearing heels and from what was written, Im going to assume he wont accept you or doesnt like you because of your choice of shoes. Now your saying you ' cannot accept him '. Do you mean he cannot accept you as your first comment stated?

 

It sounds like theres more then just shoes causing problems between the 2 of you and its a situation where you both are at odds with one another. I could be wrong, but Im trying to make sense of whats being said.

 

"He is terribly narrow-minded and say the fact I like heels it has an important blocking in my life the reason why I never had girlfriends."

 

He feels that because you wear heels women might not like you or may have caused you to not gain the attention of some women/girls. Hes probably correct. There are MANY women out there whom are SCARED of men taking over their fashion styles/trends just as there are many men ( maybe even your father ) whom feel men shouldnt wear womens clothes. as much as none of us want to hear it, its TRUE.

 

There have been links to websites here in the past with girls mocking men in heels. Some pictures with a blog and some with video. The ' stereotype ' that men whom wear heels are all gay/trannies/have mental problems actually do apply to some individuals but not a whole group.

 

"Now as I am writing you i just blasted him couple of insults and he defer all on me. When he will by dying I will not go se him. That`s not a father I have it is an ennemy. I should let him quiet I waste my time"

 

I take it you had an exchange of hostilities? ( deferred onto you? )

 

Thats your choice. To not make peace with those whom die before they go is something you will live with for the rest of your time. Make sure its exactly what you want before doing it as you cannot change such a judgement.

 

"Ilikekicks I do not use Google I have trouble in English so I try by myself"

 

What is your native/first language? I have access to a couple of paid-for translators that I wouldnt at all mind your using. Where in Canada are you near?

[jim102]

I do not accept him beacause he does not accept my desire.  He disagree and I agree.

 

He still use the same ways to talk. Narrow-minded Beauce he strongly disagree and He did not use an appropriate way to talk with me. He was and still narrow-minded evreything you say he reports that to you. He is not open minded it is like you talk with a Mirror. He thinks he is better than me and what I say he says I am useless to myself.  He assumes nothing all is my fault and him the perfect one! He believes that no one can attack him. That`s parents! You tell them they are perfect and they say no. Impossible to have peace with them they underestimate me.

 

After they say they tried to help the result they make much and more trouble they repair!

 

 

Now I do not care about heels I have enough of all

[Gudulitooo]

Maybe your father should have tried this  ? 

So if he didn't, that may well be because he thinks you are wise enough to decide by yourself, don't you think ?

Finally, let's imagine you are the father, and you beloved kid grows and finally buys his heels. What would you wish and say as a father ?

[hhboots]

It sounds to me like you might have had a troublesome relationship with your father, even before the heels came about.  So it depends, if you wish to mend your relationship with your father, then put aside the desire for heels for a while, not sure how long you have until you are out on your own, but maybe until then.  Otherwise, you will have to try and find a way to co-exist with your father.  When I was young, living at home, I did own a few heels, but kept that part of my life very secret.  I think my mom knew because, well, she's a mom, but still I kept it to myself until I was out of the house. 

 

So I am not sure if this site somehow gave you the courage/bravery to bring out the heels in front of your father, but apparently that was a bad idea, and it sounds like he won't be changing his mind any time soon.  So, your options are to keep a couple pairs heels if you wish, but be sure they are kept out of his view (out of sight, out of mind), or you may have to just try to stay away from heels completely until you have your own place to live and do what you want.

[Guest]

Curious, how old are you

[SF]

Heels2u, Yep, that was my first question when I began reading this….    sf

[ilikekicks]

I do not accept him beacause he does not accept my desire.  He disagree and I agree.

 

He still use the same ways to talk. Narrow-minded Beauce he strongly disagree and He did not use an appropriate way to talk with me. He was and still narrow-minded evreything you say he reports that to you. He is not open minded it is like you talk with a Mirror. He thinks he is better than me and what I say he says I am useless to myself.  He assumes nothing all is my fault and him the perfect one! He believes that no one can attack him. That`s parents! You tell them they are perfect and they say no. Impossible to have peace with them they underestimate me.

 

After they say they tried to help the result they make much and more trouble they repair!

 

 

Now I do not care about heels I have enough of all

 

"I do not accept him beacause he does not accept my desire.  He disagree and I agree."

 

I have had desires and life experiences that mattered more then my shoe-wearing. My folks didnt agree with what I was doing but eventually, I found out its a 2 way street.

 

I was so wasted on Heroine/Acid that theres events I cannot recall at all. 

 

You might not like hearing this but MANY people will say to themselves ' Ya know.. maybe my folks were right '. Its a realization we all hate to admit.

 

"Narrow-minded Beauce he strongly disagree and He did not use an appropriate way to talk with me."

 

It sounds like a 2 way street here but its under HIS roof, not yours. Heres an example from my life.

 

My Step Father Rides bikes. Hes been with a few clubs. He doesnt like ' niggers ', he doesnt like ' Catholics ', he doesnt like ' fags ', he doesnt like foreign cars, he doesnt like ' insert whatever you want '. He was quite upset and quite vocal that I wouldnt hire any ' white people ' when I ran my business. " Those Niggers are going to turn lazy on you one day and you'll go bankrupt from it! ". I didnt care at all for the way he spoke down about EVERYONE that wasnt his ' ideal ' type of person. 

 

I waited for the day he put in the terms ' Jew ' and ' spic ' on his list but it never came.

 

Something I did realize AFTER I left was he DID put food on the table. He DID provide shelter. He DID get me out of juvenile detention quite a few times. He did buy me all sorts of music equipment and paid for the lessons I attended when I was very young.

 

Theres good and bad in everyone, including yourself. *I* have had some demons of the past to deal with. You will too.

 

"He thinks he is better than me and what I say he says I am useless to myself. "

 

I was called ' useless '. It means nothing today. At one point I was useless, yep, quite true. I dont know of what you do, how old you are, where you live or your whole situation, I cannot say if someone outside of my own realm is anything, good or bad.

 

"That`s parents! You tell them they are perfect and they say no. Impossible to have peace with them they underestimate me."

 

It sounds like you need to walk away. See how life on your own would be. Pay your own bills, buy your own food, become independent. If you cannot do such, you need to learn your place until you have the means to provide for yourself. If your already on your own, why bother dealing with your father at all then?

[Histiletto]

Hey! Jim102,

 

My parents also did not accept my wearing of heels, either. In my childhood, I would often get my sister's dress shoes without her permission, of course, and wear them until I was caught wearing them and reprimanded or I returned them without her knowing. This activity was an on- going happening (even day to day at times), until I was able to find other sources to somewhat satisfy my desire. When I grew old enough to make some money from many different small jobs, I bought my heels a couple of times. When my parents had discovered where I was keeping them, I was confronted with their disapproval. However, they were not as condemning and labeling as your dad has done. So, to say that I have an idea of your feelings would not be true at this point. After their initial reprimands were over, the first time I had to get rid of them. The second time, they took my 4" heels away and gave them to my sister, which made buying heels a bad investment at that time, so returned to satisfying my desire to wear heels as I had previously done. Actually, in this scenario of having no heels of my own with the conscious separations and then seeing heels at different places caused this desire to increase. Eventually, it developed into an all out obsession by the time I was on my own. So, just buying a pair of heels was not enough. I became a high heel shopaholic at times and then purged them for different reasons and situations at other times. Then I realized purging was not the answer, for I came to really regret loosing those heels. Now my selections are more than adequate for wearing heels publicly and I still have the desire to buy more. 

 

Since then, my parents have passed on and we never really discussed any of this, with me at least. Like your dad, they saw it as trying to be a women or at least dressing in their clothes. The social attitude towards gender has caused them to misunderstand human nature. There are truths in the gender idea, but there are also inaccuracies, which has mislead most people into their traditional thinking. To change everyone's perspective and social indoctrination is like changing their religious beliefs, explaining to a person of the fourteenth century that the world is not flat and the sun doesn't revolve around the earth, or getting them to acknowledge that there could be human beings on other planets in different galaxies. We know what we feel and what we desire. No one else or learning can change this. It probably wouldn't do any good to turn the accusations and say women are becoming men for not being home makers and nurturing the kiddies (which is also false), but this is another traditional view. 

 

I wish you the best in life and in dealing with your present circumstance. As a person, who is able to understand and evaluate what you should do according to who you are, I have confidence in your judgment for you. Take care and post us, if there is any way we can be of help, for all of us need such an associations at times.

[tim1]

Hi Jim,

 

I see from your profile that you're 22. At that age, you're really no longer a child, but it sounds like your father treats you like one.  Maybe he thinks he's helping you in some way. You are certainly your own man, but while you're under your father's roof, I think you probably have to either accept what he says for now, or at least be very discreet. 

 

In the longer term, maybe you need to save what you can, and start thinking about moving to a place of your own or sharing with some more tolerant/open-minded people - maybe a student place or something? 

 

Whatever you choose, I wish you every success.

[Dr. Shoe]

I think the main reason you don't have a girlfriend is because you have a narrow minded bully for a father. As Tim says you should move out and do your own thing.

[jim102]

I do not understand D.r Shoe

 

Girlfriend problem is not related to that

 

 

With days passed and pass again I realized he was right He wanted my own good. I was destroying my life my image since then I do not want to start again the same experience I have enough. I enjoyed and feel tired of that!

 

People would continue to laugh of me and I would scare women and have a bad reputation

 

 

I will take a girlfriend instead of wearing heels excitation is better for seeing a woman in heels

 

 

I had a really good short time but I regret it was in winter instead of autumn. I wanted to wear black court shoes it is better for walking! More easy

[Bubba136]

I don't believe there is one male member of this forum that would ever chose heels over a girlfriend. However, I also believe if a girlfriend ever appears in the mix, the guy had better explain his heels thing to her as soon as the relationship appears to becoming more serious. Otherwise, when she does finally find out, the guy is liable to be faced with the ultimatum " it's the girl or the heels.

[Chorlini]

I do not understand D.r Shoe

 

Girlfriend problem is not related to that

 

 

With days passed and pass again I realized he was right He wanted my own good. I was destroying my life my image since then I do not want to start again the same experience I have enough. I enjoyed and feel tired of that!

 

People would continue to laugh of me and I would scare women and have a bad reputation

 

 

I will take a girlfriend instead of wearing heels excitation is better for seeing a woman in heels

 

 

I had a really good short time but I regret it was in winter instead of autumn. I wanted to wear black court shoes it is better for walking! More easy

 

If you have to give up something you like because of what others expect of you I can pretty much guarantee you 100% that you will end up feeling miserable and resentful later on in life.

 

 

 

I don't believe there is one male member of this forum that would ever chose heels over a girlfriend. However, I also believe if a girlfriend ever appears in the mix, the guy had better explain his heels thing to her as soon as the relationship appears to becoming more serious. Otherwise, when she does finally find out, the guy is liable to be faced with the ultimatum " it's the girl or the heels.

 

I'd take heels over girlfriend in a second. If they don't like who I am, I don't like them in return. Of course being honest up front goes without saying.

[jim102]

I know it will probably come back  that feeling but I have done the ultimate goal I was expected. i do not have a girlfriend. Heels was for me just an experience. The truth I have confidence in myself. But know as I went to many places I do not need to go commercial centre in heels I got what I wanted and I am very satisfied even if it did not work like i would. That was the principal for me. Wearing heels in public without beeing too much worried!

 

 

What could I tell you more? It is not my fault if my small town are narrow-minded. I enjoyed it for a sexual thing and otherwise just for trying in public.

 

It was a pleasure to share my experiences with you guys!

 

 

My pleasure was a hidden secret to family but  with everyone who knows it no longer stays an interesting desire.  How would you continue? Fun is missing!

[maninpumps]

Jim, 

 This topic is all over the place ! In my opinion you need to figure out your priorities . This can be accomplished and it will get better. Ever hear the saying "you can't have your cake and eat it to." That is what this sounds like to me. You can make your life a lot better. First thing STAND UP for what you believe and don't back down, your father will respect that. Second if you like high heels wear them and show your pride. Third be true to girlfriends and any family members that are curious about you. Either way you choose you need to respect JIM and be true to yourself and hiding in the shadows and complaining in here to a bunch of strangers is not the way to do it.  I told my girlfriend and now my wife about my high heels when we were dating and yes it was scary telling her ...glad I did because after I told her our relationship has just grown as it does everyday. That was 18 years ago we have two dandy children and they know of my thing for heels. It's up to you to make your future or someone else will and that will make you a sheep following another sheep in a field . When you look up from grazing all you will see are other sheep and fence holding you in. I get the feeling you want more and it's up to you to get it. I am positive that if you do stand up you will see what I am talking about. It's all about your attitude and how you carry yourself. Per your last post you will not be happy long and you will be back in here or worse off. I hope you find happiness in your future and good luck to ya!!!!  Next time you are in here I want to hear some positive feedback about some of your heeling proclivities !!!

[SF]

Somethang ain't right here….  Hmmmm...

Having said that, maninpumps - You bet, like you, I told my girlfriend (now my wife) about my passion for women's sandals and high heels.  It was scary, she accepted it and we have been married 30+ years!!  My kids know dad likes to wear women's shoes, but I have never worn in their presence or in front of their friends.  You just gotta be true to yourself and do what makes you and those around you happy.  Hopefully Jim can / will get things sorted out.    take care…  sf

[maninpumps]

SF , Agreed !!!

[Dr. Shoe]

Yup, couldn't agree more.

[jim102]

After that event I stopped to wear boots but I continue to try shoes in stores but not with male clerk or sellers!

 

I do not like when they laugh!

[Pumps]

After that event I stopped to wear boots but I continue to try shoes in stores but not with male clerk or sellers!

 

I do not like when they laugh!

 

I know that some things in life would be easier if you didn't have such an uncommon "hobby", but don't think you can turn off your love of heels. Take it from me, It just doesn't work.

[Foxyheels]

Jim be who you are not who you are told to be. I guarantee you it will happen anyway with time. Find an open minded girlfriend and live your life as you please.I know it's not easy but times are changing for the better.

[jim102]

For sure I also went to stores and I was afraid of men sellers. I was affraid for nothing. They did not say anything! Absolutely nothing!

 

Yes some guys in here are right my fetish heels will never disappear!  I just wanna do it again. I have to find other supportive family member but I do not want to tell to all my family. I may try to talk with the mother-in-law when she will come back she seemed more opened when my father was angry and worried. She said to him you must have to accept that at frist but he did not and still not but there is nothing to do with him so i will find other comprehensive people. Women have not difficulties to understand and at stores they are great and very nice. You talk them and they are already aware of that and you guys here and me and women sellers have an updated and opened mind. Sellers know that is very hard when the family discover that! We know there is no problem but I need to talk with someone conerning that and until now there is noone and it is very hard to keep that in mind and no talk. I may continue ask support at stores with women I find great but I need you also.

 

 

I cannot believe in 2014  heels for men is still not enough tolerated!  I have no bad comments when I wear heels in stores when I try them even a mother and her children!  People do not care of what I wear. That`s not fair I do not need my father agreement I will buy new heels one day just too bad for others who disagree I have enough I have now 23 it is my birhtday now on february 24th. 

 

I am free of wearing anything I want but I still think what he told me:

 

You could be attacked by someone because you are different and be a fool for some guys but I will defend myself and ignore them at first. So with the comment he made I am afraid of men groups.

 

 

You have been brainwashed by the guys in this forum. They manipulate you to do what they want to make you in trouble! They are not normal!

 

 

The reason I came here it was by curiosity and the fact I have a common point with everyone here. It is my own choice and I think no one of you are responsible for the fact I worn heels in public. That was my choice! Me and not from you!

 

 

Concerning people that will take me in picture or video and will send it to internet to make me in trouble. I do not think of that and I do not believe that.

 

 

People start to wear heels to finish to become women!   What is that stupid way of thinking?

 

 

 

It is nonsense prejudices and invented things by poorly educated people who never seen that during their life. They are afraid their family member becomes abnormal or crazy with bad behaviours. My father did not graduated from high school so that could explain his mind.

 

For him I am a shame for the family and i does hime very shame.

 

 

 

I have so much trouble to live with those things in my mind!  I cannot get out of that **** alone!

 

 

You told me good comments but I need extra time and a girlfriend that will love that. I will go shopping in heels with her in heels too.

[ilikekicks]

"You have been brainwashed by the guys in this forum. They manipulate you to do what they want to make you in trouble! They are not normal!"

 

Your Father is correct Jim.

 

Most of us work for a living. Most of us upkeep where we live. I would say a bunch of us are quite social and outgoing. Some play in bands, some ride motorcycles, some ride horses..

 

Seeing as most people tend to do things a bit different like live off a welfare type program or point the finger at everyone else for their problems, That wouldnt reflect on most of the members here.

 

So, in a few words, Your father is correct, We tend not to be of the ' normal ' type. We are more of the productive type whom wish to live in peace and liberty.

 

Cheers!

[jim102]

Now I am confused!

 

You say my father is correct so it means he was right?

 

 

Most people here have treated me?

 

 

I do not think so and I talked with few women sellers and they are in favor with heels for men. Most in here are too. So you cannot say people in here are not normal and bad guys!

 

 

3 women told me things that most of you said to me. They are openminded. Men here are right it is the others who are not enough educated!

 

The woman today told me to not care about family comments. Live my live as I want. Even it is hard when it is one member of your family is not right!

 

Do not worry about that. Do not be anxious.