Anyone tried to cure it?

[Pumps]

I can imagine that some people here at some point trying to get rid of their heel obsession. No matter how ok we think it is, it's still tabu among other people. I was thinking about the movie "Brewsters millions" where the main character has to spend a lot of money to become sick of spending money, so with that logic I'm going away to Germany for a couple of days, only bringing heels. No escape. Maybe afterwards I'll be sick of heels ? What do you think ?

[ImInHeels]

I think once you get back you would want nothing more to do with your heels.

[Olounda]

Well number 1, Money is different than Heels. The Draw to wear a certain footwear comes from within yourself, where as monies comes from external source. I would go so far as to make a bet that you will come back from germany with a new found confidence that you will be able to wear your footwear wherever.

[gwl1]

Pumps, I have the opinion that: 1. You'll enjoy yourself and have a great time in heels. 2. You'll wear heels even more when you get back. There's no such thing as a "cure." It's not a disease in the first place (unless it totally controls your life). It's a passion, and as long as it's kept in balance, it's not unhealthy and it's not wrong. It's just different from what mainstream men wear. But so what? Consider yourself fortunate that you've been blessed with the gift of that passion and enjoy wearing shoes that are fun. Think of all the millions of guys out there that don't get to enjoy the experience of wearing heels because they either don't have the passion or don't have the confidence. You have both. Have a great holiday! GWL

[onyourtoes]

Be sure to post pictures of the heels you buy while there

[onyourtoes]

Be sure to post pictures of the heels you buy while there Many of us have purged our collections at one time or another, sometimes more than once. In the long run it just makes room for more heels, and sometime we're sad over the loss of some favorite pair or another. I used to imagine going to a therapist to get cured, but these thoughts always degenerated into thinking about what shoes I would wear to appointments and show. In the end, I accept who I am, and I'm a better person for that. I'm also much more tolerant of other people's idiosyncrasies.

[Bad_Robot]

I have never tried to find a cure as I don't think there is one, but I have looked for the reason why I like heels, but never found one.

So now I am just happy to wear my heels and not analyse the reasons behind my doing so, leaving me a much happier and content chap......just go with the flow....heels sometime just come from deep inside you.

[Histiletto]

You could become a brain surgeon and change your mind. Or a podiatrist and work on de-feet. Talk about one liners. I hope I never have to hear these laughing faces. Their sound would probably drive me to the moon, Norton.

[jmc]

I can imagine that some people here at some point trying to get rid of their heel obsession. No matter how ok we think it is, it's still tabu among other people.

I was thinking about the movie "Brewsters millions" where the main character has to spend a lot of money to become sick of spending money, so with that logic I'm going away to Germany for a couple of days, only bringing heels. No escape. Maybe afterwards I'll be sick of heels ? What do you think ?

Don't bet on it. Nobody here has ever mentioned "curing" it and the general consensus is it is not curable.

You will come back loving heels even more and planning another trip so you can do it again.

[Spikeheels]

Hello everyone and haven't been on here for ages as been away but am glad to finally get back on here and catch up on all the latest and hope everyone is ok. I must admit that I have tried to stop the "urge" to wear heels but have always failed! I have got quite a large collection of very high heels along with pvc mini skirts and dresses and when I have the house to myself I find it impossible not to put on my heels and outfits and walk around the house. I think that if you enjoy it then the old saying of "why mend something if it's not broken" comes to mind so why not carry on.

[Arctic]

I don't think that's gonna work What does work though, is what I experienced: I broke several toes running for a ringing phone 3 something weeks ago and hitting the door-frame. Today I tried my pointy toed boots, but not for long

[vector]

This thread is somewhat remiscent of a song by Diana Ross, Love Hangover. It begins, "...If there's a cure for this, I don't want it, don't want it..."

[FXHH]

agree with the comment, its not a sickness!! besides that!! have tried many times to get heels out of my mind and life, it does not work!! have on more then one occasion, gotten rid of the heels, it did not work!! and thanx to this this place, now have a much better understanding of my self and the heels, and dont think will be attempting that again, now just enjoying it and having fun!!

[JP92]

Don't know if there is a way to 'cure' and don't care and don't want to know. I don't need it, i do not want change anything. Why to try to change what makes me so happy, even if it's looks like strange for many people.

[Thighboots2]

Pumps, I'm with the majority - there is no "cure" as such, because there is nothing to "cure". The biggest problem is to be true to yourself. You like stiletto heels - wear stiletto heels. You like to wear cuban heels (me), wear cuban heels (I do). It is no big issue. It is about finding your comfort zone. Once you are comfortable with yourself, so is everyone else around you and you sort of melt into the background. It is a never ending source of amazement to me just how perceptive the human animal is. I suppose it is because we as a species, whilst near the top of the food chain, are still vunerable to certain preditors, so our instincts are always on the lookout for a possible source of attack when we are in an isolated position, thus we radiate this uncertainty. the hunter side of our nature is constantly looking for a possible target that is vunerable thus and easy target. If you are quite at ease with yourself, you don't radiate the vunerable signal to the hunter. Next time your out shopping, analyse what attracts you to look at specific people because you'll be in hunter mode. Simon.

[AZShoeNut]

Howdy, I also agree that this is not something to be fixed as I don't think that anything is broken. I have known several therapists and have even seen a few and the consensus is that if it doesn't hurt yourself or anybody else then there is not a problem. Have fun in Germany!! Later, Larry

[Thighmax]

As everyone has mentioned. I have tried to get rid of this "problem" but found out that it is not a problem it is something we like. I have bought countless pairs of thigh boots, and threw them away after I felt there was something wrong with me. After a while I would go back and buy more pairs of boots. I even went to a few psychologists. They say that it is not wrong its only different. One of them even ventured to say that I was being innovative. If you have the courage to use them everywhere don't try to get rid of it. Embrace what you like and have fun using whatever you like.

[roniheels]

As the consensus seems to be, there is no illness so there's no need for a cure. I have never ever seen anything wrong with wearing high heels and I lived through a period of time when both men and women wore high heels openly and publicly. No matter what type of fashion a person wears, someone will have a negative opinion about it. I wear 5" stiletto high heels in public and I don't see anything wrong with enjoying doing that. If someone sees me and doesn't approve, that's there problem and it doesn't mean that I am sick. It is simply self-expression. If you want to wear high heels, wear high heels. If you want to take a break from wearing them, then do so. Don't put undo pressure on yourself for a problem that is not really a problem.

[Pumps]

As the consensus seems to be, there is no illness so there's no need for a cure. I have never ever seen anything wrong with wearing high heels and I lived through a period of time when both men and women wore high heels openly and publicly. No matter what type of fashion a person wears, someone will have a negative opinion about it. I wear 5" stiletto high heels in public and I don't see anything wrong with enjoying doing that. If someone sees me and doesn't approve, that's there problem and it doesn't mean that I am sick. It is simply self-expression. If you want to wear high heels, wear high heels. If you want to take a break from wearing them, then do so. Don't put undo pressure on yourself for a problem that is not really a problem.

I never said there was anything wrong with it. I will always support and advocate for fashion freedom, but heeling in public is not for everyone and for various reasons. I just decided a while ago in my "quitting the heels" post that it wasn't for me and as such it would be a lot easier if I wasn't so obsessed with heels. And just as everyone here has the rights to wear heels, I should have the right not to, right ? Anyway, I'm trying this and will let you know afterwards.

[Histiletto]

Hey Pumps, I support you right to choose. If you should find it more to what you want for you, I'm happy for you. Like they say: life is too short, not to do what you want to do. I wish you the best and I'm interested to hear how you're doing from time to time concerning this post. The idea of putting our heels away, even permanently, has been a part of most all of our choices. Usually though, since this desire came from who we are, it's kind of like cutting out or off part of our total being that is integrated into everything we have experienced. We all want to be chosen for who we are and not what others want us to be.

[Bubba136]

Some people try very hard to categorize everything. Putting all high heel wearers into the same "pigeon hole" just isn't appropriate, as all of us are aware. There are so many variables entering into a personality that accounts for our desire to wear woman's shoes. Childhood memories or visions of an occurrence, episode, happening, that lit the fire of appetite to engage in such activity. We're all different with different experiences that caused us to explore the "what is it like" to wear heels. For me, it began back to my earliest memories. Clomping around the house at the ripe old age of 2 or 3 years old, wearing a pair of my mothers shoes. I would them everywhere...even outside the back yard. I'm sure that both my mother and father thought that as I got older I'd soon outgrow the habit and move on to being a "normal" male child. I was, in fact, a normal male child in every way except that I wore my high heels as my normal shoes every where (almost) except to school. And, when I was in high school, I wore penny loafer style shoes with 2" to 4" heels as my every day footwear. While I never thought I was doing something wrong I knew that men wearing women's shoes wasn't looked upon as "normal" and frowned upon in some circles. Was I ashamed to be seen wearing a pair of pumps? Not really. But there were times when I recognized that it wasn't socially acceptable for men to wear women's shoes (or clothes) in public or around my mother and father (they both were aware of my love for high heels but never talked about it to me). It was during these times that I vowed to quit. I guess I was about 16 or 17 when I decided that I could never stop. I knew the desire would never go away completely. Oh, I could stop for a few weeks or months but I would see an attractive pair of heels and just have to buy them. It was at that age that I realized that I was fighting a losing battle and that I would never be able to stop. So, I vowed never to try to quit, again. And, to this day I never have. Nor have I ever again tried to analyze "why" I loved to wear high heels. The "why" was no longer important. I am the way I am and that's the way I am. However, this is just me. Everyone else has their own "story." Everyone has their own degree of constranation they must deal with. I've fought the battle, overcome the anxaities connected with wearing heels, explaining my desire to a prospective mate, being married and raising three children...and now, grandchildren. Given the circumstances, life for me, in this regard, is as perfect as it could be. I wear what I want to wear, using discression when called for and "stretching" the envelope when I think I can get away with it. Each individual must find their own comfort level. The level where the anxiety equals the level of satisfaction. Some members, like StilettoScott, Kneehighs, HappyFeat, JeffB, etc., recognized and faced their fears, made peace with themselves and found a level of participation with which they're comfortable. You can tell they have. It's in their descriptions of their "outings." They are secure within their own personality. Point of all of this being that we're each different. The onlly thing we really have in common is that we all wear women's shoes -- high heels. Each one of us has to do what we're comfortable with...nothing more, nothing less. And, for piece of mind, participation has to be a the level we can sustain in order to maintain our physichological welfare. Advancing at our own rate as we overcome our individual uncertanties and move on to the next level of participaton. Like I said. This is an individual thing. It isn't for any of us to critize or make light of another male heel wearer level of development. We can, of course relate our own experiences and give advice, but the individual must proceed at his own pace with the hope and expetation of reaching his goal, one day.

[AZShoeNut]

Wow, Bubba, you are right. It has only been during periods where I was more aware of the negetive image of those around me that I have wanted to "cure" my desire to wear heels. I too in my early twenties decided that I would not attempt to let this thing go either. I in fact decided to celebrate the experience and see the positive qualities of my uniqueness. The experience has become better and better ever since. Larry

[Hiline]

As bubba and other have said most have tryed to cure the whole heels thing but myself as most other here have ( i know this isnt the right word ) failed to do so. I tryed and tryed over around 10years to throw out any heels i had at the time and forget all about them. But it seemed i always went back to getting some more again. I've grown to feel now its apart of who i am even if it does seem alittle at odds with the rest of me if that makes sence? I dont feel the HUGE shame any more but i'm still not ready to let people know about my love of heels apart from on here . Thats about what i have to say on this........

[Tallinheels]

To be honest this is way i look at it I enjoy Heels and wearing them and dont see any point in trying to Cure something i enjoy

[dww]

Given up trying, only thing I can add is I was born with it and it don't go away.

[chris100575]

I tried to cure wearing heels. I went to see a therapist because I was having problems with my temper, and ended up discussing my (then) cross-dressing with her. I think I hoped that something would click into place and I'd start acting normally (as I saw it). After a few weeks I'd lost the desire to cross-dress and embraced my love of high heels. She helped me to see that wearing women's shoes was just a way of pampering myself, that it was harmless and that it wasn't something to worry about. The end result was that I wasn't cured of wearing high heels, but that I learned to accept it as something that was part of me and didn't hurt anybody. The only problems I've had have been with one of the women in my life, my ex wife couldn't accept it. It wasn't the reason we split, but I don't think it helped. My current GF has been an absolute star, she's not fazed at all and her acceptance of me clicking round the house in my stilettos is something I will be eternally grateful for.

[Tech]

Hey Chris Sounds like your therapist was spot on, high heels are "nice" and are considered as something in the "self pampering" range of things people buy themselves or wear simply because it feels good.. There really isnt anything more to it than that, just as some people like fine fabrics in their clothing, some like the luxuries in a nice car, others like to buy nice wines or foods, all in the name of pampering themselves.. At least with high heels we wont all get fat and drunk Fantasticly put I think, but of course this does mean now that you have single handedly brought this thread to a conclusion, and others reading it will probably only be able to agree, with little else to say??

[Pumps]

Does that mean you wont hear the result ? Sometimes I have the desire to go out in heels, but once out in public I just feel strange and want to go home. I figured doing something extreme like driving 900 km and only bringing my heels, would multiply that feeling and would turn me off the heels. That is not what happened. Instead I accepted that I would spend the next 3 days in heels and just enjoyed it. That was not what I expected. Even my engine overheating and me standing in the emergency lane in my heels, didn't made me panick. I had bought some comfortable 6,5 cm strappy heels for driving. So I did some sightseeing, shopping and went to the theater (the reason for going) in heels. For the theater I changed into my 4" t-bars pumps. The hotel staff were a sharp contrast to the horrible people in London. Very friendly, even though I was ALWAYS in heels. I'm sure they were snickering in the back, but did let on at all, unlike in London. The reaction from other people were the same as always. Shock and laughter. So, the experiment was a bust, but the trip was nice.

[Dawn HH]

Pumps:-) Don't let the snickering bother you as we all get that from time to time. If you think that your heels are co-ordinated with a great outfit and your goal is to go about your business and have some heeling fun, just smile at the snickerers and show them just how positive you are about what you want to wear. One thing to remember is that there isn't a cure for this thing that we do. It is built into us at birth and will always be there no matter what we do. So accept that you are that way, go with the flow, and have a ball heeling for the rest of your life. Cheers--- Dawn HH

[johnieheel]

I tried throwing them all away twice! They just came back. I tried praying it away. I am a very strong believer in GOD. That didn't do anything either. Every time I tried to loose it, I became very unhappy and new something was missing in me. then when I went out and bought a new pair, everything changed about me and I became myself and happy again. Like I was whole. Conclusion; I was born with it, thats the way God made me and I'm very happy with it. I am what I am and thats all that I am. If there aint nothin wrong with it...