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Posted

Roniheels has been working on a life size model of the Eiffel Tower made entirely from toothpicks. The intention is is that he'll sneak it into france and use it to replace the original which he can then sell for scrap. He has already done the same with the Blackpool Tower and the Statue of Liberty.

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.


Posted

A new cure for the common cold has been invented by Dr. Shoe whilst working in a labaratory in Tara mode. The breakthrough discovery while he was testing the effects of stress on natural blondes.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

Shyguy always replies to his PMs...

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Dr. Shoe is taking lessons in cookery from none other than Gordon Ramsey, who is taking lessons in clothing fashion and style from Tara in return.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

Stilettoscot qualified for this years Olympic in the discus throw. But he was disqualified when he went to make his final toss wearing 6" stiletto high heels.

Posted

Dr. Shoe is taking lessons in cookery from none other than Gordon Ramsey, who is taking lessons in clothing fashion and style from Tara in return.

Naw, you've got that wrong, shyguy. Dr Shoe is giving lessons on how to swear to Gordon Ramsay.

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

Posted

roniheels is currently nursing a black-eye, having been punched out while indulging himself in his alter-ego role of Gordon Ramsey.

When asked for a comment afterward, roni's reply was: "That bloke is a ****ing ******! If he hadn't blind sided me I would have ****ing killed the *******. If I ever meet him again I'll be cutting off his ****ing ***** and slow cook them before having them for lunch with a decent bottle of Chianti. :thumbsup:

Now, where did I leave that ****ing piece of steak?"

....

Posted

Fastfreddy had so much trouble learning to spell as a young man that he started to use asterisks where he wasn't sure of the spelling of a word. It makes it look as if his writing is peppered with swear words when in reality this ex Catholic school choirboy wouldn't even know any of the words other people assume are behind the asterisks.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

Shyguy's entire world is just an enclosure in some kind of alien intergalactic zoo...

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Stilettoscot is a scotsman who carried a thin dagger, hence his nick-name...

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Fast Freddy originally played the part on "Smokey and the Bandit" that Dom Dellouise played, until they heard his scratchy, throaty laugh. They then searched high and low and discovered Dom.

Walking in ultra-highs because it's exciting...and it is!!

Posted

Stilettoscot was the fashion advisor for the afore mentioned Smoky And The Bandit films, and it was because of stilettoscot that all the men had to wear cowboy boots. His original designs were stiletto heels for all male characters but was considered to be not macho enough for Burt Reynolds, and Sally Fields would have needed at least 7" heels to see eye to eye with anyone. It was to be stilettoscots last film work.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

Shyguy was so concerned at the thought of being seen out in Milton Keynes wearing (gasp!) high heels that he had all the shop windows boarded up so that even he couldn't see his shoes in reflection. (And, funnily enough, most of those shops then reported record sales of plywood but nothing much of anything else.)

Posted

Puffer got his nickname from his career as a childrens entertainer when he would make ballon animals. This made him feel out of breath, hence the nickname.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

Shyguy used to help out at the funfair. Once they ran out of coconuts... Hence his nickname and his permanent bed at St Mildred's...

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Patentheel mis-spelled his name when signing up, he'd been waiting patiently for 3 months for his first pair of heels from Ebay and meant to put Patientheel.

He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Posted

speaking as one whose drinking abilities are second only to his heelwearing abilities (both give the propensity to fall over), I know that Dr Shoe would like to fall into the Queens Arms at any time, whereas billyb, an american honey, has a sweet tooth (only the one, mind). I recommend St Mildreds as a place where the one can eat, drink, and be mary till the cows come home. The local cows are keen sailors, and, being as they had satnav and a milk cart (fitted with bull bars of course) were last seen heading for the Isle of Wight. Apparently it was Cowes week....

Posted

Thedesigner has just released a new country western CD under the stage name of cowpoke bloke. His big hit single is "Ma Get My Laso, There's a Cow in My Bed."

Posted

Roniheels is not obsessed by 6" heels in the slightest.

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Dr. Shoe is a volunteer fireman for his city's volunteer fire department. People come from miles around to put out a fire while he is dressed in a red vinyl fire fighter's suit while wearing red patent leather thigh boots with 7" high heels.

Posted

I once took roniheels on a tour of Liverpool. He insisted that we visit the famous 'Cavern Club' home of the legendary Beatles. He also insisted that he be allowed to wear a suit similar to the ones the Beatles wore with his favourite pair of high heeled boots. "Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away....."

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