pebblesf

Don : Would love to meet. 23rd Would be great. Weather on that date is predicted to be BAD. No sweat, let me know where you are staying, so we can meet early for breakfast and/or lunch. How late are you going to be here that day. Enough time for you to come here and try on some shoes? Do you prefer white patent or matt high heel boots? Mike

We are staying at the "Sonesta Columbus", am hoping that is closer to your home so you don't have to travel far.  I'm guessing our pick up will be around 3:30PM on Friday afternoon, so there is plenty of time for a "brunch" and perhaps a visit to your place.  Once again, don't want you driving far if the weather will be shitty.  Will give you a call tomorrow afternoon.  Don

Don : Looking forward to your call. I will map quest the location of (Sonest). I drove 18 wheelers for a living. There isn't much that is too far of a drive for me. 614-436-3880. Mike

Thank you, Pebbles. I most often wear something like this. It works for me, it works for my girlfriend. And I don't really care what everyone else thinks. 

I do get poked once a day or so by some stranger who expresses their admiration. In the beginning, it was flattering. But it is getting a bit disturbing, in the sense that if I'm doing something that people need to point out their admiration for that frequently, society isn't nearly as free as many of us would like to believe.

Well, you are right....Society would love to suppress anything that goes against "the norm", including guys in heels.  Society would also love us to cling to the usual stereotypes attached with guys wearing what society would describe as "feminine gear".  I'm sure constant attention can get annoying sometimes....Kind of like a celebrity trying to walk down main street on a Saturday afternoon....I believe that most guys have a secret desire to wear more 'feminine gear", but most don't have the guts to explore their desires.  The combination of feminine and masculine gear can be a very powerful look indeed, especially when a guy (like yourself) can pull it off successfully with enough confidence not to "care what everyone else thinks"!  I have made great strides in the past few years, with help and support of guys here.  I don't have the youthful figure to pull off much, but I feel comfortable now wearing stiletto boots with my levis publicly.  

I'm sure I would go out of my way to compliment you if I saw you out in public somewhere, although I do my best not to be rude or "creepy" about it...Am hoping you will put up with more compliments from guys and gals who appreciate the fact that men like yourself are helping to reshape the way society thinks, even if it is at a snail's pace.  You are fortunate to have a girl friend who appreciates your style, and is confident enough not to feel the her "femininity is threatened".   

Thanks for all you do buddy

Don

I'm back

Chosen after one of my favourite bands, Tame Impala. 

Do you know them?

And thanks!

Sorry, never heard of the band, but have owned a few of the cars!

If you can appreciate some psychedelic stuff, give this a try, a nice song of theirs!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wycjnCCgUes

Hi,

Thanks for the email. I apologize for the late reply! Things have been rather hectic with work lately. 

I am not offended by the "push back", at all. Actually, it is good to see an active board, that so many are willing to share their experiences, insight, etc. My feeling, is that everyone is entitled to their opinion. What works for me, may not always work for everyone else, and I get that. I've been very fortunate to have had some great relationships in my life, with women who accept my heel wearing. I continue to date, but I'm in no rush to find the next relationship. When/if it happens...it happens. I'm a very independent type of guy, anyhow. I love having a great gal in my life, but even when I am single, I'm cool with that too. Women come and go, and to be honest, I go through many periods, where it is actually nice, just to do my own thing, and not have to worry about explaining the whole heel thing to women. It's nice to just decide to take off, on a Friday or Saturday evening, and go heeling, without having to worry about a girlfriend. That being said, it is also nice to have a woman by my side, who accepts and understands that I enjoy heels. It's all good, either way. 

Mi totally agree with your email, especially what you wrote in the second to the last paragraph, about not needing to make concessions regarding our passions and things that define us. I'm a pretty cooperative guy, in life, and in my relationships. But when it comes to my heels, I just can't bring myself to bow down to some gal, who isn't or who can't bring herself to be on board with it. For me, it's just easier (and more beneficial) to simply not get involved with those women in the first place. I'm no George Clooney, but I've been lucky to look young for my age, keep myself in okay (but nowhere near perfect) shape, and maintain a strong, confident mindset, without becoming self-absorbed or arrogant. I've also been fortunate enough to have had many women in my life who are cool with the heel thing, so it makes me more intent on not settling, simply because I know there are enough women out there, who "get it". 

So, how is your heel wearing going? Do you wear heels in public? What has your overall experience been...have you had many people notice or compliment you, when you are out heeling? For me, it's pretty much a non-event. I go out in heels almost daily, and have been doing so for a while, so I'm not even really watching or paying attention to other's looks and reactions (unless they directly address me, or ask a question, or give a compliment). It wasn't always like that though! When I first started wearing heels in public, I was always on the lookout for people's reactions, and was obviously nervous to varrying degrees, depending on the heels I was wearing, and where I happened to be. Now, I pretty much just do it, and go about my business, without giving it much thought. But it took a while to get to that point. Do you have a wife/girlfriend, who knows, and who is supportive of your heel wearing? I am still new to this site, and still trying to figure out how to navigate and see prior posts from members, etc. each day, I seem to learn a bit more, about how this board works. I'm not the most tech-savvy guy, so I'm still learning. Lol

Thanks again!

Well, like most of us, I think I was born with the heel gene, have been attracted to high heel boots ever since I was a little kid.  Unfortunately, as a kid, I suffered with low self esteem, and guilt about sexual preference, so wasted too many years of my life away trying to deny being gay and crippling myself with guilt.  Wisdom truly does come with age, but nothing I can do to change my past.  I guess if I could have just one great accomplishment in life, I would love to be there for/help out a poor kid who is struggling emotionally the way I did until I was about 30yrs old.  The good news is that times have changed, so being gay isn't considered    such a shameful thing anymore. 

My relationships haven't been optimal, mostly due to "being my own worst enemy", as my Mom always told me I was.  My current partner of almost 20yrs HATES my love of boots, and I guess I understand to a certain degree, he sees my boots as "the other guy" in my life.  My mistake in this relationship was the classic one, not showing my love of boots right up front.  Sure, I always wore cowboy boots while dating, but never the 5" stiletto boots I longed for.  I allowed my love of boots to take a back seat, a mistake for sure, but am committed to this relationship now for life.  I know our relationship is messed up (most are), but I also know we love each other.  Anthony's mistake is making me feel guilty/foolish/shameful about my love if women's boots.  He would be well advised to "accept" my boots, because you and I both know they are a big part of my life that can not be changed/put aside.  I am surely willing to compromise, but ridicule just pushes me away. 

Fortunately, I work as a flight attendant, so I always have three extra pairs of boots with me on trips, nothing feels better than slipping into a favorite pair of boots as soon as I get into the hotel room.  I usually take a stroll to a nearby mall/restaurant, or just take a walk outside.  I don't have the balls to wear my boots over my levis, but feel good out and about even with the boots mostly hidden.  I have logged a couple of miles in 5" heels so can handle them pretty well, really want to move up to 6" heels though. 

Like you say, I am always hoping for positive comments, but am usually stunted by fear of being taunted or ridiculed.  I did great a cool reaction from a guy a few months back while in the elevator, "cool kicks" he said.  That really felt great even though he had been drinking, but the alcohol probably lowered his inhibitions allowing him to compliment me.  The worst reaction, at least the one I am aware of, was young girls giggling behind me on an escalator.  I know that most people are too busy, and self absorbed, to notice or care about what kind of footwear I am wearing.  I always look at guys from the shoes up, and mistakenly think that others do the same.  I am always looking for bootbuds to get out publicly with in our boots.  Confidence in numbers I guess, but it sure makes it much easier for me to put aside my inhibitions and get out there.  I met one guy in Seattle, we walked all over the city in our boots, and it was one of the best times of my life.  This fellow was taller, and looked great with his jeans tucked inside his boots, he walked faster in 5" heels than most people can in Nikes.  We stopped at many bars, even sports bars, our boots were evident, and felt great without a worry or concern. 

The good news is that self consciousness also declines with age, I have improved greatly over the years, even though nowhere close to where I want to be.  I decided to treat myself to a few booted hours out on my way home from work the other day.  I stopped at three thrift stores, found two decent pairs of boots in my size and one pair of levis.  I put the boots on in the store, wore them out (after paying), and through the other two thrift stores, almost forgot I had them on, except that I felt great. 

So, that is my messed up story, but I'm OK with it these days.  I'm glad you found us here, love reading about your adventures, and seeing the pictures, very informative and encouraging!

Don

Hi,

I'm sorry for the late reply. This has been a crazy couple of weeks, between work, Thanksgiving, and a recent death in my family. I'm hoping this week will be back to normal, so to speek...

I had a similar situation in a past relationship, with a woman who felt that herls were more important to me than she was. She was cool with the heel thing for the most part. She wore heels almost daily, so I think she understood why I liked them. However, there were many times when I could tell she resented the fact that to her, I seemed to like heels more than I liked her. Truth be told, as much as I valued my relationship with her (and we truly were each other's best friends), the heels were not going anywhere, and in the end, if I had to choose between a woman, and heels, I would choose heels! It probably sounds shallow of me, but women come and go, but I can't give up my heels. We ended up breaking up several years ago over something unrelated to heels. Let's just say we were both in different life stages, and as time went on, our age disparity became more and more of a factor. Not so much about the age gap itself, but because of the things we wanted to do in life. Anyhow, she was mostly cool with the heel thing, except when she thought they were more important to me than she was, and she would get kind of bitchy. She actually was the one who encouraged me to wear them in public more often. Up until her, I would wear them in public, but only in remote places, where no one was around, or where I could race back to my car, before anyone would see me wearing them. She basically said, "there's really no reason a guy can't wear heels if he wants to, and if you want to wear them when we go out, I'm fine with it." Her support was awesome! It was a huge confidence builder, having a gal who was willing to be seen with me, in public, while I was wearing heels. We began dating over 20 years ago, and I was candid with her about my liking of heels, from the beginning, which helped. In relationships prior to her, I kept it from them in the beginning, and it was not good for me, because when the did find out, it was usually an issue. Even if some of them "played along", and said they were cool with it, often they would go back on it, and later say they only said that at the time, because they did not want to get into an argument or whatever. I have no place in my life for that, these days. If they are not on board, I don't keep them around. It's different for you, perhaps, because you are in an established relationship, of over 20 years. I'm talking about new relationships, where I have little to nothing invested, and I can just replace them, with someone who is accepting of the heels.

that's awesome that you are a flight attendant, and get to wear heels when you travel! what type of reactions do you get from kids, women, and older people if/when they notice you are wearing heels? I was out heeling last night, I went all over, and even stopped in a small cafe for a coffee, where there were three older ladies sitting at one of the tables. When I was in line to ace my order, I noticed they were looking at my heels (I had 4" stiletto black boots on under my jeans), and they looked a few times, then looked at each other, and spoke to eachother, then looked back at my heels again. Once I got my coffee, I had to walk by their table to get a napkin on the service counter, and they all gave me a smile and looked at my boots again, but didn't say anything. They were kind of cool! Although earlier in the evening, I had one dude pull up at the gas pump next to me in s huge pickup,  when I was pumping gas, and he saw my heels and shot me a look of complete disgust! He didn't say anything, however. Lol I just tune those types of dudes out, and don't let it bother me, if they shoot me a strange look for wearing heels. They are the ones missing out, not me...

Hope all is well! Would love to hear about some of your heeling adventures, especially the types of reactions you get from various types of peoe, when they notice your heels. 

Saw a comment that you are in the airline industry.  Ever go to Denver or LA?  I have trips coming up, not firm yet, but probable.

I get to LA fairly often, Denver every once in awhile, lots of heel guys in both places!  Looking forward to hearing more about your adventures, nothing feels better than being out and about in the boots we love, even if they are covered by our levis!

Don

Just checking in with you, any trips coming up?  I remember you prefer not to meet up in Texas.  Don