Bubba136 Posted February 23, 2008 Posted February 23, 2008 I feel like a freak and a complete laughingstock. Hey Pumps! I'm surprised to read that post coming from you. After all of the times that you've worn pumps out and about. If what you say is true, I would guess there's only a couple of ways you can handle this situation: 1) You must determine if your feeling as a freak is more dominant than your desire to appear in public wearing high heels. If it is, you should stop wearing them outside of your house. 2) If you can't stop wearing them in public, find some way to regain your confidence and "get over it." One of the most steadfast and ardent high heel-wearing, long term members of this forum is Trolldeg. His ability to choose wonderfully appealing styles of high heels and his apparent willingness to wear them openly, without concern, is inspirational to us all. Since you also live in Sweden, would it be possible for the two of you to get together and talk through your fears with someone that has obviously overcome similar concerns? Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
Pumps Posted February 23, 2008 Posted February 23, 2008 It's due to my not so pleasent outing on Oxford Street. I just think I have to realize that I'm not one of the guys who can pull it of. For one thing I'm too fat and tall. I think it's great that some guys, like Kneehighs, can actually have cool responses from women, but it's just not for everyone. Hey Pumps! I'm surprised to read that post coming from you. After all of the times that you've worn pumps out and about. If what you say is true, I would guess there's only a couple of ways you can handle this situation: 1) You must determine if your feeling as a freak is more dominant than your desire to appear in public wearing high heels. If it is, you should stop wearing them outside of your house. 2) If you can't stop wearing them in public, find some way to regain your confidence and "get over it." One of the most steadfast and ardent high heel-wearing, long term members of this forum is Trolldeg. His ability to choose wonderfully appealing styles of high heels and his apparent willingness to wear them openly, without concern, is inspirational to us all. Since you also live in Sweden, would it be possible for the two of you to get together and talk through your fears with someone that has obviously overcome similar concerns?
PetePete Posted February 23, 2008 Posted February 23, 2008 Different, feminine, sexy, attractive, centre of attention. Same as everyone else I guess.
fastfreddy2 Posted February 23, 2008 Posted February 23, 2008 It's due to my not so pleasent outing on Oxford Street. I just think I have to realize that I'm not one of the guys who can pull it of. For one thing I'm too fat and tall. I think it's great that some guys, like Kneehighs, can actually have cool responses from women, but it's just not for everyone. I'm shocked. Can you tell us/me about this? If it's something you are not keen to share, perhaps a short message via PM. I plan to go there next Saturday, and I'm now a bit concerned. Too fat? Definitely not! Too tall? Again, not possible. You're a good looking lad (man). I would have thought you could carry anything off. I'm sure some loud-mouth could hurt your feelings if they chose too, and I experience that most weeks wearing flat shoes. [british drivers can be quite rude.] But hopefully this is a small backward step in a long and interesting journey forward? Take some time to get over the bad experience, and then bounce back. Nothing worth doing comes easy. ...
Histiletto Posted February 23, 2008 Posted February 23, 2008 How would you describe the feeling when your wearing heels? Do you feel any differently if so, how? Is it a sexual experience for you? If you want to know how I feel when wearing heels, I must first present some background into my state of mind. The social prohibition for men wearing heels is a conjured concept from some socialites thinking males shouldn't have this type of desire so that the trumped-up social ideals of masculinity would have some validity. Obviously, the gender concept is very misleading and does not take into account the versatility of each individual, whether man or woman. When at a young age, I was confronted with this concept and even then it didn't ring true for I knew who I was and I had those desires. So, I had lived with this misconception all my life, while I so desired to express and exhibit my feelings as I wore my choice of footwear. However, I perceived those around me as not being of the same mind, so I had to hide my desire and pretend to embrace this social attitude. Living in two worlds is not the healthiest mental environment, for you are always on guard and suspicious of everyone. You feel getting close to anyone will only cause hurt and sorrow. All of your relationships are on the surface, never telling anyone about your true desires. Having said this, there have been incidences where I did try to reach out and trust others, but we were unable to handle it properly, so we went separate ways. This has been my existence in a nut shell. I don't regret having this desire to wear heels, because it has given me far more insight into how and what human beings are. I do regret my ineptness to bring what I know is true to the social cognition, so that possibly society could correct its perceptions on what makes up a person. Finding this forum and some of the others has given me hope for the future when everyone won't have to worry about being who they are. Yes, some people seem to be catching a glimpse into this false idea that males can't have the same desires as females, and vice versa. So when I put on my heels, I am following through with the choices I have made to wear the styles that fulfill and complete the inner me. Yes, wearing heels gives me many of the other benefits you can read or have read about in this whole forum. You know - the height, the sexiness, the elation, and etc. stuff. However, wearing my choice of high heels is one of the results of who I am and wanting openly show how I prefer to attire. Eventually, when heeling is more accepted, I can quit this secret charade or pretense and just be me.
JeffB Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 A good thread. For starters, there's nothing sexual about my desire to wear heels, I want that understood from jump street. I feel bold and daring, even cocky at times, like I'm standing head and shoulders above the rest of the world (and, most of the time, I literally do, given how tall I am) when I wear heels, and that's a damn good feeling to have, one I never tire of experiencing. To be out and about in public while wearing women's shoes is an incredibly heady feeling, it's like I'm breaking barriers the rest of the world does all it can to keep in place, and I like the notion of doing all I can to bring down the walls of fashion narrowmindedness. Pumps: Sounds like you must've had a pretty bad outing. We've all been down that rotten road a time or two, and it's never a pleasant experience, so don't let that discourage you. As for your appearance, I see nothing wrong with it myself, Lord knows I'm no fashion model when it comes to good looks, but that doesn't stop me from going out, that should stop you either. If you feel you need to step back and re-evaluate yourself, then do so, don't allow yourself to wallow in self-pity, that's a bad place to hang at. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
rmaciej1983 Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 Different, feminine, sexy, attractive, centre of attention. Same as everyone else I guess. No as everyone. I don't want to be feminine. I'm a man and feel like a man even if i wear 5'' stiletos with nylons and skirt. And i don't want to be in centre of attention. I'm shy . Different and attractive yes. Wearing heels it is something amazing for me. In childhood i didn't even think that i will be wear stiletos in public. I like when some woman is wearing high heels and noticing me in my high heels. In that way she will be know that not only women like heels and not only women can walking in them. I'm masculinist .
PetePete Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 No as everyone. I don't want to be feminine. Fair point. It was a bit of a rushed post. I don't really see it as a black and white thing, male or female. For me, wearing heels is just a way of expressing part of the feminine side of my personality. Most of the time I'm happy being male I guess wearing heels does force you to think and question quite deeply about such things.
Firefox Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 I feel like a freak and a complete laughingstock. A woman wearing heels risks getting called a tart. Wearing heels as a guy you are being even more avant garde. You can't expect to blaze fashion trails without some comment.
rmaciej1983 Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 For me, wearing heels is just a way of expressing part of the feminine side of my personality. You are talking like a transvestite . Do you feel that on heels you are more feminine than in flat shoes? I think that it haven't connection with shoes or clothes. Clothes and sex are two different things, so i couldn't be more feminine by wearing heels. Maybe you are writing about social gender. It is unnatural for me. I accept only conceptions: biological sex and psychical sex. Most of the time I'm happy being male I'm very happy being male when i'm wearing my high heels:w00t2: .
wolf Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 No as everyone. I don't want to be feminine. I'm a man and feel like a man even if i wear 5'' stiletos with nylons and skirt. And i don't want to be in centre of attention. I'm shy . Different and attractive yes. Wearing heels it is something amazing for me. In childhood i didn't even think that i will be wear stiletos in public. I like when some woman is wearing high heels and noticing me in my high heels. In that way she will be know that not only women like heels and not only women can walking in them. I'm masculinist . I subscribe every single word
Pumps Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 I'm shocked. Can you tell us/me about this? If it's something you are not keen to share, perhaps a short message via PM. I plan to go there next Saturday, and I'm now a bit concerned. Didn't we talk about it at dinner at Sergios ?
xetal76 Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 I wear Fetish stilettos mostly for the feel of vulnerability...to date I`ve never had the courage to `go outside`, and my wife seems to think that I`m Gay! Also, I think that stilettos are a form of art...
MetalTips Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 What a question... Firstly I would like to compliment you and your gorgeous boots with the thinnest heels you posted in the girls section. Back to the question in hand - I dont think I will think too long over it otherwise it wouldnt be instinctive but I think I would say relaxed yet sensual!
johnieheel Posted February 25, 2008 Posted February 25, 2008 I feel like me in heels. I wear heels because I like the many different and exciting styles and the way they feel from the strappy heel to the toe and I also think men's shoes need little sails on them and turned loose in the ocean. real men wear heels
Ninanoora Posted February 25, 2008 Posted February 25, 2008 Thanks for answers I preciate and thank everyone answering to my questions, I believe questions were propably bit biased believing it would be more sexual experience for men I'm glad about answers, and the discussion in this thread. it was more like eye opener for myself aswell. For me, Heels make me feel more taller, more confident, stronger and more powerful, sex appeal = Power. Wearing heels change your posture a little bit aswell, to more sexy. I like to be in center of attention aswell, as someone wrote earlier. For me high heels represent feminity, sex appeal and aching feet Thank you, Nina. "Even when I'm a mess, I put on a vest... with an S on my chest, oh yes.. I'm a Superwoman.. "
thedesigner Posted February 25, 2008 Posted February 25, 2008 It's really wierd you had a bad experience in Oxford Street. I wear heels every time i go there and have had no bad comments, and thats at least once a month...
billyb Posted February 25, 2008 Posted February 25, 2008 For me it is the fit and feel of the shoe, mens shoes are like wearing a box, also I like the added height and how heels inprove my posture and I walk with more confidence.
ChipsHH Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 For me, it makes me feel confident in myself. Feel like I could be more outgoing with my friends, if they accept me, that is. It's like a complete new me when I have them on. I'm more conscious of my hygiene and outer look (clothing) and hopefully, block out what others think of me. It also makes me feel taller, as everyone should. Not taller than the world, unfortunately. I'm only 5'8" so the boost doesn't quite get me into the "hi-life" I would love to be in. Formally "HHDude"
Maximilian Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 - How would you describe the feeling when you're wearing heels? I believe that whether you are a man or a woman who enjoys wearing heels, we all feel more or less the same, i.e. sexy, confident, taller, powerful, have a foot ache after a while lol etc. I know I do. - Is it a sexual experience for you? It used to be, back in the days (late teens) when I wasn't too sure about why I liked wearing them. I was concerned if it had anything to do with my sexual preferences, me being a freak etc. Turned out that it had NOTHING to do with my sexual orientation. This forum has helped me a lot as well with that issue. Back to your question, for me it is purely a fashion experience. My fashion style is very diverse. Having a more feminine look, i.e. wearing high heels /skirts / skinny jeans is only but one style out of a few that I like. I just as much enjoy having: 1) A biker/macho look (leather jacket, cowboy boots, jeans) while not shaving for a few days 2) Clubing / rockstar look (leather pants that pretty much go with anything else) 3) Executive look (mens designer suits/shirts and wicked mens dress shoes) I'll admit that I love fashion (we hetro males are allowed to as well), I love talking about fashion, observing peoples fashion choices and more than all, I appreciate men/women who take the time to look their best and wear what they want in order to accomplish that. I may not agree with their choice but if I see that they took the time to try and look original or their best, they'll have my respect. When I dress up, no matter what style I choose for the day, as long as I feel I took the time to look my best, it makes me feel great and confident. Nobody could convince me otherwise. It's only sexual when I see an attractive woman sporting a very nice pair of heels that go well with her total look.
high_55 Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 How would you describe the feeling when your wearing heels? wonderful, simply wonderful. lets say sexier. Do you feel any differently if so, how? i feel free, it's being able to wear what you like. Is it a sexual experience for you? i guess it has to be a yes, because if you do it to feel sexier, it certainly must have to do with sex, i mean i love the way it makes a woman look, and, maybe that's the only reference i've got so far, so it's likely that when i wear them that's still the role model to follow, that is until it becomes more natural that men wear heels too, and maybe designers start fashion trends for us. in my experience so far, my wife say's she gets turned on when i wear heels, i've just recently gone out to the streets, about a month ago i began heeling in my office, but so far no comments to it. P.S. Sorry if these questions are already asked millions of times, I checked few pages on this forum section.
Bootking Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 For me, heels make me feel sexy, taller, more confident. It also has the element of the forbidden; going where you're not supposed to be going, crossing that fashion barrier so that a man's boring shoes/boots are replaced by great looking, sexy stuff. This is along the same lines as Alicia and Ninanoora that heels seem to equal sex appeal and power. It's all about the heel!
Arctic Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 I'm straight so for me it is simple: heeled boots for me: looks great to me (not a sexual experience) heeled boots on a good looking women: looks great but also as it is a good looking woman it enhances her sex appeal. What's all the fuss about?
shrimper Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 Thanks for answers I preciate and thank everyone answering to my questions, I believe questions were propably bit biased believing it would be more sexual experience for men I'm glad about answers, and the discussion in this thread. it was more like eye opener for myself aswell. For me, Heels make me feel more taller, more confident, stronger and more powerful, sex appeal = Power. Wearing heels change your posture a little bit aswell, to more sexy. I like to be in center of attention aswell, as someone wrote earlier. For me high heels represent feminity, sex appeal and aching feet Thank you, Nina. Nina, my relationship to womens shoes/heels started very early in my life. I remember as a 4 year old being jealous of the fact that my sister got the pretty shoes and I got brogues. My contacts with girls/womens shoes were all furtive and accompanied by what I now know to be sexual stimulations. Even after I reached the age of reason and puberty whenever I "borrowed" a pair of flats or heels there ensued a session that culminated in *#@**%. I had then and still have now the fantasy of wearing the shoes of my partner when making love, it is just such a turn-on for me. I was well into my twenties and married before I bought my first pair of shoes, black leather skimmer flats with a tiny wood heel. They were oh so heavenly to wear around the house. I have never gone beyond wearing at home and don't know that I will even though shoes built on a womans last fit me much better than any mens shoe. Depending on the style and manufacturer I generally get a very comfortable fit in womens 10.5W or 11M. Finding mens shoes in a B width is not easy at all.
denisegurl2 Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 Great thread! I luv all things about wearing heels - the feel, the look of my legs. And it gives me confidence!
Dan J Posted February 26, 2008 Posted February 26, 2008 Nina: Thank you for asking, great thread - definitely an eye-opener. When I've worn heels on boots only, it improves stature, forces me to walk straight. I wouldn't call it a sexual thing, but I do enjoy the experience. I agree with others: it is a statement, and may look better on some guys than others (possibly not much different than the women feel, perhaps??). I happen to have a small frame (for a guy): 5'9"/ 175cm, 130 lb/58kg, and a 29"/74cm waist. I've only had positive remarks, and very few, which I'm fine with, and only from the females. I feel sorry for the ones who have had a bad experience, but as some have pointed out, it goes with the territory. Dan
WhyNotMenToo Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 I love high heels boots and it's a fashion statement, Fashion Freedom for Men, live and let live. I also feel it's time to end gender based clothing that men should have the same fashion rights as the woman have enjoyed for 60 years. Equality in Fashion!
Blacksheep Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 Ilove wearing heels (still only when alone) but it feels really great. The biggest disapointment is when I have to take them off. I often wear them all day andthat is so awesome often wear them when driveing and even when driving a bus Blacksheep
roniheels Posted March 7, 2008 Posted March 7, 2008 I always wear a suit, a fedora hat, and my favorite high heels that match the suit and hat when I go out in public. I feel sexy, excited, handsom, and it is always fun, no matter what reaction I get from others. At first, negative reactions bothered me badly. Now, I know who I am, what I like and enjoy, and I try to be as fashion chic with my clothing and match my high heels with the wardrobe I wear. I hope I answered your question. And thank you for asking.
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