Cali World

[mlroseplant]

A couple of Vietnamese women friends of mine, who happen to be from the same neighborhood in Saigon, both love to wear heels, but they refuse to wear heels higher than about 3 1/2 inches. Maybe approaching 4. Certainly nothing higher than that. The reason they won't is perhaps not what you expect. When they wear super high heels, their calf muscles protrude noticeably, the way that a body builder's do (though not to that extreme, obviously). They find this objectionable. For whatever reason, although my calf muscles are well defined and toned, they are not bulky, even on tiptoe. Therefore, they desire calves that look more like mine. However, I think they are quite happy to do without looking like the rest of me.

[Shyheels]

I know that the first time I wore five inch stilettos, my calf muscles got the best workout I’ve ever had

[Cali]

Today was another "Mess with Your Mind Thursday".  Tempertures were in the 90's (F) but I wore my blue (faux) suede knee high boots.  (I also work in an air conditioned place.)  At work I got many compliments, then after work I had a doctor's appointment. As I was sitting in the waiting area, another patient came into the waiting area.  As she sat down she made a comment about my heels. Didn't hear it, so I asked "What?"

She said "your ankles must be killing you in those heels."

"I only wear heels that fit, I've been in these for over 8 hours today with no pain. You should never wear shoes that hurt."

"Guess I've been doing it wrong."

The nurse came and got me to take me to the exam room. On the way she said "I love your boots."

just another day in my universe: Cali World 😁

 

Edited July 14, 2023 by Cali

[Shyheels]

Interesting interactions. I wonder a bit if the first woman’s comment - I guess I’ve been doing it wrong - was meant to be sarcastic or ironic. Not having heard her tone or seen her face I can only guess but the words as written could come across that way. Or possibly resentful.

I think we (as a group) put much more thought into getting heels that fit and learning to walk in them that a lot if women who buy heels because they feel obliged but are not interested or invested enough to do more than put them on their feet and hope for the best.  

[mlroseplant]

Some years ago, I said to myself, "One of these days I'm going to find out whether high heels really hurt as bad as many women say." I can tell you that the answer is yes, but I was doing it wrong. At least on a couple of memorable occasions.

[Jkrenzer]

Agreed. Well fitting heels is the key. Seems most people tend to wear something a bit too small.

Can't say I haven't, but no more. If they don't fit they go away.

[StilettoLuv]

I would add that the frequency of wearing high heels has a huge impact on comfort (or discomfort). Consider the people that put on high heels only for the most special events... Date night...a wedding... a company party... etc. Those people's feet are going to be tense as soon as they take their first steps... and that tension will hasten the onset of discomfort. Those on the other hand, that wear high heels in their normal day-to-day activities feel far more relaxed when they put their high heels on and I believe that is why many can comfortably wear them. If I spend a busy day on my feet, I do not have pain.. but I will admit my feet feel tired and somewhat stressed.

[Cali]

Another question I get is "Where do you find your shoes?"

Most women think men all have large feet.  I don't, I have a very standard size 10 (US-women) sometings 11 feet.

So when I tell then DSW, Macy's, mall name brand stores, and websites such as Jessica Simpson, Steve Madden, 9 West, etc. they are usually surprise that it's so mainstream.

I'm finding good fitting heels in some of the same places they can also shop. I'm not doing anything that they can't do themselves.

[Shyheels]

Again, you have a serious and intelligent interest in heels, backed up by a willingness to take the time to do it right, whereas theirs is just passing and driven by expediency and obligation to wear heels in certain circumstances. 

[Jkrenzer]

True, I wear my heels almost all time. I don't see the need to dress up just to wear sexy stilettos. I'm just wearing them like most people wear trainers. So, I make sure they fit right.

[mlroseplant]

16 hours ago, StilettoLuv said:

I would add that the frequency of wearing high heels has a huge impact on comfort (or discomfort). Consider the people that put on high heels only for the most special events... Date night...a wedding... a company party... etc. Those people's feet are going to be tense as soon as they take their first steps... and that tension will hasten the onset of discomfort. Those on the other hand, that wear high heels in their normal day-to-day activities feel far more relaxed when they put their high heels on and I believe that is why many can comfortably wear them. If I spend a busy day on my feet, I do not have pain.. but I will admit my feet feel tired and somewhat stressed.

That has been my point all along, is that if you don't wear them, and wear them a lot, you're never going to get to the point where they're comfortable, even if they fit perfectly. This is particularly true once you get above 3 inches. My preferred method of conditioning is walking around my neighborhood. I won't say I do it daily, but several times a week. It really does make a huge difference. When I mention this to the women who have engaged me in conversation, it's like I'm from another planet. "What, you are actually suggesting that I wear heels while walking the dog? That's insane!" Yes, that is exactly what I'm recommending.

As far as having tired feet at the end of the day, you would have that in flats anyway. There is a big difference between tired and hurting.

[Shyheels]

I can see your point about wearing heels to walk the dog - and I can see hers as well. For most people heels, especially higher heels, are dress shoes, big occasion shoes, not for everyday. Which is of course why they are widely perceived to be uncomfortable since, to be comfortable in heels, one needs to be wearing them regularly. And few people do that.

It’s kind of an endless loop - people don’t wear heels because they are perceived to be uncomfortable, and because they are perceived uncomfortable people don’t wear them regularly. A difficult cycle to break. We happen to like wearing heels and so we put in the efforts.

Even women who fancy the styling of high heels and aspire to wear them may give up on the idea if they are not comfortable at once - that is the nature of expectation in our society.

I see this in cycling. I have an old school Brooks leather saddle in my tourer - a true classic - and while a lot of newcomers to cycling love the look and the idea of these classic saddles they are not always willing to endure the breaking in period. I never found it to be that hard myself - I’ve ridden on nothing but Brooks saddles for nearly 40 years - but to hear the griping on cycling forums you’d think they were torture implements. 

[Puffer]

2 hours ago, Shyheels said:

I can see your point about wearing heels to walk the dog - and I can see hers as well. For most people heels, especially higher heels, are dress shoes, big occasion shoes, not for everyday. Which is of course why they are widely perceived to be uncomfortable since, to be comfortable in heels, one needs to be wearing them regularly. And few people do that.

It’s kind of an endless loop - people don’t wear heels because they are perceived to be uncomfortable, and because they are perceived uncomfortable people don’t wear them regularly. A difficult cycle to break. We happen to like wearing heels and so we put in the efforts.

...

All too true, alas, in current and recent times.   Turn the clock back to the early '60s and most UK women (almost regardless of age/occupation) were wearing modest stilettos (3 - 3.5") for everyday activity - work, shopping, socialising - and very often around the house too.   They not only were used to such heels but had little difficulty in transitioning to the higher (4"+) heels that were frequently worn for 'dressier' occasions.

[pebblesf]

4 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

That has been my point all along, is that if you don't wear them, and wear them a lot, you're never going to get to the point where they're comfortable, even if they fit perfectly. This is particularly true once you get above 3 inches. My preferred method of conditioning is walking around my neighborhood. I won't say I do it daily, but several times a week. It really does make a huge difference. When I mention this to the women who have engaged me in conversation, it's like I'm from another planet. "What, you are actually suggesting that I wear heels while walking the dog? That's insane!" Yes, that is exactly what I'm recommending.

As far as having tired feet at the end of the day, you would have that in flats anyway. There is a big difference between tired and hurting.

Good point.  My feet get sore just wearing regular cowboy boots all day for work, so some soreness while in my high heel boots is normal and to be expected.  

[Cali]

I felt like channeling my inner Elvis and wore these blue suede JS stilettos today.

A woman walking her dogs in front of my house said "oh those are cute."  😁

Edited July 26, 2023 by Cali

[Shyheels]

I've a fondnes for ankle boots - and those look nice. I've several pair of suede knee and OTK boots but I'm always so leery of wearing them out except on the very nicest days. Over here rain can come out of nowhere.

[Cali]

It was 90 degrees today with no sign of rain.

[Shyheels]

It can get that warm here although rarely and there can be no sign of rain - until about five minutes before the cloud creeps over the horizon, lowers the temperature thirty degrees and drops an inch of rain and hail

[mlroseplant]

8 hours ago, Cali said:

I felt like channeling my inner Elvis and wore these blue suede JS stilettos today.

A woman walking her dogs in front of my house said "oh those are cute."  😁

Are you quite sure you weren't channeling your inner Carl Perkins?

[Cali]

4 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Are you quite sure you weren't channeling your inner Carl Perkins?

"Well, it's one for the money two for the show
Three to get ready now go, cat, go
But don't you step on my blue suede shoes
Well you can do anything but ..."

No, it was the 1956 cover by Elvis.

[mlroseplant]

19 hours ago, Cali said:

"Well, it's one for the money two for the show
Three to get ready now go, cat, go
But don't you step on my blue suede shoes
Well you can do anything but ..."

No, it was the 1956 cover by Elvis.

I assume that you are stating your preference, but I personally prefer the Carl Perkins version. In any case, if I were to going to wear blue suede today, it would be sandals.

[Cali]

I don't have blue suede sandal, just those stilettos and some (almost) knee high boots.

[Jkrenzer]

7 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

I assume that you are stating your preference, but I personally prefer the Carl Perkins version. In any case, if I were to going to wear blue suede today, it would be sandals.

Who is Carl Perkins?

[mlroseplant]

5 hours ago, Jkrenzer said:

Who is Carl Perkins?

Carl Perkins is the man who actually wrote the song. Elvis made it rather more famous a year later. 

[pebblesf]

On 7/25/2023 at 9:46 PM, Cali said:

I felt like channeling my inner Elvis and wore these blue suede JS stilettos today.

A woman walking her dogs in front of my house said "oh those are cute."  😁

Great looking ankle boots indeed

[Jkrenzer]

3 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Carl Perkins is the man who actually wrote the song. Elvis made it rather more famous a year later. 

Thanks, how it works in the real world. Delivery is more important than creativity. 

[Cali]

Had an interesting day yesterday. Since it was the last "Mess with Your Mind Thursday” of the summer. (I have a 3-week vacation coming up.)  I started off the day with my suede knee high Jessica Simpson stilettoes and shorts. It’s amazing how this is just a normal summer look for me a work.

I wanted to go to an afternoon retirement celebration and didn’t want my heels to distract, so I changed my outfit into long pants and “mild” FreeBird booties – still 4-inchers. A lot of higher administration at this retirement. The organizer of this event is a short VP that always compares her stilettoes to my heels., and she asked, “why no stilettos?’ I told her they were in the car, which they were. She had een me on Tuesday in the blue suede stilettos (above).

Later, a short (<5 foot) Vietnamese women came over and complimented my heels. She told me she loved heels, but she can only wear them for 2 – 3 hours before her back hurts and wonder how I could do it.  I started to tell her, but we were interrupted and never got back to it.  

On the way out another woman stopped me and told me how much she liked the heels I had on. She told me her favorite were stilettos by Jessica Simp – something, not thinking I would know them. I said “You mean Jessica Simpson, I love her stilettos, in fact I have a pair Jessica Simpson knee highs in my car.” We chit-chat-ed a bit more, but I was on my way out and needed to leave.

 

Should I have worn by knee highs to this event?

[Shyheels]

Perhaps, with the knee highs, but not with shorts. I think a lot of people would consider shorts too informal for something like a retirement party. I like your boots though

Sounds like you had some very pleasant encounters - but then not too surprising. You’re a very good advertisement for men in heels. 

[Cali]

I considered wearing the skinny jeans and knee highs.  

Today the nurse told she remembers me from the last time in early February when I had boots and skinny jeans. She was jealous I was so skinny. I just had to laugh.

Edited July 29, 2023 by Cali

[Jkrenzer]

People who see me only occasionally often remember me. Has to be because they see me in real 5 inch stiletto heels. It does leave a mark.

I love it and own it like you Cali and Melrose among a few others here.