A test of one's awareness and confidence

[HappyinHeels]

Hi All,

Last Friday (9th June I picked up my "Gwyni" wedges from the Aldo store and wore them out of the store I was so happy with them but forgot to bring my phone inside the store. Yesterday (12th June) I went by the store and asked Jackie, the manager I've know for a few years now, to take my picture with the new wedges and she gleefully did. Then her associate Maria also came over and complimented me on a great purchase. I'll post this picture soon. I walked out the store and could hear someone behind me about 50 feet/15m or so and he got into the van parked right next to me. Sitting at the driver's wheel was a woman who had to have seen me. I don't have a beard but do have a smaller moustache. I had on bootcut jeans, a tangerine polo shirt, a thinner strap watch, and my new Aldo "Gwyni" 5.5" wedge sandals. Just opened my car door and got in but it was still an exercise in adapting on the fly. I had never had this exact thing happen to me before but it is a lesson in keeping your focus and not letting anything break your stride. Remember act like you belong and from that point forward the confidence only builds. HappyinHeels  

[nzfreestyler]

Good story.

True advice as well. I vouch for that from my experiences too.

Confidence is the key. People sense weaknesses, mean people (usually use this to pick on others.

Show no fear, exude confidence (well said above - "Act like you belong" above from HappyInHeels) and your experiences will be positive.

Crudely think of it like animal behaviour. In a confontation there is a bit of staring at each other before a fight errupts. The first animal to look away usually is chased by the other and a fight ensues. If you cower, or try to hide etc when wearing high heels then you'll be chased. If you put your shoulders back, head high and walk like you own the runway, look people in the eye -  then you won't get chased.

Cripes half the people nowadays won't even reply Hi to a stranger if they're out walking ! A lot of people lack social skills, and there's a lot of basic/ primitive behaviours.

[Shyheels]

I cycle a lot very early in the mornings and sometimes I encounter other cyclists.. even though it is very early, and there is nobody else on these lonely country roads,  often you will get no response if you say hello. They pedal on, grim faced, pointedly ignoring you.

[nzfreestyler]

Thats why I am very loud and often yell Hi, or Hello to ensure I get a response when I'm out training.I don't quite jump up and down in front of people but I feel it borders on that at times! Biggest thing is people can't look each other in the eye. An acknowledgement either verbal or through gesture is appropriate and polite. I worry about those that wear headphones while walking/running/ cylcing and don't look up at people etc... They're asking to be become a victim of some crazy person, or get hit from behind because they can't hear a vehicle approaching etc...

[Shyheels]

I know. I see it all the time. It amazes me more of these doofuses aren't killed.

[Thighbootguy]

59 minutes ago, Shyheels said:

I know. I see it all the time. It amazes me more of these doofuses aren't killed.

I used to bike a lot (in boots) so I notice cyclists.  I live on hill on a state route that is very popular with serious cyclist (touring bikes, some for serious $) and they generally acknowledge my greeting, at least the ones going up the hill do when coming down they are too busy.  This road is also busy with cars/trucks but they share the road.  I have never seen a cyclist with headphones/earbuds, but a couple times I have seen teenagers, riding on the sidewalk, on mountain style bikes with one hand on the handlebars and chatting away into a cell phone in the other hand. I wonder from where they learned that?

[Shyheels]

Over here I see cyclists wearing earbuds routinely in traffic - so often I would say it is the norm.

I used to participate in a cycling forum (a couple actually) and mentioned once that I thought that riding with earbuds, especially in traffic, was rather foolish and was promptly howled down wth an astonishing amount of hostility (cycling forums are nowhere near as open and friendly as HHP)  

I ride thousands of miles a year - on flat pedals, not clipless, so I could wear any kind of footwear I please, although I've never worn boots while riding  

Edited June 14, 2017 by Shyheels

[nzfreestyler]

I only ride a bike off road (sometimes gravel roads but mainly no roads), I used to have 2 roadbikes which I rode everywhere on ages back - and I've never used earphones 

I did think of drilling some SPD cleat fittings into an older pair of high heels for fun.... but thats just silly! But the idea keeps coming back...

[mlroseplant]

9 hours ago, HappyinHeels said:

Hi All,

Last Friday (9th June I picked up my "Gwyni" wedges from the Aldo store and wore them out of the store I was so happy with them but forgot to bring my phone inside the store. Yesterday (12th June) I went by the store and asked Jackie, the manager I've know for a few years now, to take my picture with the new wedges and she gleefully did. Then her associate Maria also came over and complimented me on a great purchase. I'll post this picture soon. I walked out the store and could hear someone behind me about 50 feet/15m or so and he got into the van parked right next to me. Sitting at the driver's wheel was a woman who had to have seen me. I don't have a beard but do have a smaller moustache. I had on bootcut jeans, a tangerine polo shirt, a thinner strap watch, and my new Aldo "Gwyni" 5.5" wedge sandals. Just opened my car door and got in but it was still an exercise in adapting on the fly. I had never had this exact thing happen to me before but it is a lesson in keeping your focus and not letting anything break your stride. Remember act like you belong and from that point forward the confidence only builds. HappyinHeels  

Forgive me for being a little thick, but I don't quite understand what happened. You were in the Aldo store, you left the Aldo store, someone was behind you, and happened to be parked right next to you in the parking lot. I must be missing something. Was this person following you on purpose? I don't get what there was to adapt to or focus on specifically.

Naturally, one should always be aware of his/her surroundings, that's just good sense, but I don't quite get the gist of this particular story. Could you please explain further?

[Shyheels]

I didn't get it either

[HappyinHeels]

Imagine yourself between someone behind you and then getting into your car just 3 feet from someone sitting in the driver's seat who wasn't there when you pulled in. My point is I became aware I was being seen from two different perspectives within seconds of each other. It might rattle you if you were uneasy but it didn't me. It was still a surprise. No, I think it was just coincidence a guy behind me left the store at the same time and got into the car right next to me as his wife waited for him. As many of our members are somewhat concerned about being seen I wanted to reassure them chance things like this are going to happen but confidence will get them through it since they are not  doing anything wrong.

Mlroseplant: You stand tall as you have supreme confidence so this doesn't apply to you. This is simply an example of the type of thing which will happen as a guy moves among the pubic, one heel at a time.  I hope that clarifies it

HappyinHeels

[SF]

OK, I was in the same fix as the others.....   Got it now.....   thanks.....   I have had similar experiences, be confident, it's just heels....   have fun, sf

[Cali]

When you wear 4+ inch heels with shorts you are "seen". In the summer I do everything in heels and shorts. You have to have confidence!

[mlroseplant]

Ok, I get the point now! Before, I got the idea that you were talking about being aware from a safety standpoint, much like we stress in the construction industry, to avoid getting run over by a dump truck, or on the street, avoiding situations where we might come to some harm by traffic, or by people. I see now it was somewhat less complicated and less sinister than I thought. Thanks for the clarification!

[HappyinHeels]

You're all welcome. Normally I am articulate the first time but, on occasion, I have to explain something a second to correct what I couldn't do right the first time. I'm imperfect..... but my heels are impeccable    HappyinHeels