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Do You Ever Have Doubts?


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I am a UK11 also. You should find that a USW13 will be a reasonable fit, possibly better in a wide fitting, but much will depend on the make and style. With very high heels, a USW14 is likely to be needed. The nearest equivalent to Payless in the UK is probably Priceless (or its sister company, Big Shoe Boutique - same range). Although they do (or did) supply quite a number of shoes and boots up to UK11, some are poorly sized and likely to be too small. The 'Sherbert' label seems reasonably reliable - I have three pairs of boots in UK11 which are a very good fit. Unfortunately, the companies are in administration and, although still trading, seem to have stopped importing anything in UK11 and there are very few styles currently available. Evans also did offer some items in UK11 (although not always a true fit) but the largest now available seem to be UK10, although I understand that these can run big and will fit as though UK11! Priceless and Evans both do mail order and returns are not a problem. I suggest you investigate; good luck!

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Take your broken heels to a cobbler and get them repaired. I have a few heels that I would die if they broke, because they are out of stock, are are probably rare now.

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Shafed, What were your recent bad experiences?? I enjoy being out in heels too, it's fun and most of the time uneventful. But yes, there are times that some folks say or do something dumb to make the experience less than pleasant. Fortunately these times are very few... sf

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Sure, I have doubts sometimes, but then again, I have doubts about most things from time to time...I'm sure my occasional doubts are subconciously inflicted by societal stuff...But, like everyone has said, no way I can deny what makes me feel so good...

You are definitely not alone buddy...

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Shafed, What were your recent bad experiences?? I enjoy being out in heels too, it's fun and most of the time uneventful. But yes, there are times that some folks say or do something dumb to make the experience less than pleasant. Fortunately these times are very few... sf

Post #522 here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/page__st__520#entry294783

Post #517 here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/page__st__500

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Doubts? Hmm..

Im of a different mindset them most from recent experiences. My ' value ' system and what really maters to myself is MUCH different then what most people have for their own.

I used to have these ' doubts ' about some things and now.. I realize most of those things really dont matter.

So.. from the original post in this thread:

Do any off you ever have doubts about wearing high heels?

As of present.. Nope. They ( heels ) are just an article of clothing that I have. No different then t-shirts, jeans, harem pants, 2 or 3 skirts.. just something I can put on when I feel like wearing them. They arent thermonuclear devices or machine guns.. they are just ' shoes '.

Have to admit I do sometimes.

I Just have these periods when doubts come and I think:

Why do I want to wear high heels?

Why do we breathe air? Its not because we WANT to, its just something we do. ;) Im sure we have all been in a room when someone has ripped a ' ripe one ' and we REALLY didnt want to breathe the air!! Yet we did :( .

I dont know why you might want to wear heels. I dont know why anyone else would. Maybe a fetish, maybe a sought after look or as a fashion statement.. For myself, It was a ' why not try it ' type of thing. I tried it, I liked the concept and now its a thing I do without much thought at all.

Isn't life easier without having to want to wear high heels?

Life with heels is no obstacle at all from my perspective. ' easier ' is a viewpoint that we as individuals construct a definition for.

We might believe ' easier ' to be not having anyone making fun of us or having a million dollars to buy whatever we wanted or to be able to live carefree for the rest of our lives..

Just wondering if I'm alone in this?

No, your not alone, ever. No matter what you do, someone will be in the same mindset as yourself and there will be others whom will enter such a state in the future. There have already been those whom have carried on and moved forward from where you are at now.

Doubts? I might have given serious thought to going out in certain items of clothing a while back but it didnt stop me when I decided I was going to do it. Presently.. none. Theres no need to doubt what Im doing as I have been out and about in so many different shoes/boots/sneakers that the ' thrill ' or ' excitement ' has somewhat worn off.

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I had doubts prior to buying my first heels and was a little apprehensive about buying my first pair of heels. Once I bought my first pair however and wore them for the first time I have not had any doubts about wearing heels.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Great topic FreshinHeels

Yes I do and I have been asking myself that for years which would explain all the times that I have binged and then thrown out many nice pairs of heels.

I too agree that if I could ignore the issue -life would be so easier but then those heels pull at me again and I'm back to them. But then when I get to wear them-I feel great and the the doubt starts again. It's a circle that I have been doing for many years now.

Me too. Once I finally accepted it, I took time to get something that I liked (Oxfords). I'm just a man who likes wearing (very high) heels.

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Sadly I have doubts all the time which keep me from heeling, posting here and doing a lot of things that I enjoy. I also have a closet full of boots, a supportive wife and this forum. Keep your chin up, we found this group for a reason!

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Do any off you ever have doubts about wearing high heels?

This could lead off into a lot of areas where doubts are possible like: why I wear high heels, should I wear high heels, where should I go wearing high heels, are other people concerned that I wear high heels… Almost any of the questions posed on this board can be a source of doubt.

But taking the question as is, I have very few doubts about wearing high heels. I’m mostly concern about where I’m going and who I’m expecting to be there. ie. Other people’s reactions/alarm about seeing a guy (specifically me) wearing heels. I really don’t care what most people think, but there are a few that I don’t want to challenge with that extreme/different/strange of an idea or presentation.

TBG doesn’t have any doubts about wearing thigh boots with 4-5” heels anywhere, anytime. Fortunately I’m still have some concerns and control about where I go wearing heels. (Wrenching that control back was chronicled in Thigh Boots In Public.) I do wear heels at work, and when I’m out and about but I have backed off from wearing heels around the music community I’m involved with. That may seem strange considering how open minded most musicians are, but it was a decision I made and I want to stick with it.

These images (that I have on my PC desktop at work) kind of sum things up:

post-928-133522893173_thumb.gif

post-928-133522893178_thumb.gif

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I had doubts when I first started wearing high heels in public. I looked at it as an adventure and not sure how I would react to people's reactions to me being seen wearing high heels in public. Finally, after many outings after many years, I really now don't give it a second thought. It's something I enjoy doing and I respect whatever people think of me.
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My three-year long relationship just ended recently due to my significant other half being unable to accept my desire to wear high heels. I thought she would grow to understand and support, but instead she wanted to "cure" me, by wearing more high heels herself. Unfortunately, this has caused quite a lot of damage over time for me as I wanted to meet her expectations and gave myself up quite a bit in the process. Now that we've broken up, my current girlfriend also has a hard time accepting it and I seem to struggle to find people who are open enough to accept and support. So I am constantly in doubt, part of me wants it gone, another part of me wants to live it. For now, I've put it in the "live it, but only for myself" part of my brain.

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I'm no relationship expert, so this is just my opinion. Live life you yourself. Other people are supposed to compliment your life, not turn it upside down. Its a big world out there. You will eventually meet someone that respects you for you.

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Thanks for sharing your feelings so honestly ptom19, I'd guess a lot of readers can relate to that. It's a big demand to put on a partner who isn't prepared for it, but we shouldn't have to suppress who we are because of widespread prejudice. We just have to search a lot harder to find someone that, like pumpcat says, respects you for you... and in the meantime the difficulties teach us to better reciprocate that respect. Good luck to you.

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Ptom, Sorry to hear your relationship ended, but it was probably for the best if she couldn't accept an important part of who you are. And it's too bad your current gf can't get her head around it either. They both aren't for you, but step back and look at the situation. Two women is not a large sampling. You can't allow yourself to get discouraged. There are a LOT of stories and accounts on here about women who are very supportive and positive. Read Kneehighs, Mal in Australia, Bluejay, and other's accounts of such women. Wear your heels proudly and openly and women who like heels on guys will self-select. You'll be amazed. Those women see guys wearing heels as confident, and confidence is sexy and attractive to them. There are lots of fish in the sea. Put on your heels and go fishing! Let us know what you catch! Steve

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Thanks for the support that helps a lot, as I had similar feelings myself. What all three of you say is very true! I cannot imagine myself with someone who doesn't accept it. I tried to suppress it and I realised I stops making me who I am. Odd story, but because we both used to dance, and in one conversation, she asked me if I could only put them on once a week or so. I responded to her by asking her how she would feel if I told her she could only dance once a week...Unfortunately, my ex-girlfriend deduced that my love for heels was stronger than my love for her. Just sharing this as many may be able to relate. All those stories and encouragement helps a lot, so thank you! I'm slowly building up the courage to be able to go outside, though I have yet to actually make the leap. I missed the obvious oppurtunity at Halloween and I think I still need to practice for a general walk in public! :-)

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Actually, it's a good thing you missed Halloween. If you wear heels then, nobody would take you seriously afterward - they'd think it was just a costume and a one-time prank. Wearing heels when it ISN'T Halloween sends the message that you're serious about it and have the confidence and guts to do it. And yes, learning to walk elegantly in heels is extremely important, both to bolster your own confidence and to impress others. If you walk like a teenager in her first heels, you're not going to catch any fish. Steve

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I also have to admit that have doubts. It was so bad about three years ago. I actually threw a number of high heels away, regrettably. Even some pairs that cannot be found anywhere. HHPLACE.ORG and my current wife have helped in the past few years. There are still some times here and there where I'm just thinking, "why?". And I do not wear heels out in public. I wore platform boots with a black utilitikilt on stage during a gig. A lot of girls thought I looked really cute and really wanted my boots. That was a fun night.

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