Here is a real women's opinion on men in heels.

[Mr. X]

I am a pro wrestling fan and I discovered that one of the females was selling a pair of her shoes on ebay. So I inquired about them and asked some generic questions regarding the shoes. My main question was the heel height which was lacking/absent from the "ad." At this point she did not know my gender. Here was her reply. "Actual heel is 3". Are you planning on wearing them?" That is when I decided to let the cat out of the bag so to speak and get her opinion on men wearing heels. So here was my next reply. "As hot as those shoes are I cannot wear them because they are not my size. But if you have any 9 1/2's you would like to send my way by all means....lol. But now for a serious question. A women's opinion would be much appreciated. And I would love to relay the info to others in my situation. What are your thoughts on men wearing high heels?(not to sound creepy or anything) The reason I ask is because there is a growing number of men out there who wear them, myself included. But for a lot of men wearing them is not a fetish thing, myself included. There is a growing number of websites and pictures devoted to the art of "freestyling" or "heeling" as it is called. And with the right outfit heels can look very good on a man. I know it is not "common place." And I think that is what scares or weirds out alot of people on the subject. But there was a time when earrings where not norm for men either. Opinion please. And would you date a man who wore heels? Thanks! " And here is her final reply. "I believe women's high heels should be worn only by women, not men. I personally would not date any man who wears women's shoes. You may try and justify that it's perfectly normal...but in reality it's not...unless of course you are an openly gay man." It's the way I knew the conversation would go and the answer I would receive. But its not the way I wanted the conversation to go or the answer I was looking for.

[ShoeDre]

I don't know why so many guys here find it important to get the approval of women on this subject. If you want to wear heels, just do it. Have the courage to be who you are. Acceptance is not something to be negotiated.

[Arctic]

What did you expect asking such a thing as an anonymous person on eBay?

[sscotty727]

If I can add my 2 cents on this issue. I've stayed quiet on this topic for a while because I am wearing descrete heels and don't wear obvious heels out in public. Not because I am ashamed or afraid to go out in public wearing them, but out of respect for my wife and family. She doesn't like seeing me in heels, so I don't push it with her and chose instead to wear descrete heels. But alot of people here seem to think there needs to be some kind of "acceptance" in public to men wearing heels. Sadly, that isn't going to happen with people already against men wearing heels. You have to accept some people are open to it and most others aren't. If someone changes their views, it won't be by fighting for "the cause". There is no law that I know of in most of the countries represented here on hhplace. I know some strick Muslim countries probably do, but people in the US and UK and other like democracies, there is no law against it. We aren't fighting for something like gay marriage or medical marijuana. As many have said in the past, just wear them. I still wear heels, I just wear them discretely as to not upset my wife. But as someone else stated here, if you look closely, you will see I am infact wearing atleast women's shoes, if not heels. You can tell from the shape of the boots (it is thicker where it shouldn't be and my foot and toes aren't where they should be, etc) or if you watch my step closely. As a matter of fact, I have seen people outside and at work look at my boots very closely, they know something is odd but can't figure out what. Now I don't offer any reason to act different because to me, I owe them no explaination. No more than why I am wearing a certain pair of pants or jacket. If they don't like my chose in footware, so what? It's not their life to worry about. As I said, the only person's opinion that concerns me is my wife. But even with her I haven't stopped, I just found an alternative. The reason why the alternative works for me is because I don't wear heels for how they look but rather how they feel. So I have no problems wearing discrete heels. But for those fortunate enough to either have an understanding spouse, girlfriend, or still single, wear what you like. As I said, there is no "war" we are fighting here. What exact rights are we pushing to gain that we don't have right now??? I am sure the women in the 50s still had guys that didn't like them wearing jeans. They never sought approval, they just did it. Guys in the 80s didn't seek to gain approval to wear earrings, they just got them. You aren't going to gain approval from the whole of society, just wear them.

[Jarl Ayari]

My partner GG has already answered one of the numerous threads with this same issue, she is a 'real womam' at least I ope she is, **prods her to make sure** Go and find her opinion... At the end of the day though, I do it for me, I enjoy it, I feel good about it, but having her encouragement does give me that little confidence edge that I wouldnt usually have. Andi

[Elegant]

but in reality it's not...unless of course you are an openly gay man."

This amused me. She thinks that these collective delusions and culturally imposed stereotypes are reality? C'mon, there is no spoon!

[Mr. X]

I was definitely not looking for acceptance from her. And her answer will not discourage me from wearing heels anymore. I was mearly looking for an opinion. Her answer was on par with what I thought she would say. When something is not normal it automatically equates to something being wrong in most peoples eyes..

[Rockpup]

This always annoys me as a guy in heels is -not- openly accepted in the gay community unless you are TV/TG, or going out as a drag queen. Most gay guys are into "guys", at least 90% of the gay guys I am friends with are.

[niftygeek]

Here is a real woman's opinion on heels.

I'm a real girl, as real as they get, and my finace wears heels. He looks damn good in them, and he walks in them better than I do.

And I love him just the same, if not more so because of it.

Heels are something you put on your feet. They are not something that changes the person you are inside. If you're an ass without heels, you'll be an ass in heels, to put it blankly. If you're heterosexual without heels, wearing them will most certianly not make you homosexual. I have a high number of gay friends, and an even higher number of gay family members, and her comment about how it's only normal if you're openly gay made me see red. So I could only be 'normal' wearing workboots and jeans if I were openly lesbian?

Men in heels are fine. Most men I know look good in heels! All the men on this site look good in heels! I know we can't hope for free and open acceptance, but come on, it's about time society learned not to snicker and point.

So to answer your question, not only would I date a man in heels, I'll marry one!

[roniheels]

This was one woman's opinon. I have been confronted by women in public when I was wearing feminine high heels and as I have said before the majority of reactions have been positive. Yes, some women have either given me funny looks, shook their heads, and whispered to friends to be peceived as a negative reation. But most of the reations I get from women are positive. And if I'm asked point blank why I am wearing feminie high heels, I tell them why, they appreciate my honesty, some even make comments about the specific high heels I'm wearing, and we go about our business. Some have asked me if I'm gay because I'm wearing high heels. I ask them if they associate men wearing high heels with being gay, and I ask them if they see a woman wearing Wolverine work boots, if they think she is a lesbian? I tell them I am not gay, I am not a cross dresser, I just simply enjoy wearing high heels. I can't control what they think about me and for that matter, I don't care. I enjoy wearing high heels in private and in public.

[Histiletto]

Opinions are a dime a dozen, maybe two bits, or it doesn't matter, but the one that really matters is mine for me or yours for you. If you want to give your personal rights to others, that is your choice. However, I hope it's to someone who you really care for and they truely care for you.

[Mr. X]

Just out of curiosity, how does pro-wrestling involve itself in this situation? Is the girl who was selling the shoes a pro-wrestler?

Yes she is a pro wrestler. Or at least involved in it as she does not actually wrestle.

[Mr. X]

Some have asked me if I'm gay because I'm wearing high heels. I ask them if they associate men wearing high heels with being gay, and I ask them if they see a woman wearing Wolverine work boots, if they think she is a lesbian?

I never thought of that one before. I will have to use that one some time.

[dblair]

"Here is a real woman's opinion on men in heels"...Are you kidding??? I don't even understand the point of this. Are you suggesting that because one "real woman" doesn't like it, that she speaks for all women? Or even a majority of women? Every person is a unique individual and therefore may have their own ideas...and as men who wear heels, we should all understand that concept better than anyone. Who knows, maybe her feelings on the subject do happen to represent the majority of women, or maybe they don't, but we surely can't draw any conclusions based on the comments of one person, even if she is "real". This type of "us-against-them" thinking only makes like more difficult for everyone. If we want to be accepted as individuals, we all need to treat others as such and not classify all women as this, or all men as that, or all people of a certain ethnic group as something else. Does everyone understand what I'm getting at? I hope I don't come off too aggressive, but this is something that is close to my heart.

[Guest]

oh yeah I do get what your saying there,dblair I understand 100% since I've felt this way myself.

[sscotty727]

Again, the more you attach the idea that wearing heels is somehow "taboo" the more power you are giving to the idea that you are doing something "wrong" that needs to be justified. Do you take necklaces you are wearing around and ask women what do they think about you wearing it? Your watch? Your jacket? Sunglasses? Etc? The more you just treat that you are wearing shoes, not women's shoes, but just shoes, the less issue you will have wearing them. Don't ask approval or ask if they like it. You are just opening yourself up. If someone comes up to you and started berating you for wearing them, then I can understand defending it, but to put people on the spot "what do you think of this?" is only opening yourself up to critism. Then when they voice their honest reaction of not liking it, you can't get upset. You have to come to the conclusion that there are people that aren't going to like it. Everyone here has a fashion that to them personally goes too far. Be it people stretching their ears with ever growing rings to peircing the nose, hanging on hooks, etc, there will come some point when you yourself will think something is too strange. You can't honestly get upset over people's negative reaction when being put on the spot. You can get upset if they come up to you and try to restrict your right to wear them however. Until then, just wear whatever you are personally comfortable with wearing, just as you would any other article of clothing you wear. Don't attach some mystical power to heels that aren't there. Just to give you an idea, here are two shoes I have worn to work when I was working on the road, before I started coming home everynight. The black pair, when I wore them to work (and I worked as a contractor for the government), I even had a few guys come out and see them as I walked in and snickered as I walked past them. I paid them no attention and just walked to my cube and went about my business. During the day I noticed my pant leg raised and they were visable. Not one person I worked with said one word, nor did they start to treat me differently (when I stared there I was wearing flat shoes). If I acted as if they were something odd, I would have failed. By me just wearing them and acting no different that I had before, they might have thought it odd for a short period of time, but then just ignored it and moved on. I had given them no extra power than they were just a pair of shoes on my feet that I was wearing.

[Mr. X]

Looks like I opened up the proverbial can of worms with this one....lol. I was mearly relaying info acquired. Take it for what you will or don't take it at all.

[Histiletto]

Mr. X, We all have strong feelings about something and though the intended subject wasn't initially directed at the eventual replies, buttons may be pushed to ignite an intense response. Your topic began the conditions to post. Thanks for opening this venue to help some express and share their feelings that may give all of us a better understanding of life.

[HeelD]

LOL - I think some people here were expecting the woman to be very positive about men in heels!

[Maximilian]

I'll tell you what the 5 real young women/girls at the MAC store said about my style in heels this evening while 'testing' various eye shadows on me...."hot"

[William]

Now, I'm really confused... a "real woman" thinks men in heels must be gay? Wow, dudes, never considered that scenario!! C'mon! Ignorant people are going to have ignorant ideas. Get over it. Wear what you want to wear. What's the point of worrying who likes your choices and who doesn't?! "What if my friends think I'm gay?" Who cares? Admittedly, I'm more of a heel fetish guy than a public heel wearing kinda guy. So, even though I've worn heels in public for fun, I'm not at all interested in wearing heels 24/7, nor am I looking to join a campaign change society's thoughts on fashion. (I wear my fair share of out-of-the-ordinary clothing and accessories. I think I understand taking risks, too.) So, my advise: grow up and wear what you want to wear -- and stop whining about the acceptance of others! Work on acceptance of yourself. Wil

[Thighboots2]

William, Nicely put.

[HappyinHeels]

Mr. X, After reading the origin of the thread about looking for a real woman's opinion on men wearing heels I realized that is another perpetuation of the double standard since the "real women" never asked the "real men" what we thought when they started wearing men's cowboy boots or men's polo shirts or etcetera. They just went ahead and DID it and VOILA...a new fashion idea is born. The validation or acceptance or tolerance that most of us seek, but have trouble finding the exact word in English, comes when our confidence allows to express ourselves without any mental hindrances. Maybe, in this case I'll go north to Quebec and use a word from my father's tongue and say what we seek is "la joie de vivre" the so-called "joy of living". La joie de vivre lives right next to "laissez les boons temps rouler" or let the good times roll. It's about living and enjoying life to its fullest because we all have an expiration date. Wearing high heels is something so important that it gave rise to this entire forum, for women and MEN alike, it's just who we are. It's a part of our joie de vivre. HappyinHeels Talone(e) et Contente(e)

[Brandy]

Having just read this thread reminds me the same arguements, concerns, feelings are common among other shall we say male "fashion forward", freestylers.

For the men;

Similar conversations can be found on skirtcafe.org, for men wearing skirts, on http://forums.delphiforums.com/LegwearUF/ for men wearing tightd/pantyhose, I'm sure if I did a little more searching, more forums would popup.

For equal time for the ladies;

http://fashionmylegs.blogspot.com/ for women who prefer to wear pantyhose/tights and who prefer skirts/dress instead of trousers.

I once got into a discussion with a lady at work about her wearing skirts, she like my Utilikilt/akirt. She did not wear skirts because people were so use to seeing her in jeans/pants that they would comment about her wearing skirts and she was uncomfortable about getting comments.

-- Brandy

[hhboots]

Title of the thread should read:

Here is a real ignorant woman's opinion on men in heels.

Mind you, I am not fooling myself into thinking that most women would like to see men in heels, I am sure most would not in fact... however, her comments were completely ignorant.