What do women really think about men in high heels?

[Robby]

I am curious what women really think of a man in heels. After all raised heels appeared in the 1500s for men. They were developed when the leather saddle stirrup was being replaced with wooden stirrup. The soft soled shoes with no heel would slid forward in the stirrup causing the rider’s foot to slip through the stirrup, causing him to fall off the horse with his foot caught in the stirrup while being drug to death. So the thicker soul was fashioned to distribute a man’s weight with a heel to stop his foot from slipping through the stirrup. Still the short heel would still sometimes slip forward in the stirrup causing the same problem, so heels continued to gain in height. Then in the 1600s men began wearing fashionable shoes with heels between 3 and 4 inches in height. The phrase “Well Heeled” came from this era. The first sign of women’s heels appeared around 1533 when Queen Catherine de”Medici commissioned a cobbler to fashion a pair of heels, both for fashion and to make her taller. Now days, the only heals made for men come on Cowboy Boots. The Cowboy was some what vain, believe it or not. In the mid to late 1800s men with smaller feet were considered sexier. So the underslung heel was made. It ranged from 2 inches to over 3 inches in height. It had all the characteristic of a riding heel but with a more underslung slop. A riding heel was about 2 inches in height to prevent the foot from slipping through a metal stirrup and sloped on the back side to prevent catching brush or tree limbs while backing a horse. The underslung heel made a man’s foot print appear one shoe size smaller then it actually was. As time passed the underslung shortened to about 2 to 2 ½ inches in the early 1900s. All the main Cowboy actors wore them. But as time has passed and stirrups were replaced with gas peddles, the heels all but disappeared except on custom boots. I love the underslungs because they in some magical way extend my legs, make me taller and create an elevated sense of well being. Being an avid hiker, I sustain a foot injury which turned into Plantar Fasciitis. My Doctor recommended I stay in my boots with a tall heel because it would help my Plantar Fasciitis and high arches. So today most of my boots have underslung heels and I don’t have Plantar Fasciitis, wish hiking boots had a little more heel. Do women really like to see men in heels, say 2 ½ inches to 3 inches or is it just an oddity like seeing a man in a Kilt? I read an article that said women love to see a man in a kilt but don’t want their men wearing one. So what is your opinion?

[Thighboots2]

Snip....

Do women really like to see men in heels, say 2 ½ inches to 3 inches or is it just an oddity like seeing a man in a Kilt? I read an article that said women love to see a man in a kilt but don’t want their men wearing one. So what is your opinion?

Hi Robby,

This has been asked many times before on here, but no harm in asking again although you will get answers from the guys mostly.

My perspective is that the bulk answer is NO, but Kneehighs has said and I agree that there is a world of difference between the thought of a man wearing heels and then seeing a man in heels. Heels is such a broad term that in your mind you instantly think of high stiletto heels, whereas a 3" cuban heel is realy quite masculine. I wear that height heel all the time. I wore the shoes in my avatar at a black tie dinner/dance last saturday without a care. My wife doesn't mind the heel because it is a mans shoe made for a man and so on so it is quite acceptable. Her godmother commented on my heels, but that was all the feedback I got. BTW, its a great height for ballroom dancing.

Therefore there is no answer to yoru question because you really have to define the shoe to see if it is acceptable with the outfit being worn.

As to kilts and why I picked it up as a quote, I agree with the article. My wife being a typical girlie girl loved to see her cousin's partner in his kilt, yet when I have expressed the wish to wear said outfit, she thinks I am into crossdressing (I am but not that she knows this little fact) because I am not Scottish and so not allowed to wear a kilt. She thinks it will lead to wanting to wear a normal womens skirt. Don't you just love women as they are so full of contradictions. I have two Kikoys which are west african male tribal garments (google Kikoy). Basically its a wraparound skirt. Only suitable for when it is really hot and I had them for the Maldives. I wore them the whole holiday (2 weeks) and was a comfortable as could be (probably the most comfortable male holidaymaker at the hotel). Kicker was she bought me the Kikoys, so she was OK with me wearing a skirt type garment there, or around the home in the summer and at the beach. I don't get it, but then I am just a bloke.

Simon.

[Steve63130]

Simon, Please stop looking for logic here. It's a waste of your time. LOL Steve

[johnieheel]

All women, like all men, have different opinions. SIMPLE... Just as steve said.

[Robby]

Hi Thighboots2, Can I ask where you got your shoes. I would like to order a pair. Also I am Scottish so I do wear Kilts to specific events, but you don't have to be Scottish to wear a kilt. To me it is a fashion statement. Also many years ago the British government outlawed the wearing of a kilt. Wearing one now is legal but it still is associated to rebellious natures. Get one and let you wife see you in it.

[Guest]

All women, like all men, have different opinions. SIMPLE...

Just as steve said.

But just as variable

Al

[Thighboots2]

Simon,

Please stop looking for logic here. It's a waste of your time. LOL

Steve

Steve,

I gave up looking for logic when it comes to women's thinking years ago. By using the inconsistencies that I face, I was trying to illustrate that this question is one that has no answer.

Robbie,

Those are from Archie Eyebrows however, it appears they may no longer be available. Designed and made by Terry de Havilland they were sold at Tom Bakers shop in Soho, but they are no longer available form them. I have tried to phone the studio several times now with no answer, but I keep on trying. Also the price on the website is far more than I paid at the studio. There were plans for a complimentary range for the girls, but that hasn't come to anything.

Simon.

[AZShoeNut]

Howdy, I have to agree with most of the perspectives shared. I will however say that when it is "safe" or "okay", such as Halloween, most girls really dig it that there is a guy there wearing high heels. I have worn mine twice on Halloween and almost every gal I came across loved my shoes, loved inquiring what it was like to learn how to walk in them, and quite honestly some even seem to be turned on by it. Now again this is tempered by it being Halloween however I think that it does betray some level of interest that many gals have at some level in guys wearing heels. If it were made "okay" then I think that many gals would dig having a guy around that shares their interest. Larry

[Steve63130]

If it were made "okay" then I think that many gals would dig having a guy around that shares their interest.

Larry

Your last sentence intrigues me. How does it get "made" ok? Are you sure it isn't "ok" now? How do you measure "ok" anyway?

Things get "ok" because they get commonplace. Back 20 years ago, when a guy wore earrings (or a single earring back then) it was uncommon and when you saw him, you stared and tried to make sense of it. Maybe you laughed. Sightings were few and far between, so next time, you did it again. But after a few sightings, the novelty wore off and, although you continued to notice, you no longer stared or paid much attention to it. Who even bothers to notice anymore? It's very common. Why? Because enough guys do it so the public is exposed frequently and it's no big deal.

We here are pioneers. We're in the very early stages of this effort and we are trying to start a trend. It isn't common to see a guy in heels yet, especially feminine or dressy heels (stiletto) and if you venture out, you can expect to get noticed, stared at, and laughed at. It's normal at this early stage. If enough of us do it often enough, it eventually becomes commonplace and people stop noticing. But if we don't do it, no one else is going to declare suddenly that it's "ok." It isn't automatic and it will not happen spontaneously. We have to "earn" the approval by doing it often enough and being seen by the public.

I could also have used the example of women adopting pants as part of their wardrobe. It wasn't acceptable at first either, but the more they did it, the more commonplace it became and the more "ok" it was (well, except for those of us who like to see legs!).

Steve

[AZShoeNut]

Your last sentence intrigues me. How does it get "made" ok? Are you sure it isn't "ok" now? How do you measure "ok" anyway?

Howdy,

I think I was intending that part of the reply to be hypothetical. It still will raise eyebrows if a guy is seen wearing heels and you hardly ever see it. I think if that were absent nearly completely then the later portion of that statement would be correct. And also I think that as this is coming to be there are gals that do enjoy the benefit of having a guy in their life that participate in their passion for shoes.

Larry

[kneehighs]

My opinion of what women think of men in heels is easy to put now. In short, it depends more on my opinion of myself than it does on them.

It begins with the healthy realization that men in heels will probably never be commonplace with the pop culture public or mainstream consumer public. Not that it matters because it's not going to stop me from wearing my heels.

But what it does help me come to terms with, is that my acceptance with women will be won on a case-by-case basis, one person at a time.

Last night I partied with a girl who grew up in an extremely wealthy family (her parents took a company public). She took pride in the fact the global travels and education her upbringing had afforded her enabled her to see everything there was to be seen in the world, until she realized she had never seen a man in heels. Surprise, surprise!

So there I was in skinny high waisted black pants (H&M), a black satin Calvin Klein blazer layered over a LBD (H&M), and 4.5" round toe Nine West pumps answering her usual questions, "are you gay?" "I would think women would find that a turn off"....personally I think if women would realize there other more exclusive ways to express their womanhood besides a pair of heels, we'd all have it easier. It takes a woman secure in the richly diverse ways of expressing her womanhood and femininity to accept a guy in heels--that's just my opinion.

She's a definite convert now, but it's because my frame of self acceptance was stronger than her frame of doubt.

It works every time.

[roniheels]

I've answered similar posts to this question before and I still believe that it seems younger women have a harder time accepting men in high heels because now this is their culture. Women closer to my age accept it more. Thiss is just based on my own personal experiences, but even I've had the opposite apply in both instances. It just depends on the individual woman and her feelings and opinions.

[yozz]

It works every time.

Your luck is that you don't sample a representative crosssection of the female

population. When you go clubbing in NY, the women there are prepared for

strange things. Also when one walks around either New Amsterdam or Old

Amsterdam, one expects things that are different. At such a moment you are

an object of interest.

Things will be different when one considers ordinary family life somewhere

far away from big cities, where people are very conservative and the most

important considerations of your wife are what her friends or family will think

about you or her and proper logic has been left behind many miles ago.

Of course you are completely right that to do what you do needs confidence.

Lots of it. And that the women you meet will appreciate it.

Y.

[kneehighs]

^ Look, you have to focus on what you can control. We can always control our attitudes towards ourselves, which was my point.

The questions we ask ourselves have the ability to guide us into, or out of, more problems in life. I think it was Stan Lech that was a Nazi camp prisoner. He kept asking himself the question, "how can I escape?" until finally one day a dump truck with dead bodies in the back, the corpses of all the people whose fillings, rings, gold, and silver had been removed stopped right in front of him. Lech dove naked into the dump truck and allowed himself to be dumped into the ground holes where they laid the decomposing dead bodies to waste. Once the truck pulled away, Lech was a free man and walked without clothes miles to the border and freedom. All because he asked himself the right question.

The question we should be asking ourselves is NOT, "what do women really think of men in high heels?" and all the socially awkward moments that might occur around her friends, family, and colleagues.

The question we should be asking ourselves is, "What can I do to wear my heels with sexy self confidence?" (or some version thereof).

[crotchboots-m]

lets face it,most to them hate it. why? ask them...

[Bubba136]

Kneehighs is correct. Act with bold confidence and you can pull it off. However, women have such an instinctively strong attraction to "manly men," most naturally view effeminate appearing males as "not the most desirable" catches in the chase for species propagation. It's only when the male has an opportunity to discuss his unorthodox clothing choices with a women that their attitude is adjusted....And then its usually just her attitude towards that specific individual, not the entire species.

[kneehighs]

...... However, women have such an instinctively strong attraction to "manly men," most naturally view effeminate appearing males as "not the most desirable" catches in the chase for species propagation.

It's only when the male has an opportunity to discuss his unorthodox clothing choices with a women that their attitude is adjusted....And then its usually just her attitude towards that specific individual, not the entire species.

OMG.

Right.

On.

Point.

[kikepa]

We here are pioneers. We're in the very early stages of this effort and we are trying to start a trend. It isn't common to see a guy in heels yet, especially feminine or dressy heels (stiletto) and if you venture out, you can expect to get noticed, stared at, and laughed at. It's normal at this early stage.

We're not actually in the "very early stages" of this effort, as it's been going on since the 60s.

Rather, the trends simply haven't reached critical mass where it takes off as a more widely acceptable fashion trend.

If the first guys who wore earrings had worn ridiculous-looking earrings (for a guy), male earring wearing probably wouldn't have taken off, either. Because most kept it conservative, and tasteful, it did take off, and now it's commonplace.

You want male heeling to take off? Keep it conservative, and tasteful. But if you want it to screech to a halt, wear color and style combos that look ridiculous on guys (and most girls).

[Steve63130]

But I would argue that "ridiculous" is in the eye of the beholder. Who defines it? What's ridiculous to one person may not be to another. Some people might find any woman's high heels ridiculous on a man. Others may find just stilettos ridiculous. Or platforms. And it depends on the build of the person wearing the shoes, too. There are so many variables. Steve

[Bubba136]

But I would argue that "ridiculous" is in the eye of the beholder. Who defines it? What's ridiculous to one person may not be to another. Some people might find any woman's high heels ridiculous on a man. Others may find just stilettos ridiculous. Or platforms. And it depends on the build of the person wearing the shoes, too. There are so many variables.

Steve

Nothing is really easy or uncomplicated. Even changing the oil in your car can be frustrating.

[Dawn HH]

Men wearing heels in public may also be frustrating at times, but well worth fighting for to gain acceptance for the future of those men who wish to wear heels whenever and whereever they want. Nothing tried, nothing gained. Cheers--- Dawn HH

[JeffB]

Nothing is really easy or uncomplicated. Even changing the oil in your car can be frustrating.

I wouldn't know. I let Jiffy Lube take care of that! HA!

But seriously, opinions of what women think about men wearing heels can vary wildly, some find it acceptable, some don't, some can be openminded about the practice, others have their minds set in concrete and won't change. Personally, I don't worry about such insignificant things because I can't control the hearts and minds of the public when they see me in heels, nor would I want to.

[Thighboots2]

You want male heeling to take off? Keep it conservative, and tasteful. But if you want it to screech to a halt, wear color and style combos that look ridiculous on guys (and most girls).

Wise words Kikepa, but it falls on deaf ears.

Simon.

[Thighmax]

I for one have talked to a few about my boot wearing and they have been very understanding. I don't know if that says something. I do believe that you have to be your own person and enjoy what you wear without having to explain to anybody.