Men using high heels = gay

[HHfanatic]

Can anyone at the forum convince my philippine wife that men that like heels and like to wear heels, are not gay? Over here life is only "black & white". If a man like to wear anything that is worn normally by women...he is automaticly gay.

[Tech]

Hi HHFanatic Maybe the best thing to do is to let your wife join in here and spend some time reading what all of us talk about, who we are and generally get to know us all, and she will then see that just because a man wears something on his feet, it doesnt have any bearing on his sexuality. First hand experience might be better than trying to explain. Thats like the old myth that cross-dressers must be gay, when in fact they just enjoy wearing femine clothes..

[HHfanatic]

My wife read through your replay and will join the forum..:-)

[hoverfly]

You mean a guy wearing heels is gay!?! Never heard of such thing.........

[shrimper]

Can anyone at the forum convince my philippine wife that men that like heels and like to wear heels, are not gay?

Over here life is only "black & white".

If a man like to wear anything that is worn normally by women...he is automaticly gay.

Only you can do that my friend. I'm too busy trying to convince my own wife.

[shyguy]

Here's one thread to start with...

http://www.hhplace.org/discuss/guys/10666-sexual_orientation.html

[Stilettoscot]

The thing I don't get is this: Women in the clubs I go to seem surprised I am not gay when I wear my shoes. I am very masculine, and openly (like any guy) attracted to women and femininity. Taking aside many of the TV's at these clubs (who are usually either putting on a show, or gender bent), gay men I know (lots) are not attracted to other men who appear and dress feminine. Therefore, very, very few gay men are attracted to femininity and heels. While I, being straight, am EXCEEDINGLY attracted to heels, and also really enjoy wearing them! So, from my knowledge, very few gay men wear heels.

[crotchboots-m]

it seems humans like to categorize everything...put them i nice tidy boxes that everyone can relate to and understand. this is far easier than taking off the top of the box and really figuring out what is going on,of course. and the great majority dont want spend any time thinking about men in heels. so they spit out the most likely scenario(in their mind and experience) and move off to more interesting and pressing matter. and this is especially true of unpleasant and deviant topics.

[Dr. Shoe]

Actually some gay guys wear heels and some straight guys do too. Since when has fashion dictated sexuality and vice versa though.? Does that mean that all women in men's clothes are lesbian?

[johnieheel]

I have recently discovered that my step daughter, who is a boy scout troop leader btw, and her 2 boys, 8 and 13 and neanderthal husband, caught us out in heels last weekend. She too has not done her home work. She called me to ask about a supplement for her son's joints and left a voice mail. I called back and the 8yr old answered and started yelling at me asking why was I wearing those fagot high heel shoes. This in turn has started a very uncomfortable conflict between us. As this little boy was going off on me, I heard his dad in the back ground supporting him. I told him to let me talk to his mother and by my surprise, she agreed with them both and said men do not wear high heels in public, ONLY GAYS DO THAT. I told her I will not tolerate being called a fagot and asked why she is a "boy scout troop leader" Only men do that. Now I wander what would happen if the boy scouts of America new she was teaching her children words like fagot etc.? She told me I should stay in the closet and only wear high heels in private. I did not raise my children like this and she needs to take a course in people skills. I'm sure it has a lot to do with the father. They are being raised to know that real men drink, smoke, curse, run over little animals in the road and laugh and the macho list goes on. I suppose time will take care of this one also. Moral of this venting is that I'm still me and if you don't like me as I am and I have to dress the way YOU want me to, OH WELL, your loss.

[Histiletto]

I have recently discovered that my step daughter, who is a boy scout troop leader btw, and her 2 boys, 8 and 13 and neanderthal husband, caught us out in heels last weekend.

She too has not done her home work. She called me to ask about a supplement for her son's joints and left a voice mail.

I called back and the 8yr old answered and started yelling at me asking why was I wearing those fagot high heel shoes. This in turn has started a very uncomfortable conflict between us. As this little boy was going off on me, I heard his dad in the back ground supporting him.

I told him to let me talk to his mother and by my surprise, she agreed with them both and said men do not wear high heels in public, ONLY GAYS DO THAT. I told her I will not tolerate being called a fagot and asked why she is a "boy scout troop leader" Only men do that.

Now I wander what would happen if the boy scouts of America new she was teaching her children words like fagot etc.?

She told me I should stay in the closet and only wear high heels in private.

I did not raise my children like this and she needs to take a course in people skills. I'm sure it has a lot to do with the father. They are being raised to know that real men drink, smoke, curse, run over little animals in the road and laugh and the macho list goes on.

I suppose time will take care of this one also.

Moral of this venting is that I'm still me and if you don't like me as I am and I have to dress the way YOU want me to, OH WELL, your loss.

Hey johnieheel,

The Boy Scout organization has been a good thing for young boys to learn about things they normally wouldn't consider on their own. Maybe someday they could have a merit badge for fashion coordination, which includes which heels to wear with their uniform.

However, with all jesting aside, I have also found many of their members, adults and children, are so close-minded in even tolerating anything that they figure doesn't fit the stereotypical norm. What really hurts is the fact that they are teaching hatred for anyone that doesn't walk in their foot-steps. We have heard the news stories of a few Moslem fanatics that can't tolerate infidels (the ones who don't follow the teachings of Mohammed). Seems many of the scouting members are teaching the very same kind of prejudicial/hate doctrine. I don't know if the national leaders of scouting condone these activities, but something needs to be presented to focus a corrective action. The young minds like your step-daughter's children deserved a better outlook on life. These brainless teachings have caused many senseless crimes and I personally fear the people who don't love their neighbor for who they are. Embracing truths will forever be a better way to live than spilling the ignorance of lies and hate.

[johnieheel]

I agree 100% Histiletto. Thank you for your words of encouragement.

[crotchboots-m]

this is perfect example of what ive said in the past about wearing heels in public...there is a cost. but the side benefit is that it smokes out those closet fascists that you dont know about. once you know who they are,you can deal with them.

[Guest]

well, johnieheel, it seems that your stepdaughter, was trying to "get @ you" by making up a phony reason for you to call her back, then have her son answer with her idiot husband in the background, trying to "direct" this bashing to his son, who no dought is greatly influenced BY the father in question.- because you do see that she would KNOW that you would call her back to respond to the phony story about her son's so-called problem with his joints (I'm only assuming this is the reason, maybe he DOES have joint problems, I dont know myself only what you have said about it.)

[johnieheel]

well, johnieheel, it seems that your stepdaughter, was trying to "get @ you" by making up a phony reason for you to call her back, then have her son answer with her idiot husband in the background, trying to "direct" this bashing to his son, who no dought is greatly influenced BY the father in question.- because you do see that she would KNOW that you would call her back to respond to the phony story about her son's so-called problem with his joints (I'm only assuming this is the reason, maybe he DOES have joint problems, I dont know myself only what you have said about it.)

He plays football and sometimes has sore joints and I'm sort of the family and local friend advisor do to my education and experience in the muscle skelton and supplementing. This is not the boy who answered the phone. This is the 13 yr old who is smarter than that and likes grand pa for what he is and not what he wears.

As for a small few in the family who feed on others pain and suffering and do there best to add fuel to what they think is a fire, the rest aint so bad.

I'm sure the little one seen it was me calling and couldn't wait to let me know that only fagots wear high heels. LOL! Sorry, not going to let a 7 yr old ruin my day. In time he will learn, probably the hard way. He has a very loud mouth and likes to say things to hurt people and thinks , like his mother and father, that he has all the answers to everything. I don't blame him, yet.

[Stilettoscot]

... my step daughter, ....

.....I heard his dad in the back ground supporting him.....

Johnie,

Is the guy who supported the kid your son???

Either way, narrow minded people are just bumps in the road.

Sorry you had to hear crap like that.

[johnieheel]

Son in law. He's a jerk. Only weighs about 60 lbs wet fully clothed with a straggly beard, long uncombed hair and a cigarette sticking out of his mouth. His idea of a real man is a guy who smokes, curses, pokes fun at others no matter what the out come may be and chases animals around the woods with a gun. Gotta admit, he is quite a good hunter and has taught his kids well in that area. No big deal and we really need to get off this soap box and back to the org. thread. Thanks guys. It's just that i seen the (only gays wear heels and had to throw this in.) Just to add one more little detail, my daughter, as I said has not done her home work on this or any other subject of this nature and is blind to it all but still has all the answers. NOT!

[Maximilian]

It's sad that kids are brainwashed at such a young age by close minded adults, causing them to become close minded as well. Needless to say, the kid doesn't even know what he's saying, only that calling someone a "faggot" is a hurtful/insulting word which seems to please the kid, maybe because it's a bonding moment between him and his redneck dad. I'm surrounded by close minded rednecks at work. If they saw me in feminine fashion mode I'm pretty sure their attitudes would change towards me for the worse or at the very least, would constantly crack jokes about it. That doesn't mean that I'd stop wearing heels in public. If one of my co-workers sees me in public I'll deal with it then and there. I just don't make it known to everyone about it. Then again, why would I talk about my fashion styles to other guys? Not exactly a topic for the average guys anyway.

[WA10rHeelGuy]

Men+Heels=Gay = Aarrgghh!! Okay so I'm used to that as one of the first questions from friendly peeps and once they know you are straight then the normal heel admiring continues. My first few nights in public were in gay bars as I thought they would be safer. They were. Most of the gay guys kept their distance seeing a guy in heels and the lesbians had no few problems chatting. There are still far too many that think Men+Heels=Gay Drag Queen and I met a couple dozen of them last night outside my local safe pub. I walked on by as wasn't going to take the banter into the pub. Many gay references and some shouting that I should get my skirt and wig on. Very frustrating when I just wanted a quiet night out in heels. Okay so I did go in by the side door after a detour.

[JeffB]

The world sadly is chock full of knuckle-draggers, troglodytes and cavemen, even worse when some of these narrow minded neanderthals turn out to be people we know, including family members. God only knows where such foolish opinions regarding footwear and sexual orientation were formed, unfortunately, these cementheads with their ridiculously inaccurate opinions would rather die than admit being wrong, and, as an ugly side effect, their misinformation is passed down to future generations, thus perpetuating both prejudice and ignorance.

[Bubba136]

Hmmm! Johnnieheels' situation makes for interesting family gatherings. However, lets not get too narrow minded ourselves. Just because someone has the opinion that men shouldn't wear high heels, or any other item of female dress, isn't a reason to verbally "take them apart" and pronounce them as "anti-abhorrent behavior" creeps from times long gone past. After all, most of today's society are still engaged in boy-girl divisions in dress and behavior and finds (views, thinks) men in womens attire is strange. The only "grace saving" thing is that a large number people, while not out-rightly critical of this behavior, are intelligent enough to show a passive face, not make derogatory remarks and go on their way, without giving any outward sign of how they might really feel. Kinda like projecting the "Live and Let Live" philosophy. (By the way, Johnnieheels, didn't you post a while back that one of your Step Daughters came to your house with her children and that one of the boys wanted to take a couple pair of your heels home to try them? This didn't happen to be one of that group, did it?)

[aussieheels1]

Johnnieheels - that must be a difficult situation but then i suppose you (like most of us) probably expected that type of reaction and thus have kept (or tried to keep) the heels wearing in the closet with friends and family..... Back to the original OP question of Men in Heels = Gay.... well... i guess to be brutally honest.... if i see someone a man wearing heels in the street, my first assumption is that the are more likely to be gay then not... and this is me who is completely hetero and love wearing heels..... am i a hyprocrit.... probably, but it s my first reaction.... i've posted before about the guilt i feel about my first reaction when i see a TV or a guy wearing something a bit odd.... but then am i just jealous that i'm not as confident to do what they are doing.... and have their attitude of "not giving a sh$t" about what other thinks...... who knows....

[johnieheel]

Hmmm! Johnnieheels' situation makes for interesting family gatherings. However, lets not get too narrow minded ourselves. Just because someone has the opinion that men shouldn't wear high heels, or any other item of female dress, isn't a reason to verbally "take them apart" and pronounce them as "anti-abhorrent behavior" creeps from times long gone past. After all, most of today's society are still engaged in boy-girl divisions in dress and behavior and finds (views, thinks) men in womens attire is strange.

The only "grace saving" thing is that a large number people, while not out-rightly critical of this behavior, are intelligent enough to show a passive face, not make derogatory remarks and go on their way, without giving any outward sign of how they might really might feel. Kinda like projecting the "Live and Let Live" philosophy.

(By the way, Johnnieheels, didn't you post a while back that one of your Step Daughters came to your house with her children and that one of the boys wanted to take a couple pair of your heels home to try them? This didn't happen to be one of that group, did it?)

That was my wifes grandson.

[Stilettoscot]

Johnie, It seems we are having a tough time keeping up with the family tree...LOL

[raymond.nl]

Married, two children, wife actively supports my wearing heels (and even bought me a pair of 3"/7cm heel boots two weeks ago!)

[johnieheel]

Johnie,

It seems we are having a tough time keeping up with the family tree...LOL

Up date on family tree.

One step daughter w/2 boys. 13 and 7

One daughter 26 that works day shift where i do and has no problem with it.

Wife has one daughter w/9yr old who likes my heels and trys them on when he comes over. For the most part, wifes whole family is ok with it and most of the women like me in my red mj's.

Hope that clears it all up. lol

[Bubba136]

Up date on family tree.

One step daughter w/2 boys. 13 and 7

One daughter 26 that works day shift where i do and has no problem with it.

Wife has one daughter w/9yr old who likes my heels and trys them on when he comes over. For the most part, wifes whole family is ok with it and most of the women like me in my red mj's.

Hope that clears it all up. lol

From the above, I would take it that your one (1) step daughter with the two boys is not your "present" wife's child? And, the two boys, ages 13 and 7 are the boys that are giving you grief and aren't really your "blood" relatives (or, as you say, the younger one is giving you the grief with the encouragement of his father)?

(By the way, the one encouragement that I forgot to state in my earlier posting is that should the "father" ever give you grief to your face, I would, if I were you, "dope-slap" the holy shit out of him -- after which (while he was picking himself up off of the ground) I would tell him never to open his mouth about you again.))

[shyguy]

(By the way, the one encouragement that I forgot to state in my earlier posting is that should the "father" ever give you grief to your face, I would, if I were you, "dope-slap" the holy shit out of him -- after which (while he was picking himself up off of the ground) I would tell him never to open his mouth about you again.))

Yeah that'll show the backward thinking neanderthals how a modern man should behave .

[fastfreddy2]

Up date on family tree.

One step daughter w/2 boys. 13 and 7

One daughter 26 that works day shift where i do and has no problem with it.

Wife has one daughter w/9yr old who likes my heels and trys them on when he comes over. For the most part, wifes whole family is ok with it and most of the women like me in my red mj's.

Hope that clears it all up. lol

I think on balance you have it good.

Seems like the father is 'feeding' the children, which in itself is a cowardly act.

I've some questions I'd like to put to a "boy scout troop leader", that happened to be a mother with teenage children. Despite well meant misinformation to the contrary, it seems the Scout movement was started by Baden Powell as a enabler to successful soldier recruitment*.

Back on-topic, I can't even imagine someone running a scout troup being sympathetic to men wearing heels.

I expect the older people in the family might be considered a lost cause. Maybe in 10-15 years, the younger child might be able to make up his own mind. Maybe. Thankfully the elder brother 'understands'. Bless him.

....

* The History Channel tells me it was started when 40% of the potential working class recruits were refused entry to the British Army to fight and possibly die for their country abroad, because they weren't healthy enough to enlist.

[bootsforme]

My response is ... "don't even let yourself be bothered with what they say." If you respond with any kind of anger, you just give them what they want. In this case, the subject is footware, but if it was pottery or sewing ...would the response be any different? Probably not. Life is too short to let other people get you down. Just tell them that you are going to be who you are, and that a mature person would let it go. And that's that.