blacksmith25 Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 hey everyone im new here and ive loved high heels since i was 3 years old. I have about 30 pairs now and i wanted to know is it weird that a big brolic black cuban guy like me wearing high heels in public? i mean im not tryin to be racist or anything its just i would like to know from another's perspective, so can you guys let me know what you think?
tightsnheels Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 As you said not to be racist but in my experiance it seems that black men can wear much more than us white guys and get away with it. Just my opinion though. T&H "Look for the woman in the dress, if there is no dress there is no woman."-Coco Channel
blacksmith25 Posted June 5, 2008 Author Posted June 5, 2008 well thanks for your opinion at least your being honest about it. i mean considering that the black people i know consider that is to being gay i try to explain that it is only footwear but everyone i have asked says that it is weird and gay. i guess its just because i am around jugdemental people but it is good to get an opinion from an open-minded person
Dr. Shoe Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 It's no more weird than anyone else doing it... Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
vector Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 It's no more weird than anyone else doing it... Some cultures can appear more "homophobic" than others. And to many, a man wearing women's clothing (other than earrings- funny how that has changed in 20 years) is considered homosexual. I am black (African-American) and I believe the African-American, Caribbean, Hispanic and African communities are much less tolerant the the Caucasian communities. JMHO
hiheellover23 Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 well thanks for your opinion at least your being honest about it. i mean considering that the black people i know consider that is to being gay i try to explain that it is only footwear but everyone i have asked says that it is weird and gay. i guess its just because i am around jugdemental people but it is good to get an opinion from an open-minded person Hey what's up blacksmith25, my name is Ramon I'm 28 years of age. I also am an african american male and I have always had those same questions myself. I agree with you that people of the same ethnic background can be our worst enemy because they are afraid of change. Me honestly I am sick of normal and I like to see more variety and besides normal male shoes are boring. Sometimes I have the fear that people will think that I'm gay or something like that but I think I'm more afraid that I may see someone that I recognize and what their outlook would be on me. But for one benefit is that my girlfriend bought me a pair of boots and I will be sure to wear them with pride. As I continue to gradually wear them out to wherever I'm going I start to become more and more comfortable and confident. On the positive tip I figure that in the future we may become the next hottest trend. I mean if the long hairstyles, earrings, manicures, are part of male fashion then I'm pretty sure that we will gradually make it on the list. So keep on doin what ya doin cuz I know I'm gonna keep clickin my high heels.... HHL23 What ya see is what ya get no more or less!!
JeffB Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 As you said not to be racist but in my experiance it seems that black men can wear much more than us white guys and get away with it. Just my opinion though. T&H Really? I don't think that particular memo reached my neighborhood yet. blacksmith25: My name is Jeff, I'm a 49 year old black man, and perhaps the elder statesman when it comes to men of color on this board who wear heels in public. To answer your question, no, you're not weird at all, like the rest of us, you simply have an eclectic fashion sense, nothing more. Only narrowminded or closeminded idiots with IQ's no higher than their ages would associate footwear with sexual preference which is absolute ridiculous. Shoes have nothing at all to do with being gay or not, that's just so much crap. Don't let the uninformed nonsense of fools deter you from wear heels if that's what you want to do. Don't let others, or yourself think that something's wrong with you because you enjoy wearing women's shoes. That's not the case, plain and simple. Just be bold, be confident and do what you enjoy, just like the rest of us here. Welcome aboard! I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
Trinity Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 Peoples perceptions are radically different depending where you live, some areas are very cosmopolitan, and as such people on the whole just dont care/worry about what you wear. other areas are less tolerant. However what you wear is down to you and your own confidence, if you are happy to go out in heels then sod what others think do what you want.
gwl1 Posted June 5, 2008 Posted June 5, 2008 First of all, welcome to this forum, Blacksmith; glad to have you aboard. It always amazes me that people think their own family, neighborhood, ethnic group, tribe, or clan is the most intolerant of all when it comes to accepting fashion that's different. "I live in a small town (or big city) that's too redneck (or too conservative). I could never wear heels around here." We hear that all the time. Well, guess what? It ain't so. The grass is brown on BOTH sides of the fence! So ignore those demons in your head and wear what you want to. The folks around you are no different than those anywhere else. It's a mixed bag - some will notice and others won't; some will be intolerant and others accepting; some will say something (mostly immature teenage girls who giggle a lot when they're in groups), and others (most people, actually) won't. So, as Shakespeare said, "Be true to thyself" and wear whatever pleases YOU. I frequently visit another forum, Legwear as Unisex Fashion, which advocates that tights, pantyhose, and stockings are ok for men to wear also. They agonize over many of the same issues we do here. It's amazing how similar the posts are in many respects. There's no doubt that men are more insecure than women when it comes to apparel. Take a look, if you're interested, at: http://forums.delphiforums.com/legwearuf Another source of interest is Comfilon's web site at www.comfilon.com -they sell nylon hosiery and loungewear for men. Under the tab Customer Support there are FAQs and then OAQs (Occasionally Asked Questions). Scroll down to the OAQ called "Will people think I'm gay?" and read it. It's the best answer I've ever seen to this issue of why people think men who wear items of women's clothing are gay, and you could easily substitute heels for legwear. I especially like the "conversation" at the end. Memorize it and use it on the next person who questions your sexual preference! GWL
roniheels Posted June 6, 2008 Posted June 6, 2008 Blacksmith25... I am a 54 year old white man who wears men's suits and feminine high heels (at least 5" high heels) publicly every day. And I make it a point to go different places wearing my high heels. Do you think that's weird?
blacksmith25 Posted June 6, 2008 Author Posted June 6, 2008 Blacksmith25... I am a 54 year old white man who wears men's suits and feminine high heels (at least 5" high heels) publicly every day. And I make it a point to go different places wearing my high heels. Do you think that's weird? nah i dont think that is weird roniheels and thanks everyone for the great replies, it helps alot to know that its not weird to other people
gwl1 Posted June 6, 2008 Posted June 6, 2008 Weird is in the eye of the beholder. While most of us think heels look great (i.e., non-weird) on guys, there are a lot people in the world who are very narrow minded and can't imagine heels on a guy, less accept it when they see it, so to them it's weird. Who cares? Wear what looks good and feels good to you. GWL
thedesigner Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 no diffrence to me who's wearing them, the more the better !
JeffB Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 blacksmith25: Bottom line, it's only "weird" if you allow it to be. So, just don't look at things in those restrictive terms. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
raymond.nl Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 there are a lot people in the world who are very narrow minded and can't imagine heels on a guy, less accept it when they see it, so to them it's weird. ... although I just can't seem to find them! I'm slowly expanding the circle of people around me who know about my heeling and have only found neutral to positive responses sofar. As of yesterday that even includes my 20 years younger sister-in-law!
sabotalot Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 Nothing is weird if you are confident in doing it, if it's not "illegal, immoral, or fattening". I went for a long time afraid to wear a particular unisex form of shoe, namely clogs, to work. They border on being associated with the gals (at least the open-back styles which I favor), but one day I said "what the @#$**" and took the bus to work so there:w00t2: would be no turning back; this was the early 80's when such styles were a bit more mainstream for guys; I still wear 'em today (thank-you Bastad-Troentorp), but now frequently wear hh versions of this style; like to show 'em off when at the coin-op laundry, or waiting for a carry-out pizza. Have had no problems, but a pepper-spray is at the ready should some redneck want to really make something of it. Is pepper-spray available outside of the U.S.? Haven't needed it so far. HHPLACE is supreme. (see my post about wearing pumps while having my car repaired)
roniheels Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 ... although I just can't seem to find them! I'm slowly expanding the circle of people around me who know about my heeling and have only found neutral to positive responses sofar. As of yesterday that even includes my 20 years younger sister-in-law! I have responded in a previous post that if family or friends don't accept me wearing high heels, that's their perogative and I appreciate those that do accept me. As BobHH said, weird, no, different, sure. Until high heels for men become the fashion norm as they were in the 70's, we men who enjoy wearing high heels will always be seen as "different."
Tech Posted June 7, 2008 Posted June 7, 2008 if family or friends don't accept me wearing high heels, that's their perogative and I appreciate those that do accept me. Do you really mean "accept" or would "like / dis-like" be more appropriate? Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP!
roniheels Posted June 8, 2008 Posted June 8, 2008 Do you really mean "accept" or would "like / dis-like" be more appropriate? Richie... I think like/dis-like might be too strong to describe their feeling. I've always marched to the beat of a different drummer and my family and close friends know that. So when they see me wearing high heels, they just smile or grin and basically go about their business and let me go about mine. Those who don't want to associate with me because I wear high heels, I don't think it's because they don't like me wearing high heels as much as they don't agree with me wearing high heels, especially in public. Thank you for asking and letting me clarify.
Tech Posted June 8, 2008 Posted June 8, 2008 Richie... I think like/dis-like might be too strong to describe their feeling. I'd say "accepting" or "Not accepting" you is stronger because your implying that that reject you, rather than just simply not-liking you. Every time somebody says they are not accepted, or are seeking acceptance, it gives the impression they dont want to be "rejected", yet all that actually happens here is that people either like, or dislike what your wearing isnt it? Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP!
roniheels Posted June 8, 2008 Posted June 8, 2008 I'd say "accepting" or "Not accepting" you is stronger because your implying that that reject you, rather than just simply not-liking you. Every time somebody says they are not accepted, or are seeking acceptance, it gives the impression they dont want to be "rejected", yet all that actually happens here is that people either like, or dislike what your wearing isnt it? Richie... After some thought, this might be a case of semantics but I think I agree with you that accept/reject is stronger terms than like/dis-like. Accept/reject really seems to apply to more than one person or to a group of people. In the case of my family, I am accepted into all of the family functions at all times, but I know for a fact that some cousins and aunts dis-like the fact that I wear high heels, especially in public. I do appreciate the accptance by my family to be included in all of the get-togethers. And I really don't care about the opinions of those that dis-like me wearing high heels. Again thatnk you for weighing in on this and your thoughts and opinions.
Tech Posted June 8, 2008 Posted June 8, 2008 Ron, I think you worded that perfectly Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP!
Danielinheels Posted June 10, 2008 Posted June 10, 2008 hey everyone im new here and ive loved high heels since i was 3 years old. I have about 30 pairs now and i wanted to know is it weird that a big brolic black cuban guy like me wearing high heels in public? i mean im not tryin to be racist or anything its just i would like to know from another's perspective, so can you guys let me know what you think? Hey, I'm also black (amongst other things, but I definitely pass the one drop rule) and enjoy wearing heels as well. Nothing wrong with it. I've found that the most consistent approval comes from middle-aged Caucasian women, although I've gotten nice compliments from people of all races. You can't really make it a class issue, a race issue, or anything like that. Some people are simply more open to the idea of men wearing heels than others. Most people either approve or are outwardly ambivalent, I've found in my experience. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. - Oscar Wilde
gwl1 Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 Daniel, My experience is the same. The "high heel" gene which we all have is not predominant in any age, race, ethnic, religious, or other group of the population. (The "nylon gene" for those who like to wear legwear is the same way.) They're just preferences we're born with and they can manifest themselves at any time in our lives. Once we're aware of it, we're stuck with it from then on, and it's hopeless and frustrating to try to live without giving in to these urges. So don't fight them! Go with the flow and enjoy your heels (and hose) and celebrate that we were LUCKY enough to be born this way! GWL
Stilettoscot Posted June 11, 2008 Posted June 11, 2008 gwl1...well put! It's amazing how early this "gene" can manifest itself....as early as I can remember. BTW, not weird at all. Walking in ultra-highs because it's exciting...and it is!!
blacksmith25 Posted June 11, 2008 Author Posted June 11, 2008 Also thanks everyone for the good advice i see that it isnt weird now, but before i also didnt find it weird either, its just the people around me throw shit out of proportion and make things small into something huge so i just had to get other opinions thanks
roniheels Posted June 13, 2008 Posted June 13, 2008 Also thanks everyone for the good advice i see that it isnt weird now, but before i also didnt find it weird either, its just the people around me throw shit out of proportion and make things small into something huge so i just had to get other opinions thanks Always remember, and I think you now realize it after all of the responses you received from your thread, you are not alone out there. Ther are plenty of guys like yourself that love to look at, own, and especially wear high heels whether privately or publicly. You've got plenty of friends here.
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