Dr. Shoe Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 So your neighbour saw you coming and going as Tara, but she never knew it was you. You only told her that you were Tara when you got caught. No, it was nothing like that. She liked me from the first time we met but then she started to hear the rumours. Then she saw me coming down the stairs in Tara mode when I was on my way out. It didn't seem to put her off though because we went on our first date shortly afterwards and the rest, as they say, is history. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 With a "closet HH wearer", are you referring to only-in-house HH wearers? Nope. Anyone who keeps their HH wearing away from those close to them. Bubba & FF2: Excellent comments from you both, but you're both making the assumption that the person in question became aware of their inclination towards heels before marrying. That raises a different situation: "Just for clarity", my initial remark was that you should avoid secrets if possible. But I supported the advice, 'fessing up' early in a relationshiip that looks to be going someone, is a real good idea. Tonight, I sat down with my wife and told her about my fetish for High Heels and about my private collection. Phew, what a weight off the shoulders! Slightly embarrassed, I told her everything. How it started, how I have tried to give it up, about finding this forum, how it has helped and why I like wearing the heels. Congratulations! Your biggest worry now, will probably be making sure your collection doesn't compete too well with the 'official' HH wearer, assuming it doesn't already. [Having seen your picture ..... ] I got myself into this situation recently..... Having waaay too many shoes. I keep saying it, but some HAVE to go. But they are there for her to see, and the quantity is slightly embarrassing. My intermediate response was to buy her some 5 1/2" ankle boots like those in my avitar. She is again, "Queen of heels" in the household. A couple of weeks ago, she also bought some Fushia coloured KG 'Honey' style shoes. Saturday just gone, she wore them out under rolled up jeans. Got a lot of attention, I can tell you. "HH dominance" is restored, and I still get free reign to wear pretty much what I want when I please. Which included the rather odd situation experienced last night. Us walking back from a restaurant perhaps a mile and half from home? We had to drive there as I was late back from a family visit. But knowing we were going to have wine with our meal, we were going to walk home and collect the car this morning. She wore heels to the restaurant, me normal mens flats. We had a very romantic meal, then back at the car, she changed into trainers (flats) and I changed into heels. We had an equally romantic walk home with me in 4" heels, with her suggesting we go the 'scenic route' to make sure I got a lonnnnnnng walk out in them..... Surreal? Oh yes. .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightsnheels Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 No, it was nothing like that. She liked me from the first time we met but then she started to hear the rumours. Then she saw me coming down the stairs in Tara mode when I was on my way out. It didn't seem to put her off though because we went on our first date shortly afterwards and the rest, as they say, is history. So I would assume you are still together? How long have you two known each other and does she ever help Tara? Maybe too personal a questions but I for one am just a little bit curious. T&H "Look for the woman in the dress, if there is no dress there is no woman."-Coco Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 "Nearly blew it" .... Got fed up with not walking out locally because of the light evenings, so put some heels on last night and went out with my walking (girl) friend. Place I went to is pretty quiet, along path next to an even long road. Was expecting to meet people walking dogs, and met none. Infused with confidence, and having walked past a couple of (older) men anyway, I decided to walk through a habitated area to get back to my car. 100 yards in, almost walked into a mate getting out of his car, someone I've known since my school-days. I (literally) turned on my heel and walked back from where I came. I'm hoping that since he didn't call me, I may have gotten away with it. We have many common friends, so if I didn't get away with it, I'll doubtless know soon enough. .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stilettoscot Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 Huge congrats, Patent! It is always for the best not to have to hide it. I know it didn't go well when I told my wife, but it was probably HOW I told her that hurt. Basically, I had supressed it while we dated, and about 9 months after we married, we were sitting in our living room. She never wore heels, but had a decent pair of sling-backs that, with a little stretching, I could put on. I had taken a dose of Ambien to sleep, but made the mistake of having a couple glasses of wine, too. In my altered state, I went in, put on her heels, and stumble out to tell her. A little more tact...maybe she would have understood?? No, she's very close-minded...but. The troubling part was a month + back when I had to tell everyone in my life (parents, one sister who didn't know yet, friends...even in-laws [Haitian] who still were close). Relief feels better than wishing you could. Just don't do it hopped up on Ambien and wine! Walking in ultra-highs because it's exciting...and it is!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roniheels Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I am so happy for all of those who have had positive reactions to the confessions of wearing high heels. I have always preached that honesty is the best policy. But there is another old saying...the truth hurts. When I confessed to friends, family, and my ex, it was not initially a pretty sight. I think the hardest part was trying to convince them that I liked to wear high heels, but I wasn't gay. The first high heels I wore in front of everyone were men's boots with a 3" high heel. Most everyone was totally at ease with this, even my ex. But as I got into the more feminine high heels, that was where the rubber met the road. Those who accepted my enjoyment of high heels still hold me as a loved family member or friend. Those who rejected me, to them I have said goodbye and goodluck to them. I have read other stories from other men at this sight who leeped onto the scene in either feminine attire or feminine high heels or both. Discreation is the better part of valor. I'm always happy to hear stories with a happy ending. It looks like Patentheels is headed in that direction. But there is always that old saying, "...reality: what a concept." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flavio Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I have to give my two cents round this thread. As a married guy, my wife knows about my heel wearing. I told her before we got married. It was a nervous day for me. When I was preparing her with words like "I love you so much and I have to tell you something that is hidden from the world, nobody knows and you'll be the first one because I love you so much, it's not a usual thing but I can't hide this from you anymore, we can't get married without you knowing it" she started to be affraid of what I was going to tell her. She thought the worst things in the world. When the preparation got too long, she said "stop it and say soon!!!" I told "I have a passion for women's shoes. But it's not a simple passion, I don't only like to see and admire them but I also like to wear them" she started to laugh. And it was a loud laugh. After the laugh she (and I) was totally relaxed, I showed her some styles on the internet that I like and she told me "you're prohibited to have more shoes then my mom has". Well, after that day the rest is story but my life in heels are far from beeing perfect. I'm not a regular street heeler and she will never aprove that some friend of her sees me in heels at the streets. And yes, I'm affraid to embarass her if someone that knows her sees me in heels. So, I keep my street heeling carefully in selected places to protect HER, not myself. I really don't care if someone label me, but I don't want someone to label her. That's my thoughts about it. Take care of your wifes and respect their rights above everything. A marriage is a matter of two people that are different and have different views and tastes. Flavio - Brazilian heel lover, now in France. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba136 Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 Take Heart, you guys that are struggling with this issue. There's a whole lot of good advice on what and how to do it here. I'm not going to promise that the outcome will be the same, but you can't live with a woman and try to hid this desire. Take it from one who knows.....and, more or less. did the same thing when it became obvious that my relationship with my wife turned into something more than a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thighbooter Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 WOW, this has really been a hard thread for me to read. So many bad memories and experiences brought back. I've been married for way too long, and my wife, while aware of my heeling, is quite literally sickened by it. I've been caught red handed on a few occations, she always makes me swear to toss everything and to fight my desires. She firmly believes that it's just an addiction, and can be beaten like someone would quit smoking. I'd gotten heavy into Scuba Diving when we'd met, and was so wrapped up in that, that I had purged, and thrown all of my shoes and boots and stuff away. I'd thought at the time, that it was no longer a part of my life. But a few years into the marrage, and those desires came flooding back. Yeah, it sucks keeping secrets and lying, but it sucks a lot more haveing to deal with her when she's on a rampage. Either way, I'm screwed. Oh well, my cross to bear I guess. One last note though, it's not just the heels I have to hide. She also goes off on me if she catches me buying new tools, (hobbiest woodworker), or new camera gear, or "ANOTHER D$%#ED GUN!" Too many expensive hobbies I guess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba136 Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Talk about a match where it's hard for a man to be himself - I fee for you. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tech Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 One last note though, it's not just the heels I have to hide. She also goes off on me if she catches me buying new tools, (hobbiest woodworker), or new camera gear, or "ANOTHER D$%#ED GUN!" Too many expensive hobbies I guess. Sounds like no matter what you do, she isnt happy with you? Maybe there are more issues here than just hobbies? Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Loveshiheels Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Your wife don,t seem to like you having hobbies. There's nothing wrong being a woodworker or do you just make cabinets to put all your heels in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Shoe Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Well, why don't you come to my party in July... there's going to be plenty of girls there... Right lads? Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shyguy Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 I didn't get my invite to the last one (or this one yet), but I'd guess the answers yes knowing what I do He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes. Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 One last note though, it's not just the heels I have to hide. She also goes off on me if she catches me buying new tools, (hobbiest woodworker), or new camera gear, or "ANOTHER D$%#ED GUN!" Too many expensive hobbies I guess. Sounds like no matter what you do, she isnt happy with you? Maybe there are more issues here than just hobbies? Rather sadly, I'd have to agree. Either she has to worry about the family budget going to the wall (a little too much spending), or (and what looks like the case) you have such a busy life without her, she's a bit unhappy at the competition? 'Cos you certainly seem to have a full life without her? Although that does rather assume she isn't interested in workworking too? Well, why don't you come to my party in July... there's going to be plenty of girls there... Right lads? I didn't get my invite to the last one (or this one yet) ..... I've not seen an invite either? .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stilettoscot Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Thigh Booter, I feel for you, man. Guessing there's so many things that are good about your marraige to "put up" with the bad, it's still bad to "have" to supress feelings that you have known forever. I do have to seriously question anyone who would deny the person they love what makes them extremely happy, especially since doing so does NOT hurt anyone! I just don't see why anyone would want to "force" the onces they "love" to supress their love... Dr Shoe, Can you PLEASE have a party across the pond aver here?? Walking in ultra-highs because it's exciting...and it is!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PatentHeel Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Well its been over a week now since I told the wife about my little secret and life is continuing as normal for us. It's funny now though, when she's going out, she reminds me about the little jobs around the house and says "don't get distracted!" When she didn't know about my heeling, if i asked her genuinely how long she would be out of the house for (so I could get tea ready), she would say "i'll ring you and let you know". Now it feels kind of funny asking her questions like that because i feel she's gonna be thinking that I can't wait for her to leave so I can don the heels lol. The first time she was going out after I confessed we both laughed as she said goodbye. My reply at the time was "Nope, not got time for that today love". Come to think of it, I still haven't worn heels since I told her! It was funny the other day though, I had some skirts and stockings delivered. She asked me what was in the package, i replied "just a skirt and some stockings". Never ever thought i'd be saying that to the wife. Ah, its good to talk! PatentHeel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 It was funny the other day though, I had some skirts and stockings delivered. She asked me what was in the package, i replied "just a skirt and some stockings". Never ever thought i'd be saying that to the wife. Ah, its good to talk! PatentHeel While we walked past a shoe shop today, I was seen <by herself> to look in the shop window. Before I could suggest going inside, came the response; "Don't bother, the heels aren't high enough for you." So we carried on walking .... Being this close over something so intimate, is like a little bit of magic, ain't it? ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stilettoscot Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 I am very happy for you, Patent. By the sound of it, she seems to be totally comfortable with it. You never know where that will lead between you and her in the future! All the best! Walking in ultra-highs because it's exciting...and it is!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Histiletto Posted June 16, 2008 Share Posted June 16, 2008 Come to think of it, I still haven't worn heels since I told her! It was funny the other day though, I had some skirts and stockings delivered. She asked me what was in the package, i replied "just a skirt and some stockings". Never ever thought i'd be saying that to the wife. Ah, its good to talk! PatentHeel I'm real happy that both of you are working on your relationship to build upon what you have. There are going to be times that will still cause the heeling activities to go on a type of trial between you. We are who we are and everyone has inner desires that need fulfillment. Some are socially compatible and accepted, while others would reap a lot of discomfort, if commonly known. Make sure you both are engaged in fulfilling each other's desires with the respect and love you have for one another. Keep your dreams and goals together actively alive so that the magic is forever present. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightsnheels Posted June 17, 2008 Share Posted June 17, 2008 Ahh, time is a wonderful thing to add to a marriage. During our twenty years together my mode of dress has had its purgings and splurgings. Hiding from the children and the children knowing all along. (You can't hide much in a three woman housold.) Talking and having everything out in the open is a very good thing. My wife knew long before we were married and from things I have read here it was a good thing. T&H "Look for the woman in the dress, if there is no dress there is no woman."-Coco Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 17, 2008 Share Posted June 17, 2008 Hiding from the children and the children knowing all along. (You can't hide much in a three woman housold.) T&H There has GOT to be a good story about this here? .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightsnheels Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 Ah not much of a story really. I/we have raised our daughters to be very open minded, they respect everyone accepting that each is unique. A man in a skirt to them is a man dressed to his own liking. When they were younger they found images of Sean Connery at an awards ceramony in a kilt and it allowed us to teach that kilts/skirts are traditional modes of dress in many cultures just not our closed minded culture and that their was nothing wrong with it. It helped that they respected him as an actor though. Eventually they caught me in a pair of flats that I had on without thinking and I was told not to worry because they figured it out years ago from the way I raised them! Need I mention they are both hyper-intellegent? (Unlike my spelling ability.) My wife knew from early on when we were dating so no news there. It only made my life easier in general not having to hide from them. They help with styles, they give me moral support when I get chicken after going somewhere, they feel for me when I can't wear what I want. It gives us quite the unique relationship as my opinions on their clothes and shoes are accepted as an almost equal and at that equal to my wife. So as I said not much of a story to tell but I wish everyone here had the understanding home life I have. T&H "Look for the woman in the dress, if there is no dress there is no woman."-Coco Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roniheels Posted June 21, 2008 Share Posted June 21, 2008 So as I said not much of a story to tell but I wish everyone here had the understanding home life I have. T&H Tightsnheels... I am so happy for you amd all of the other men with understanding spouses and significant others who understand and endorse their lifestyle. I have said it before, and it still applies wheter it is a happy ending or not: Honesty is always the best policy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted June 22, 2008 Share Posted June 22, 2008 Eventually they caught me in a pair of flats that I had on without thinking and I was told not to worry because they figured it out years ago from the way I raised them! That's the bit I'm after, and I know from talking to members here who are parents (like you), others here are at least as interested as I am. I've no need to worry, but there maybe some out there who might prefer their children didn't 'wise up' to their interests? Your children, and it's especially true of girls I expect, will love you even if you had a desire to wear candy-floss wigs. Though it's certainly warming to hear they participate where they can. I think it sounds like you're a great father. <bless you> ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
William Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Wow! Lot's of similarities here. Having grown up in the late 70's, I was quite content to be wearing 4" - 5" platforms in public. All my high school friends and I were the same size, and we shared many shoes. Once, we all went in together to buy an outrageous pair of 7" platforms. I couldn't wait to get my turn. I'm curious to know what those heels meant to the rest of my friends. Maybe it was just "cool". Loved those days.... Prior to sharing my interest in heels with my wife, I would have been described as a purger. I'd buy a hh shoe, wear it for a few days/weeks, then toss it in a goodwill drop-off. I'm not one who wanted to keep anything from my wife, so after a few years of frustrations, I decided to do something about it. I told her that I'd ordered a few things for the both of us. I didn't tell her what I had ordered, but I let her know that what I had ordered would fulfill a personal fantasy of mine. (Which it did!!!) I told her that if anything came by delivery in the next few days, she was not to open anything. After a few weeks of waiting, everything I had ordered was finally in. I was so freaking horny, you would not believe! She had been getting very curious too. On a Friday night, when she came home from work, there was a note on the door, to go directly to the bedroom, get completely undressed, and open the first box. It contained a beautiful satin thong and a note telling her where to find the next box. Inside the next box, there was a beautfully sexy corset and nightgown for her to wear, and a note telling her where to find the next box. In the last box, was a pair of black platform mules with 7" heels in her size, and a note telling her to walk back into the living room. While she was changing, I pulled all the blinds shut, lit all the candles, poured drinks, and put in a sexy jazz cd. I got dressed for the occasion too. I had ordered a leather harness and thong, and a pair of thigh high boots with 7.5" heels. I wore the boots for hours that day trying to make sure I was used to the extra height. When she saw me, she was actually very excited. I guess it could have gone either way, but I'm very glad for her approval. She obviously "got" how excited I was to be in those boots! And, she definately got how much I enjoyed seeing her in all her new clothes. That night goes down as the best sex night either of us have ever had. Following some discussion after a fews days of glow, she asked how long I've wanted to buy those boots. I confessed to having tried womens shoes on, and being arroused by the feel of a really high heel. She knows I'm not gay, so that fear of accusation wasn't an issue. She did ask if I get arroused seeing other people in heels. I said, "yep, sure do". And without hesitation, I said, "I'd give a blow job to any memeber of KISS if I had the chance, but not Prince". And, she said, "totally, gotcha". Since then, we've ordered many boots and shoes for both of us. I'm jealous of any couple with the same shoe size! I've even bought some shoes and worn them home from out of town trips; it's a total turn-on. It's cool to throw on heels when I get home from work. Sometimes, she'll even suggest it (naughty girl). Give it a try. Wil Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heelma Posted June 25, 2008 Share Posted June 25, 2008 Ahh, time is a wonderful thing to add to a marriage. During our twenty years together my mode of dress has had its purgings and splurgings. Hiding from the children and the children knowing all along. (You can't hide much in a three woman housold.) One more reason to keep my heels at work rather than at home... and wait for a good occasion to wear them somewhere on the street where nobody from home ever goes to.... Sorry, I'll stick with my strategy to keep everything secret. Worked for years, and will continue to do so for the time to come. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tightsnheels Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Heelma I wish you all the luck in your endevors and only good fortune if you are ever found out or decide to come out. Your position is rough and only you know how to handle it. T&H "Look for the woman in the dress, if there is no dress there is no woman."-Coco Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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