Novelty.

[ilikekicks]

I have seen some other topics of such on this site and know that probably a few people ( JeffB, Kneeehighs, Shafter, Dr. Shoe ) and others might have similar feelings. This evening I went out with the Wife ( seems so odd saying that now.. damn.. ) and some friends. A local Dennies for a late night snack ( Omelet! Ham and cheese and all that fattening stuff! Clog my arteries please! ) with another couple whom we go out with all the time. We ran into some friends there and wound up shoving all of our tables together and having a rather large ( about 10 people ) social event talking about new years and where I was gig-ing ( playing ) this year and if there were tickets available ( or if they could come ). Its been a while since Ive seen some of them after being cooped up this whole past summer/fall. Out of nowhere, the waitress was speaking with one of the guys. He was single and he was a good ' wing man ' for a number of years.. I figured he was scoring some digits ( getting her phone number ). He smiles, looks at me and then starts laughing.. The waitress kind of shown some embarrassment and then walked away with her hand over her mouth.. I was wondering what kind of joke I was the blunt of. " Dude.. she likes your shoes! She asked me if I knew where the person with the brown hair bought them and I just said - go ask him, how would I know?-. I think she might have mistaken you. Sad thing is, I thought nothing of it and said it as if its happened before.. " Nobody at the table really seemed like it was odd at all. Nobody even bothered to see what was on my feet. Later on, the woman came by to apologize if she embarrassed me. I told her she didnt. Darian ( wife ) went on to tell her everything about what I was wearing and where it came from and what it cost.. THAT was embarrassing. She went as far as to get the digits for Tommy.. Nobody cared. Nobody flinched. Im starting to see the whole concept of ' Novelty ' wearing off. I dont find what I wear on my feet to be anything overly special. Sure, there will be some pairs of shoes that I believe I will really enjoy, but.. I just dont get a rush of wearing heels like I might have once or twice in the beginning. The odd part is those around me.. they arent embarrassed and dont see any ' big deal ' either. The way Tommy put it to the waitress.. ( I should rephrase that, hes not THAT good/lucky! Dar wound up getting the digits for him! ) I mean in what he said to her.. I know Kneehighs goes to clubs and flirts.. I know Shafted has his McD's/breakfast outing with the paper.. JeffB goes out on his Jaunts all over the universe .. Theres so many people ( sorry if I didnt mention you ) whom just go out like its nothing special, ' no big deal ' Im wondering if its become more of a routine then anything else? The wife drove home as I wanted to think about this. Walking into my house, I have a ' shoe try ' by the door ( rubber mat with raised sides to catch melted snow/water ). Theres not a single pair of ' mens footware ' there. 3 pairs of Ugg boots, My NineWest pinktops, 3 pairs of Sketchers Energy series sneakers, Darians pink wedge flip-flops ( I hate those F-ing things! ), 2 pairs of Dar's tall boots and 3 pairs of her Office shoes.. On the wall is a Coat rack. Brass hooks on an ornamental piece of polished Hickory with real brass hooks.. 5 coats, none are mens.. I havent given thought to any of this in a while. It just ' didnt matter '. Maybe it was because of medical issues or maybe/actually it really just ' doesnt matter '. Does anyone else feel the ' Novelty ' of heels has worn off on you? That its like a ' numb ' issue? Sincerely -Ilk

[Curt]

I think friends get used to it after a while. They have to support you because they are your friends! My parents will never get used to it, mostly my mother. She totally hates it! As for me, heels are no different than flats, just look better.

[JeffB]

Well, that was certainly an interesting little outing you had, my friend. On the topic of the "novelty" of high heels having worn off, I can't speak for any of the others here, but in my case, I'd say yes, but that's not at all a bad thing, at least not in my mind. I would say what it means is that what we do has become an enjoyable, comfortable routine, we simply put on the shoes and/or clothes we like and go about our business, nothing more, nothing less.

[freestyle75]

For me it still depends on a ) the type of shoe I am wearing b ) who I meet whether it is a novelty or not. Apart from the recently bought stiletto heeled boots, all other heeled footwear I own doesn't have this "novelty" feeling to it. Most people who know don't care or even want to know where I got this pair from. When I had gotten my Jil Sander wedges, my hairdresser told me that she loves these boots and would really like to get this pair as it is exactly her style. It is different though, when I meet people that haven't seen me for a long time or just know me from a different setting. Just a few weeks ago, I was taking a walk at a river where I live to feed some ducks, dressed in jeggings, Marc Jacobs knee-high equestrian boots and a Peuterey (women's) puffer coat as I like the more fitted style. As I am walking, a cyclist approaches from behind, closes the gap to me, looks at me and goes "if that isn't my old friend {myname}". He was an old friend from 12 years back when I was at university. Mind you: I didn't walk around the way I dress today back then. We talked for around an hour while walking next to the river, talking about our peers from university, jobs, friends, cars, latest gadgets and bikes. He never blinked an eye or mentioned the way I was dressed. I don't know why, and I also didn't want to address it, but it felt sort of strange. Later I wondered whether this is going to be the gossip around those he still knows from university. When I thought about this, I realized that I actually don't care. He didn't seem to have a problem with this (otherwise he wouldn't have talked to me for so long), and if he did, he could have told me. Still.... this was a novelty to me, as this was somewhat different to someone who never has met / seen you differently. Same applies if I would meet someone from the office: I haven't told anybody there that I've got a collection of heels that is probably bigger than some collections the girls own (sometimes I ask myself if it is healthy to own more pairs of women's footwear than men's). It's a very conservative work environment, so I respect the unwritten rules (dresscode). People there know that I spend much on clothing, but they see a guy in a suit, with well made (men's) shoes. I am within the country management staff, so anything outside the norm could potentially damage my career. If I met someone from the office while wearing heels (e.g. when going shopping in the city), then so be it. I would still say that this is what I like, but actively pointing my colleagues / employees towards this fact, I won't do. Regarding parents: I know they would hate it, so don't ask, don't tell. I still have some men's footwear that I wear when visiting my parents. Funny thing though: My mom (in her early 60s) normally only wears flats, but bought some heeled boots two months ago. They do have a very moderate 2 inch cuban block heel. My mom later told me that these are "really difficult" to walk in, since the heel is so high. I laughed to myself in that moment - if she only knew... maybe I should show her how to properly walk in those boots

[Curt]

That's funny! Were used to wearing 4"+ heels around here, some higher. Give her a few pointers!

[Steve63130]

Ilk, Interesting post and good topic for discussion. I'm always amazed at how most people just don't notice, or if they do they don't say anything. But in my case, yes, the novelty continues to wear off. I gauge novelty by how much I watch other people to see if they notice. Most don't and I'm pretty relaxed these days, and I've really stopped paying much attention to others. I just go about my business like I belong in the heels I wear. And that's good. I can just be me and not have to worry about what others think. Steve

[AZShoeNut]

You know, sometimes I wonder if that is not the goal that I have in mind. I remember talking with a girl that I hung out with in high school about what it was like to walk in heels. She wore a killer pair of white 4+inch pumps. She told me that after a while you don’t even realize that you are wearing heels. That blew me away. At that time I had never walked more that thirty feet or so in heels and I could not imagine getting to a point that I didn't realize that they were on my feet. I spent a lot of time really hoping that if I ever got to wear heels more than just around the house that I would never lose the sensation of stepping out in heels the first time. Now that I wear heels a lot more than I used to and even more so since I am now wearing them out and about more I find that I barely feel the height of my super tall 5-inch black wedges. Now for the most part I consider the sensations of walking in heels to truly be a delicacy of the senses. Nearly every step is exhilarating. I, however, also am every so slightly, starting to sense a bit of a drop in the excitement. Now that I know why I have developed such a “thing” for heels and now that I am getting to wear my heels I am starting to wonder if the huge desire to wear heels will start to drift into something that I do just because it is nifty. Then perhaps after that, since I can wear heels nearly whenever I want to, I see it possible that my desire to wear heels may diminish even further. I think that for literally decades I wanted to wear my heels and go do things. After the initial rush of doing it as much as I want then perhaps it might just mellow. I would be okay with it should that be the case. I don’t know that it would so much be novelty wearing off as it would be chilling out after making up for lost time. One thing for sure is that the path that I have been following with heels has been totally dynamic and that I am not always sure where the next bend in the road will take me. I’ll just enjoy the ride while headed down this path. Best, Larry

[HappyinHeels]

ilikekicks, I think what you experienced at Denny's with your friends is typical of what happens over space and time as HiStilletto pointed out. What was once a novelty to you has become a normal part of your environment, what appears out-of-the-ordinary for one (the waitress) is now very routine for everyone else. Your emotions have grown to match your expectations. Wearing heels on daily basis has given you the expectation of going about your business WITHOUT the anxiety of before when wearing heels was a new experience and you may have worried about reactions thay you now know have been rendered moot. If you think about it there are quite a few accounts by members here of the expectations of others. Once the people around you start seeing you in heels, scarves, women's style jackets, etc. that becomes their expectation. Show up without heels and they'll start asking "dude, like I was looking forward to seeing what heels you'd be rocking today and you let me down." I have spent more time in 5" and 6"-heel boots this Christmas shopping season than ever before and I see what you are saying. I was always wearing a a woman's style jacket and bootcut jeans and shopped from Macy's to Kay Jewelers to Bakers to Steve Madden and appeared to have moved about without disrupting the world around. Keep rocking the world ilk and keep doing it in your unique style. HappyinHeels

[ilikekicks]

Well, that was certainly an interesting little outing you had, my friend. On the topic of the "novelty" of high heels having worn off, I can't speak for any of the others here, but in my case, I'd say yes, but that's not at all a bad thing, at least not in my mind. I would say what it means is that what we do has become an enjoyable, comfortable routine, we simply put on the shoes and/or clothes we like and go about our business, nothing more, nothing less.

Your quite correct about it ' not being a bad thing '. Its just become a total ' third thought ', not even a second thought about what I wear. I just grab something, throw it on and out the door I go .

It is ' routine ' now though. Just a daily thing that ' doesnt matter ' anymore. Those around me dont even have any stigmatism at all. Even when the waitress and Tommy had their little event, nobody even bothered to look at what I was wearing. ( It might have been that their faces were in the menues and they couldnt be bothered . I COULD be wrong )

ilikekicks,

I think what you experienced at Denny's with your friends is typical of what happens over space and time as HiStilletto pointed out. What was once a novelty to you has become a normal part of your environment, what appears out-of-the-ordinary for one (the waitress) is now very routine for everyone else.

I was at Tommy's today to give him those digits and return his sawsall ( Started on Janices walls today ). I wore a pair of OTK Wedge boots. His room mate answered the door, let me in. I was about to take off my boots and he said " dont bother, rugs need to be cleaned anyway. ". I dont know this guy outside of saying hello a few times.

Did he ask about my boots at all? Nope. I was there for an hour, not a single question.

Your emotions have grown to match your expectations. Wearing heels on daily basis has given you the expectation of going about your business WITHOUT the anxiety of before when wearing heels was a new experience and you may have worried about reactions thay you now know have been rendered moot.

I have to be honest, Ive been weird all my life. some would say I was a young ' rebel ' type but I was just one whom did my own thing but in the process was mindful of others. Not a ' total rebel ' at heart. I still remember the first ' jaunts ' I had out in Heels. I really had no worries. It was an experiment to see what the fuss was about.

If you think about it there are quite a few accounts by members here of the expectations of others. Once the people around you start seeing you in heels, scarves, women's style jackets, etc. that becomes their expectation. Show up without heels and they'll start asking "dude, like I was looking forward to seeing what heels you'd be rocking today and you let me down."

OMG! That has happened! Its usually friends wives or their girlfriends moreso then the guys. Its happened recently too!

I have spent more time in 5" and 6"-heel boots this Christmas shopping season than ever before and I see what you are saying. I was always wearing a a woman's style jacket and bootcut jeans and shopped from Macy's to Kay Jewelers to Bakers to Steve Madden and appeared to have moved about without disrupting the world around. Keep rocking the world ilk and keep doing it in your unique style. HappyinHeels

Thank you for the kind words! Happy new years to you!

Note : There are other responses I didnt reply to. I will come back for them, Im kinda in a rush packing for monday night and I need to break down some things here.

-Ilk

[SleekHeels]

I think my personal sense of novelty has worn off in the sense that it feels comfortable and natural for me to wear my heels. But they're still exciting to wear and that's the pure pleasure of wearing them rather than the "thrill of the forbidden".

Different from that, I still feel like it's a novelty to others who see me, and in that respect the change is that I don't mind being a bit of a novelty, I'm not afraid of it, perhaps I've even learned to like it. At the same time I don't need that sense of novelty, I get just as much a buzz from the acceptance of not being noticed as I do from being noticed.

[Heelster]

I was at a local hospital recently. Kinda late and quiet. I'm walking through the halls in mens cowboy boots. All of the sudden I hear this little boy yelling at his mother - - Mommy, He's got heels on!! - No dear, they are just cowboy boots. With some of the holiday gatherings, I do kinda dress up a bit more, which means western boots. The wife has taken to double checking to make sure what I have on my feet. It's kinda hillarious, but I understand her reasonings. The novelty - - - not over yet.

[ChipsHH]

Wearing high heels in public is like playing a brand-new copy of a video game. You're excited to play it, depending on how engrossing and deep the story is, you continue playing it. Once beaten, you attempt to up the difficulty (if such a setting is around) and beat it once more if you'd like. After awhile, it begins feeling like everything you do in the game is very...similar. Sometimes, missions are just the same. Others, you're just very much accustomed to the controls and know your way around the game [map]. Close similarities with heels: you're excited for your first-time out and about, confidence levels rise and you're ready to keep going at it, you challenge yourself with other heel types if you'd like. After awhile, the next time you go out and about, it's almost second-nature to you. But no matter where you go on the map, you just know that you are who you are and should be treatly no differently than you usually are. I hope I made sense, at 5am New Years' Day. Happy New Years, everyone, by the way