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Salut everyone!

My name is Twilight and I'm a 24 year-old straight man from Hungary. It's been several months since I registered here, only now I'm introducing myself because originally when I registered, I just wanted to look around the website without engaging too much but it didn't feel right not talking about myself for so long.

I've been wearing high heels since 2007 (I was 9 or 10) when I noticed that months earlier my mom purchased a very great-looking black leather pumps (it had a 5-6cm heel if I remember correctly) that she never used up to that point. When I was a little kid I always looked at high heels as the "cool shoes" due to their aesthetic, the knocking sound they make when someone walks in them and how much taller someone looked when they put them on. I knew that boys don't tend to wear these kinds of shoes, but frankly, I didn't care (I never truly cared what was popular with other boys) and I desparately wanted to try them on myself to see what it's like and how I look in them. The shoe in question was sitting in a wardrobe for months never being worn to the street, so one day, I waited until everyone left home and decided to sneak up to that wardrobe and put those shoes on. It was love at first "sight"!! Sure, I looked hideous in them (there was like a 5cm gap between my heel and the back-side of the shoe), but I really-really loved the feel it gave. At that moment I knew that - despite me being a boy - it was a feeling I couldn't live without anymore. After a few minutes of toddling around in them (thank God I didn't fell), I put them back the exact same way it was before I touched them, and from that point onwards I always made sure to wear them at least for a few minutes whenever I was home alone. I got totally addicted to it and it felt like the forbidden fruit for me. It wasn't long until my mom caught me (not while wearing it, but because I misplaced the shoes slightly in the wardrobe) and explained to me how normal guys should never, under any circumstance wear these kinds of shoes for any reason whatsoever. This was the first time I can remember when I got angry at my mom for a legitimate reason, and this what I consider as the source of my introversion and why I tend to keep things to myself. Up to that point I felt like I could talk with my mom honestly about anything, share anything I wanted with her without angry judgement. If there was one person I could ask about literally anything, it'd be her. I was wrong. When she left home, I started to cry. It felt like my new favorite toy was being taken away from me with no compensation for the sacrifice. I reluctantly agreed that I won't wear those shoes again, I had no other choice, but it was clear for me from Day 0 that I won't be able to live up that promise. I was able to keep it for about 6 months, but after that, I was back to wearing them whenever I could. I just had to wear those shoes, I was missing that elavated feeling so much! Afterwards, it wasn't long until I was "caught slippin" again and - to put it lightly - she wasn't happy about it. She called me a sexually misaligned person and gay multiple times (even though I never was, the sight of naked handsome guys never turned me on sexually and it's a pretty immature thing to assume just because I happened to like wearing high heels) and she said that she'll never expect me to ever be in a real relationship or have grand-children from me. Nonetheless, I carried on fighting for my high-heel-addiction, but from then on, I became a lot more careful about when I wear them and how I put them back when I'm done.

Fast-forward a couple of years and my brother broke up with his girlfriend. She had a couple of items at our place which my brother all returned to her as soon as the "deal was done". Except for one. A beautiful white ~7cm high heeled sandal that she originally wore on her prom and then never again. It was completely forgotten, in the bottom of a wardrobe, even I didn't know we had it and not even the girlfriend was looking for it. It happened in early 2012, so by this point point, it's safe to assume they totally forgot about it. :D It wasn't until months later when I unearthed and re-discovered it. I couldn't believe my eyes. Originally, it didn't feel right for me to just "inherit" someone else's shoes like that, but after a little bit of thinking, I realised that I was only 15 at that time and wasn't quite yet able to organize a "handover-meetup" with this girl all alone without mentioning it to someone in my family. If I would've mentioned it to someone, my mom would know it as well, and yeah... not a wise thing to do. From that point onwards, I considered it as a gift from God, for all the hardships I had to go through in my youth and hid it as deeply in one of my tiny chests I had at the time as I could. I wore that sandal A LOT, I still have it and cherish it to this day, but it definitely shows it's age despite me taking good care of it and never wearing it to street. It says it's size 38 but my current foot is size 43 and can still wear it just fine, it literally expanded with my feet due to me wearing it so much, growing up alongside me, if you will. Up until 2019, it was the only high heel I owned, until I decided to overcome my nerves and started going to stores as man looking for high heels and buying them.

Back in 2012-2013, I did wear a few of my mom's shoes to the street before I progressively outgrew them (overall 5-6 times) but we live in the middle of the capital city and I was so nervous that I have no idea how I'm still alive today and didn't die in heart attack back then. It was just 20-30 minutes of walking per occasion but I passed at least 500-600 people each time. A few weird looks (and my heart rate being 3000BPM) aside, everything went smoothly each time. Didn't want to wear my "God-gifted" irreplaceable beautiful white sandals to the dirty streets and didn't want to risk dying either, so I haven't wore high heels in public ever since.

And just like that, I'm a grown-ass man who's today a proud owner of 5 pairs of high heels, crushing on a girl who likes guys that also have a bit of a feminine side, I have a lot in common with her and I pray to God that things will eventually turn out well with her. Still living with my mom, I love her and have respect for her but I don't care what she thinks about this side of me anymore.

I know it's quite a lot for a simple introduction, but I just had to finally get this story off my chest after so many years. Thanks for reading and if you have any questions, comment below! Cheers!!

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Welcome!  I enjoyed the introduction and the stories!  What kind of high heels do you own now?  Do you still have desire to wear heels in public?

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6 hours ago, Twilight said:

And just like that, I'm a grown-ass man

Forgive me for saying this, but that is possibly one of the most American idioms you could have possibly uttered, or in this case, technically, written. Dude, I totally get it, I was 40 years old before I realized I was a grown-ass man and could wear what I wanted.

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11 hours ago, p1ng74 said:

Welcome!  I enjoyed the introduction and the stories!  What kind of high heels do you own now?  Do you still have desire to wear heels in public?

Hi! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

My collecetion in chronological order:

- a white leather Ariane sandal, it has a 7cm high square-shaped heel (was perfect for learning how to properly walk in high heels)

- a black leather Graceland pump, 8.5cm high spike heel (this is the one I wear the most, it's almost constantly on my feet when I'm in my room, even during sleep)

- a white leather Granceland sandal, 7.5cm blocky heel

- a clear PVC pump I ordered from Aliexpress, 10cm spike heel (still have a tough time wearing it for long)

- a black over-the-knee boots, 10cm spike heel with 4-5cm platform (bought it just a few weeks ago)

As for wearing them in public, I don't really want to. Maybe in a very remote place where nobody lives / goes to. I'm a shy dude and way too scared to randomly meet someone who knows me while wearing them and getting me exposed.

7 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Forgive me for saying this, but that is possibly one of the most American idioms you could have possibly uttered, or in this case, technically, written. Dude, I totally get it, I was 40 years old before I realized I was a grown-ass man and could wear what I wanted.

What can I say, I like American culture!

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Thanks for sharing your story, and welcome!  Hope you enjoy your time here.

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Welcome Twilight!  Glad you are here and feel comfortable enough to share your story...  You are not alone, your heeling journey sounds very familiar indeed.  I enjoy wearing high heel boots, it feels great to wear them in public, usually under levis though.  

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