Small steps...

[jeremy1986]

As I have mentioned on a number of occasions, I wear heels solely at home, save for one or 2 outings with flat boots. My wife knows, and tolerates it to a certain degree, and has gone heel shopping with me a couple of times. Occasionally I wear them with her around, and her reactions have been getting progressively less 'reactive' over the last few months. She will see me wearing a pair and say something like 'ooh, I see you chose some heels' or ask if they are comfortable. I don't know whether its because she is getting used to seeing me wearing them (only once every 3 weeks or so), or because she is trying to ignore. 

anyway - I was working from home today, wearing my 5" block heels (see some snaps below from my gallery) with a contrast heel. I wore them the other day and they really went well with my narrow (though not skinny) pants. So I decided to wear them today, knowing she would be back from shopping soon. She saw them and made a small comment as above, and then moved onto telling me stories etc. I joined her in the kitchen as she cooked, and then I decided to join her with some preparations. she was wearing slips lops (bleh) and me in my 5" heels! But it seemed all natural, and she appreciated that I joined her. I did a fair amount of walking about while there and the click-clock could not have gone unnoticed, but I didn't see any sneers and she certainly didn't make any annoyed remarks, which I definitely see as something positive.

Yes - I know most of you guys will say I do not need to ask for permission, its my right to choose my footwear bla bla..  and yet still - I would like my choice to be accepted and not something that causes friction or tension (there is enough of that even without this...). So yes - doing this 'right' and not overdoing things is something I am trying to do - but still trying to get the doses of heeling that I need and want. (I do heel more often, just not always when she is around).

 

 

[pebblesf]

Jeremy-

I'm agree with you buddy....Keep up the great work....

[Cali]

Nice pumps. Keep it simple around your wife.  Let her see that wearing heels makes no difference in who you are (only now your taller).  My ex-wife was over a week or so back (dropping off something she borrowed) and her only comment was, "you'll really tall in those heels".

[bootedlawyer]

Hi Jeremy,

May I suggest that you maybe show her that there are other men like you that enjoy fem fashion without becoming a parody of a woman? I am suggesting that because women's opinion are generally very much influenced by "others".

For example, women around here used to find men with big beards unnattractive. Then for some reason it became a trend 2-3 years ago (that has since faded out) and lo and behold, most women started finding it "sexy". If by some reason tomorrow most men started wearing heels, most women would object at first and then at some point their perception would change.

The bottom line seems to be that if you demonstrate to her that you are not the only man on the face of the earth to enjoy fem fashion (outside of CD / TV / TG communities), she might open up juuuust a little bit more.

This is a theory though and you might've already done that, I don't know. Anyway, report back.

[Pierre1961]

You are right. But men are the same. We can change our mind the sane way for the same reason. 

It  could work if some very well known people ( politicians, singers, actress,business men ) suddenly decide to wear heels. 

That wont happen tomorrow morning 

Then we could imagine we wouldn’t be compared anymore to C.D./TV/TG. Because that’s THE reason why. 

We are not C.D. nor TV neither TV. ( I highly respect them because they are honest) We wear the same shoes! So we are considered as we must be part of one of these communities  

it could be very negative but I can’t feel any sign that could make me think that the number of narrow minded people is decreasing. 

Congratumations to the ones who made their HH coming out.And keep on living hidden and happy for the others  

Pierre 

 

[bootedlawyer]

Hi Pierre,

What you just said is the main reason I am not afraid to dress the way I want in public anymore.

The day society at large can do / like something without needing kim kardashian or some other such useless celebrities to do it first, THEN I might start granting credibility to their judgment on my fashion choices.

I never cared much for sheeps' opinions, I don't see why I should in the fashion sphere either.

Edited October 27, 2017 by bootedlawyer

[Steve63130]

Jeremy,

Thanks for sharing your story. It sounds like a huge milestone for you to wear heels around your wife at home without her saying anything negative. You can build on this in a couple of ways. If you sense that she's really trying to accept you in heels, you can thank her for being accepting. Tell her you had a good time wearing them, and it means a lot to you, but not more than she does. Make sure you continue to give her a hand with household tasks. Go out of your way to show her love - whatever she likes - flowers, a nice dinner out, diamonds, rubies, etc.! Make sure she knows you love her and appreciate that she's trying to get her head around your love of wearing heels. Do this for several months without pushing the envelope further. Once she is confident that you're the same guy she married only better, she'll be more accepting and make your leash longer. You'll have a little more freedom, but never push too fast. Make sure she's the center of attention and not the heels. 

Take your time as you move on your journey. Savor each day. It took me 20 years for my wife to get comfortable with my footwear choices. But it was worth the effort!

Steve

[hernaezjames]

On 10/27/2017 at 4:29 PM, jeremy1986 said:

 

 

Nice pumps! Love it. Ive seen your gallery and you got really nice pairs that are my favorites. 

[jeremy1986]

6 hours ago, hernaezjames said:

Nice pumps! Love it. Ive seen your gallery and you got really nice pairs that are my favorites. 

Thanks @hernaezjames! I like to think of my style as contemporary/classic - and not the latest fashion or fetish-wear. 

@Steve63130 - so sorry I never got to respond to your comment. You are totally right. we have been having ups and down in our marriage and are working on it: Not heel-related... 
I just wish she would wear her heels more (or  - at all) - it would turn me right on, and I would probably say "yes" to anything   But you are right - I think in general - the more one side pays in, the more they get back. In healthy situations anyway.  That's for the encouragement!