Fraternity Pledge force to wear heels

[hh_pe]

Earlier this week, I was taking an evening class at the University of California Los Angeles (UCLA).  When I left the building and started walking to the parking garage, I saw a young man crossing the street wearing pumps. What drew my attention to him was his stride, or I should say lack of. He walked horribly in the heels.  Each step looked painful for him, and was for me to watch.  Everyone around the intersection knew he was wearing heels because he had shorts on.  Once he got to the other side of the street, he found a bench, sat down, and put his head in his hands.  Seeing this, I began to think he was a fraternity pledge and this was part of his "rite of passage".  Since he was alone, and many of the other kids were staring and pointing at him, I figured I would offer him some advice on wearing heels. When I sat down on the beach, he didn't move or look up.  At this point I could tell the shoes were plain black pumps with about a three inch heel and were a bit small for him. To break the ice, I asked him which fraternity was he pledging.  He looked up, gave me a response and said this was the most humiliating thing he ever had to do. After some more small talk about the stuff they made him do, I asked him how did he get forced into wearing heels. It was a punishment for not bringing enough girls to a party.  I was never in a fraternity, so this seemed like a really stupid reason to humiliate someone.  I asked how long was he required to wear the heels.  He had until the next party, which was several days away.  I told him his heels were too small for his feet, which explained why he had such a difficult time walking in them.  I also recommended he get a bigger size with a lower heel for the next time he has to do this.  After giving a few more tips, I told him to walk with confidence holding his head up high.  If he looked confident walking in heels, then people would be less likely to say negative things.  He finally asked me how do I know this. I just told him I've been wearing heels for years, smiled, and showed him my Aerosoles Accomplishments. I told him the shoes are considered flats, and are more comfortable than any men's dress shoe I own. I did tell him I have a few pairs of heels with 2-1/2 inch heels that I occasionally wear in public. I wished him good luck and then headed to my car.

 

[swedeheeler]

That was a really nice thing of you to do.  

[pebblesf]

Good for you buddy, the experience will be less of a "punishment" with your advice and support.

[Thighbootguy]

2 hours ago, swedeheeler said:

That was a really nice thing of you to do.  

Indeed it was a nice thing to do.  I hope he took your advice.

[Bubba136]

Wearing high heels because you like/enjoy wearing them is one thing but making someone wear them as punishment is unconscionable.  As long is there anyone that thinks of assigning heel wearing as punishment our community will never eliminate the idea that males wearing heels is a "negative" act.

[XtremeHeels]

I am happy to hear that you tried to make his negative experience a positive one! I hope he took your advice, is going to hold his head high and show that he is confident in those heels and make those frat guys see that this indeed was no punishment!!!!

[mlroseplant]

It seems to me that the punishment here was not so much being forced to wear heels, but to humiliate the young man, and in our culture one of the easiest ways to do that is to somehow imply that a male is somehow not masculine enough, and that being anything like a woman is just horrible. This attitude is what has to stop, and it is particularly rampant in my chosen field, construction. I wouldn't think that fraternities are much better than construction workers in that regard.

[Thighbootguy]

3 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

in our culture one of the easiest ways to do that is to somehow imply that a male is somehow not masculine enough, and that being anything like a woman is just horrible.

I wonder what would happen if that young man took @hh_pe's advice and got a pair of heels that fit, decided he really liked wearing them, and continued to do so.  I admit this is a far fetched notion but it might make for an interesting discussion in the frat house. I suspect he might be uninvited to join but would at least he would have the argument of, "Hey, it was your idea".

[pebblesf]

I try to remind myself that the negative comments are powered by the threat to masculinity, and a well hidden desire to wear heels by the guys who protest the loudest....