Steve63130

I wear a women's 12 also, in pumps, loafers, and boots but usually an 11 in clogs, sandals and slingbacks. I find great shoes at Naturalizer.com, Aerosoles.com, Easyspriit.com, Born.com, 6pm.com, dsw.com, and other online sites. I rarely find much in real stores, but occasionally I do. Good luck!

Steve

Any advice on my attire? The heels are sandals so my toes are slightly exposed. Do I wear hosiery or go barelegged under my pants?

There is no right or wrong answer. Do whatever you like. Consider both the appearance and health issues:

Hosiery gives perspiration a better chance of wicking away so your feet stay dry and happy. Hosiery protects against blisters, which will prevent you from wearing sandals and other shoes comfortably. If your toenails are ugly, misshapen, uncared for, or have fungus, wear hosiery to hide the flaws. People who don't have the "nylon gene" won't notice hosiery. Even black hose (with black or dark shoes) tends to be invisible. I wore black sheer pantyhose with denim capris and my black Naturalizer Tribute sandals the other day (photo below), and nobody seemed to notice or care. I wore the same capris and shoes yesterday with nude pantyhose and still no looks or comments.

On the other foot, if you wear sandals without hose, you can better show off a nice pedicure.

Whichever way you go, please shave your feet or epilate to remove any hair. Most people would find hairy feet in heeled sandals to be a rather gross look, and one that could elicit laughter. Look in the mirror before you go out in public.

Steve

Everyone has different tastes and most people have a preference for what they saw and liked in their formative years. But tastes can and do change over time. The important thing is to be tolerant of others. It's ok not to like a particular style, but remember that someone else might like it, and you will be offensive if you go "ewwww." It's always best to keep your opinions to yourself unless asked for them. This is especially true if you're married! LOL

Steve

Being out at night dressed in heels could be dangerous. If you're accosted, you can't run. If you're accosted by police, you're going to be asked embarrassing questions. My advice: don't do it.

A much better idea which has been mentioned here many times, although it sounds counterintuitive, is to go to a busy shopping mall. Go to one in another city if you must. You will find that almost all of the people you pass will be too busy with their own thoughts to pay any attention to you. You will have more anonymity in a busy mall than you will on any street at night, and the danger level is next to nothing. Plus long malls give you ample time for walking in heels, so it's much better than inside your home, where at best you might have 10 meters in a straight line. The big advantage of the mall is there are lots of shoe stores, so you can browse. When sales associates see you out in heels they will take you as a serious customer and give you better service. The big disadvantage: waxed, slippery floors, particularly if it's raining outside and people have wet shoes on. Be careful not to slip and fall, or if you fall, land on something soft!

Steve

Vector,

That's my point. While those posts may be boring and monotonous to some more experienced guys, they are very helpful to others, and fulfill a worthwhile purpose. So my message is that if you are a person who is bored with those posts, instead of leaving us, try telling us what YOU do to satisfy your heeling urges. Tell us of your adventures and encourage the new people who come here looking for inspiration and asking questions. If you've been down that road before, don't just lurk and gloss over their posts; answer questions, tell us what worked for you, post advice and photos. Add to the conversation in a constructive and instructive way! You'll feel better about yourself for helping others!

Mlroseplant,

It might not seem all that significant to you as an experienced heeler, but it can be HUGE to someone just starting out. Guys who want to get out there but are afraid of their own shadow or insecure because of their social conditioning need to see these posts from you and others! Thanks for doing your part.

Steve

I used to buy only for private wearing, but now it's just the other way around. If I can't see myself wearing a particular pair in public, then I don't buy them.

Steve

Wow, great story, mlroseplant! I like the similar outfits. You really rock those wedges and the short shorts! And your wife is stunning, too! Glad you had a good day with her! Thanks for sharing the story and I see a photography career for Mickey! Good job!

Steve

I had to travel last week and I stopped in Bluejay's territory for a night. We met up and went to a local mall to do a bit of shoe shopping. He wore a royal blue polo shirt, white pants which were short enough to show his ankles, and Uggs "Tawnie" wedge sandals (about a 5" heel and 1" platform). I had on 4" brown cone heeled Born sandals with 1/2 inch platform, bootcut denim jeans, and a yellow polo shirt. We were meeting with one of his "girlfriends" who manages several departments in JC Penney. Bluejay and she had made up to wear the same shoes, which she had bought some time ago when she saw his and fell in love with them. Bluejay had them in black also, and asked me if I wanted to wear the black ones, so I tried on the Uggs, even though wedges aren't really my thing, and I was amazed at how comfortable and easy they were to walk in (are you listening, JeffB?). So we strutted the length of the mall to Penney's where we met his gf and chatted for while, to Macy's, to Payless, and another store (whose name I forget). We went to Applebee's for supper and then returned to the mall later for some more walking. We had a great evening out, and although I didn't spend much time watching to see if we were watched, I really didn't notice anyone looking at us. We did have a nice encounter in JC Penney's shoe department. A 30-something woman was trying on wedge heels and trying to decide between two similar styles. I commented to her that they both looked great but that in my opinion, one looked slightly better. We enjoyed a conversation about shoes, and wedges in particular, and she obviously had no problem with guys in serious wedges. In the end she chose the other pair, but it was still a good choice - she couldn't go wrong with either. Bluejay's gf also introduced us to a new sales assistant who had no trouble with guys in heels.

All in all, it was a fun night out. Thanks for letting me wear your Uggs, Bluejay! And tell your gf hello for me, next time you see her.

Steve

BTBAIHeels,

Your statement is testimony that encourages us "old-timers" to stick around and help out the newbies. A lot of people get bored with the posts here after a while. "I went out in heels and nothing bad happened" posts are frequent and can be monotonous. Some of those folks tend to conclude there is nothing more that this forum can give them, and they unfortunately leave, never to be heard from again. To anyone here contemplating leaving because of boredom, I would say "Ask not what this forum can do for you. Ask what you can do for this forum!" I think some famous guy said something like that once about a country. My point is that anyone who gets something out of this forum, be it courage, fashion ideas, friends, or fun, owes something to the forum, and can repay that debt by sticking around and encouraging others!

Steve

Very good combination, Mr. X. I like it, too.

Steve

I would advocate the use of pantyhose, too, in order to even out the color variations that occur naturally in skin and give a smooth, more attractive overall appearance. It can be matte finish so it isn't too highly reflective (i.e., Hooter's girl) and sheer to waist so the panty doesn't show below the leg hem. If you do wear pantyhose, be sure to shave your legs first. I like those sandals a lot. Good overall look, in my opinion.

Steve

I understand that some women never wear heels and have no point of reference, so they can't comprehend what we do, but for those who do, why they pose questions to which they already know the answers makes little sense to me. What do you think?

Jeff,

You just posed a question yourself to which you already know the answer!  (Answer: we agree, it makes little sense to us, too!). So did you do that on purpose to see who would notice? If so, very clever!

Steve

What's up everyone I just bought these shoes.  Would like to hear you guys thoughts!!!

 

http://www.aliexpress.com/store/product/The-new-18-CM-high-heels-ladies-pumps-medium-heels-platform-6CM-high-heels-size-14/1125038_1911223581.html

OMG, don't fall off them or you'll kill yourself! And watch it through doorways! Be careful and enjoy wearing them.

Steve

Shafted,

Thanks for sticking around and offering your services to keep this forum family friendly and civil. Please continue. We need good people like you.

DWW,

Your attitude is understandable and like a lot of us, you have matured and reached the confidence level to which you once aspired, so the benefits to you of staying here are greatly diminished. But like I said in my post above, your experience has tremendous value, if you would be so good as to continue to check in here on a regular and frequent basis, so you can advise others who are not as far along in their journey as you are. Thanks for being there; your help is still needed.

Steve

In my opinion, those who have "graduated" and no longer need help from this forum should still continue to stay around and offer help and inspiration to newbies and others who are still engaged in battle with the demons in their heads. The same kind of behavior occurs in the legwear forum (tights, pantyhose, stockings) in which I participate (http://forums.delphiforums.com/legwearuf). People come and go, but some of us who have gained confidence stick around to motivate and help others. A few leave and come back, but most who leave don't, just like in this forum.

Note to anyone who has left here but has returned and happens to be reading this. Thank you for coming back. Please stay around and help others. It's a good way to pay back the high heel community for having helped you in the past.

Steve

Me, too! Way to go! Thanks for sharing.

Steve

Glad to hear your experience was so positive. You're quite a competent actor if you can display confidence outward when you're so nervous inside. I'm happy to know your friend was so approving! Thanks for sharing that with us.

Steve

ame="Steve63130" post="330947" timestamp="1403547414"]Well, rotate them 180 degrees before posting and all will be well. If I dont know which ones will be upside down until I upload them, how do I know which ones to turn upside down before uploading. Now you are becoming a pain in the arse. How do I know which ones to rotate upside down before uploading if I dont know they will be upside down until I upload it. Not all upload upside down. no thanks needed.

Whoa! Don't get your tights in a bunch! I was trying to be helpful and constructive so that your readers don't have to stand on their heads to see your photos properly. Look, you took the time to post good text and photos. Why make the reader go through extra gyrations to view the photos properly? Either learn how to use the phone so you take consistent photos and upload them properly, or if they come out upside down, use one of many free photo viewers to rotate them 180 degrees, save them, and edit your post to upload the rotated photos. The message you gave, which I'm sure you didn't intend, is that you don't care enough about your readers to do that. That detracts from the point of your post, which is otherwise very good. The devil is in the details.

Steve

Ok, if I can be exempt from counting, it will make life easier! LOL

Steve (down from the count!)

The colour combination is simple and effective, I really like it, and the style is great too.

 

As for the stares, don't you find that they are subtly different depending on what you're wearing? I know I sometimes over-dress a little (skirt a little too short and heels a little too high, but hey, it's fun to do that sometimes) and the stares can be a little mocking/disapproving, or people just assume the clothes/shoes are just a sex thing. But a more modest outfit, such as the long skirt and wedges you wore, tends to eliminate that perceived fetish element, and people still stare but in a different way, as if they can't quite get their heads around the fact that you might actually enjoy dressing that way simply for the pleasure and style of it. I think that challenges peoples prejudices more, they can't quite dismiss their confusion by laughing it off. Also, not all stares are bad, sometimes people stare in a way that says they'd like to say something nice but they've been caught off-guard. Do you feel that variety of stares in your experience too?

Well stated! Stares don't equate with disapproval. We are brought up in a culture that teaches us that there are two and only two genders and there is no spectrum in between (although that's finally starting to change). Men are to wear men's clothing and women are to wear women's clothing. So in our minds there are these two pigeonholes, and in an effort to make sense of what we observe, when we see a guy in men's clothing, that's the men's pigeonhole. When we see a gal in women's clothing, that's the women's pigeonhole. So what happens when we see a woman in men's clothing? Well, we've been conditioned to accept that, so that's really a third pigeonhole. But a man in women's clothing (tastefully done, let's assume)? There is no pigeonhole for that. No recollection of having seen that before. If the clothes looked goofy, with badly matched colors or a silly style (like a tutu for instance) or fake boobs, then the reaction might be laughter. But if the guy is well dressed, like Bluejay, JeffB and you, Sleekheels, then the reaction isn't laughter; it's trying to verify that the viewer is really seeing what he is seeing, and perhaps trying to understand why, since it's so rare. Most people really don't understand cross-dressing or sexual orientation, and often confuse the two, falsely assuming a guy in heels is gay. It's up to us to educate the unwashed masses by good example, and you guys are exemplary. My compliments!

Steve

Well, rotate them 180 degrees before posting and all will be well. Thanks!

Steve

I have trouble remembering 3. Can I just count to 2?

Steve

This is a very encouraging milestone in our progress as a civilization, which has for too long emphasized sameness and fitting into the pigeonhole determined by your sex instead of letting you decide where on the gender spectrum you prefer to be and what you want to wear, and more importantly, developing tolerance for your decision. The handwriting was on the wall 15 years ago when I started www.actisvkin.com and the trend has been gaining momentum ever since. Guys, we're just ahead of our time - pioneers, if you will (and remember, the pioneers were the ones with arrows in their backs!).

Steve

Cracked wheat! And his loaf wouldn't have two heel pieces, either.

Steve

Maybe you could learn to rotate the photos you post to make them right side up? Your readers would appreciate it and it's not difficult. Most programs that open photos have a way to do it. Please take the time to learn. Thanks.

Nice heels, by the way.

Steve