shoes that are feminine looking..good? bad?

[pumpedup]

So what about shoes that are feminine looking? Since us guys on here are into pumps and other women's shoes, does wearing a shoe that looks overly feminine go against the grain at all? Are there any guys here that want some masculinity in the style of their heels, or does it even matter? I am heterosexual, but I do love wearing an overly feminine looking shoe, like a pink one, or a purple one, or one with a bow on the vamp, or one with hearts, etc... Us guys know that it's a WOMAN'S shoe that we're into. We know it's not too masculine to wear them from the get go, but does the style, or the color, or anything about a shoe trigger a masculine or feminine feeling when wearing them? Does that make sense? I am just wondering what everyone here thinks, that's all..

[jmc]

You will get a lot of different views on this question because our members' views diverge quite a bit on this point. Some of us are of the opinion that anything we slip on our feet becomes a man's shoe simply due to the fact that a man is wearing it. Style and the manufacturer's original intended market does not matter. It is a healthy attitude for a heeler and a mark of a person who has developed a great deal of self-confidence regarding his appearance. Others do prefer a more subdued look so they seek out wedge and block heels because they are less obvious. (In all candor I must admit I am in this group.) Personally, I just like the way a heel feels under me. I am not out to "push the envelope" or "make a statement", I just like the physical and spiritual lift that heels give me. On HHplace you will find a great many discussions regarding the sound that heels make when one walks in them. Virtually all heelers love that sound but some of us do not wish to make that sound -- for various reasons that are connected to the questions you raise. Self-confidence is a big factor here too. As to the wearing of heels being "masculine" or "feminine", I'm not so sure that shoes have a gender. They are objects, thus they are neutral. A guy who steps out in stiletto pumps has a lot of guts to be sure and guts are often regarded as a masculine characteristic. (Which is also a misconception because there are plenty of courageous women on Planet Earth.) Sorry if this rambles a bit, you bring up some deep questions and collecting thoughts can take some time.

[keels]

I too love a feminine shoe. A low-fronted shoe with a heel is heaven for me. I also love the bright colours women's shoes are available in. The downside is that I would never wear a very feminine pair of shoes outdoors. I should say that I wear only women's shoes, I do not cross dress. I can get round that by wearing shoes of a more subdued colour and with a less extreme heel if I want to go street-walking. It is a shame that I feel the need to do this, but no way could I go out in a pair of pink heels.

[thedesigner]

The premis that "heels are womens only" is a load of bollox! I choose whatever i like on the basis of what looks nice and not becos it's masculine, and soulmate and I share heels anyway. I have block heels, wedges, stilettos because we happen to like them and choose for each other. It's all a matter of personal choice, like I do red but not pink, same as I do blue/black/brown nail polish but not pink/red - tho loads of us do. It's all expressing our personality thru fashion!!

[5150PLB1]

The Designer is absolutely right. What ever shoes that we think that looks good and feels good on us are the right shoes for us. The same should go for cloths and cosmetics. The very concepts of masculin and feminin are outdated and need to be discarded. If you think it looks good on you and you feel comfortable with it, Go For It!

[wood&metal]

For me, the feminine look (bows, hearts, some colors, style, ect.) does'nt do a thing... Nothing wrong with it, just is'nt my bag.. As for the female species, overly feminine shoes on a female really does'nt do anything for me either.. I find the simple and classic stuff to be more attractive..

[Guest]

I full agree with you 5150PLB1,the very concept of "masculin/feminine" is WAY out moded as far as fashion is concerned, it is only the vestiges of trying to SEPERATE the genders in EVERY way, & it seems to instill in the minds of the public the rule that there somehow MUST be seperation of the genders to maintain "stability" in society, for some unknown reason that I can not understand (for myself)

[Elegant]

Neither can I. For me, the "gender apartheid" [and I mean exactly THAT] is a toxic remnant of Victorian era, nothing more and nothing less than a prejudice. "Conservative" people will try to rationalise it somehow, create an ideology to live in an illusion of doing right. Just like racism, ageism, xenophobia, homophopia, prejudice against left-handed or disabled people...

[JeffB]

When I first started wearing heels in public, I was self-conscious about weaaring overtly feminine looking heels, so I opted for block heeled loafers until I built up my confidence. Not too long after that, I graduated to pumps which is pretty much all I wear these days, and pumps, particularly spike heeled pumps are just about as feminine a shoe one can wear, if you're into all those labels and such. I don't worry about labels, I simply wear what I like, if society can't handle that, then that's society's problem, not mine.

[WarrenB]

I usually wear a block heel shoe and no one seems to be bothered. What does bother me is that when a woman wears anything masculine, it's a social step up. Just look how women wear pants instead of dresses or skirts. When a man wears anything feminine, it's considered a step down in status, as if women are less valuable than men and men are loosing something.

[Guy N. Heels]

Neither can I. For me, the "gender apartheid" [and I mean exactly THAT] is a toxic remnant of Victorian era, nothing more and nothing less than a prejudice. "Conservative" people will try to rationalise it somehow, create an ideology to live in an illusion of doing right. Just like racism, ageism, xenophobia, homophopia, prejudice against left-handed or disabled people...

"Gender apartheid"? "Toxic remnant of Victorian era"? Well, I don't think I've ever heard it put in such strong language before. But I do get a resentment over women taking over every last vestiage of male dress without supposing there would be some sort of backlash. Today 9 out of 10 women are walking around in pants and (yuk) shorts. So why shouldn't I be able to wear skirts? If women are going to wear men's work clothes and work boots, why shouldn't I be able to dress-up in something that makes me look nice? Turnabout is fair play, is it not?

[johnieheel]

"Gender apartheid"? "Toxic remnant of Victorian era"? Well, I don't think I've ever heard it put in such strong language before. But I do get a resentment over women taking over every last vestiage of male dress without supposing there would be some sort of backlash. Today 9 out of 10 women are walking around in pants and (yuk) shorts. So why shouldn't I be able to wear skirts? If women are going to wear men's work clothes and work boots, why shouldn't I be able to dress-up in something that makes me look nice? Turnabout is fair play, is it not?

I totaly agree. It's been said time and time again that women have been wearing what ever they want for ever without anybody batting an eye. Now it's our turn!

Back to the subject. I don't do bows, flowers, or the real so called pretty shoes because I like to dress more masculine but I do very much like pretty on women. Thats just me. To each his own. I can except a man in a skirt, panty hose or what ever because I am one of those who look to the heart and not the clothes.

[thedesigner]

I agree, i dont do flowers or bows, but i do do diffrent colours, shapes. Whats feminine anyway.......... v subjective!!! Nail polish in masculine colours viz black navy dark brown , work that out!! Where do ear rings become feminine.... As johnie heel says above to paraphrase, be true to yourself, its not groundhog day!!

[Maximilian]

Wear whatever you like and feel comfortable with. Feminine, masculine, who cares? Show that you're comfortable walking in them and others wouldn't care. Even if they do, you'll have the confidence not to care about what they think.

Remember, you're the one with the balls that wears what he likes when he likes. They're the herd that are afraid of showing some uniqueness.

[Jamie001]

If that is the prevailing mentality of men, then I am happy to step-down and be more like a woman.

I usually wear a block heel shoe and no one seems to be bothered. What does bother me is that when a woman wears anything masculine, it's a social step up. Just look how women wear pants instead of dresses or skirts. When a man wears anything feminine, it's considered a step down in status, as if women are less valuable than men and men are loosing something.

[thedesigner]

I like to wear stuff so people do a double take and think what is that? ...... In that i dont do dresses/full on tv but i do like heels earrings nailpolish/light makeup. Soulmate luvs it too as she had a shit husband b4 who thought he was the dogs gonads cos he bein a "man" thought it was his liberty 2 beat the shit out of her daily. Now she has got a man who cares, takes an interest in her, who can share her interests and needs, and with whom she can talk about each other's feelings without fearing violence. Now hand on heart, how many women would prefer that option?

[Guest]

I think that you are so right jamie001, I've tried to figure it out, & the best answer is just the same as you just put it now, as if just being female is somehow "lower" in status than men, but as to what, I'm not ever sure how that is possible exept that its like the old thought of "the weaker sex!!??" which is STUPID, being that heels are supposed do DO somthing to the "woman" that wears them, but as to WHAT totallly escapes my logic since that a human foot really the very same no matter WHAT gender is putting "footwear" ON them!! oh yeah- you macho jerks out there, the so-called "weaker" sex aint so weak since WITHOUT them NONE of us would EVER be like- I dont know, what the hell is that word its something called BORN!!!!! which takes more STRIENGHT than any of US could be, bless our moms!

[jmc]

This "weaker sex" thing has always gotten me. Women are tough -- on the average they may not have the physical strength of men but their emotional reserve is amazing! Let's face it, they can put up with we men and that takes some serious grit and determination! The "weaker sex" thing comes from outmoded thinking, from the days when brawn was far more important than it is today. Back in the days when houses were hewn from logs felled with a double-bit axe and crops were raised from fields plowed with oxen, physical strength was important. But even in those days, women found plenty to keep them busy and any pioneer man considered a sturdy wife by his side to be a blessing. It strikes me that life is so much different today. We can actually spend significant time thinking about how high the back of one's foot is off the ground!

[johnieheel]

The "weaker vessel" Yes, back in the day men had to be strong and worked long hard hours in the fields but women also worked long hard hours in the garden,kitchen house and not to even imagine what kind of pain they go through to have a baby that NO man could bare. If you ask me, women have never been weak at all. Even today I have a job in a climate controlled area doing little to nothing all day and fight to stay awake at times where as my WIFE as of 7-7-07, works very hard making firemans uniforms all day and driving 60 miles to work where as I drive a leasure 3 miles through the country. We share in the cooking, house cleaning, and all that stuff as it should be and then we reward ourselves by going out on the weekend to see what kind of new heels have hit the racks and dinner. Women are not weak and have never been. My nickles worth.

[thedesigner]

I dont intend to be a weightlifter, road digger or lager lout. I enjoy saying who i am by the way i dress, and ENJOY people thinking "what the fk?" Theres plenty of people whose lifestyle is far more objectionable than mine, and people are v tolerant and ive found they enjoy people who are different and confident. Look at the stars of stage and screen..... they did not get where they are by being cardboard cutouts!!!

[Jamie001]

Who says that black and brown nail polish are masculine colors? I see women wearing these colors all of the time and therefore by that reasoning they can't be masculine colors. We need to drop this concept of masculine and feminine fashion because since it obviously doesn't apply to women, why should we keep this archaic concept and apply it to men? Wear what you want to wear! Don't let other people dictate what you should wear.

I agree, i dont do flowers or bows, but i do do diffrent colours, shapes. Whats feminine anyway.......... v subjective!!!

Nail polish in masculine colours viz black navy dark brown , work that out!!

Where do ear rings become feminine....

As johnie heel says above to paraphrase, be true to yourself, its not groundhog day!!

[thedesigner]

I understand what you're saying, its a personal opinion, same as yours. Believe me, people dont dictate to me what to wear! What I meant was brown blue black nails should be mainstream fashion for men.... Tonite soulmate and i are both doing matching brown nailpolish, fingers and toes...

[Jamie001]

Designer,

I agree that no one should ever dictate what to wear. The point that I was trying to make is that women wear "all colors" including brown and black and are not limited by these ridiculous concepts of color restriction based upon gender. Therefore, any color of nails should be mainstream fashion for men and women to wear. As long as we as men restrict ourselves to subsets of colors we will never obtain fashion freedom. Do you see my point?

I understand what you're saying, its a personal opinion, same as yours. Believe me, people dont dictate to me what to wear!

What I meant was brown blue black nails should be mainstream fashion for men....

Tonite soulmate and i are both doing matching brown nailpolish, fingers and toes...

[thedesigner]

we're both on the same side mate!

[HH_addicted]

Here's my 0.02: I like high heels... I mean real high heels (5" 6")... even pointed toe high heels that per se are feminine but I only wear black leather and I absolutly love any kind of lacing(Oxford style/boots .. in fact I only own pair of normal pumps and those are platforms I bought for balance training.. don't wear them anymore). So I like hh but the color and lacing is giving them a masculine touch... Looks like I am not that feminine at all But someone once said: There's one person in the world you have to get on with : yourself! (Maybe a not so much egoistic view on the world will do better.. but still if I don't like myself how can I like others?) So if you like it, why not? If others don't like it... gth

[Jamie001]

I apologize if I implied that were not on the same side.

Best Regards,

Jamie :-)

Fashion Freedom for Men!!

we're both on the same side mate!

[STREETWALKER]

I only do feminine heels. If the style and colour would look great on a lady, then they will look great on me! Feminine doesn't necessarily mean bows and stuff. I like my heels to be dainty. I have some baby pink suede peep toe courts, with the in-step side cut out, with glorious 41/2 inch stiletto heals. I guess the main issue is whether you go out in your heels or not. If you need to be discrete, then a wedge dark coloured boot would be prudent, but in private feminine only cuts it for me. I only do 4 inches and higher. Preferably 5 to 6 inches. My favourites are strappy stilletto and wedge sandals, or peep toe courts.

[pumpedup]

Like i said in my initial post, i love wearing pumps with bows, or ribbons, that are pink, or purple, or red, or a soft color that a female would wear. I am in the process of making some shoeplay videos and posting them to Youtube. I have one video where i am doing shoeplay over a pile of pumps spread out on the floor. It looks pretty spiffy! I wanna get some more pairs of pumps to add to the pile, probably this weekend. I also wanna get a 5" or 6" pair of pumps to add to the vid. The shoe i have recently fell in love with is the "Amber" pump by Two Lips Shoes. Here's a picture!

They have them in many colors, and i wanna three or four pair, at least! Here in Las Vegas, they opened up the Zappos shoe outlet, and they have a pair of them for $30.00 and they are pink!!

[chris100575]

It depends on where I'm wearing them. Round the house I love pointy toed stiletto boots which I consider to be feminine, but going out I stick to my new Rocks like the ones in my avatar, which are still pointy with spiky heels but with more aggression than femininity. I do quite like the thought of seriously feminine heels, but I much prefer wearing boots and what with all my clothes being black I'm a bit limited when it comes to colour matching! Chris

[benthere]

Good only if you're into wearing feminine apparel. If you're not, wear masculine-looking heels.