High Heels-- The Chick Magnet

[vector]

This year, for the first time, 5 of the top ten billboard hits were hip hop/rap songs. What that means is the majority of those songs are not bought by minorities (at least in the US), but by majority (or Caucasion) youths. Sadly, many of the non-positive messages are appealing to youth from across all backgrounds. "bad news sells better than good news" In the US, it seems the trashier it is, the more popular is (ex: talk shows, especially Jerry Springer)

[Dawn HH]

Vector:-) You couldn't get any trashier than Jerry Springer. Cheers--- Dawn HH

[JeffB]

Well, despite being a 46 year old African-American, I've NO desire to listen to rap. My thing when it comes to music is old school rock 'n' roll and pop from the 60's through the 80's. I'd rather listen to The Beatles, ABBA or Blondie than Kanye West, 50 Cent of Snoop Dogg. As for the gay/shoe angle, I work with an openly gay man, and he told me one morning that he wouldn't be caught dead wearing women's shoes no more than I'd be caught dead wearing wingtips.

[heelme]

Music is art for your ears. Like visual art, you won't please everyone every time. I like about any style of music to some extent or another. To me the "wrong" thing is to close your mind to something based on what it is, the type it is, rather than the content. On the topic Magickman brought us, I have concluded that females in general have fewer hangups than males. I'd wager there are probably men who have observed other men in heels and secretly desired to be doing the same or at least converse on the matter with the wearer. While women tend to be more outward with themselves and willing to walk up and talk to that same man in heels. High heels, shoes and boots are definitely a common thread with women while other men, though they may like the look, would not normally be so up front. Too bad, really.

[Bubba136]

JeffB....anyone that saw you wearing wing tips wouldn't automatically ever think you were gay (unless you were wearing a dress) while appearing in public wearing heels --- ala stigma of "crossdressing" -- automatically (stigmamatically ?) lables you as being devient and -- if you are a male displaying devient tendencies -- you must be "gay." (ie: automatic associated responses: sun rises, is must be "hot"....)

[Bubba136]

young people tend to parott and reflect things that are popular and get attention. Our society has been "Ghettoized" where manners are a mark of weakness and rudeness is a mark of strength. Trashy dress is an emark of being cool and dressing up in with taste, cleanliness, and care is considered "old fashion" and out of step with society today. I was taught by my parents to take my hat off when inside, in a restaurant and in church. I was taught to say, sir, mam, thank you, etc. Basic Common Courtesy. I still behave that way AND THAT IS THE WAY I TAUGHT/RAISED MY CHILDREN. Both of my daughters are married now and neither has a child out of wedlock.....according to today's accepted norms, WHERE HAVE I GONE WRONG? We all forget that our society has evolved over several millenniums and the rules that are in place are the result of lessons learned over this time period. You don't marry your 1st cousin, you don't have sexual relations with your daughter or your mother... and you obey laws established to protect individal ilfe and property.

[sscotty727]

JeffB....anyone that saw you wearing wing tips wouldn't automatically ever think you were gay (unless you were wearing a dress) while appearing in public wearing heels --- ala stigma of "crossdressing" -- automatically (stigmamatically ?) lables you as being devient and -- if you are a male displaying devient tendencies -- you must be "gay." (ie: automatic associated responses: sun rises, is must be "hot"....)

I think the rationaliztion that men wearing heels are gay probably goes something like....

1) Men wearing heels/clothing are wearing women's clothing

2) By wearing women's clothing they are exhibiting a women's personality

3) Women like men

4) Therefore any man wearing heels/clothing also like men

Conclution: Any man wearing heels/clothing MUST be gay.

[kneehighs]

Unfortunately, I think there are two thoughts we are battling here, not just one.

IF a man is wearing women's high heels, THEN he must be gay.

and the contrapositive form too:

IF a man is not gay, THEN he is not wearing women's high heels.

Be back here later on this.

[asdf174]

I would have to agree with you asdf. I myself being african american i understand where you are coming from. One problem that i see is with people like 50 cent, they don't live theat lifestyle anymore. They are always traveling or in the studio. First off 50 cent lives in connecticut no where near the ghetto. Second he doesn't drink or smoke so what does that tell you about the fools that believe what he is saying. If these thugs were a little smarter they would understand that these are lies and fabrication that they are putting on was but all they see is money, cars, clothes, and women. All they want to do is become rich and live the life they see on videos and movies. I hate the ignorance of these people that want to cry about the government holding them down but they don't want to do anything about getting themselves out. I know this is waay off topic but it had to be said. Ignorance is bliss. Please do not pigeon hole all the the likes of a few.

Yeah I forgot to point all that out. And how most of them just rent their "bling" for their music videos. It is kind of interesting how it is starting to be more about image then anything else for a lot of rappers.

asdf, I've no desire to listen to rap. At soon to be 50, I am way too old to change. I am still stuck on "Blondie."

That is cool nothing wrong with Blondie. I think Blondie rocks to be honest.(I like 80's music. Espisclly the New Wave bands.) Nothing wrong with not liking a genre of music either. With me it is country and some pop (mostly your stuffl ike Britney Spears, Christina etc...) All I was trying to say is that Rap isn't all "bling" and violence.

ASDF and sandlecrazy,

Having been in the military for the past 21 years, I totally agree with your observations to not automatically stereotype or categorize people. Being a white male, I tend to be the miority in the military and was really the minority when I was stationed in So Cal. But I have know white guys who were bigger a--holes and more degenerated then many african-american guys thet I have met in my carreer. Each nationality/ethnicity has them, and each of us need to take each person for what he or she is, and not jump to conclusions due to looks or projected appearances....

Wow that is what we talk about all the time here about "projected appearances", and that we are not all gay, but to many we may appear to be.... so if I am not gay, but wear kilts and heels, that may mean that an african american that has dreads and listens to hip-hop (skank or christian) may not be a bad guy either....

well off my soap box...

Thanks for letting an older military guy vent

tightlevisandhhboots

Exactly.

Asdf174:-)

Being an ex-teacher and one into music all of my life, I must commend you on your knowledge of rap and hip hop. There is no doubt in my mind that you will some day attain your goal to become a hip hop DJ. More power to you, my friend.

Cheers---

Dawn HH

Hey Dawn! Welcome back, glad to see that you are doing ok. Thank you for your compliments. I hope to someday attain my goal.

[sandalcrazy27]

As asdf is aware a lot of these rappers are "studio gangsters" all talk and no action. As you may have seen in the news about rappers getting into it with each other it is actually their entourage and not themselves. As was stated before, common, kanye, black eyed peas and sometime NAS put out intelligent songs that are supposed to make us think about our actions and perceptions of life in the world and especially this country and our own neighborhoods. DAWN HH Glad to see you are feeling better......keep up the healing as obviously i know you are missing those heel (tee hee)

[asdf174]

Unfortunately, I think there are two thoughts we are battling here, not just one.

IF a man is wearing women's high heels, THEN he must be gay.

and the contrapositive form too:

IF a man is not gay, THEN he is not wearing women's high heels.

Be back here later on this.

Yeah it is an interesting topic. I think people just steroptype gay people as being Feminine becasue they don't consider it "manish" so if your a guy who wears 6 inch pumps (like me in my rockin avatar ) you must be gay because what can be more non manish then a guy who wears women's clothing, and that is really more of a how society views thigns kinda thing. The bad thing is this is a really hard thing to change, the good thing is however societies views change a lot over the years and it will be a matter of time before this changes I think. I think the one thing you can really do is to try to brake the mold so to speak. By wearing your heels outside the house like Jeff for example or white_6_inch_spike_heel, and several other members of this fourm. But then that brings up a whole other set of issues with tollerence. I don't know like I said I think it is a intersing topic.

[sscotty727]

It's not just heels, etc. A while back when I first found this website and started publically wearing heels, my wife was more apprehensive about me wearing heels. Anyway, one evening INNOCENTLY I picked up a bracelet that she JUST took off and put it on just to see how it would look. All of a sudden she started in on me on "So are you a cross dresser now? Do you want a sex change? Are you sure your not closet gay? I don't want to be one of these women married for 20+ years and then all of a sudden be left alone because you go off and get a sex change! Tell me now while I am still young and can find someone else, etc." WOOOOOOO. I told her. First of all, heels are only a fashion thing and the bracelet was nothing than just wondering what it looked like, I didn't even wish to wear it. Anyway, there are nerves that get hit and women (and probably insecure men) really do view men wearing ANYTHING feminine as either 1) they are gay and/or 2) they want a sex change. Of course as posted in another thread here, she has calmed down ALOT and has pretty much come to accept me as me in heels. Scotty

[Bubba136]

Probably realized that you weren't any less of a man just because you liked to wear heels. It takes awhile. It took my wift about 10 years before she even started to feel comfortable around me when I was in heels. (that's a sotry for another time.)

[Dawn HH]

Sandalcrazy27:-) Thanks! I have been wearing my heeled boots around the house but I'm not strong enough to try wearing them outside yet. But I'll enjoy talking to all of you. Cheers--- Dawn HH

[canadianbeaver17]

It's not even heels that the women like...it's uniqueness! Saturday I went to a pub for a friend's birthday. I had on red flip flops with my jeans and black top. The chick's loved the look. Said the flip flops made the outfit.

[Dawn HH]

CB:-) The chicks liked your flip-flops probably because that is the footwear that most of the chicks are wearing these days and they don't know any better. Cheers--- Dawn HH

[flavio]

I have some opinion about it: - women tend to be more openminded than man; - men are forced to be vigorous since they are born, women don't; - women can wear anything a man wear, so, a man wearing theyr shoes or clothes will be nothing more than the oposite; - women should be curious about a man trying to walk in heels, something that they know is a bit difficult and sometimes painful. When I talked to my wife about my passion about heels and weared a pair of sandals in front of her for the first time, she looked curiously to me and observed how easily I could handle my heels and do anything at home with 'em. That's why I think women will aways be more receptive to us then a man.

[HeelD]

Well I don't know about all that, to me it sounds like that principal is what we call a good o'l fashion dumbass and those kids where idiots. And to me being a black person age 25 I kinda find it offensive that anyone would say those things represent balck culture and is harmless.... And what about rap music? I find that comment really offensive.(Because I'm leaning to be a hip hop dj.) Do you even listen to it? Ok yeah there are a lot of rappers who rap about negative things and that is just because that is all they know. When you are a kid in a poor neghboorhood and the first sign of success you EVER see is some drug dealer rolling on 20's with all the girls yeah that is going to have a lot of apeal and that is the case with a lot of them. But there are a lot of rappers who rap about positive things, and a lot of them are popular too Will Smith, Kanye West (nice little christian guy who has the number one single in hip hop right now and is a grammy winner)And alos had a BIG single last year called Jesus Walks, Common, Mos Deff., Outkast (another grammy winner last year), The Roots Jurrasic 5, Black Eye Peas (who latest singles have been music the whole family can listen to.), so there are lots of positive hip hop artist out there that are popular! as I said Kanye is one of the biggest and most postive names in hip hop right now. Keep in mind Hip Hop and rap music didn't even really start off as negative. That stuff came around with the ermerge of gangsta rap during the late 80's early 90's wicth is just a deffernt genre of rap. And is really the only genre of rap that gets that hardcore with all that stuff. You also got like crunk witch is just a high energy club style rap that just raps about haveing a good time. Though some Crunk does go into the violent stuff, but not a lot of it and its not nearly as hard as gangsta. People like the Lil Jon or the Ying Yang twins, Missy Elliot. I mean that was a close mind and offensive comment that is based on a sterotype. Sterotype that people assumes is the true face of hip-hop because they really know NOTHING about it. I mean if your listening to people like 50 cent, Emenim, Young Buck and thinking that is all rap is, then you need to listen to some deffernt albums. Because I know a lot of poeple who will tell you deffernt.

I agree with you here!

From another hip-hop head (that's me!), I hate it when hip-hop gets tarred under the same brush when someone like 50Cent or other fake bling MCs are in the limelight. That's only one tiny aspect of hip-hop. As you put it there are a lot of positive rappers out there. KanYe happens to be a favourite of mine as he raps about better things than money, cars and drugs. When does rap about those things it tends to be in a parody sense. Biggie Smalls was similar but he was more of a story teller that put a good movie like image into your head as you listen to him.

Other good MCs/acts include De La Soul, The Pharcyde, RJD2, Looptroop (Swedish act), Snoop Dogg (tends to be a lot more relaxed nowadays), Talib Kweli. I could go on!

Anyway, I love hip-hop as it's a great way to tell stories and messages. And have a good time too.

Also, I happen to like some hip-hop/street fashion. (I was in a store in Oxford on Saturday that specialises in urban wear). I can be smart sometimes. I have days when I want to wear heels and be smart, days when I want to wear trainers and days when I want to wear hip-hop styled clothes like stuff by Drunkn Munky and Triple Five Soul. I have a Triple Five Soul t-shirt (I bought on Saturday) that should work with some of my heels. Basically I'd like to be a fashion chameleon.

Kneehighs' fashion sense is smart yet has an urban edge to it (not hip-hop, but an urban style).

It's great to meet another hip-hop fan on this board. Shows heel wearers are from all backgrounds.

[Dawn HH]

Heel-D:-) You said it...heel wearers ARE from all walks of life and the members of this board show that. Cheers--- Dawn HH