The High Heeled Ruminations Of Melrose Plant

[Shyheels]

There are worse fates…

[mlroseplant]

I have no idea what is REALLY going on here, but I do know that if things don't pick up rather soon, it WILL be the death of this place. Even I am getting bored of it lately. Part of the problem is that I just don't have a lot of stories to tell. It has been kind of quiet being a guy in heels around here.

That being said, I was accosted twice in the last week, once positively, and once.  .  . errrrr.   .   . probably negatively, but it's unclear. The positive experience happened just yesterday, in which I was grocery shopping, and a woman approached me and wanted to know where I had gotten my shoes. Once again, I have to admit that I don't have a good picture of these shoes, my most worn pair to date, but I had to explain to this lady that I have had these shoes for over 10 years, and that they really weren't available anymore. Her stare and her questioning was quite disarming, and as we met again several times in the next few aisles I pretended not to see her. Yeah, that's right people--I wear my shoes for the attention.

My other experience in the past week I'm going to assume was negative. I happened to be in--wait for it--a grocery store at the time, and I was approached by an older man wearing bib overalls. I have to be careful when I describe somebody that way, because that could be me. At any rate, I had my face buried in my grocery list, which I make randomly, and has no relation to the layout of the actual supermarket, and this guy, without any introduction, asked me whether my shoes were comfortable. In the context at that moment, it seemed like the question was derisive, but I will never know for sure. Without looking up from my list, I told him that they were not really all that bad, which is true. He evidently did not want to engage me much, as he muttered something and walked away, never to be seen again. Once again, I do not have a good picture of me wearing what I was wearing, so I'll have to recycle a lame picture, but I wear these out and about quite often in the winter.

The first picture is of the shoes from the positive but creepy comment, and the second picture is of the shoes associated with the assumed negative comment. Again, these pictures are recycled. I'm not still wearing a mask out in public.

[Shyheels]

Both very odd interactions.

I certainly know what you mean about this place becoming a ghost forum. It has had its ups and downs, but this is awfully quiet and, as you say, awfully dull. It reminds me of the Heels 4 Men forum in its last days before it pretty much died altogether - nobody has posted there now in well over a year.

it’s kind of a downward spiral - one hesitates to invest the time and energy to post because there is so little interaction, and yet by not posting the place just becomes even more silent.

There really is, or could be, lots to say about the culture of high heels - the history, hypocrisy, the changing fashions, stereotypes, taboos, a whole range of social and cultural topics. But there is also a sense that if one went to the trouble to create a discussion-starting post the discussion would be along the lines of - yeah, true. Or, nah. And that would be that.

I really don’t know how one generates meaningful activity here. There are virtually no women posters at all and only a handful of active male posters. It’s a shame because this could be so much better than it is

[Jkrenzer]

I'm not too sure the second comment was derisive, at least not how you described it. It's possible he was muttering because you semi-dismissed him by not looking at him when answering. 

What seemed creepy about the lady's questioning?

[mlroseplant]

It may be that I am dramatizing things a bit for the sake of a good story, but only just a bit. I promise I am not making things up wholesale, Fox News style. It seems that there are a couple of clusters of three or four members each left this month, and if we don't reply to each other's stuff, there will be nobody left, unfortunately.

The thing with the Bib Man happened a week before I recounted it, so I no longer have a good sense of how that actually went down, but it seemed negative to me at the time, as he had been eyeing me at the meat counter for several minutes, and trying to appear as if he weren't. The lady at the other grocery store was not truly creepy, but her social distance was just a little too close for my taste, and her eyes did not waver from mine. It was not a conversation that I wanted to purposefully lengthen, let's put it that way. What I want to know is how come my wife always sees the interactions like the former, and never the ones like the latter?

[Jkrenzer]

You're right unfortunately about the serious reduction in participation in this site. 

You like me, seem to look in on the morning and comment if the urge prods you.

You, Cali, Spikes, Shyheels, and 3 or 4 others are pretty much all who routinely comment. 

[Shyheels]

Indeed! The numbers are really getting sparse.

As for the interaction, your immediate gut reaction is probably the corrective. If it felt negative or intrusive, it probably really was.  On the bright side, interactions that feel positive at the time probably really are positive too!

[Cali]

I think covid and staying at home dramatically reduced the number of interactions each of us have had with the "public."  Also the selection of high heels has decreased as well.

[Shyheels]

Surely though the site is - or should be - more than just a place to recount interactions with the public? 

[Cali]

I think there are less and less high heels being made.  And with there being less opportunity to wear heels (ie working from home) less heels are being bought.  I know I have spend months looking for sandals to replace some older sandals.  The JS's I just got is one of the very few that are high enough.

DSW use to be 20% sneakers, now they are 70% 

[Shyheels]

I think that’s true here too. We seem to be living in an age of almost puritanical tyranny where a humourless minority sets the tone in everything from fashion to politics. The frivolity and joie de vivre of high heels merits their profound disapproval and so we see this change in styles 

[Puffer]

10 hours ago, Shyheels said:

I think that’s true here too. We seem to be living in an age of almost puritanical tyranny where a humourless minority sets the tone in everything from fashion to politics. The frivolity and joie de vivre of high heels merits their profound disapproval and so we see this change in styles 

There is certainly a killjoy element around, often masked by 'woke' or other humourless/intolerant attitudes and reinforced by growing - sometimes draconian - regulatory restriction.   Indeed, I wonder whether we shall have any tangible/worthwhile freedoms in a decade or so.   But, contrary to that (and despite it - perhaps as a backlash), there seems to be a growing tendency of extremes of behaviour and self-expression.   Protests (however well-founded) are becoming more violent and disruptive and crime is not only increasing but also poorly policed.  High heels may be increasingly regarded as fetish-wear rather than everyday smart fashion, which is unfortunate, but I increasingly see (with 'profound disapproval', sometimes disgust) tattoos, piercings and extreme hairstyles that truly make me doubt people's perception of beauty and good taste.   

Perhaps the truth of it is that we have largely lost the will, and maybe also the ability, to act with restraint and consideration whilst retaining a sense of self-respect, humour and tolerance.   And I don't see that changing for the better.

[Shyheels]

I think a large part of this is a venomously enforced high church inquisition where heels are viewed as the tools of the white male patriarchy designed to hobble women and must be dispensed with forthwith.  No disagreement will be tolerated 

[mlroseplant]

Perhaps I am more optimistic than some of you, but I do not feel like I live in a draconian, humorless society. I am, however, living in a largely flat-heeled society. As far as people interacting with each other less and less, that was already happening. The pandemic merely accelerated the process. Naturally, my personal experience is different from many folks', as I work a job that cannot be done remotely, so I have to interact with people.

[Shyheels]

Cancel culture, “wokeness”, Twitter mobs, people lives ruined because of a post or comment they made a decade ago or more, virtually everything becoming contentious or determined to be problematic, novels being bowdlerised, Dr Seuss being banned … this is not a free spirited, happy, playful society we live in

[mlroseplant]

I have heard that all these terrible things are going on out there to ruin our fun. I haven't actually run into any of them yet, personally. They banned Dr. Seuss? I hadn't heard. I had heard that certain elephants had been in favor of, and in some cases had succeeded in, removing certain books from library shelves, but that's going a little far, don't you think?

[Jkrenzer]

I used to be an elephant but an orange faced baboon cured me of that problem. 

In N.C. undecided allows one to choose which primary you want to vote in. With a rule like that it's actually stupid to affiliate anyway.

[Shyheels]

Yes, believe it or not six Dr Seuss titles are no longer to be published, including And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street because of supposedly insensitive portrayals of other cultures eg: a Chinese character wearing a conical hat like millions of actual real life Chinese farmers really wear. 
 

Roald Dahl and Agatha Christie books are being cleaned of supposedly insensitive language - like referring to a character as “ugly” or “fat”

These are weird, weird times. I think some future generation is going to look back on this decade and wonder what kind of collective madness seized the West. One thinks of the Fall of Rome 

[Histiletto]

With all the troubles the world is having to deal with, people consider this time to be a kind of social depression by their perceptions. They see the inflation as being boundless and economically destroying the affordability of our basic essential needs. Due to the COVID pandemic, our friends and neighbors have learned to keep their distances. Our political leaders are showing they aren't worth the trust to serve us as they squander their time telling us how bad the other side is, while they haven't done any better. The world immigrants are treated with disrespect, even to the violations of their human rights as they are seen as parasites. 

The wearing of heels may seem to be in decline, because of these types of encompassing world outlooks. However the preferences and desires to wear them is strong and increasing because the purpose of our personally chosen adornments is to give us good feelings about ourselves and our appearance. So the potential of wearing high heels is very much intact and will return more than before, because people want to adorn their appearance with beautiful apparel.    

[Shyheels]

Yes I think heels denote frivolity and fun and a measure of escapism - something disliked by the inquisition, but which may well have a growing appeal to regular folk in these browbeaten times 

[mlroseplant]

On 4/26/2023 at 5:06 AM, Jkrenzer said:

I used to be an elephant but an orange faced baboon cured me of that problem. 

In N.C. undecided allows one to choose which primary you want to vote in. With a rule like that it's actually stupid to affiliate anyway.

I think I got autocorrected or something! I meant to say "elements," as in the Periodic Table of Elephants.

22 hours ago, Shyheels said:

Yes, believe it or not six Dr Seuss titles are no longer to be published, including And To Think That I Saw It On Mulberry Street because of supposedly insensitive portrayals of other cultures eg: a Chinese character wearing a conical hat like millions of actual real life Chinese farmers really wear. 
 

Roald Dahl and Agatha Christie books are being cleaned of supposedly insensitive language - like referring to a character as “ugly” or “fat”

These are weird, weird times. I think some future generation is going to look back on this decade and wonder what kind of collective madness seized the West. One thinks of the Fall of Rome 

Oh! Well that's rather different from being banned, isn't it?

[Shyheels]

Not really. When your publisher refuses to publish your books because of political pressure? How is that different from being banned?

[Jkrenzer]

31 minutes ago, mlroseplant said:

I think I got autocorrected or something! I meant to say "elements,"

That auto correct has a good sense of humor as I thought you were referring to a off base political party that has really lost its way.

[mlroseplant]

I suspect, though I don't know for sure, that this was a pretty easy decision for the Dr. Seuss Foundation, or whoever runs these things nowadays. After all, we're not talking about a cash cow like Green Eggs and Ham here. I mean, who has ever even heard of

[Shyheels]

Mulberry Street was one if his popular ones - the other five less so. Regardless the bullying tactics and political pressure to withdraw from publication books that had been out for decades, as well as the political pressure to bowdlerise Ronald Dahl and Agatha Christie, among others, is rather alarming.

[mlroseplant]

You realize, of course, that we're the only thing going on right now, and we're essentially talking about whether "Go Woke and Go Broke" is an accurate sentiment. Or maybe we haven't gotten there yet, but we will. After all, it's got to be better than just a plain horse and wagon on Mulberry Street.

I did see a woman in the grocery store the other day wearing red stiletto pumps with a pantsuit. Now there's something you don't see every day! At least not anymore.

[Shyheels]

That’s true - and red stiletto pumps is definitely not one of the caricatures on Mulberry Street!

As for Go Woke and Go Broke - it is definitely true down my end of the street. One of the big publications I have worked for as a freelance for many years is well down that road already 

[roundy]

It certainly is sad to see a decline in the wearing of heels. These days it is unusual to see anyone wearing anything other than trainers and that’s even crept (maybe exploded) into formal wear - bonkers! Dress codes are disappearing from events over here in the UK, Cheltenham race course as an example. You used to have to dress smartly to get in but that was scrapped this year and the only thing not allowed to be worn is football shirts 🙄.

I personally think it’s just laziness with people these days. Heels can be comfy, but arguably not as comfy as a pair of trainers. Society has at some point agreed that it’s okay to sacrifice standards for a small increase in comfort - their argument probably being function over form. I would argue however that the function of the footwear is to help maintain a smart standard of appearance and not just in a formal environment. Standards have slipped and that is the new normal.

I noticed Cali say that they are struggling to find the shoes that they could readily get a few years ago and the number of heels has decreased. I can’t really comment on this in the more ‘standard’ sizes, but as I am a UK 12, I don’t think I have ever seen so many heels for myself! Perhaps this is driven by the fact that these are as mentioned by puffer becoming regarded more as fetish wear?

[Puffer]

9 hours ago, roundy said:

It certainly is sad to see a decline in the wearing of heels. These days it is unusual to see anyone wearing anything other than trainers and that’s even crept (maybe exploded) into formal wear - bonkers! Dress codes are disappearing from events over here in the UK, Cheltenham race course as an example. You used to have to dress smartly to get in but that was scrapped this year and the only thing not allowed to be worn is football shirts 🙄.

I personally think it’s just laziness with people these days. Heels can be comfy, but arguably not as comfy as a pair of trainers. Society has at some point agreed that it’s okay to sacrifice standards for a small increase in comfort - their argument probably being function over form. I would argue however that the function of the footwear is to help maintain a smart standard of appearance and not just in a formal environment. Standards have slipped and that is the new normal.

I noticed Cali say that they are struggling to find the shoes that they could readily get a few years ago and the number of heels has decreased. I can’t really comment on this in the more ‘standard’ sizes, but as I am a UK 12, I don’t think I have ever seen so many heels for myself! Perhaps this is driven by the fact that these are as mentioned by puffer becoming regarded more as fetish wear?

I agree with you about lax dress codes and slipping standards.   Interestingly, however, my TV observations (particularly on the BBC, nationally or regionally) suggest that, even if a female presenter or newsreader is in fairly casual clothing (trousers; leggings; sweater etc), she is likely to be wearing courts or boots with a 3.5 - 4.5" heel, typically stiletto.   I doubt that this is a BBC dresscode requirement - and it clearly doesn't apply so much outside a studio - but it suggests to me that these women are at least conscious of making a smart impression and realise that a pair of classic courts (little or no chunkiness or platform) is a good way of achieving it.

I attach one example: Naga Munchetty on BBC Breakfast.   She occasionally wears trainers but is usually in stilettos.   Nice leather skirt too!

I agree too about the greater choice of footwear for those of us with big feet - I am a UK11/12.   ASOS in particular is recognising the demand, and the styles are not what I would call fetish wear.

[mlroseplant]

I haven't really noticed a shortage of heels, but then I am quite willing to go used/non-current. What I have noticed around here is that the younger girls do recognize the niceness of a heel, but they only wear them for the dressiest of occasions, and then only a handful of them think they've got the physicality to do it. Otherwise, they wear trainers with jeans that are half-ripped away. And that's in the winter.