Last Night In Heels.....

[hh_pe]

So tonight was the last night I am probably going to be able to wear heels freely around the house for some time. As you can see in the photo, our house is a mess. The reason is we are moving out of it and into the townhouse I've been working on for the last several months. My wife and I determined it was better to down size and get our finances back on solid ground. What complicates the issue is in the last two months, my mother-in-law has had a falling out with her husband and determined she would now live with us full time. Given the townhouse is smaller (house: 2,100 sqaure feet; townhouse: 1,300 sqaure feet) I can not take the chance wearing my heels at night. My wife does not want her mom finding me in heels, so to keep the peace, I've agreed to place them in the self storage unit we are renting. With some luck, I am hoping to purchase a bigger home in about 2 years. High on the list will be an in-law room that is on a sperate floor than the master bedroom. So for the near future, I'm going to have to "live" through the stories and photos the rest of you post on this forum.

[Histiletto]

Maybe an opportunity to discuss men wearing heels or something related, like personal freedoms and choices, will come around and you could have an interesting conversation. Your wife and you could plan to go on heeling activities. Good Luck, with this situation and I hope everyone will remember it as a time of happiness and joy.

[SF]

Bummer, hope thangs get worked out 4 ya. As for your mother-in-law, nice of the two of you to let her in, very accommodating. My mother-in-law knows that I wear heels, and has even seen me in them a few times. I have never asked her opinion, and don't wear heels around her much at all, but she has asked my wife why I wear heels. The wife says 'cause I enjoy it. Fortunately it hasn't been much of an issue. good luck... sf

[bluejay]

hh_pe, Sorry to hear about your dilemma. My mother-in-law knows that I like to wear heels. She has seen heels in my car and at my home. I have worn some more masculine looking styles in her presence, but not any real feminine styles. We have never discussed my heeling, together. My wife is ok with it and I don't know if she has discussed my heeling, with her mother, at least she has never said anything to me about it. Hope things work out for you. Happy Heeling, bluejay

[Steve63130]

hh_pe, Sorry to learn of your temporary setback. I hope you can plan some heeling adventures, or better yet, send your MIL on an extended Carnival cruise! (just kidding). Take care and do what you can to get some heeling in. Maybe some less femme styles will fill the bill until you can wear what you really want. Steve

[hh_pe]

Thanks for the kind words. Yes it is a temporary bummer, but the payoff should be worth it in the long run. I just keep dreaming of a bigger house with his and her walk-in closets. Both filled with heels. Gotta have dreams. My wife understands the stress her mother gives me, and what seems like on a daily bases, she is saying how lucky she is to have me as a husband. I keep saying back that it is I who are the lucky one to have her because she lets me explore various fetishes and she is willing to participate in them. We both realize the situation we are in can, and most likely will, put a strain on our marrage so we are keeping open minds and talking a lot more about everything. We are also making more time for "date nights" to get out. One bonus of having a full time live in mother in law is we have a full time baby sitter. Maybe one on of these "date nights", I might be able to sneak in some heeling.

[hh_pe]

I got lucky, sort of...... This past weekend, all of us (Wife, kids, mother-in-law) went out to diner at the Olive Garden. As we were getting ready to leave, my wife told me she found my Aerosoles Songbook flats while at the storage locker and wondered if I would like to wear them. As if she had to ask. Even though the shoes are not really high heels with a 1-1/4 inch heel, it was still great to wear them. I now have them in a shoe box in the shoe closet just waiting for the next time I can get them out. Still hoping for a moment to wear a higher heel, but it doesn't look like I will get a chance any time soon. My in-law's appear to be on the divorce path.

[gallux]

hh_pe, I share your difficulties, I did a purge some months ago when I moved in with my fiancée, now wife. I visit this forum everyday,reading stories, looking at some pictures of fellow heelers (I also left a few in my gallery to remember my shoes I so sadly had to toss away...) Who knows when I will be able to put on a pair again... I can't even share this with my wife as you did... so you can imagine. I wish this situation of yours gets dealt with soon and you are able to do what you want again... it is the worst sensation in the world to not being able to to what you want...

[Impala]

In my opinion, gallux, you should have talked about your heels with your wife before you got married. I'm not trying to bring your marriage down, but if you decide to tell her now, it might cause trouble or even break the relationship you two have. It'd be a pity. If you do decide to tell her, choose the right moment and be honest.

[Histiletto]

Ideally, the whole world should know about men having the abilities to initiate feminine desires within their personality, like the wearing of heels, frilly outfits, and etc., just as much as the world has stereotyped women. The visa versa is also true as women have been able to demonstrate their masculine traits. So many mis-understood sexual orientations and marriage conflicts could have been and will be avoided when this seemly trifle bit of human identity becomes common knowledge and mainstreamed back into the social attitude. It started when the homophobes of society began to stereotype genders according to the limited understanding of humanity of that time. In doing this, actual human identities became unacceptable if they differed from society's dictates. Guys displaying any feminine mannerisms and proclivities became the objects of social demerits and often harsh comedic scorn. Gals were also chastized at first for showing any masculine tendencies, but society's attitude changed and the homophobic template was disregarded as manly roles and appearances became goals within the women's movement for equality.

[hh_pe]

Gallux, I have to agree with Jorisken, telling your wife before you got married would have been wise. I too am not attempting to bring down your marrage. I hope you have a very happy and long one. I realize I am very lucky my wife is open to my heel wearing. I told her when we were dating in college about my desires and how I Iiked to see women wearing high heels. She set a few ground rules and I have had no problems living with them. The key for us has been honesty and constant, open communication. I hope you will have a moment in the future to be able to explain your heel wearing to your wife, and that she accepts it.

[gallux]

hh_pe and Jorisken, I really appreciate your advices. Yes, looks like I lost the opportunity, I did not think about this in our first years, and I really should have told her at that time. I had a few opportunities I wasted and I have them fresh in my mind. No doubt that if I have a new opportunity in the future, as tough as it may be for her, I will HAVE to tell her. It gets harder to suppress this feeling each day, and I am sure it will become something unbearable soon enough. hh_pe, sorry to "borrow" your post to express my feelings. It is really good to share this with someone like me, as I don't have people close to me that knows this secret. It is terrible to face some things alone in life.

[Steve63130]

That's why this support group is so important! We collectively offer the best advice we can to any and all who ask for it (and many times to those who don't! lol). I would never have even begun my journey into wearing heels in public if it had not been for all the inspiration I've received here. It's been extremely valuable to me, and lots of others. Steve

[bluejay]

Steve, you're right target again. Happy Heeling, bluejay

[hh_pe]

Gallux No problems on "borrowing" this post, as the others have said, we are all here to help each other. Feel free to continue using this post to express yourself, or start a new one. We will provide support anyway we can, as one comment from someone will spur an idea for an other.

[hh_pe]

This been about six months since we made the move. Our kids have settled in real well. Several of their classmates live in the complex so it always seams like a constant play date for them. The only consistent thing with my in-laws is their inconsistency. The wife and I were able to get away to Vegas for a few days at the end of July. I took my heels (Aerosols Prologue), but didn't wear them outside of the hotel room. Prior to going, I spoke with my wife about the idea of wearing them under my jeans while we went to a show. She was okay with the idea and even suggested we could go to one of the outlet malls and look for matching heels. However, once we got there, with the heat and thunderstorms, all we wanted to do was walk around in is shorts and sandals. We never made it to the outlet stores. Maybe next time.

[hh_pe]

So it has been one year since we moved out of our house. The townhouse feels like it is getting smaller by the day with growing kids. The good news is the strategy paid off financially. We are now in the position to purchase a home, about a year sooner than we planned. I'm sure if we stayed longer, we could do even better, but my mother in-law is still with us. It's just time. To celebrate the milestone, I wore my songbook's to work with shear nylons under my jeans. About 3/4 of the office was out today at a training seminar, so I took advantage of it and enjoyed a day of "low" heeling. Hopefully we will find a house soon, and one with a separate in-laws house in the back.

[Guest]

Glad to hear things are looking better.

[vector]

A few comments...

 

HiStiletto, I hear ya but think the conversation should be framed in terms of fashion.  Talk about feminine and masculine sides and eyes roll back into heads and folks begin to nod.  Frame it in terms of style, and people being free to wear what they want would be easier IMHO for people to hear and accept.

 

gallux, As a long time member of this board, I've read many stories of folks to shared their heel desire with their wives and girlfriends and often the wives would feel like there were other things being held secret.  Do a search and you'll find the ways it was shared.  That may help you.  I'm not married, but have shared it with girlfriends when I felt they had a good chance of becoming "very significant".  Fortunately, they all accepted it (to varying levels) and when we broke up, the shoes had nothing to do with it.  In the words of Dr. Ruth, "Good luck to you" when you finally decide to tell her.

 

hh_pe, best of luck to you with your house purchase.

[shrimper]

To gallux, as long as you're both alive it is never too late to tell your SO about your shoe preferences. As vector was saying, you can approach her discussing styles and maybe throw in a comment or two about what you would like to see on her, and by the way you wouldn't mind wearing them yourself. Just don't blurt it out to her as a "confession".

hh_pe, I searched the Aerosoles Songbooks and discovered they are not current, BUT on Zappos I found the Aerosoles Wish List which is a perfect stealth shoe.

[hh_pe]

Shrimper, I got my Songbooks about two years ago. My wife said Aerosoles rotates their shoes every so often. We both like Wish List. She said they would look good under both of our jeans. I also like the Accomplishment. The shoes look similar to a pair of men's dress shoes I have. hh_pe