Curt Posted October 28, 2012 Posted October 28, 2012 I was with my mother shopping at winners. A department store in canada. I was wearing platform boots that were pretty much covered by bell bottom jeans. Plats were popular in the mid 90s. A long leather coat, long blonde hair that I straightened with a flat iron. (I don't have those kelly ripa locks anymore, I wish!). We were at the checkout. The girl had to change the paper for the register, and said, sorry I'm taking so long ladies! Then realized I wasn't a girl! She said"I'm so sorry!". Stupid me, I said "it happens all the time!". Not really making my mom happy at this point. We were leaving the store. I said to my mom, that was funny, wasn't it! She said"that wasn't funny at all, you should be embarassed!". That was a story I've told a ton af people. I told my friend that we play in a rock band in. He said he got the same thing once. He was driving in buffalo with his dad. Got into a car accident, and the person in the other car said to his dad" you should teach that blonde broad to drive properly. Priceless. Clarissa.
Dr. Shoe Posted October 28, 2012 Posted October 28, 2012 Exactly the same thing happened when I was out with my mum in the early 90s... If only we knew then what we know now! LOL Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
Gudulitooo Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 Pumpcat, your profile says you are male while you sign "Clarissa" which sounds female to me (I have a hard time with deciding if a person is male or female by looking at his/her firstname). Could you help us ?
dww Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 Not so long ago a little boy about 6 years old asked me if I was a man or a women (must be my hair). And a few years ago a lady knocked on my door and asked if my mum or dad were in. I have been called miss in the past until that is I turn around and you get a nice sorry. life is not a rehearsal
Dr. Shoe Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 Pumpcat, your profile says you are male while you sign "Clarissa" which sounds female to me (I have a hard time with deciding if a person is male or female by looking at his/her firstname). Could you help us ? Haven't you ever heard of transgendered people, or are you taking the piss? Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
Curt Posted October 29, 2012 Author Posted October 29, 2012 Dr. Shoe, thanks for sticking up for me. To the person who insulted me, life is hard enough as it is! We belong to this because we want to accept each other! If you something personal to ask me, pm me. Anyway, why is there a gender in names, you people have figured out there is no gender in clothes, shoes, make-up, and so forth. Don't worry about me when you are too afraid to go out in the world and present yourself the way you want to. Life is so short, live it to the fullest.
Shafted Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 Anyway, why is there a gender in names In order to be able to assist in moderation of the girls forums. Shafted, the boots that is! View my gallery here http://www.hhplace.o...afteds-gallery/ or view my heeling thread here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/ - Pm me if you want fashion advice or just need someone to talk to.
Dr. Shoe Posted October 29, 2012 Posted October 29, 2012 Dr. Shoe, thanks for sticking up for me. To the person who insulted me, life is hard enough as it is! We belong to this because we want to accept each other! If you something personal to ask me, pm me. Anyway, why is there a gender in names, you people have figured out there is no gender in clothes, shoes, make-up, and so forth. Don't worry about me when you are too afraid to go out in the world and present yourself the way you want to. Life is so short, live it to the fullest. To be honest, I wasn't just sticking up for you but, speaking as a transexual, I was angry about his post too. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
dww Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 I see nothing wrong with the guys question, and I don't understand why you think you have been insulted. I am fully aware there are transgendered people around and the very best of luck to them, but it's not something that springs instantly to mind. life is not a rehearsal
ilikekicks Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 OK, cross the pond translation on this one please? Haven't you ever heard of transgendered people, or are you taking the piss? Is ' taking the piss ' comparable to ' talking trash ' or ' talking $hit ' or something like that? I honestly have NO CLUE and have never heard the term ' Taking the piss ' used before. Dr. Shoe, thanks for sticking up for me. To the person who insulted me, life is hard enough as it is! We belong to this because we want to accept each other! If you something personal to ask me, pm me. Anyway, why is there a gender in names, you people have figured out there is no gender in clothes, shoes, make-up, and so forth. Don't worry about me when you are too afraid to go out in the world and present yourself the way you want to. Life is so short, live it to the fullest. Some of us actually DO as you have stated. I believe I have presented myself quite truly to who I really am. I also wondered why you signed your posts with ' Clarissa ' while your profile states your male. I sincerely thought you might be a woman whom had a profile error or something when you registered to use this site. As far as I'm concerned, if your ' Transgendered ' ( I so hate that term! ), Your a woman. I see Dr. Shoe as a ' Woman ' and know 2 people whom have ' transitioned ' ( well.. one is done and the other is half way through the process ). The golden rule that I have seen on this site is Women post in the ' guys ' section and are encouraged to do so by most of the men. The Ladies section is specifically for them and for any guy posting there, you might get slapped by the Mods. Those seem to be the ' laws ' of the site and they seem to work just fine. To be honest, I wasn't just sticking up for you but, speaking as a transexual, I was angry about his post too. Quick question.. "Pumpcat, your profile says you are male while you sign "Clarissa" which sounds female to me (I have a hard time with deciding if a person is male or female by looking at his/her firstname). Could you help us ? " Your angry because someone asked someone for a simple answer/clarification? I dunno if there is any history of Gudulitooo causing trouble of any kind ( Im assuming there isnt as hes a user here still ) but I was a bit ' confused ' myself. As to the original topic : Pumpcat : I have been seen as/refered to as ' female ' all too many times. The few people here that have seen full pictures of me ( 6 months ago or older ) .. one actually stated I was lying and it was a picture of my wife-to-be or sister ( or something like that ). The story section here has some of my shopping adventures where I have been called ' Miss '. I once had a guy almost run me over in a mall parking lot. He thought I was a woman.. so did the cops whom arrived on the scene from the incident. I've made the same mistake with a few kids in my neighborhood. The ' Emo kids '.. the little guys whom wear more makeup then any of the women I know.. Its nothing to be embarrassed about is what I have learned to say to it. Usually when people find out they were wrong, THEY are embarrassed.. and me? Im still the same person I was before that moment. Just as you are/were before the person at that store put you in the ' ladies ' group. -Ilk REPEATEDLY ARGUMENTATIVE, INSULTING AND RUDE. BANNED FOR LIFE.
Gudulitooo Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Pumpcat, No harm intended. I read many of your posts and find them very interesting. Until now I thought you were sharing the identity "pumpcat" with your girlfriend, and I thought she decided to sign "Clarissa" to make clear when she was the one writing. I have seen this before. You see I was completely wrong. Now I understand thank you for the explanation. I understand very well you are a transgendered person and I have transgendered friends. Still, very few people sign their posts with a real firstname. I think my question comes from here. You see you present yourself, at least on this forum, as a female and ask why people are mistaknig you for a woman. Sorry, but this is weird. I think the answers you seek lie in this very question : Why is it Clarissa that asks this question, and not your male side ? After all, your male side is the one more concerned.
at9 Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 OK, cross the pond translation on this one please? Is ' taking the piss ' comparable to ' talking trash ' or ' talking $hit ' or something like that? I honestly have NO CLUE and have never heard the term ' Taking the piss ' used before. JFGI: http://en.wikipedia....Taking_the_piss PS: Mayor Bloomberg and Governor Cuomo were most definitely not taking the piss when they warned you guys about the storm. My best wishes to all those in its path. I've been trying to contact a friend who lives in Manhattan (E 29th and 2nd) but his phone and cellphone are both out. No internet either Probably no power.. He's probably fine but it would be good to know.
Rockpup Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Still, very few people sign their posts with a real firstname. I think my question comes from here. You see you present yourself, at least on this forum, as a female and ask why people are mistaknig you for a woman. Sorry, but this is weird. I think this is an honest question from a well meaning person. While you are now comfortable mentioning your transition here, you seem to have not mentioned it to your mother, or she would not have been upset. While in the middle ground between genders you may need to give people time to understand and accept. You've had your entire life to get used to where you are right now, family usually gets more time to adjust then strangers, but they are often the ones who are least willing to change their perception. *hug* (formerly known as "JimC")
Foxyheels Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 Dr. Shoe, on 29 October 2012 - 01:48 PM, said: Haven't you ever heard of transgendered people, or are you taking the piss? Is ' taking the piss ' comparable to ' talking trash ' or ' talking $hit ' or something like that? I honestly have NO CLUE and have never heard the term ' Taking the piss ' used before. The Wiki page posted pretty much nails it. I love the different ways we describe things here compared with the U.S. even though we have the same language. High heels are the shoes I choose to put on, respect my choice as I repect yours.
ilikekicks Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 JFGI: http://en.wikipedia....Taking_the_piss Thanks! I honestly had never heard that term used before. I laughed when I first read it then sort-of associated it with someone asking if someone was stoned drunk ( ' pissed ' ) as some in the UK might say. I really didnt know. PS: Mayor Bloomberg and Governor Cuomo were most definitely not taking the piss when they warned you guys about the storm. My best wishes to all those in its path. I've been trying to contact a friend who lives in Manhattan (E 29th and 2nd) but his phone and cellphone are both out. No internet either Probably no power.. He's probably fine but it would be good to know. Storm is far beyond me now. Eastern end of the state took a hit, My end ( fortunatly ) didnt. -Ilk REPEATEDLY ARGUMENTATIVE, INSULTING AND RUDE. BANNED FOR LIFE.
Curt Posted October 30, 2012 Author Posted October 30, 2012 I was mistaken as a woman 10 years ago. I feel inside I'm a woman and dress the part most of the time. Only time will tell if I go through the whole process. I posted my name as Clarissa because I don't want to hide what I really am to the nice people here. All my life I've never been happy in my skin. People from this site have showed me that I can live the life I want to live. I am a girl on the inside for the time being. Btw, I have the upmost respect for everybody here. Sorry if I was rude to any members. Clarissa.
Shafted Posted October 30, 2012 Posted October 30, 2012 May you find happiness in your own skin. I think we've shown you that many have found it here without going "all the way". Ask yourself where on the gender spectrum you feel you could live happily. The final step is FINAL. Shafted, the boots that is! View my gallery here http://www.hhplace.o...afteds-gallery/ or view my heeling thread here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/ - Pm me if you want fashion advice or just need someone to talk to.
Alexis Hill Posted October 31, 2012 Posted October 31, 2012 Even though I wasn't quite going for a full female look I got called ma'am which I think was a slip up but was happy to hear it nonetheless.
Gudulitooo Posted October 31, 2012 Posted October 31, 2012 Clarissa, I have another question : would you say you started feeling you're a woman inside because people have mistaken you for a woman ? Or maybe the reverse, people have mistaken you for a woman because you were feeling as a woman inside all the time ? Or, there is no link at all ? Another one for everybody : do you folks know if the person behind you when queuing at the supermarket is a guy or a woman without looking at him/her ? By the way, ILK, Rockpup, thank you for your support guys !
Curt Posted October 31, 2012 Author Posted October 31, 2012 To gugilitooo, I hope I spelled that right. I've felt like a woman inside my whole life. I might be afraid to go through the whole process though. The world is pretty cruel out there! Its hard enough wearing heels in everyday life. I might consider doing it when my parents pass on, they are old and probably won't understand. So right now I have live my life looking different on the outside with feeling totally different on the inside. But I can still wear heels, girl clothes, makeup and have a pretty hairstyle. Maybe that's enough to make me happy. It felt good when you referred to me as Clarissa! In a perfect world, I can go to bed and wake up the next morning as a girl. That's just how I feel. Anyway, this is probably putting a strain on this site. Its supposed to be a fashion website. I would be happy to answer anybodys questions and concerns or hear other peoples experiences in a private message. It means a lot that you people care and respect me for wanting to be myself. Clarissa. Btw, I won't be posting any more in the transgendered thread I stared because, it has nothing to do with heels. I will post somewhere down the line, if someone else starts a similar thread. Take care, guys.
Shafted Posted October 31, 2012 Posted October 31, 2012 Take care, guys. And to you, Clarissa. Shafted, the boots that is! View my gallery here http://www.hhplace.o...afteds-gallery/ or view my heeling thread here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/ - Pm me if you want fashion advice or just need someone to talk to.
dww Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 Clarissa, I only hope you find true happiness in your life whatever route you chose to take, all the very best for the future. life is not a rehearsal
Curt Posted November 1, 2012 Author Posted November 1, 2012 to everybody, thanks for all the kind words. You've made life just a little easier.
Rockpup Posted November 1, 2012 Posted November 1, 2012 No problem. Feel free to be open with who you feel you are here. Most people are more than accepting here. (formerly known as "JimC")
Mike Hinch Posted November 2, 2012 Posted November 2, 2012 Been mammed quite a few times but just like in my pictures I was not trying.
Puffer Posted November 3, 2012 Posted November 3, 2012 My goodness! What a lot of exchanges centring on a genuine question to establish why an apparent male was using an apparently female name. A curiosity at least - and capable of resulting in several different explanations. Situation now clarified and no offence intended or indeed taken by the 'target' - but definite discomfort felt by some third parties. As a general point, I am getting very tired of reading or hearing almost every day of yet another allegation of racial, sexual or other so-called 'abuse' centring on some name-calling or misinterpreted remark or gesture. Often, the issue only arises because an outsider muscles in, even though neither targeted nor implicated. Let us have a sense of proportion, please! When someone is physically attacked, or suffers some loss affecting his/her property, home, job or family, that is the time to take real and positive action. Meanwhile, the old age of 'sticks and stones' comes firmly to mind. (I realise that this posting is per se going to offend some of you out there. Tough: get over it - please!)
Curt Posted November 3, 2012 Author Posted November 3, 2012 Sorry for causing problems. Members don't deserve to be attacked by asking a simple question. I don't think evil on anyone here.
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