legs777777 Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I was out at my daughters concert tonite, my wife and the dragon, sorry mother in law was with us, and sitting beside me was a middle age woman, a stunner, green top and black leggings on, medium length blond hair with the sexiest pair of pirate boots on, black with a four inch heel. I think I was caught more than once having a sly look ( could'nt help myself ) however later at home recieved both barrels of the shotgun for getting caught. Currently in the dog house right now. Any one else have the same problem?
Heelster Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 Nope - -I can look all I want as long as I don't drool or touch. As for MIL - - She's never even made a sly face. Don't really care what she thinks.
iamduff Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 nope, my missus likes it, and goes as far as to point out heels that she thinks are hot.
yozz Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 My wife thinks that I would not be normal if I would not look. She will even point them out to me in the case I missed some very hot heels. Y. Raise your voice. Put on some heels.
CPB Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 Had a similar problem when my wife & I started going out, but we managed to sort it out. As Heelster says just as long as I don't drool or suffer from "the dropped jaw syndrome", I can look at the menu all I want. We've actually gotten to the point where she'll point out a good looking pair of heels if I don't see them. As for MIL, I didn't marry her, if she doesn't like it - too bad!
chris100575 Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 My fiancee doesn't mind me looking either. She knows it's just what guys do, and that in my case I'm quite often admiring the shoes rather than the wearer.
j.wexler Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 I can look all I want. I'm even allowed to have female drinkin' buddies but touching them is out of the question.
crossfire238 Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 Who hasn't been caught...but it still is great to look. MIL...mine wears some of the best heels out there!!
hhboots Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 My wife doesn't mind me looking at sexy shoes on another woman and often points out the better ones to me. I think as long as I don't get too carried away with the looking (don't blatantly stare, etc), its all good. I do usually sneak in a quick glance at the entire woman, I mean get real, but the legs and especially the shoes would be my focal point.
Mr.Friske Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 My wife has grown to expect me looking at other gals in heels, so no problems there. She even points out pairs that she sees to me in case I missed them. If I see a pair that I really like, I will often have her ask the gal in question where she got them.
roniheels Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 My female friend doesn't mind me looking at the high heels other women are wearing. She usually tells me if they would look good on me or not or if I have an outfit that would go good with them. Now, I have been caught staring at a pair of woman's high heels she was wearing. And she said to me, "...do you really like my shoes?" And I simply said to her, "Yes, I do. They are pretty and you look pretty wearing them." It was a positive outcome.
SleekHeels Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 It tends to be assumed that men look at women like pieces of meat, mentally undressing them... and maybe a lot of men are doing exactly that, so it's no surprise that women find it hard to believe that a guy can admire a woman in any other way, and feel like they're being cheated on. But then if you're checking out a woman and thinking "wow, I wonder how I'd look in those heels" then maybe it's more "mentally dressing" yourself rather than "mentally undressing" someone else, and perhaps partners who know about heeling and accept it don't feel so betrayed by that. Personally I resent the reaction that we face being ridiculed for wearing heels. I want to wear my heels with self-respect and to be respected (how crazy is that?), and that's taught me that there's nothing "immoral" about heels (for guys or girls), I'm not turning myself into a piece of meat by wearing them, and neither is a woman so I don't have to look at her like a piece of meat to find her attractive. I accept I'm probably in the minority on this one, but then maybe that's exactly why I want to wear heels, to signal that I'm not the typical guy who's going to look at women in a degrading way, and challenge the gender stereotype that all guys are just apes and that all women just have to accept that. If you like it, wear it.
legs777777 Posted March 24, 2011 Author Posted March 24, 2011 Hi all I would like to thank every one for their comments, every one seems to have their wives/partners on their side, lucky for you. My wife at the moment would rather poke my eyes out with a red hot poker, apparently I am not very disrete when I look, I thought I was. Opinions do vary I suppose. When I look my first thought is usually " my wife would look stunning in those heels, I wish she would wear something like that " I have in the past said that to her, but, she really doesnt appreciate those comments, she really doesnt like wearing heels, plus I still have some of the scars as a reminder not to say anything. Second, the devil in me thinks I would love a pair like that for myself. If any one has some constructive suggestions on the art of persuasion of my good lady, without the fear of the silent treatment for weeks on end, I would obviously be very grateful. For the time being I will need to carry on wishing and looking. Thanks all Legs777777
helexus Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 I was out at my daughters concert tonite, my wife and the dragon, sorry mother in law was with us, and sitting beside me was a middle age woman, a stunner, green top and black leggings on, medium length blond hair with the sexiest pair of pirate boots on, black with a four inch heel. I think I was caught more than once having a sly look ( could'nt help myself ) however later at home recieved both barrels of the shotgun for getting caught. Currently in the dog house right now. Any one else have the same problem? Nope never... Cause I never hide it and never will... Human nature to want to look at the things we find appealing. Wether it is a nice car, a nice scene, a hot chic, or sexy shoes on a shelf or hot chic... What is the problem? My wife and I agree it is never never NEVER a problem unless you are insecure about yourself. I think if she ever got upset with me for looking at things, people hot chics, what ever, that would be the time for her to move... I am not living like a tree for anyone. I guess to answer your question, yes... Been caught lots of times, but not worried about it... )
chris100575 Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 Hi all I would like to thank every one for their comments, every one seems to have their wives/partners on their side, lucky for you. My wife at the moment would rather poke my eyes out with a red hot poker, apparently I am not very disrete when I look, I thought I was. Opinions do vary I suppose. When I look my first thought is usually " my wife would look stunning in those heels, I wish she would wear something like that " I have in the past said that to her, but, she really doesnt appreciate those comments, she really doesnt like wearing heels, plus I still have some of the scars as a reminder not to say anything. Second, the devil in me thinks I would love a pair like that for myself. If any one has some constructive suggestions on the art of persuasion of my good lady, without the fear of the silent treatment for weeks on end, I would obviously be very grateful. For the time being I will need to carry on wishing and looking. Thanks all Legs777777 'Twas not always thus, my ex used to get very angry if she caught me looking at another woman, and because she didn't like my heels either claiming I was looking at the shoes wasn't a defence either. When you mention persuading your good lady, do you mean persuading her that you looking at another woman doesn't mean anything, or persuading her to wear heels? If it's the former, I think it's just something some women feel more strongly about than others. Nothing I could say to my ex stopped her from feeling betrayed if she saw me look at someone else. It it's the latter, good luck. If your wife doesn't like wearing heels, I don't think you can change her, and trying is probably going to make her unhappy. My fiancee isn't a heels girl either, she does have some nice shoes but never really wears anything higher than a 2.5" wedge. Having had a few nights out in 4" stilettos myself I can understand her reasons for not wearing them. Heels are not easy to wear in the real world, you have to really want to wear them to put up with the inconvenience and discomfort and some women just don't want to. Much as I love wearing heels, even I moved from wearing mine every time I went for a night out, to wearing them occasionally because it was just so much easier and more comfortable in flats.
b2please Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 Interesting thread. I believe my wife feels VERY secure that I really find her exciting and attractive after all these years- in fact possibly more excited than ever. So her feeling secure, and having lots of real experience to prove that I'm vey attracted to her, is a great foundation. Second, I love to people watch, and since I'm into heels now, I look at heels all the time! I suspect she may find this more normal behavior than me wanting to wear them out! so why would she give me a hard time for looking at interesting and attractive heels on others? I guess I could imagine someone being jealous, but it's not her style. Finally, if I'm really fascinated, I'll say, "Did you see THOSE heels?" And she'll casually look around, "Oh, the woman in black?" and we might comment a bit more about what caught my attention. My wife isn't the heels type, but she's recently been exploring higher and more sexy shoes, as my interest and admiration of heels has grown. But she's 90% 1.5" heels or less. She wore some amazing 4" ones at a party, and found them somewhat uncomfortable "those are for parties only" she concluded.
Guest Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 Yes and when I point out some nice shoes walking by, I get trust you to notice. She knows me well. I only get the elbow in the ribs when I should be listening (intently) but I often get a reply acknowledging the quality or height. Al
legs777777 Posted March 25, 2011 Author Posted March 25, 2011 Hi, for me its the latter, I would like it she would wear higher shoes more often, she always done before but now its few and far between. It makes it worse because I can wear five inch heels for a long time, and dont get sore feet, I wouldnt expect all the time, but just a little more often.
SleekHeels Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 If any one has some constructive suggestions on the art of persuasion of my good lady, without the fear of the silent treatment for weeks on end, I would obviously be very grateful. For the time being I will need to carry on wishing and looking. Is it possible that she might wear heels more if you encouraged her to wear them less? What I mean is, if she's thinking of wearing heels out (say, to dinner) but she's put off by having to walk any distance in them or have to carry an extra bag around so she can wear her flats and change into them... instead of saying "wear them! wear them! wear them!" maybe you could offer to carry her shoe-bag for her so she can wear her flats and change into heels later - basically anything you can do to actually make it easier for her to wear heels rather than just encourage her to put up with the difficulties. I'm clutching at straws, but maybe that'll give you some other ideas. If you like it, wear it.
legs777777 Posted March 30, 2011 Author Posted March 30, 2011 Thank you my friend, I'm currently working on that at the moment, unfortunatly she wont wear them at all now, trying to think of plan b now. Dont have any idea what that is yet but I will think of something. Thank you
chris100575 Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 If she's reached a point where she won't wear them at all I think plan B should be to let sleeping dogs lie, at least for a while.
SleekHeels Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Any ideas why she's gone off them so much, legs777777 ? When you said: I still have some of the scars as a reminder not to say anything. that kind of suggests there's some fierce sentiment behind that. If you like it, wear it.
Walkonit Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 "The view of the mountain scenery is very beautiful, but that dosn't mean I want to climb them." Your wife's resentment appears to stem from her negative ideas of what high heels represent. That could be many things and you probably have a better idea of this. Perhaps you need to build her confidence that you love her unconditionally. I'm such she is aware that you like high heels worn by her and by others (but possibly not by you). If you manage to build her confidence in your love she may choose to satisfy your wishes more often.
legs777777 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 Hi All To answer sleekheels, I have in the past when we go out and I know we wont be walking to far, I have asked if she would wear some thing high, sometimes yes some times no, but I was unaware my good lady disliked me asking so much, so now I dont ask and she wont wear them full stop. There starts the vicious circle here and no one wins, she wont bother with me I wont bother with her, by the way we are both very stubborn and neither will back down. She will comment about other people looking tarty with heels on, I dont help because I do look, and dont really hide it any more, when asked on this I look because you dont bother, blunt and honest. I do love her, I loved the things she used to do and wear, but kinda miss that now. Hope that answers some of the questions, replies. Thank you
Rob Posted April 2, 2011 Posted April 2, 2011 I do love her, I loved the things she used to do and wear, but kinda miss that now.My be it's worth having a heart to heart conversation, and telling her exactly that. Don't make it about the heels specifically, but that you "miss the things she used to do and wear". She may miss things about you. This is often the way relationships can go after a long amount of time when people stop making the effort. But there's nothing stopping you both agreeing to try and reset some aspects of your relationship back to the early days when things were fresh and new.
legs777777 Posted April 2, 2011 Author Posted April 2, 2011 Thank you. I have tried but unfortunatly this is where the stubborn side shown on both sides. But thank you anyway it is worth a try again.
SleekHeels Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 It sounds like you asking her to wear heels so much and admiring other women wearing heels has made her feel second-place to the shoes, and she sees them in a different light now. Surely she wants you to love her, not her shoes or other clothes. Perhaps you need to build her confidence that you love her unconditionally. Walkonit, I think you are so right about that... make her feel loved without any expectations beyond that, and even if she never rediscovers her heels again at least you'll have done something for the relationship to get out of the stubborn stalemate. If you like it, wear it.
legs777777 Posted April 3, 2011 Author Posted April 3, 2011 Thanks guys, much appreciated. Regards Legs777777
Heel-lovr Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 I loved the things she used to do and wear, but kinda miss that now. Hope that answers some of the questions, replies. Thank you I think I know what you mean. My lady and I have had some more serious issues to endure the past few years - no adultery or anything like that - but issues with ill family members, etc. And there's a sense of fun and excitement that seems elusive - including her wearing things I like - especially out in public.
Bigjon Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 I have been caught looking more then once and usually its not a big deal. My girl is 5-10 and as such she doesnt like to wear really tall heels out in public. But she doesnt mind to much if i look at other girls who do, as long as I make it up to her later on. She is understanding of my fetish and does the best she can to support me in it. I think something you are facing is that she thinks your more in love with the shoes then her and she doesnt feel sexy enough to wear them.
Recommended Posts