I put my heels away.

[frodo220]

All,

I had an epiphany recently and decided that I had to put away my heels for a while. Seriously I got tired of feeling "obligated" to look at my feet or legs in the mirror. It is weird, it is one thing when others notice it, it is another when one gets caught up in a almost constant desire to look at oneself in the mirror, or in reflections of window glass. A favorite funny song of mine came to mind about the issue for me:

http://www.themadmusicarchive.com/samples/m/e/Mel_Blanc_-_I_Love_Me_(I%27m_Wild_About_Myself).m3u

How many of you have pictures of yourself on your shelf? Or in an album?

To me, my wife's appearance in heels is much better than I would ever appear. I am content with that recognition. I would rather look at or remember her.

That to me is the crux of it, falling into a form of narcissism to deal with an issue like this is too far.

To each his own I guess.

Frodo

[Rockpup]

I think we all take time away from heels, or any other interest of ours, especially if we notice that the interest is taking a direction other then we'd like. Good luck to you, and I hope you soon can grab a pair of heels as just another pair of shoes, and enjoy the experience with your wife.

[Bad_Robot]

Best Wishes sorting the issues that are troubling you I hope that you find the answer and maybe return one day in the future when it feels right to do so...sometimes its a good idea to take some "time out " and get things into perspective. Take Care

[frodo220]

Why do you assume I have "issues" that led to this decision? It was a change of mind, because I realized it was a path I did not want to "travel on" for now. Psychoanalyzing people about this stuff is absurd. Frodo

[kikepa]

Good for you, Frodo!

[SandalFan]

That to me is the crux of it, falling into a form of narcissism to deal with an issue like this is too far.

One thing that might help is to find a pair of men's shoes or boots that you can really enjoy wearing every day, and reserve your heels for special occasions.

I used to own a pair of slouch boots. I loved them so much that I wore them constantly, and eventually wore out the soles. Unfortunately, the catalogue I ordered them from (International Male) has since discontinued them, so I've been relegated to wearing biker boots and hiking boots for the last several years. They're comfortable, but nowhere near as fun to wear as the 4" stiletto ankle boots I bought last Fall. But as much fun as those are, there are days when I am in no mood to wear them.

A few weeks ago, I decided to see if anyone still makes slouch boots for men, and found these. Suffice it to say, I couldn't believe my luck. I immediately ordered a pair, and have worn them every day since. They look and feel absolutely fantastic! I was even able to transfer the straps from my old pair to these.

Now I don't care what I put on my feet. Whether I'm wearing my new slouch boots, or my ankle boots, I feel great either way!

[frodo220]

I understand your position and I agree with it. The only shoes I anticipate wearing in the fall again are the boots (4 inch heels) I got. As I mentioned on this forum a few months ago, was I had two pairs of light formfitting ankle boots (for me) that had a 2-3 inch heel back in the 1970s. I really liked wearing them and they were designed for "men". But that style quickly went out of fashion and the best one can do for men's boots is the one's like the slouch boots you got. I have found other pairs like it but they cost double or more of the price for those boots. But, they only have a 2 inch heel or so. But, where I live in North Carolina, it is way too hot now to wear boots, and the sandals/pumps I got have the "problem" of being uncomfortable in hot weather or annoying because I end up looking in the mirror too often. I may wear the others now and then, but to do it often seems rather absurd even silly. Because also in some respects a lot of the "thrill" is gone when I got to the level I was "happy" with, and I realized that kind of "thrill" often leads to a path towards more and more absurd footwear or lifestyle to remain it being "fun". At my age, that kind of "fun" I recognize now is more a selfdestructive kind and will result in me becoming some sort of charicature or a man people are more inclined to laugh at or pity. It is kindof like someone being introduced to porn with Playboy, and then "needing" Penthouse for the same thrill and then that wears off, and then one gets "into" Hustler and often much worse. Destructive to men who ogle, and the women who willfully debase themselves. Who really enjoys watching a train wreck when oneself and others get severely hurt. Wisdom means stopping when one is on a road like that, and getting off of it, and deciding to seek contentment elsewhere with more edifying things, for oneself and others who may notice you in day to day life. Frodo

[Saturn]

Just don't get rid of your heels. Keep 'em in a box or something. There are too many stories of people on here who were "getting out of it" and then regretted getting rid of their shoes. I have a feeling that you might take them out again. Either way, being happy is the only thing that's important.

[frodo220]

I put them away in a rarely used cubbie above one of my closets.

[dww]

I have tried to put heels away, but after a couple of months I have to wear some, could be for five minutes, but I have to do it, bit like a drug I suppose. Know one thing I can never give heels up, I think I was born with it.

[Celso999]

Because also in some respects a lot of the "thrill" is gone when I got to the level I was "happy" with, and I realized that kind of "thrill" often leads to a path towards more and more absurd footwear or lifestyle to remain it being "fun". At my age, that kind of "fun" I recognize now is more a selfdestructive kind and will result in me becoming some sort of charicature or a man people are more inclined to laugh at or pity.

Hi Frodo,

Reading your post, it reminded me that I recently discovered the term "autogynephilia" which means "love of oneself as a woman" in order to refer to "a man's paraphilic tendency to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of himself as an woman." In my case, it describes exactly the reason for me wearing women's shoes and, like you said, the constant desire to look at mirrors. Maybe checking this out will help to give you some insight as it did for me.

Best Regards,

Celso.

[frodo220]

Hi Frodo,

Reading your post, it reminded me that I recently discovered the term "autogynephilia" which means "love of oneself as a woman" in order to refer to "a man's paraphilic tendency to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of himself as an woman." In my case, it describes exactly the reason for me wearing women's shoes and, like you said, the constant desire to look at mirrors. Maybe checking this out will help to give you some insight as it did for me.

Best Regards,

Celso.

Hardly, I am a man, and I am very glad I am one. I have no desire to be a woman, nor do I want to look like one when I go out. AS people will either be annoyed, bothered or enticed by it, and mostly I would rather be "left alone". I grew up in a family where my mother (and my sisters) after her were emasculating because of an intense hatred, and even envy of men (those aspects are connected) (penis envy), and so I learned to cope by turning myself off in certain ways to get "left alone" by them. I learned to act certain ways to not be "threatening" or "male like", but I reserved for myself a thankful heart that I was not as they were. I had wished when I was very young, that if perhaps I was a girl, I would be more "accepted", "praised" even treated kindly. But, now I realize that they were the ones perverted by their own problems in not accepting me for who I was.

Unfortunately many guys wear heels or cross dress out in public as a way to have a power trip, to either annoy or entice (to draw attention to themselves). Some guys want to even jerk around some troubled guys by "getting" some sort of homosexual/sexual reaction from a guy or two, because it is evident to any guy, he is looking at a strange "something". Or some homosexual reaction from a lesbian for the same reasons. When most people from trouble backgrounds might have some sort of sexual confusion, because of the mess they grew up in. Both reactions come because of the pretense, the image someone puts in another's head.

The term you describe is a label in the Psychiatric manual that labels transsexuals, for those that truly wish they were female. I do NOT. For me it is the irony which is more satisfying, even though some may think I might be effeminate (as they define the term) in some way, if they knew what I might like to wear in private. If they (or I) do it in private it is more personal and often may be just "comforting" somehow. Like the fact what I wear does NOT change the FACT I am a man is comforting to me. I have a sister who called me a "latent" homosexual when I was in my early 20s, and as a teenager, because ever since I was a kid I was convinced that I only wanted to be sexually intimate with my wife and only in the context of marriage. She considered that as some sort of "effeminate" characteristic because I was not bedding over a hundred girls like my older brother. Now, I see clearly the perverted nature of it all. Where chastity for a guy is considered a threat to some women, as if chastity was some sort of character flaw. Even for my wife, she never seemed to realize the best part of intimacy for me, was afterwards going to sleep holding her hand. After 5 years of so of our marriage she got more and more angry because I would not "cooperate" and become more "macho" for her somehow. Like, at the beginning she thought she could fix me and make me more "manlike", and I did not "cooperate" with her plan and decided to go after other guys who she could manipulate.

I wear heels out subtly where I would only get noticed by "nitpickers" who delight in playing critic and staring at others for some sort of gratification they have. And I frankly do not give a damn what they think. Most normal people would only notice I am taller than "normal", and would not bother looking at my feet. In private I like to now and then wear heels, hose, often a skirt and sometimes a dress, because it is oddly comforting, the IRONY makes it so. I am wearing something that appears one way, and yet I am a MAN, and can stand up to pee.

My reasons for my sharing all these personal details is to show how personally complicated it is, and I cannot be labeled or "caricatured" as a "autogynephilia" person http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autogynephilia , in some respects I was forced by circumstances to be more a hermephrodite in my head, female "like" in some contexts, and definitely male in others. But, physically I am glad I am MALE sexually, and even once when my sister got in a tizzy trying to get my goat, I said something like this: "I will listen to you when you grow some balls, until then get out of my face you castrating bitch". How many guys out there will really call an emasculating female what she really is? A castrating bitch with a severe case of penis envy. Most guys are unfortunately afraid of the women in their life, because they would rather not be toyed with.

Unfortunately some guys instead of telling it like it is, and confronting that woman directly get angrily macho with her or others (even "abusive"), or turn that anger inwards to "feel better" by getting drunk or stoned. When men should often just stand up and say as I did. "When you grow some balls, then I will listen to you!", when they try and guide my personal life!. Older gentle men are really the only people who can help younger men grow up to be honorable, gentlemen. Most women presume to think they can guide any man to be a better one. That is their arrogance and one reason I am VERY glad I am NOT a woman.

You do guys a great disservice where you play a psychoanalyst for guys you really do not know.

Frodo

[Tech]

Unfortunately many guys wear heels or cross dress out in public as a way to have a power trip, to either annoy or entice (to draw attention to themselves). Some guys want to even jerk around some troubled guys by "getting" some sort of homosexual/sexual reaction from a guy or two, because it is evident to any guy, he is looking at a strange "something". Or some homosexual reaction from a lesbian for the same reasons. When most people from trouble backgrounds might have some sort of sexual confusion, because of the mess they grew up in. Both reactions come because of the pretense, the image someone puts in another's head.

You do guys a great disservice where you play a psychoanalyst for guys you really do not know.

Frodo

Froddo

You got some sort of "anger management" problems?

Why do you always feel the need to turn things into some angry "I know everything about everybody and all guys want is to piss of others" kind of rant?

All you seem to do is rant about how any guy who wears heels does it to provoc reactions, thus it seems, you havent read anything that goes on here have you?

Enough with the grey clouds already man, we all got enough crap to deal with already...

[vassies]

well i wear boots and dress how i like for me,not to piss anyone off or provoke a reaction. if somebody doesnt like it thats their problem not mine. i am a straight guy who wears shoes,boots and clothes i feel comfortable in. i am sure most guys on here are the same

[Bubba136]

I believe that if I were reacting to all of the issues that you, Frodo, outlined, I would be really confused to a point that I would seek some professional assistance because no one really needs to live their life in such a miserable state. I actually believe that you would be very happy once you get all this sorted out and put behind you.

[Celso999]

The term you describe is a label in the Psychiatric manual that labels transsexuals, for those that truly wish they were female.

Hi Frodo,

Sorry to disagree with you but the great majority of the transexuals feel they are a woman trapped in a man's body and most disagree they are autogynephilic.

The wikipedia says:

According to Blanchard, "An autogynephile does not necessarily become sexually aroused every time he pictures himself as female or engages in feminine behavior, any more than a heterosexual man automatically gets an erections whenever he sees an attractive woman. Thus, the concept of autogynephilia...refers to a potential for sexual excitation".

Blanchard classified four subtypes of autogynephilic sexual fantasies:

1) Transvestic autogynephilia: arousal to the act or fantasy of wearing women's clothing

2) Behavioral autogynephilia: arousal to the act or fantasy of doing something regarded as feminine

3) Physiologic autogynephilia: arousal to fantasies of female-specific body functions

4) Anatomic autogynephilia: arousal to the fantasy of having a woman's body, or parts of one.

As we can see, it's only about "fantasies", not about a REAL desire to be a woman.

By the way, I never tried to "play a psychoanalyst" over you. I just said that my research about "autogynephilia" has helped me understanding MY motivations. I thought that MAYBE you would like to read about it.

Anyway, I liked your answer a lot.

Best Regards,

Celso.

[Shoeboi]

BUBBA I totally agree. There are just way to many hang ups about shoes. For GOD SAKES! It's just fashion people. Relax, chill out and if it dosen't effect your life. WHO CARES! I guess some people just need something to bitch about.

[frodo220]

I believe that if I were reacting to all of the issues that you, Frodo, outlined, I would be really confused to a point that I would seek some professional assistance because no one really needs to live their life in such a miserable state. I actually believe that you would be very happy once you get all this sorted out and put behind you.

More psychoanalyzing. What a load of crap. The whole purposes of my posts is to challenge guys to think about why they are really doing something. Anybody else notice I have not been recommending to anyone here that they need psychological help, and yet some guys do it to me. What hypocrisy! It seems like some guys protesteth too much.

Frodo

[frodo220]

Hi Frodo,

Sorry to disagree with you but the great majority of the transexuals feel they are a woman trapped in a man's body and most disagree they are autogynephilic.

The wikipedia says:

According to Blanchard, "An autogynephile does not necessarily become sexually aroused every time he pictures himself as female or engages in feminine behavior, any more than a heterosexual man automatically gets an erections whenever he sees an attractive woman. Thus, the concept of autogynephilia...refers to a potential for sexual excitation".

Blanchard classified four subtypes of autogynephilic sexual fantasies:

1) Transvestic autogynephilia: arousal to the act or fantasy of wearing women's clothing

2) Behavioral autogynephilia: arousal to the act or fantasy of doing something regarded as feminine

3) Physiologic autogynephilia: arousal to fantasies of female-specific body functions

4) Anatomic autogynephilia: arousal to the fantasy of having a woman's body, or parts of one.

As we can see, it's only about "fantasies", not about a REAL desire to be a woman.

By the way, I never tried to "play a psychoanalyst" over you. I just said that my research about "autogynephilia" has helped me understanding MY motivations. I thought that MAYBE you would like to read about it.

Anyway, I liked your answer a lot.

Best Regards,

Celso.

My main point is that labeling ANY guy for such things is WRONG. No one here can read anybody's minds, or diagnose TRUE motivations. It is a stupid exercise.

If a label helps you understand yourself, that is fine. I have a condition called Aspergers Syndrome, and my life does illustrate some aspects of that label, and some aspects do not exist in my case. Yet I realize that is just a label to categorize some people, and is NOT very helpful to cure anyone, when Aspergers is NOT a disease but a way some people communicate with the world.

Frodo

[FXHH]

I have tried to put heels away, but after a couple of months I have to wear some, could be for five minutes, but I have to do it, bit like a drug I suppose.

Know one thing I can never give heels up, I think I was born with it.

could not of put it better myself!!

been down that road!!

have now learned that its a part of me, so I now make the best of it and enjoy it!!

hopping to take the next step of public heeling soon!!

[frodo220]

Froddo

You got some sort of "anger management" problems?

Why do you always feel the need to turn things into some angry "I know everything about everybody and all guys want is to piss of others" kind of rant?

All you seem to do is rant about how any guy who wears heels does it to provoc reactions, thus it seems, you havent read anything that goes on here have you?

Enough with the grey clouds already man, we all got enough crap to deal with already...

There you go psychoanalyzing me and my "anger management" issues.

Thanks for proving my point. Individual guys are unique by definition and unless one is honest enough to see clearly that guys who wear clothes made for women might do it for all sorts of reasons.

I got personal about my own situation, because those experiences is what makes me me. I have a right to be angry about the child abuse I suffered, as that kind of abuse goes on even now with many boys growing up. Me being angered does not mean I take it personally anymore. It just makes me want to publicize the problem and work to protect other kids who may be suffering what I was years ago, through no fault of my own.

If I was molested as a child, it would be correct for me to take that righteous anger that I as an adult might have to prosecute or stop others who are doing it now. Too bad many guys are essentially cowards and not standing up and saying the abuse of kids is WRONG and should be condemned, even prosecuted. Too many guys hide and claim ignorance because it does not "concern them" but concerns "strangers". This is how child abusers get away with it.

Yes, I do have an issue with those here who use their dressup to shock or manipulate, jerk people around. It is clearly a powertrip and WRONG. I do not have an issue with those here who use heels subtly in public, or perhaps a skirt outside, that would not be normally noticed by anyone or provoke a reaction.

Frodo

[radiodave]

No one here can read anybody's minds, or diagnose TRUE motivations.

Frodo

It seems like some guys protesteth too much.

Frodo

ROFLMAO!

Thank you Frodo, for providing me with a good laugh today. Priceless!

[frodo220]

ROFLMAO!

Thank you Frodo, for providing me with a good laugh today. Priceless!

Glad you got the point.

But, seriously one of the things that got me steamed about this issue, is seeing on Webshots.com and Flickr pictures of "crossdressers" who involve their sons in their antics, and take pictures of them and post them online. Their little boys have no real say, and their Dad (or Mom) forcing them to do it, even urging them to do so, is WRONG. I had it bad when I was a little boy and my mom made fun of my small penis, used me as a sewing model to hem her clothing, and commented on how she and my sisters envied my fingernails, eyelashes, and objected to me acting like a little boy or as a teenage boy because of her hostility at my father and other men in her past.

Anyone that push it on their children, like these online sites and then post the pictures online is WORSE. As child molesters can download the pictures and fantasize about those poor kids.

Some guys here act like there are no evil guys out there who do this for very BAD reasons. Or they trumpet rubbing their attire in the faces of strangers to get a "reaction", ever see pictures of drag balls? I think those who do both need to get their heads out of the sand, and realize that behavior in public does affect other people.

At least I am willing to admit that extremes exist and every guy needs to be introspective about why they make the choices they do, and how those choices WILL affect others or young family members.

My sons, being 21 and 23, living over 500 miles a way each, are not aware of my "attire" choices, nor should they be, because they grew up with a Dad who loved them and was proud of BEING a man in their presence, protecting both of them from their mom and others who were threatened by their being teenage boys. Their mom has paranoid schizophrenia and so when they reached puberty (because of her past behavior while a teenager, promiscuity and drug use), freaked out and withdrew from them. Even before she and I separated. It would be just as WRONG for anyone to inflict a nose ring (like that that goes on a cow, but smaller) on a child or grandchild. Adults need to BE good examples, so their kids will generally be successful in life.

And any grandkids I have will be "spared" my "odd" attire choices, because it would only serve to confuse people who I want to grow up and be themselves. I use "odd" in the sense of being, "not the norm". What I do for attire in my own home is my own business, and need not concern others who will not understand.

Frodo

[Tech]

There you go psychoanalyzing me and my "anger management" issues.

Thanks for proving my point. Individual guys are unique by definition and unless one is honest enough to see clearly that guys who wear clothes made for women might do it for all sorts of reasons.

I got personal about my own situation, because those experiences is what makes me me. I have a right to be angry about the child abuse I suffered, as that kind of abuse goes on even now with many boys growing up. Me being angered does not mean I take it personally anymore. It just makes me want to publicize the problem and work to protect other kids who may be suffering what I was years ago, through no fault of my own.

If I was molested as a child, it would be correct for me to take that righteous anger that I as an adult might have to prosecute or stop others who are doing it now. Too bad many guys are essentially cowards and not standing up and saying the abuse of kids is WRONG and should be condemned, even prosecuted. Too many guys hide and claim ignorance because it does not "concern them" but concerns "strangers". This is how child abusers get away with it.

Yes, I do have an issue with those here who use their dressup to shock or manipulate, jerk people around. It is clearly a powertrip and WRONG. I do not have an issue with those here who use heels subtly in public, or perhaps a skirt outside, that would not be normally noticed by anyone or provoke a reaction.

Frodo

I'm not analysing you or even trying to, I'm just telling you how you come across to others based on what you come out with regularly.

This is NOT a sounding board for child abuse, as bad as that is, this isnt the place for it, so dont go down the same road others have who thought it was a good idea to introduce their own agenda here only to wind up being booted out.

Susan for example with her endless rantings about womens abuse got her booted out too. We dont condone any of those things, but this is NOT the place for it.

So, change the record, or pack your bags.... Clear enough?

[frodo220]

I'm not analyzing you or even trying to, I'm just telling you how you come across to others based on what you come out with regularly.

This is NOT a sounding board for child abuse, as bad as that is, this isnt the place for it, so dont go down the same road others have who thought it was a good idea to introduce their own agenda here only to wind up being booted out.

Susan for example with her endless rantings about womens abuse got her booted out too. We don't condone any of those things, but this is NOT the place for it.

So, change the record, or pack your bags.... Clear enough?

I only brought it up to illustrate my point. Some guys here use heels by their own admission with little regard for how it affects others. One cannot read another's mind or discern people's real motivations for doing so. It is my intention to be blunt and clear when needed how some guys "abuse" their freedom by even involving the innocent.

As I told someone else, I am challenging guys here to THINK clearly how their behavior affects others, and be guided themselves by their own discernment of such.

Do you think it is appropriate for a mother or father to offer their little boy the chance to try on their heels? And not take seriously the answer if the answer is NO? I do not, I believe both actions are wrong. I am challenging men to come to their own conclusions based on their MIND, not feelings or emotions. And leave out the impressionable from their fetishes or fantasies.

For me, much of this must either remain private or between a husband and his wife, and do NOT force others to accept or appreciate behavior out of the norm, when the others tendency is not to do so.

I do take seriously the rules here, and I merely brought up the obvious, that there are male and female predators who prey on people (even children) using the internet to troll for "converts" or to publicize their abuse. This is a public forum, and as such, you people who run this are entitled to censor, even ban people who violate the rules.

I have not done so, so threats or warnings to not go further are not needed.

Cordially,

Frodo

[Tech]

I only brought it up to illustrate my point. Some guys here use heels by their own admission with little regard for how it affects others. One cannot read another's mind or discern people's real motivations for doing so. It is my intention to be blunt and clear when needed how some guys "abuse" their freedom by even involving the innocent.

No, what your doing is accusing guys of wearingheels to provoc reactions from others, and you do it a LOT! so, lets have less of the accusations and hearing how selfish or rude or how it affects others" because there are far worse things people do that affect others than what shoes they have on their feet.

Spitting, discarding chewing gum on the pavement, smoking in public places etc etc, these are all far worse and have far more "immediate" effects, so lets not bring down the tone of what is intended to be a happy place for all to chill out by turning it into an accusation war on what "YOU" think the negative reasons are for guys who want to wear things on their feet.

If you see "inappropriate" pictures elsewhere on other websites, then talk to them about it.

What I'm trying to say to you is, leave your baggage at the door when you come here, otherwise your just going to alienate people against you.

Do I need to continue because my next move will not be a verbal one?

[Bubba136]

More psychoanalyzing. What a load of crap. The whole purposes of my posts is to challenge guys to think about why they are really doing something. Anybody else notice I have not been recommending to anyone here that they need psychological help, and yet some guys do it to me. What hypocrisy! It seems like some guys protesteth too much.

Frodo

Sorry you took my comment in that manner. I was relatively young (16 or so) when I decided that wearing high heels would forever be a part of "who I am" and that the desire would never go away. From that day to this, I've never -- never ever -- again bothered to analyze why I like to wear high heels. I just love to wear woman's shoes. And, that's that. "I am what I am and that's all that I am. I'm a high heel wearing man!" To paraphrase an old cartoon character theme.

Based on your comments, as far as I can tell you are one unhappy puppy. Now then, if I were that unhappy, and having faced all of the belittling and abuse you say you experienced while growing up, I would not walk, meander or dilly dally around. I'd run as fast as I could to the nearest analyst to get my mind straight. You'll never be happy or lead a "productive" life until you come to grips with this aspect of your personality.

One other thing. Now, I don't really care about you or the circumstances that made you so unhappy and drove you to crossdressing and/or wearing high heels, or any other devient behaviour in which you might participate. That's your problem and I really don't want to know anything further about you or your disposition. You've already related enough of your background to tell me more about you than I really care to know. Way too much information for this "social" website.

So, while I do sympathize about your mental state and condition -- strictly because of the effect it has on your well-being -- and wish you a speedy untangling of the issues that keep you trapped and so unhappy, if you are going to put away your heels, get on with it and stop telling everyone about your decision, your problems and bouncing back with criticism at every well meant suggestion put forth by the members of this community --- which, only are trying to help you and take the edge off of your bitterness.

In other words, stop talking about it and get on with what ever you are going to do. IT AIN'T OUR FAULT. And you don't need our help. You aren't going to take it even if offered.

As far as all that "save the world" stuff you're spouting, it's just a cover for your own insecurities. It talks good but leaks water out of every seam. It's just your way of covering up a large void in your entire life.

[vector]

My main point is that labeling ANY guy for such things is WRONG. No one here can read anybody's minds, or diagnose TRUE motivations. It is a stupid exercise.

If a label helps you understand yourself, that is fine. I have a condition called Aspergers Syndrome, and my life does illustrate some aspects of that label, and some aspects do not exist in my case. Yet I realize that is just a label to categorize some people, and is NOT very helpful to cure anyone, when Aspergers is NOT a disease but a way some people communicate with the world.

Frodo

Strange, Frodo, you make this comment, but have been on a minor rant for the last few months about men who wear heels higher that four inches doing it for the reaction and/or cross dressers being "in your face" to attract attention.

Didn't you leave the board because of this same issue?

[Tech]

Forget it, he's out of here. We come here for some enjoyment and to relax, not to have angry old guys coming here to pre-judge and depress us all. If we want depression and bickering we would switch on our TV's and watch eastenders.

[BobHH]

Or just watch the news to get depressed!