t-strap lover Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 It would be cool if all the guest that are on line right now would join HHPlace. I'm in the central time zone, 4:15 PM. t-straps are my favorite style. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amanda Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 I did that sometime ago now. I don't regret it. but I do miss some of the women who threaded and posted here when I first Joined. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lorriette Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 amanda, no offense, but you ladies seem to lack variety on your own forum, yet prove imaginative on the rest of the board. Why not start some threads about reaction to heel wearing in unexpected places, ie. shops, meetings, playgroups or parks. Perhaps even some fictitional dream settings? I'm not saying it would attract more ladies to the board, but since you have your own section, it's worth a try, after all, there's nothing to be lost by trying. totter along into history Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba136 Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 There is one major difference between women and men when it comes to wearing high heels. Usually men wear heels for entirely different reasons than women do. My wife keeps telling me that to most women, high heels are just accessories chosen to match different outfits. The color and style of shoes match the color and style of dress as well as appropriate for the season. Sandals and more open styles for warm weather and boots, pumps and other closed styles for colder weather. Men, on the other hand, usually never chose heels to match their mode of dress. While a few members do make sure that they wear appropriate items that reflect a nice appearance, men don't usually choose the color or style of heels to match the style or color of suite they are wearing. The difference between the way women view shoes (heels) and the way men usually view them, really accounts for the different level of women's participation in this forum. The level of excitement just isn't there in most women. While I agree it would be wonderful to have more women participate in our discussions, we should count our blessings that we attract as many as women to this forum as we have. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amanda Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 amanda, no offense, but you ladies seem to lack variety on your own forum, yet prove imaginative on the rest of the board. Why not start some threads about fictitional dream settings? I'm not sure that would be appropriate for this site Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 The difference between the way women view shoes (heels) and the way men usually view them, really accounts for the different level of women's participation in this forum. The level of excitement just isn't there in most women. That's a real big generalisation. My wife has a shoe collection that takes some beating. [i'm trying.] Most of her shoes have heels, and the only pair she tried on today while shopping, had 6" heels. Okay, they were LK Bennett reduced from £200 to £100 <like these> so weren't going to be a casual purchase ..... But walking towards the front door tonight she made a remark that went something like: "I like these Sketchers so much, <she was wearing a pair> perhaps I'll buy every colour in the range .... " If there's a reason the women members here don't join in with the men's threads, it's doubtless because we don't engage them in a way they would engage each other. Amanda, Ninanoora and Roz will join in becaue they are comfortable talking amongst men in the mens world. These would be the exception rather than the norm. [And it's some of what makes them 'special' people, not just special to us. ] As for "lack of variety" in their own section, just how much can women talk about shoes? Especially given all the discussion about them on the other sections. You know if any section lacks variety, it's the General one. The price of fuel (especially diesel) has been rising weekly since Chrstmas. Today I saw prices that looked very close to £1-30 per litre for diesel, and not much less for petrol. This works out to OVER £6 a gallon "in old money". In the US it's £3-50 a gallon, with subsidies for the poor (I'm told). In India (apparently) fuel is subsidised by the government. With fuel in America potentially half the retail cost it is in the UK, with fuel below cost price in India <one of the fastest growing markets>, why is there no long running thread in the General Chit Chat Forum about this? It can't be, because it isn't affecting every single UK resident. Unless you grow your own food, make your own clothes and walk to work, you have to be noticably poorer now than you were before Christmas 2007. But where is the thread that debates this significant change? I hope I'm not seen as 'going overboard' about this, but I'm stunned anyone would offer suggestions on how to counter 'lack of variety' to women members for their forum? .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba136 Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Sorry fastfreddy2, I just don't know what you're talking about. Either I "hugely" misconstrued your point or you totally missed mine. My point concerned the number of women we (don't) have as members to this forum. I take it that yours concerned the lack of variety of subjects that, in general, would be interesting enough to women to attract their joining and that they would feel comfortabe in discussing with other members - both male and female. My ponint spoke directly to the fact that most male members join the fourm to discuss their interest in high heels, either wearing heels ourselves or admiring women that wear them. And the reason that we don't have more female members is that they just don't look upon shoes in the same light as male members of this forum. That migt be a really big generalization to you, but it's straight to the point as far as I am concerned. (operative word: "most" ) Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roz Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 The main point I want to reply to is that women don't look at their shoes in the same light as men. If it means that women aren't as passionate about shoes, I disagree, but if it means they're not as passionate about posting on a forum about them, yes, agreed. I don't think women are uncomfortable about posting about shoes, I think they talk about them *a lot* off forums with girlfriends etc and go shopping for shoes, and I have seen many surveys that say that shoes are womens' biggest passions, but men, I think, have more to talk about because men wearing heels are in the minority, so I expect a lot of men find it refreshing to visit a forum where they can talk to like-minded people. Regarding the girl's section of the forum, I am disappointed it doesn't get more posts. I have been concious of the fact a lot of women don't post and have tried to start topics in the girls forum to try and stoke up conversation a bit. I might try and make more of an effort, but I hope other women do too. There is a topic on cork and wood heels and surprised not a single person has an opinion on them. I get the impression a lot of girls have left too. I chat to a few members on MSN who never post here which is a shame. I haven't really asked why they don't post as we're normally talking about shoes, lol. Elsewhere around the forum I am careful about what topics I discuss now. A couple of threads in the past have made me (as a girl) feel less welcome here, and in a way ever since I am not as confident about what topics I post in. I'd rather just talk about the shoes not who should/should not wear them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heelma Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 The main point I want to reply to is that women don't look at their shoes in the same light as men. If it means that women aren't as passionate about shoes, I disagree, but if it means they're not as passionate about posting on a forum about them, yes, agreed. [...] I get the impression a lot of girls have left too. I chat to a few members on MSN who never post here which is a shame. I haven't really asked why they don't post as we're normally talking about shoes, lol. Elsewhere around the forum I am careful about what topics I discuss now. A couple of threads in the past have made me (as a girl) feel less welcome here, and in a way ever since I am not as confident about what topics I post in. I'd rather just talk about the shoes not who should/should not wear them All very good points, roz! To my male colleagues: you guys should be a bit more considerate when discussing your heel passions with women. Let's be happy that there are actually some active women posters here. And if there's a girls forum, then it's for girls, and guys shouldn't reply to polls posted there what girls think of men wearing heels. How stupid is that?? (It's something different IMHO though if a man starts a thread in the girls forum by asking something - that should be possible; just like women start threads in the men's forum.) Let's think of why people post here: I totally agree with the point been made here before that there are only a few men who like wearing heels; and this is still not really accepted in the society, even though there are many encouraging reports out here. But this group of men is a very small group with similar problems to deal with, which is mainly concerns of being seen by people who shouldn't know, fear of getting emotionally hurt by being offended, laughed at by others, particularly girls, etc. Women don't have to deal with all that when it comes to heels. So, a big part of the reason why men post here simply doesn't apply to women! When women post here, then mainly because they have some sort of shoe/heel fetish that goes beyond the ordinary reason why women wear heels. My guess is that the others just don't have such a strong (emotional) connection to heels that it's worth their time discussing this here - and particularly in a public forum where men can read what girls are thinking of heels ... which could make some scared of received solicitations in form of private messages, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tech Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I get the impression a lot of girls have left too. I chat to a few members on MSN who never post here which is a shame. I haven't really asked why they don't post as we're normally talking about shoes, lol. Elsewhere around the forum I am careful about what topics I discuss now. A couple of threads in the past have made me (as a girl) feel less welcome here, and in a way ever since I am not as confident about what topics I post in. I'd rather just talk about the shoes not who should/should not wear them Hi Roz Indeed you are right, a lot of girls have left here in the past, some due to the spam the web site used to suffer, but a lot left because of a lack of self control from the guys. (I'm not saying all guys so dont bother replying to that statement) This is why we have to have a seperate Girls forum, and even then, the guys just dont honour it and post in there anyway. Either way, what I wanted to say was, dont feel un-welcome, any where on our web site, feel free to say what you want within normal decency, I certainly do. Now, as for Guests, I think its extremely simple to sum this up in one paragraph, and should be obvious to most already. Women dont spend as much time online as guys do, and are far more social, whereas guys are more technical, and some even seem to feel ashamed or embarrassed by wearing heels (??) so they seek friendship online. I think women probably spend just as much, if not more time talking about shoes (Those who love their shoes) but they actually talk to each other, in the real world, and also, a lot of the things the guys find interesting or exciting to talk about (Some new 2" ugly shoe or crocs or something else) most women might find a non-event so it just wouldnt get a look-in. That sound about right? Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lorriette Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I may have inadvertently hit a raw nerve with some members. The ladies here are lovers of high heels, above and beyond the norm. Comments had been made re: lack of interesting female threads, and I was simply pointing out that they have a unique section to hold interesting (for them) threads, that unless they post, then improvement won't take place. I did commend their posts elsewhere on the board. Thank you all for the lively exchange. lorry totter along into history Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roz Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 Don't worry, you didn't touch a nerve with me, I was just offering my point of view Richie, yes, you understood exactly what I was trying to say. I think as a woman it is easier for me to talk shoes in the 'real world' where as it must be a lot more difficult, even if you have the confidence to wear heels in public. I agree the girl's forum is a lot quieter, but there are far less girl members here from what I can work out. I have posted a few new threads, polls and topics in the Girls Only forum, so hopefully this might encourage more conversation, but at the moment more men have replied to my posts there than girls Don't worry guys, I'm not offended, I just hope that more girls will seize the opportunity and talk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tech Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 Thanks Roz, we could use more female members like you, might balance out some of the guys here Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 Sorry fastfreddy2, I just don't know what you're talking about. Either I "hugely" misconstrued your point or you totally missed mine. ...... That migt be a really big generalization to you, but it's straight to the point as far as I am concerned. (operative word: "most" ) "Most" women don't care about shoes, other than making sure they fit and are available in colour 'a' or colour 'b'. Beyond that "most" are completely disinterested. If that was your point, then we are like minded. But the women who post here are more interested in shoes than "most", and certainly the 3 or 4 women I talk to regularly are interested in shoes more than "most" too. I didn't see the pertinence of your reference if it was directed at the group outside our sphere of contact here? But my comments weren't really tilted toward your comment, other then to say (or infer too subtley it would seem) that your comment isn't pertinent here. My comments were tilted more towards this remarK: amanda, no offense, but you ladies seem to lack variety on your own forum, yet prove imaginative on the rest of the board. Perhaps I should have quoted this instead, and made myself plainer? Maybe this will have cleared any misunderstanding. ...... ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fastfreddy2 Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 I agree the girl's forum is a lot quieter, but there are far less girl members here from what I can work out. I have posted a few new threads, polls and topics in the Girls Only forum, so hopefully this might encourage more conversation, but at the moment more men have replied to my posts there than girls I'd like to applaud the effort you make here. Amanda has a fair go at stimulating conversation too. Ninanoora seems to have gone a bit quiet, though that may be work related, and Fashionista seems to have disappeared? One or two others 'dip in' from time to time, but don't post often? I'm sure everyone here would like more (active) girl members, and more postings from the women who are members. But as has been suggested by more than just myself, women operate (communicate) in a different way to men. I don't feel a debate on mutual insecurities would be beneficial, but us men (seemingly the larger group here) have a responsibility to accomodate those (who as a smaller ~ different group), may struggle to find their own position within the larger combined group? Expecting men/women to find lots of common ground in a single subject type is hopelessly optimistic in my view. If I were to talk to anyone, offline or face-to-face and they only wanted to talk about one thing, I'd get bored pretty quickly..... Perhaps with that in mind everyone can better understand lorriette's comment, but it was definitely "the pot calling the kettle black", as I tried to illustrate all too clumsily it would seem. Us men can and do talk about HH to the exclusion of everything else, as I tried to point out. And if there's one thing I've learned about women; they don't like being bored by us men. Given a choice between being involved in a (for them) single-subject forum, and talking face-to-face with the other people in their lives, it's not even a two horse race. I think the answer is the whole board, not just the womens section, needs to be more diverse. And when I read a thread in the General Section of someone being upset about the price of fuel, I'll know something more akin to 'normal life' is going on here, rather than 100 or so HH 'anoraks' talking amongst themselves. And let me apologise straight away if that comment upsets ANYONE, because it's not meant to. What I'm trying to do is stimulate some positive thought about how to make the forum more attractive to women members, and possibly broaden the conversational horizons of the male members here. I'll try harder to contribute or start non-shoe topics, or perhaps start some topics that are only faintly shoe-related. But my message here is, if you want women to participate, discuss subjects they might be interested in. Just like you would in the 'real world'? ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roniheels Posted June 6, 2008 Share Posted June 6, 2008 roz... Thank you for continuing to contribute your thoughts and opinions here on-line. I look forward to seeing what you have to say and enjoy your photos that you have shared with us. When I first joined high heel place, I could not believe the number of men who were members, those who contributed, and especially those who enjoyed wearing high heels. I was a little surprised at the ratio of men to women. I too noticed the difference in attitude (maybe too strong of a word) between men and women concerning the purchasing and wearing of high heels. Women talk about high heels and female fashions because it is part of their accepted wear and appearal. When men talk about the purchasing and wearing of high heels, this defies the norms and sterotypes of men and "their fashions." It is different, scary, fun, and exciting. This is how I feel everytime I wear high heels in public. But I'm guessing you and other women might not share this feeling. That's why it is fun for me to share not only my high heel collection, but my experiences of wearing high heels in public with women, and especially other men who also enjoy wearing high heels. This coinsides with all of the various reactions I have received publicly from all types of women. But I appreciate all of their reactions. This is just my perspective and one opinion. Please feel free to comment about this or anything else anytime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hhboots Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 Good discussion, I agree with points made by several people. I am new to this site, but do feel much more comfortable talking about this topic here than anywhere else, where as women can talk to any of their friends openly in most cases about their fashions, so would not really need to come here so much I would think. I mean, at least I do have my wife to say some of this too, and while being very understanding and supportive of my thoughts in this area, is not the same as talking to guys in my same situation so openly. So, I am quite happy that we guys are so welcome here and that this forum exists. Since I have not been here that long, I don't know how many more women used to post here historically, but that is unfortunate if there has been a decline. Hope there can be some sort of way to rebound the female numbers here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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