JeffB Posted December 10, 2006 Share Posted December 10, 2006 Fear, in whatever form and for whatever reason is a great crippler as it keeps us closeted and unwilling to venture out into the light. And perhaps the most prevalent fear of all is the unknown. Each and every time we go out in heels, we have absolutely no idea what to expect from the world at large. While, more often than not, we go ignored by the public, there's no way to know that beforehand, no way to know in advance exactly what might happen on an outing: nothing, or something catastrophic. Nor is there any way to prepare for what might happen because you don't know what sort of incident you might face. 99 1/2 percent of the time, nothing will happen to you on an outing and you'll have a great time, but in the back of your mind, you wonder about that idle 1/2 percent and how it could bite you in the ass if you're not careful. That's how fear (helped along by an overactive imagination) can plague your mind. Even though fear can't be eliminated, it can however be controlled. As long as you understand your fear, recognize it for what it is, you can do whatever's neccesary to put that misery in its place. It also helps to be smart about what you wear and where you choose to go. Case in point: all my outings are in broad daylight, and in highly public places like shopping malls where the chances of unfortunate incidents are practically nonexistent. In the end, some of us may never leave the closet as their lives are gripped by fear, but for those of us who have, it's an extremely liberating feeling. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmc Posted December 10, 2006 Share Posted December 10, 2006 As one rather notable U.S. President once stated, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself." Have a happy time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
micha Posted December 11, 2006 Share Posted December 11, 2006 Fear, in whatever form and for whatever reason is a great crippler as it keeps us closeted and unwilling to venture out into the light. And perhaps the most prevalent fear of all is the unknown. Each and every time we go out in heels, we have absolutely no idea what to expect from the world at large. While, more often than not, we go ignored by the public, there's no way to know that beforehand, no way to know in advance exactly what might happen on an outing: nothing, or something catastrophic. Nor is there any way to prepare for what might happen because you don't know what sort of incident you might face. 99 1/2 percent of the time, nothing will happen to you on an outing and you'll have a great time, but in the back of your mind, you wonder about that idle 1/2 percent and how it could bite you in the ass if you're not careful. That's how fear (helped along by an overactive imagination) can plague your mind. Even though fear can't be eliminated, it can however be controlled. As long as you understand your fear, recognize it for what it is, you can do whatever's neccesary to put that misery in its place. It also helps to be smart about what you wear and where you choose to go. Case in point: all my outings are in broad daylight, and in highly public places like shopping malls where the chances of unfortunate incidents are practically nonexistent. In the end, some of us may never leave the closet as their lives are gripped by fear, but for those of us who have, it's an extremely liberating feeling. JeffB, you seem to be still the old one. I would underline every letter of your answer :academic: The best fashion is your own fashion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted December 11, 2006 Share Posted December 11, 2006 Well said JeffB. All my recent outings have been after dark, but that's around 4pm at the moment so I don't have a lot of choice! I honestly believe that nobody is going to attack me for wearing heels. The kind of person that would is just as likely to attack me for wearing a leather jacket / shaving my head / having blue eyes / looking at his pint. That is to say that some people just go looking for trouble. Avoiding places that you know attract idiots is good advice, no matter what you're wearing. Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danielinheels Posted December 12, 2006 Share Posted December 12, 2006 I'm still fairly new to my area, so I'm trying to feel out where it is/isn't a good idea to go heeling and such. Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. - Oscar Wilde Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whynotheels Posted December 15, 2006 Share Posted December 15, 2006 Embarrassing my wife. I steer clear of the areas in which I might get hurt regardless of what I'm wearing. I would be find with people pointing and laughing at me, but I love my wife too much to embarrass her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heelma Posted December 15, 2006 Share Posted December 15, 2006 How likely is it that a stranger who recognized you wear heels meets you days/weeks/months later and will say something like "Weren't you the one I saw ones wearing heels?" Possibly, when you are together with relatives or colleagues who don't know and who shouldn't know ... I'm not talking about a random stranger on the street but let's say store personal. Or, what if you had at least a brief conversation with someone about your heels earlier? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Krapsparov Posted December 16, 2006 Share Posted December 16, 2006 Well said JeffB. All my recent outings have been after dark, but that's around 4pm at the moment so I don't have a lot of choice! I honestly believe that nobody is going to attack me for wearing heels. The kind of person that would is just as likely to attack me for wearing a leather jacket / shaving my head / having blue eyes / looking at his pint. That is to say that some people just go looking for trouble. Avoiding places that you know attract idiots is good advice, no matter what you're wearing. Chris Coupled with the fact your built like a brick shithouse and a kickboxer!! I wouldn't mess with you if you where dressed as the christmas fairy!! I find city centers in the middle of the day really safe!! The darker it gets, the braver idiots are. Jon Never try to baptise a cat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnieheel Posted December 16, 2006 Author Share Posted December 16, 2006 Malls have high security and I have even been told by a number of women in shoe stores that it's about the most safe place to wear your heels. real men wear heels Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jmc Posted December 17, 2006 Share Posted December 17, 2006 Malls have high security and I have even been told by a number of women in shoe stores that it's about the most safe place to wear your heels. Shopping malls are pretty safe from the standpoint of being assaulted -- either physically or verbally. Being places of business, they well recognize that any feeling of less than complete safety tends to drive customers (and sales) away. So seciruty tends to be pretty tight. My biggest worry about heeling in the local shopping mall would be running into somebody I know and having to explain my choice of footwear. For now I just stay with something conservative enough that it will not attract attention, or go to a mall far enough away that I am not likely to encounter somebody I know. Have a happy time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted December 17, 2006 Share Posted December 17, 2006 Coupled with the fact your built like a brick shithouse and a kickboxer!! I wouldn't mess with you if you where dressed as the christmas fairy!! Jon Yeah well, that helps a bit! I'd not thought about dressing like the christmas fairy, can I do the goth version? Maybe black tutu, stripy tights and *really* high heels? Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
micha Posted December 17, 2006 Share Posted December 17, 2006 Coupled with the fact your built like a brick shithouse and a kickboxer!! I wouldn't mess with you if you where dressed as the christmas fairy!! I find city centers in the middle of the day really safe!! The darker it gets, the braver idiots are. Jon Hi Jon, I agree to your punk-style-answer. I'm wearing regularly high heels on the street - even on a christmas fair. I hope, that the darker it gets, the more we guys are pondering about our shy midnight excursions. micha (*convinced day light heeler*) The best fashion is your own fashion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawn HH Posted December 19, 2006 Share Posted December 19, 2006 Not only are Shopping Malls safer and more secure, but an excellent place to just sit on a bench and watch the public walking along in front of you. Mickey and I do this a lot and you would be amazed at the sights that you see just watching the world go by. Besides that---it's great for girl watching. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffB Posted December 19, 2006 Share Posted December 19, 2006 Not only are Shopping Malls safer and more secure, but an excellent place to just sit on a bench and watch the public walking along in front of you. Mickey and I do this a lot and you would be amazed at the sights that you see just watching the world go by. Besides that---it's great for girl watching. Cheers--- Dawn HH Not only that, by watching other women and what they're wearing, you can get ideas for what you'd like to wear as well. Case in point: watching women wearing pointy toed heels led me to buy the rsvp pumps I currently own. Heh! I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 I know I said this before somewhere, but I really like those shoes. I really need to stop buying boots for a bit... Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heellovr79 Posted December 21, 2006 Share Posted December 21, 2006 I worry about the repercussions about my heel wearing. Although my mother knows about it, and has tolerated it, it's my professional colleagues and friends that I worry about. Not so much physical, but verbally and emotionally. The sting from that can be much worse than any physical harm. Black patent, open toed high heels are the best! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 If your friends are true friends then they won't disown you for it. I worried about telling mine but they were fine, albeit surprised. You can't choose your colleagues though, which is why I'm keeping my heels away from work. Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
highHEELman Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 My profession, sales, necissatates I wear only modest footwear to work, Bass loafers, deck shoes, Cole Hahn Mocs, all flats. I have worn 4" HEELS in public with no problem but I did avoid crowds. I wear Antonio Mellani flats Feminine penny loafer look) to make calls ocassionally. I do not ever wear a mans shoe..NEVER! Never met another Fan of Fine Feminine Footwear. Would like to share some experiences. In S Alabama. HHM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShockQueen Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 When I first started doing heeling and/or TV activities, I quickly found out who my real friends were, as those who really weren't were put off/pushed off by my appearance, while those that were true friends were very supportive and didn't take any offense. In the area I'm in now, I kinda have to be careful, but the places I do my heeling at, they're not likely to be anyhow, so it's no big deal. SQ.....still busting societal molds with a smile...and a 50-ton sledge! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil_hh Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 Hi all, Following on from a couple of threads here, I was wondering (as still very much a novice public heal wearer) what other peoples concers are, or what the main reasons are for being so nervous about going out. For me, it's being spotted or bumping into people who I know but don't know that I wear heels. This is particularly true for people in my immediate neighbourhood - I can just imagine someone's kid saying to one of mine something like "my mum says she really likes your dad's high heels". This sort of story would spread like wildfire here. For my next (more major) public outing I think I'll drive to another town to do the shopping or get fuel or whatever the outing is. I don't mind if others see me in heels, but I could do without having to explain that side of me to those who it really does not concern or is not appropriate for. I think it's fairly unlikely that I'd get hassle from others (being just under 6' 1" barefoot) so being noticed or even commented on by people who don't know me and will never see me again is OK by me. Other comments / thoughts would be helpful (particularly, I think in building the confidence of timid public heelers). Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 Hi Phil If I could direct you to this thread, you'll get your answers... Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil_hh Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 Oh - Sorry - Missed that thread when I looked back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris100575 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 No worries, it's easily done! Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geo_t Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 When I first started doing heeling and/or TV activities, I quickly found out who my real friends were, as those who really weren't were put off/pushed off by my appearance, while those that were true friends were very supportive and didn't take any offense. Amen, brother... sister... fellow human. True friends will stick with you. I still remember the first time I appeared in heels to some really good friends. We were getting together for a low-key party and I wore high heel pumps. After an initial round of "wow" "awesome" and "how do you walk in them" it was a non-issue and we just got on with having a good time. Maybe I have been fortunate in those I call friends - no-one turned their back on me because of what I wear. Now work acquaintances are different. In an office of several hundred people there's only one person who knows my "secret" (and she's also good friends with my SO which helps) and a few people have seen my Halloween pictures but I don't think they know what I do the other 364 days of the year. As I now find myself working for the man in a very conservative field of business, in a very conservative city in a very conservative state I somehow think that wearing heels in the office would have disastrous consequences for my career in this town. Now meeting work people away from work while wearing heels... ah, I don't know... guess I'll worry about that if or when it happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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