Stilletto2004 Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 After reading the posts from Jeffb and Thighhighbootguy I sit here amazed. How difficult it must have been to come to these conclusions about themselves. And how hard it must have been for them to accept what they discovered - and then move to change it. I find the honest truth these two have shared with us to be truly inspiring. It could not have been easy. I think everything that JB and TBG have gone through hits each and every one of us in one way or another. And I thank both of them for that, for it truly made me think. I don't think I am obsessed - but I CAN see myself becoming that way. And these posts give me reason to make sure I keep MYSELF in check. And I can not thank either of them enough for that - it inspired me to do some soul searching of myself. That's what makes this forum great. It's not the stories about, "Hey I wore heels to the store." Its about the support, companionship, and help that this group of FRIENDS offers each other. Thank you, all. For this great place. And a place that I guarantee you I never thought would make me look long and hard into the mirror. But it did. And that is truly amazing - like all of you. Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wineanddine Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 I couldn't have said it any better. Thanks to all of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffB Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 After reading the posts from Jeffb and Thighhighbootguy I sit here amazed. How difficult it must have been to come to these conclusions about themselves. And how hard it must have been for them to accept what they discovered - and then move to change it. I find the honest truth these two have shared with us to be truly inspiring. It could not have been easy. I think everything that JB and TBG have gone through hits each and every one of us in one way or another. And I thank both of them for that, for it truly made me think. I don't think I am obsessed - but I CAN see myself becoming that way. And these posts give me reason to make sure I keep MYSELF in check. And I can not thank either of them enough for that - it inspired me to do some soul searching of myself. That's what makes this forum great. It's not the stories about, "Hey I wore heels to the store." Its about the support, companionship, and help that this group of FRIENDS offers each other. Thank you, all. For this great place. And a place that I guarantee you I never thought would make me look long and hard into the mirror. But it did. And that is truly amazing - like all of you. The pleasure was all mine. I'm glad that my experiences gave you pause to think about your own situation. I just wanted everyone to know why I did what I did, how I was forced into taking the actions that I did, and how the passion can become overwhelming, even all-consuming if you're not careful and fail to see the warning signs of something pleasant mutating into something obsessive and unpleasant. I honestly never thought that would happen to me, but it did. The rest of the story you now know. Hopefully, your road will wind up being a lot less bumpy than mine had been. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HighHeelArt Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 I totally agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
micha Posted November 28, 2006 Share Posted November 28, 2006 I could't have said it better! Like "wineanddine" answered. micha The best fashion is your own fashion! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docs41 Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Like Buddha said, "Moderation in all things." I just hope I can practice it too!!!! If the shoe fits-buy it!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stilletto2004 Posted November 30, 2006 Author Share Posted November 30, 2006 If the shoe fits, buy it!! Be careful. Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr1819 Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Having seen this throughout several posts, I think we're on the verge of moving beyond a forum of obsession with heels to a forum that supports fashion freedom without obsession overtones. That's the good news, as the rest of society is keen on detecting and rejecting obsessive tendancies. If we can, en masse, move beyond this phas (some are far more ahead than others, but I think nearly all of us on this board have made progress along these lines over the years), I believe our calm steady presence will win the case for heels on men throughout society. Indeed, when I stride into a pub downtown wearing my new pair of Vanelli 3-1/2" boots as I did earlier today, take a stool, which affords all onlookers a glance at my heels, and order a beer while receiving nothing more than a smile from the staff (who know I wear heels, but who also know me as just another one of the normal Americans), then I'd like to think I've arrived. That's what happened earlier this afternoon, and one of them even asked, "new shoes?" to which I replied, "yes, I got them in the mail today." Her comment was, "those are nice - I like them." When that same staff asks you to accompany them to another pub, or a nightclub after they get off work (around 1am) knowing that they're very sober and you're wearing heels, it really underscores the fact that one's personal underlying character with respect to how they view themselves carries more weight than what they're wearing. I think that's why Prince sold so many albums despite the fact that everyone knew he was wearing heels, and Boy George did so well despite the fact that he wore makeup and appeared effiminate. It's not just because they were celebrities. Long before Ru Paul because a celebrity, he was doing much the same thing. It's because of the way he carried himself that he because a celebrity - not because of the fact that he dressed like a girl. Thousands, if not millions, have done that. But Ru Paul carried himself in a way that sold. Whether it's in the entertainment industry (Vin Diesel, Harrison Ford, Tom Cruise, Daniel Craig, or Cameron Diaz), how a person carries themselves speaks far more about who they are, underneath, than their choice of clothing. People, Vogue, and Cosmo might not want you to believe this, but do not forget that most of their income comes from the fashion merchandisers - they have a vested interest in ensuring that you swallow their tripe and start following the fashion tips that just all too coincidentally happen to jibe with what's being offered by their major contributors. Duh. Have we become so stupid we can't see through this fallacious tripe? One of the things that most people aren't aware of is precisely how little influence the fashion designers have on the fashions adopted by the public. Less than 7% of the designs presented on the runways actually find their way into maintream retailing, and that's because the mainstream retailers aren't fooled by glamour shots of runway models wearing the whims of their designers. They know what will sell and what won't. Strangely enough, that's also one of the reasons why more stores than ever, including Nordstroms, Zappos, and many others are offering heeled shoes in sizes from 12 to 15 - because they know men are buying them, and they really don't care about who buys their products. All they're interested in is how many shoes they sell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffB Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 One of the things that most people aren't aware of is precisely how little influence the fashion designers have on the fashions adopted by the public. Less than 7% of the designs presented on the runways actually find their way into maintream retailing, and that's because the mainstream retailers aren't fooled by glamour shots of runway models wearing the whims of their designers. They know what will sell and what won't. Strangely enough, that's also one of the reasons why more stores than ever, including Nordstroms, Zappos, and many others are offering heeled shoes in sizes from 12 to 15 - because they know men are buying them, and they really don't care about who buys their products. All they're interested in is how many shoes they sell. Not just men, women are taller now than in past generations, and they need shoes in sizes beyond 9 and 10 as the stereotype of women with tiny feet has gone the way of the dinosaur. At the end of the day, it's all about supply and demand, and as long as women (and men) demand larger sized shoes, retailers, always eager to fatten up their wallets will provide the supply. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shrimper Posted December 2, 2006 Share Posted December 2, 2006 Several women that I've known or read about, including a couple of WNBA stars, admit to shopping at Payless because they carry stylish shoes in larger sizes. Upmarket companies are taking note of this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thighbootguy Posted December 2, 2006 Share Posted December 2, 2006 I really do feel a sense of community on this board and was hoping that posting my experience would be helpful. The other reason for posting was that you can’t fix a problem unless you know what the problem is. Writing it down helped and I was hoping that if “I had it all wrong” someone would have pointed it out. I do feel that I’m much more in control of things than I was. I still go shopping wearing thigh boots with 5” stiletto heels but its because I like the style and enjoy the look rather than having to do it. Leather skirts however are something I still have to come to grips with and I’m working on that. I really am captivated by the pictures posted by stefani boots and there is a strong desire to give that look a try but I think doing that would run me right off the deep end again so I’m “cooling my heels” (my grandmothers expression for stopping for a while) on that look. Thanks for all the comments, they really helped. I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr1819 Posted December 2, 2006 Share Posted December 2, 2006 It's good to hear things are coming along, Thighbootguy! :academic: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kneehighs Posted December 3, 2006 Share Posted December 3, 2006 ...the fact that one's personal underlying character with respect to how they view themselves carries more weight than what they're wearing. how a person carries themselves speaks far more about who they are, underneath, than their choice of clothing.Very exquisite analysis, DEE-ARE. Attire + Attitude = Assimilation (of our community interests) I think both Attire and Attitude work interdependently of one another. If you have great Attire, but a bad Attitude, you will have minimal success freestyling. Likewise, if you have bad Attire but a great Attitude, you will have some success freestyling. For the most success freestyling, a combination of both great Attire and a great Attitude is essential. By great Attire I mean first and foremost cleanliness, an element of attire rarely discussed here. Cleanliness would mean well groomed hair, well bathed, clean clothes, neatly pressed shirts, neatly pressed pants, clean shoes, clean nose (I snip my nose hairs, make sure my nostrils are free from debris and hair), clean teeth (make sure you don't have arugula lodged between your two front teeth) etc. etc. In my opinion, being clean probably heightens your chances for a powerful first impression and rapid assimilation and acceptance more than anything else. That probably holds true for all facets of life, not just freestyling. By great Attitude, I mean begin with good manners and etiquette. Smile for starters. Say "please" and "thank you". Remember people's names...be a good listener... Less than 7% of the designs presented on the runways actually find their way into maintream retailing, :academic: Just out of curiosity, what reputable source do you have to substantiate that 7% claim? Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeffB Posted December 3, 2006 Share Posted December 3, 2006 I really do feel a sense of community on this board and was hoping that posting my experience would be helpful. The other reason for posting was that you can’t fix a problem unless you know what the problem is. Writing it down helped and I was hoping that if “I had it all wrong” someone would have pointed it out. It's certainly good to know that the comments here have helped you as other here helped me with their kind words. This is indeed quite a unique and special community, one I'm certainly glad to be part of. I do feel that I’m much more in control of things than I was. I still go shopping wearing thigh boots with 5” stiletto heels but its because I like the style and enjoy the look rather than having to do it. Yeah, isn't that a great feeling, knowing that you are in command instead of the other way around. It's a pity that for most of us, we have to go to extremes like purges or going cold turkey in order to regain control, something that's not at all easy. Leather skirts however are something I still have to come to grips with and I’m working on that. I really am captivated by the pictures posted by stefani boots and there is a strong desire to give that look a try but I think doing that would run me right off the deep end again so I’m “cooling my heels” (my grandmothers expression for stopping for a while) on that look. A smart course of action. You wouldn't want to go overboard and repeat the mistakes of the past. While that is a nice look, wearing skirts is no longer something I yearn to do. I'll just stick with the shoes. Good luck to you! I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr1819 Posted December 5, 2006 Share Posted December 5, 2006 ...make sure you don't have arugula lodged between your two front teeth... Arugula? Sounds like some seefood dish. Please note the spelling... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawn HH Posted December 5, 2006 Share Posted December 5, 2006 Dr1819:-) WHEW!!! You do really love statistics and you do well with them. I have learned a lot lately. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kneehighs Posted December 5, 2006 Share Posted December 5, 2006 Arugula? Sounds like some seefood dish. Please note the spelling... "see-food" ha! It only took my dense head like four hours to comprehend the humor behind that statement! Thanks for the summary on statistics. I now better understand how you think and appreciate how your justify your percentage conclusion. Feminine Style . Masculine Soul. Skin In The Game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobHH Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 TLAR is a good check on any data. If it doesn't look about right, then it should be looked into further. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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