No More "Hiding."

[Gige]

I do not mean to be the center of attention here or dominate this discussion board but lately, that which I have been experiencing has led me to become super confident in wearing heels out and about. I came to this forum many years ago so wanting to wear heels out in public but never believed that I would ever walk out of my residence doing so. Now, I cannot imagine leaving my place not wearing a pair of heels, even if it is to run my garbage to the dumpster, a distance of ~250ft. I was so very inspired by so many posts on this forum to take those steps to accept who I am - a guy to loves to wear heels, and “allow” myself to be seen while wearing them. I looked at many pictures here and was envious of individuals like @CAT because he dressed in the style (and yes, he has it!) I always wanted to do but never thought would be possible. Now, I have outfits the scream style, elegance, and professionalism.  And I say this with all the humor in the world, but I hope I am giving him a run for his money! 😍

Over a year’s time, I have gone from being so frightened of being seen in heels to a point where I want the world to see me “en femme,” and I really do not care what others think about it. If someone has an issue of me wearing heels or even flats with a skirt in public, then that is their problem, not mine. I have told those close to me about this – my family, friends, colleagues, and most importantly, my beloved wife of 32 years as of 10/31 (Yes, I was married on Halloween and this year we will be celebrating it in Salem, Massachusetts). I have come to ask the question of, if those who are important to me know about my love of wearing heels and accept it, then from whom and what am I hiding? I am reminded of the line from Dr. Seuss, “Those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind” How very true.

I chose the name “Gigi” based on a few factors. I am a huge hockey fan and some time ago, there was a gentleman from New Brunswick, Canada, named Ghislaine Hebert who was (and I think still is) a referee in the NHL. My wife and I loved that named and agreed that if we ever had a daughter (we are childless by choice) we would name her Ghislaine. I have also always loved the name Genevive and thus, Ghislaine Genevive, or “Gige” was “born.” Gige, however, is not who I am and masks my true identity. That being the case, I want to properly introduce myself to all as I no longer want to hide who and what I am!

My real name is Richard and I live just outside of Springfield, Illinois, the state capital; I am a fraud investigator by profession. As some of you know or have deduced, I am originally from Chicago and have a love/hate relationship with that city. I have seen a few other transgender males around my part of the world but they are often much younger than me. I do not approach them as based on solid advice from @mlroseplant, it is probably best not to do so for a multitude of reasons. If, however, someone should approach me and want to talk about or compliment my outfit, I will always make time for them. As much as I love wearing heels, I also love talking about them. If, to the contrary, someone wants to criticize my outfit, then I will be happy to let them know that it takes more courage to be a man wearing heels in public than critiquing those who do. That being the case, if anyone is my neck of the woods or heading up/into Chicago and wants to talk heels somewhere (no strings attached, no obligations, no attempts to “pick-up” anyone – I’m married after all!) let me know as I would be happy to do so.

I end with this thought from a meme I saw somewhere…What do you call a man who wears high heels? Answer – a person who want to be happy!    

Thanks so much to everyone for your stories and inspiration. I could not have ever walked out in public in a pair of heels without them!

Photo - another day of catching those trying to "scam the system."

[mlroseplant]

Don't worry about posting too much on here, you're just taking over for me while I try to figure out why I don't feel like posting much lately. Your transformation, both physically and mentally has happened at lightning speed. After more than 12 years, I'm not at all sure that I want people to notice me, which is kind of silly, isn't it? After all, I'm on livestream every week that is archived forever and ever, amen.

I would caution against becoming too manic with this newfound confidence, if for no other reason than because it has come quickly. You seem like you're very conscious of taste and style, but I've witnessed a couple of different people who found that taste of freedom and confidence, but failed to follow the adage, "Just because you can wear something doesn't mean you should." You seem an unlikely candidate for that particular problem, but I'm just putting that out there. Everything I've seen looks very nice.

[pebblesf]

Richard-

I just want to compliment you on accomplishing more in one year than I have accomplished in over ten years.  You really look great buddy.  I too, love to talk heels with other guys/gals.  And, it is just how you put it:  "it takes plenty of courage and confidence to wear outfits that other guys only dream of secretly".   You have taken good care of your body and look great in all your outfits, you deserve the pleasure of wearing them for the rest of the world to enjoy, if they want to.  If they don't, who cares!  I can honestly say, that I have reached that same level of confidence while wearing my boots.  I know that other guys do notice, and are envious, even though they would never admit it.  I used to be somewhat of "a deer in the headlights" when I would get the rare compliment, but now I take the time to thank whoever it is and continue the conversation if they want to.  

You are so fortunate that has a loving wife that is secure in your relationship and wants you to be happy.  Take special care of her for sure!  I wish your wife could talk with my better half for sure!  My love of boots has always been a thorn in our relationship, and I understand, to a point.  But, a little acceptance would go a long way for sure.  We both know my love of boots is not going away.  

I work for the airlines and sometimes layover in downtown Chicago, or near ORD.  Always looking for heel guys to hang out with.  All the best.  Don

[Gige]

14 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

Don't worry about posting too much on here, you're just taking over for me while I try to figure out why I don't feel like posting much lately. Your transformation, both physically and mentally has happened at lightning speed. After more than 12 years, I'm not at all sure that I want people to notice me, which is kind of silly, isn't it? After all, I'm on livestream every week that is archived forever and ever, amen.

I would caution against becoming too manic with this newfound confidence, if for no other reason than because it has come quickly. You seem like you're very conscious of taste and style, but I've witnessed a couple of different people who found that taste of freedom and confidence, but failed to follow the adage, "Just because you can wear something doesn't mean you should." You seem an unlikely candidate for that particular problem, but I'm just putting that out there. Everything I've seen looks very nice.

First, as always, thanks for the compliments! It is great to know that others appreciate the effort I make to always present myself as being well-put-together.

I tend to believe that there is only so much one can say on any given topic no matter how well versed s/he may be about it. Likewise, we tend to get tired of focusing on the same topic time and time again. A few years ago I completed my studies for my Masters degree and was strongly encouraged to pursue a doctorate. Spending up to four years of my life on a single focus, however, was just about as appealing as eating dirt. I feel the same about any subject - there is a time when I need to take a break from it if I can say or learn no more about it. This even applies to heels - there is only so much one can say about it. 

Yes, I am very attuned to both taste and style so that I always present myself in a professional manner. Whereas yesterday's outfit was a skirt and boots, that which I wore today consisted of black kitten heel pumps, black pants, a black and white striped sweater, and a black cardigan. Not at all to disparage her, I felt as if I took my outfit cues from a casual day for Vice President Harris. I think attire standards have sunk so low in recent years that there is no longer a line between casual/comfort and anything else. I recently conducted an interview of an individual who was the target of an investigation and asked a newly hired colleague to join me for such. I told her that the boss wants us in professional attire for such activities but leaves it up each individual to determine what form that takes. My colleague arrived wearing an oversized shirt dress and Birkenstock sandals. I had to stop and shake my head in disbelief that anyone could think that such an outfit could remotely passes for more than 'lounging around the house' attire. Despite being "out" at the time of this interview, I still wore a dress shirt and a tie. I am all for higher heels and hemlines but, again, within reason. You will never see me wearing skirts/short that are so miniscule they could serve as an ice skater's skirt or swim trunks. Likewise, you will never see me wear heels so high that I need the assistance of others just to maintain my balance in them (i.e. Lady Gaga).      

14 hours ago, pebblesf said:

Richard-

I just want to compliment you on accomplishing more in one year than I have accomplished in over ten years.  You really look great buddy.  I too, love to talk heels with other guys/gals.  And, it is just how you put it:  "it takes plenty of courage and confidence to wear outfits that other guys only dream of secretly".   You have taken good care of your body and look great in all your outfits, you deserve the pleasure of wearing them for the rest of the world to enjoy, if they want to.  If they don't, who cares!  I can honestly say, that I have reached that same level of confidence while wearing my boots.  I know that other guys do notice, and are envious, even though they would never admit it.  I used to be somewhat of "a deer in the headlights" when I would get the rare compliment, but now I take the time to thank whoever it is and continue the conversation if they want to.  

You are so fortunate that has a loving wife that is secure in your relationship and wants you to be happy.  Take special care of her for sure!  I wish your wife could talk with my better half for sure!  My love of boots has always been a thorn in our relationship, and I understand, to a point.  But, a little acceptance would go a long way for sure.  We both know my love of boots is not going away.  

I work for the airlines and sometimes layover in downtown Chicago, or near ORD.  Always looking for heel guys to hang out with.  All the best.  Don

Thank you so kindly for the compliment(s) - always greatly appreciated. I tend to think that confidence is like a snowball on a hill - once it gets started, it will be become bigger and bigger until it comes to a stop. Once a little confidence is built and the person is will to keep building it, it will continue to grow stronger and stronger. As this point I have such a "who cares" disposition that it may be frightening to some. I am not at all "in your face" about it but more of a notice if you will and think what you want - I really do not care about either. I have always wondered about how many men I see who are secretly envious of us. 

ORD holds a very special place with me - I have traveled in and out of that airfield so many times. In fact, all of my recent international flights have been from and back to ORD even though I live much closer to STL. If I left STL for an international destination, chances are that I would have to transfer at ORD. If you are ever in Chicago for a while, make an outreach and I will see what I can do. I can not promise I can get there as I have very limited free time from work. I am, however, willing to give it a try if possible. 

[mlroseplant]

8 hours ago, Gige said:

First, as always, thanks for the compliments! It is great to know that others appreciate the effort I make to always present myself as being well-put-together.

I tend to believe that there is only so much one can say on any given topic no matter how well versed s/he may be about it. Likewise, we tend to get tired of focusing on the same topic time and time again. A few years ago I completed my studies for my Masters degree and was strongly encouraged to pursue a doctorate. Spending up to four years of my life on a single focus, however, was just about as appealing as eating dirt. I feel the same about any subject - there is a time when I need to take a break from it if I can say or learn no more about it. This even applies to heels - there is only so much one can say about it. 

Yes, I am very attuned to both taste and style so that I always present myself in a professional manner. Whereas yesterday's outfit was a skirt and boots, that which I wore today consisted of black kitten heel pumps, black pants, a black and white striped sweater, and a black cardigan. Not at all to disparage her, I felt as if I took my outfit cues from a casual day for Vice President Harris. I think attire standards have sunk so low in recent years that there is no longer a line between casual/comfort and anything else. I recently conducted an interview of an individual who was the target of an investigation and asked a newly hired colleague to join me for such. I told her that the boss wants us in professional attire for such activities but leaves it up each individual to determine what form that takes. My colleague arrived wearing an oversized shirt dress and Birkenstock sandals. I had to stop and shake my head in disbelief that anyone could think that such an outfit could remotely passes for more than 'lounging around the house' attire. Despite being "out" at the time of this interview, I still wore a dress shirt and a tie. I am all for higher heels and hemlines but, again, within reason. You will never see me wearing skirts/short that are so miniscule they could serve as an ice skater's skirt or swim trunks. Likewise, you will never see me wear heels so high that I need the assistance of others just to maintain my balance in them (i.e. Lady Gaga).     

In addition to this, there are only so many picture variations one can do before it feels like, "Is anybody else as bored with this as I am?" Even among very popular people on social media, who actually know how to dress and pose for pictures (unlike me), after a while it becomes way less exciting.

As far as the potato sack dress and Birkies, a certain staff member at one of the institutions I frequent wears such attire pretty much daily, but she is also fabulously overweight. I cannot say that I would do any better, given those circumstances. It may not be fair or just, but I will say that it's much easier to dress nicely when you're thin.

[pebblesf]

On 10/23/2024 at 8:49 PM, Gige said:

First, as always, thanks for the compliments! It is great to know that others appreciate the effort I make to always present myself as being well-put-together.

I tend to believe that there is only so much one can say on any given topic no matter how well versed s/he may be about it. Likewise, we tend to get tired of focusing on the same topic time and time again. A few years ago I completed my studies for my Masters degree and was strongly encouraged to pursue a doctorate. Spending up to four years of my life on a single focus, however, was just about as appealing as eating dirt. I feel the same about any subject - there is a time when I need to take a break from it if I can say or learn no more about it. This even applies to heels - there is only so much one can say about it. 

Yes, I am very attuned to both taste and style so that I always present myself in a professional manner. Whereas yesterday's outfit was a skirt and boots, that which I wore today consisted of black kitten heel pumps, black pants, a black and white striped sweater, and a black cardigan. Not at all to disparage her, I felt as if I took my outfit cues from a casual day for Vice President Harris. I think attire standards have sunk so low in recent years that there is no longer a line between casual/comfort and anything else. I recently conducted an interview of an individual who was the target of an investigation and asked a newly hired colleague to join me for such. I told her that the boss wants us in professional attire for such activities but leaves it up each individual to determine what form that takes. My colleague arrived wearing an oversized shirt dress and Birkenstock sandals. I had to stop and shake my head in disbelief that anyone could think that such an outfit could remotely passes for more than 'lounging around the house' attire. Despite being "out" at the time of this interview, I still wore a dress shirt and a tie. I am all for higher heels and hemlines but, again, within reason. You will never see me wearing skirts/short that are so miniscule they could serve as an ice skater's skirt or swim trunks. Likewise, you will never see me wear heels so high that I need the assistance of others just to maintain my balance in them (i.e. Lady Gaga).      

Thank you so kindly for the compliment(s) - always greatly appreciated. I tend to think that confidence is like a snowball on a hill - once it gets started, it will be become bigger and bigger until it comes to a stop. Once a little confidence is built and the person is will to keep building it, it will continue to grow stronger and stronger. As this point I have such a "who cares" disposition that it may be frightening to some. I am not at all "in your face" about it but more of a notice if you will and think what you want - I really do not care about either. I have always wondered about how many men I see who are secretly envious of us. 

ORD holds a very special place with me - I have traveled in and out of that airfield so many times. In fact, all of my recent international flights have been from and back to ORD even though I live much closer to STL. If I left STL for an international destination, chances are that I would have to transfer at ORD. If you are ever in Chicago for a while, make an outreach and I will see what I can do. I can not promise I can get there as I have very limited free time from work. I am, however, willing to give it a try if possible. 

So you are much closer to STL?  Occasionally layover there as well.  D

[Gige]

2 minutes ago, pebblesf said:

So you are much closer to STL?  Occasionally layover there as well.  D

Yep, about 90 minutes from STL compared to 3.5hrs to ORD. 

[pebblesf]

Just now, Gige said:

Yep, about 90 minutes from STL compared to 3.5hrs to ORD. 

Cool!  Always looking for new bootbuds to hang with!

[Shyheels]

On 10/24/2024 at 1:49 AM, Gige said:

First, as always, thanks for the compliments! It is great to know that others appreciate the effort I make to always present myself as being well-put-together.

I tend to believe that there is only so much one can say on any given topic no matter how well versed s/he may be about it. Likewise, we tend to get tired of focusing on the same topic time and time again. A few years ago I completed my studies for my Masters degree and was strongly encouraged to pursue a doctorate. Spending up to four years of my life on a single focus, however, was just about as appealing as eating dirt. I feel the same about any subject - there is a time when I need to take a break from it if I can say or learn no more about it. This even applies to heels - there is only so much one can say about it. 

Yes, I am very attuned to both taste and style so that I always present myself in a professional manner. Whereas yesterday's outfit was a skirt and boots, that which I wore today consisted of black kitten heel pumps, black pants, a black and white striped sweater, and a black cardigan. Not at all to disparage her, I felt as if I took my outfit cues from a casual day for Vice President Harris. I think attire standards have sunk so low in recent years that there is no longer a line between casual/comfort and anything else. I recently conducted an interview of an individual who was the target of an investigation and asked a newly hired colleague to join me for such. I told her that the boss wants us in professional attire for such activities but leaves it up each individual to determine what form that takes. My colleague arrived wearing an oversized shirt dress and Birkenstock sandals. I had to stop and shake my head in disbelief that anyone could think that such an outfit could remotely passes for more than 'lounging around the house' attire. Despite being "out" at the time of this interview, I still wore a dress shirt and a tie. I am all for higher heels and hemlines but, again, within reason. You will never see me wearing skirts/short that are so miniscule they could serve as an ice skater's skirt or swim trunks. Likewise, you will never see me wear heels so high that I need the assistance of others just to maintain my balance in them (i.e. Lady Gaga).      

Thank you so kindly for the compliment(s) - always greatly appreciated. I tend to think that confidence is like a snowball on a hill - once it gets started, it will be become bigger and bigger until it comes to a stop. Once a little confidence is built and the person is will to keep building it, it will continue to grow stronger and stronger. As this point I have such a "who cares" disposition that it may be frightening to some. I am not at all "in your face" about it but more of a notice if you will and think what you want - I really do not care about either. I have always wondered about how many men I see who are secretly envious of us. 

ORD holds a very special place with me - I have traveled in and out of that airfield so many times. In fact, all of my recent international flights have been from and back to ORD even though I live much closer to STL. If I left STL for an international destination, chances are that I would have to transfer at ORD. If you are ever in Chicago for a while, make an outreach and I will see what I can do. I can not promise I can get there as I have very limited free time from work. I am, however, willing to give it a try if possible. 

As a freelance who works from home I can dress as I please - and could if I wanted to sit around all day in my pyjamas, as a lot if people did during the pandemic. I always try to make an effort if for no other reason than to remind myself I am at work, and so create an at work vibe. I have found that wearing heels is really helpful in this regard. It’s like the foundation. You feel you need to live up to your footwear - at least in a smart casual sense. I have my faucet dress code as it were - nothing flashy at all, just nice heels, jeans, shirt or jumper. 

[Gige]

On 11/8/2024 at 1:39 AM, Shyheels said:

As a freelance who works from home I can dress as I please - and could if I wanted to sit around all day in my pyjamas, as a lot if people did during the pandemic. I always try to make an effort if for no other reason than to remind myself I am at work, and so create an at work vibe. I have found that wearing heels is really helpful in this regard. It’s like the foundation. You feel you need to live up to your footwear - at least in a smart casual sense. I have my faucet dress code as it were - nothing flashy at all, just nice heels, jeans, shirt or jumper. 

I have come to start embracing this approach. My job is a "hybrid" meaning that I can work from either home or at the office as need dictates. Right now, I do a 2-3 schedule in that I am at home on Mondays & Fridays, and at the office Tuesdays - Thursday. I find that at home, I am more inclined to "throw on whatever" and go with it rather than take any time to put together a nice outfit - it's all done in laziness. My wife has long been a proponent of the "dress for work," even at home" because it does much to promote a professional mindset.  She has, understandably complained about those who show up to video meetings in bathrobes. I could not agree with you more - live up to your footwear is my approach to every outfit I put together. That which I wear MUST coordinate with my footwear or else it just will not work for me. 

 

[Shyheels]

We seem to be very much alike in our approach. I always dress for work, starting with heels and picking out something that works with them. In my case, since I live on a narrowboat on the canals - not in a marina or boatyard, but as a continuous cruiser moving along the network, working locks and swing bridges and mooring along muddy towpaths, my clothes are of the more hard-wearing sort - jeans and jumpers and boots. On days when I am moving the boat I don't wear heels - but I do wear nice leather knee boots. But when I am moored and working - writing stories - I am nearly always in heels. And  I make sure that my jeans and jumpers and dress shirts make a presentable appearance.

 

 

t

[HappyinHeels]

Gige,

Thanks for trusting in us to hear your story and get to know you. It is surprising how much we have in common like our choice to also wear things from the other side of the aisle. Your connection to O’Hare Airport made me smile as I worked at Terminal 5 with INS/CBP for 16 years. Finally, my mother was born and raised in Springfield and much of immediate family resides in the city near Jerome. I have many childhood memories of trips down US66/I-55 between Chicago and Springfield starting in the mid-sixties. 
I live 250 miles/400 km from Springfield in SE Wisconsin. Thanks again for sharing and please keep posting. Our forum always needs new faces and voices. HinH