hhdude159 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 After looking over some posts that some of you guys made over heeling in public, I decided to try one myself. So before I go, any advice?
Charlie Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 For that confidence building first time out, go with something a little conservative and wear a long flair-legged jean that covers the heels. The most important thing is to be nonchalant about it. If you're confident, that's really all you need. You'll see how little people actually pay attention. If a guy spots them, (rare) then you can be reasonably assured that he wishes he had the balls you have. If a girl does, they're usually pretty cool about it. Take it up a notch or two at your own pace until you get to where you want to be. It's not hard. Good luck! Charlie Everything I say is a lie!.......I'm lying
jmc Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 We don't know if you have a heel collection already or if you are just starting out. Either way, I can come up with a few pointers -- if you haven't purchased shoes yet, keep these in mind as you shop: 1). Start with a pair of heels in which you feel most comfortable. These will probably be something fairly bland and conservative. You are "breaking the ice" here, the tricks your mind will be playing on you will be enough challenge for you. If you have a choice between a pair of 6-inch stilettos and 3-inch wedges, definitely go for the wedges on your first outing. A block style heel will also work in place of a wedge. Blocks and wedges tend to be more stable on uneven terrain, allowing you to concentrate more on what you are doing rather than "Wow, I'm wearing heels!" Oddly enough, the idea is to get to the point where your heels are so natural you don't realize you are wearing them. 2). Height is exciting but on your first outing, go for something you know you can handle with confidence. Those 5-inchers are real beauties but you have enough on your mind wearing heels in public. 3-inchers are heels too, and you can act naturally wearing them. 3). Walk with confidence, don't pussy-foot around. Hold your head high and stride with purpose -- you are wearing HEELS! Heels command attention and you should too! Have a happy time!
hhdude159 Posted July 7, 2009 Author Posted July 7, 2009 Yea thats true, my shoe collection is not that big. In fact, its rather small. Only 1 pair of heels but I love it. 1. O man, I might lose confidence quickly since I do not like heels with wedges or blocks. I am thinking of either wearing a dress sandal or a pump on my 1st day. 2. I guess think of a place where I can handle in public while wearing heels. 3. O boy, I am going to need that confidence. I am not even sure if I can walk properly as I do not have alot of confidence while walking on them.
HappyFeat Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 Wow, Charlie and jmc offer wonderful advice! If my advice seems redundant, please forgive me. For any outing, you should consider the entire outfit and build that outfit based on the heels that you choose. Heeling (at least for me) isn't just about throwing on a pair of pumps and heading out the door - it is about fashion and style. Well coordinated colors and nicely fitting clothes that are appropriate for the outfit make a big difference. As for the outfit, it should be something you are comfortable wearing. Don't choose a suit for example if you rarely wear one. The overall look should be natural and comfortable, but also must be appropriate for the heels and will have more fun than you imagined possible. I suggest that you go to someplace familiar. It does not have to be some place you go often, but choose a place you know where the exits are, where to park, etc. For me, this just helps me feel a bit more in control of my outing as well as feeling safer. I think if you know what to expect as far as where you are going, it allows you to focus on heeling and not finding things. Also, I like places where people may be a bit more progressive in their thinking and thus have more potential of being accepting of a guy in heels. In my experiences, people will notice you. No matter how you try to go under the radar, people will notice you. You can minimize the likelihood of people noticing, however you are likely not going to eliminate it. However, not everybody you see or interact with will notice, no matter what you wear. This is one of the reasons that I like to have a nice outfit from top to bottom. When I am noticed I want the heels to look as natural as possible as a part of my outfit. Though people notice, they very seldom react. For me the vast number of reactions are either nonchalant or positive. I have caught a few snickers, but that is by no means a big deal. However as I said above, you will be shocked at simply how many people either don't notice or who don't give it a second thought when they do. One thing to avoid is bringing extra attention to yourself by trying to avoid people noticing. A guy wearing heels is out of the ordinary to say the least. If it weren't none of us would be apprehensive. Heck, this section of the forum wouldn't probably even exist. This apprehensiveness leads to what I think of as "hiding in the shadows." I admit I have done it. It is changing your course when walking, standing behind things until to avoid people, excessive nervousness, rushed behavior, etc. It is something that I think everybody goes through and has to go through. In the end, it only draws attention and not positive attention. Just pay attention if you are not behaving naturally and try to correct it. For your first outing, I also suggest that you make it short. When I started heeling, I would wear my heels when I bought gas. At first, I would just pay at the pump. Then I build up to going into the station. After a while I started chatting with the clerks and finally I became very comfortable in that situation when heeling. I used this strategy in several different situations and places. One of my first heeling experiences was simply going into the post office to buy stamps. I wore gold pumps (yes gold, I know) and a pair of long linen trousers. When I left, after standing in line with about a dozen people, bought my stamps, etc. I felt like I had just walked on the moon. Short outings in safe places is how I built a lot of my confidence. All of this brings me back to my original point. Just wear your heels like you were born to wear them - like it is as natural as rain. There is little to fear, though you will likely think of some things. If you go naturally, you have nothing to worry about. Style is built from the ground up!
Bubba136 Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 I agree, KH....I don't believe anyone would be able to do a better job. I know I couldn't. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
Dawn HH Posted July 7, 2009 Posted July 7, 2009 HHDude159:-) I couldn't agree more with Charlie and JMC, and as for Happyfeat's treatice---It couldn't have been said better. There is a lot of good advice here for you to think about and ponder. And I'll add another piece to the puzzle. Practice a lot at home and in your yard until you can wear your heels well inside and out on other pavements and terrain. Then you will have the confidence and experience to go heeling out in public and have a ball doing it. Don't forget to check that outfit in a full length mirror before going out and if you are satisfied with your looks, then you are ready to tackle the world in heels. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
HappyFeat Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 DawnHH, excellent advice about all terrain heeling. I will never forget the first time I ruined a heel when it slipped between cracks in bricks or the first time I sunk in grass and had to dig the mud off my new stilettos. Kneehighs, the only problem with a definitive guide to public heeling is that the entire market for such a tome is already here. I have given some thought to starting a blog here at HHPlace, but that idea is a work in progress. As for my freestyling knowledge, much of it has been learned from reading posts here at HHPlace by members such as yourself and the many others who dare to explore. I do add my own creative twists, afterall I am far from afraid o trying new and daring things...Lord knows. However, I am always open to collaboration. Heck maybe a book is a good idea, just for the book tour...and maybe meeting Oprah. Style is built from the ground up!
gwl1 Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 Seriously, HappyFeat and KneeHighs, you two should definitly collaborate on a book. It's a great idea, it would help our cause, and I am sure it would sell a zillion to make the bestseller list. Let me no if you need a editer. I'm wel qualified and quiet wiling to doit. LOL GWL
Dawn HH Posted July 8, 2009 Posted July 8, 2009 Oprah? Hmmmm! Who knows where a book deal would lead. Just think, a signed copy from the author or authors. I'd buy a copy for sure. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
vector Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 hhdude159, Yet another piece of street heeling advice. If you normally wear 5" inside, I would recommend starting out with 3" (or 4" max) when outside. No matter how crazy it sounds, wearing heels inside is VERY different (and much less challenging) than wearing heels outside.
Thighboots2 Posted July 9, 2009 Posted July 9, 2009 Vector, excellent advice which I endorse. I would also advise against thin heels as total confidence is essential on the first few outings. Even now after many years heeling, if I am not careful where I place my heel, I can have a wobble on a nice big 3" block heel just because I stood on a large stone. This upsets the balance and you can easily fall off the heel, and that is something you do not want to happen. 3" block/cuban heels are an excellent starting point for getting out and about in heels as these really do not cause anyone to stare. Reserve the higher/thinner heels for partying - just like the girls. Simon. Are you confusing me with someone who gives a damn?
kikepa Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 After looking over some posts that some of you guys made over heeling in public, I decided to try one myself. So before I go, any advice? Yes - Enjoy yourself! Beyond that, everything else is fluff. Those who really care about us don't make a fuss about what we wear. Those who make a fuss about what we wear really don't care about us.
JeffB Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 Well, I can't add anything more than has already been mentioned by HappyFeat and others, so all I can say is to be calm, be collected, dress appropriately for your surroundings, walk your head high and, most of all, act like you belong, regardless of wherever you happen to travel. I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!
Dawn HH Posted July 11, 2009 Posted July 11, 2009 I completely concur with what the last 3 posters have said and the only thing that I an add is this. Please be alert when decending stairs or stepping off of curbs. It is so easy to catch your heel on the edge of the curb or step. Remember that you can easily catch your fall on stairs by using the hand railing, but there is nothing for you to grab when stepping off of a curb. Also remember that all curbs are not the same height, and all streets don't have the same paving material to land on. It's no fun being sprawled out in the middle of the street while wearing heels. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
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