What defines "girlie"?

[sabotalot]

I've often worn "original" footwear since the late 70's (yes, I'm a geezer at 51). But what defines gender-appropriate style? In those days, though on their way out, 4" platforms were o.k. (thank-you Tony Orlando,) I went to the men's department to get similar styles. It's just that enough of us guys have to pick up on a particular style at the same time. HHPLACE gives us a chance to do this. I was sorry to see that the resurgance of clogs in the late '90's was grounded. No matter; they are still available, thanks to the Internet. Until I found the many vendors that offer them on the internet, I was getting by with 3 very-worn pairs from years ago. Looking forward to Ohio in October, if not sooner. If you live in Ohio, anything more radical than penny-loafers is treated with disdain.

[thedesigner]

well to my mind, nothing it gender specific. Girls wear builders boots, cowboy boots aka cowgirl boots, blokes jeans, suits, and we dont think theyre lesbians.... so we can wear heels as suitable and if they fit without any bother.... to me its just personality and fun.... ive only had positive comments from women, whose opinion is more important to me than mens... girlie blokes? same as blokey girls ! not sexist, just one equates to the other !!

[fastfreddy2]

Hmmm.

Stimulating question.

As a kick off to an answer, how about "anything in pink"?

Anything with a superfine (stiletto) heel?

I personally would say anything "sandals" with heels. [it's only an opinion. ]

Any good?

....

[ShockQueen]

Hmmm...what defines "girlie"? I'd say other people's perceptions, as when I wear heels, as has been said many times, they're not "manly" or "girly" - they're MINE. HAR!

[Griez]

welll many ppl think that girlie is to wear corset, i dont, i like it so do with heels also

[sabotalot]

A part of the answer (and this is not original) has to be the retort to "aren't those women's shoes?", to which I say "No, they are mine". Proudly wearing clogs, about half of the time they are HH. I just noticed that I am echoing Shockqueen's feelings, too. Looking forward to getting together with all who share my feelings.

[johnieheel]

In my opinion girlie is - pink,flowers,bows,and articals of that nature. Would be the same as a woman wearing mens work boots or jeans. Women don't care if you notice or address the clothing they wear as men or womens so why should it matter to us guys? You want to wear pink, flowers or bows on your shoes, then so be it but understand one thing. There are going to be remarks made much more that if you wear plain black heels with jeans. Thats just the way it is.

[shus]

What defines "girlie" to me is thin straps on sandals, shoes and boots

[Histiletto]

The label of things change depending on those who perceive it. For instance, the word "gay" has a whole different connotation than it started out with. You know the background of heels from the 16th century. Alot of jobs can no longer be catagorized under a man's or a woman's, because both have integrated the others workforce. Even the home life isn't always having the man as the bread winner for a few men have chosen the position of Mr. mom while the wife has the ability to bring in the financial support needed.

Up untill the 1940's, some of the playwear that boys and girls could wear was the same basic clothing, which included a cap, shirt, trousers, high tops or for dressier occassions the Mary Jane styled shoes. Somehow, adult groups got convinced that there should be more of a division in what the children should be able to wear, due to the ideas of sissifying or tomboying children. Therefore, this started the movement that boys couldn't wear anything of what a girl was allowed and the girls were also suppose to not wear the male identity in proper circles. Well, here we are six decades later. Women have crossed that line without hardly a raised eyebrow and men haven't had the mind or guts to challenge this inequality, because they don't want to bring to light the true identity of the male persona. Instead we have the programmed social ideals of what being "the man" is, which neglects the softer (feminine) talents and abilities of most men.

O.K., I have stepped on my soap box again. I have also entertained the thought that men are "the manly ideal" society has standardized, but there are enough of us to know some men have the desire to wear high heels too. So, society is still not acknowledging the versatile beings people are.

So to define "girlie", I would have to say it is the actions of a female. Likewise, "boyish" would be the actions of a male. This doesn't mean they both can't do the same thing. It's just that they both have the ability to do the same action or display. Preventing them from achieving their abilities is stopping them from being the best at who they are. Therefore, you will get substandard outputs by forcing them to hide the parts of what makes them tick. A mind occupied with secrets can't give a full measure of concern to other things at all times. As a result, the best may not be achieved or even thought of, limiting the possiblities for the best outcome.

[sabotalot]

It gripes me that people judge you by attite. If I want to wear something out of the ordinary, that should not make me "eccentric". etc. We are here to experience life, in a variety of ways. How we clothe ourselves should be secondary. For example, if kilts ever become common in the U.S., I will enjoy the unrestricted freedom that they produce. But now, I would receive many guffaws for wearing them, although I can wear a pair of Bermuda shorts, which differ only in the sense that they are stitched in the middle without problem. Have worn a skirt publically with no problems, but find that the freedom in footwear situation keeps me satisfied, particularlly open-back footwear, especially HH clogs. I can't believe that I wear 'em, but I do, and have had no negative feedback. If not in HH clogs, am in open back Bastads, and feel better for it. My HH's frequently are Kohl's "Bongo" style, discontinued, but are just enough out-of-the-ordinary to be pleasing. Since coming here, I have lost 15 pounds. Although I am still slightly chubby, I think that the endorphins produced by wearing my favorite stuff has helped me a bunch.

[fastfreddy2]

....snip.....

the freedom in footwear situation keeps me satisfied, particularlly open-back footwear, especially HH clogs. I can't believe that I wear 'em, but I do, and have had no negative feedback. If not in HH clogs, am in open back Bastads, and feel better for it. My HH's frequently are Kohl's "Bongo" style, discontinued, but are just enough out-of-the-ordinary to be pleasing.

Since coming here, I have lost 15 pounds. Although I am still slightly chubby, I think that the endorphins produced by wearing my favorite stuff has helped me a bunch.

I've found the desire to walk in heels, has me out walking at times I wouldn't normally consider attractive, like when the weather is cold or wet. I've even walked home in 4" heels while there was ice underfoot. I may well be out later, and it's raining at the moment...... [Rain has hardly stopped here since October 2007.]

I've lost weight, and inches off my waistline. A small change in diet has helped, but the exercise has been good for me.

Never has exercise seemed so pleasurable.

But .... (back on thread)

Skirts are undeniably 'girlie'.... So are some styles of shoe.

I don't know there is actually a difference between; declaring a certain style of shoe is "not normally aligned to a gender" and wearing them, and wearing a girls shoe as a 'freestyle' fashion?

Untimately I don't feel it matters what term is used for whatever footwear a wearer chooses as suitable footwear. The 'acid test' is going to be whether those not directly involved -the audience- allow them to be worn without abusing the wearer.

I'm happy to say I wear girls HH shoes. I wear styles that fit, and styles I can get away with for street-healing. This means strappy stiletto's are out.

......

[anakin_heel]

I have been wondering if these are too girly, what do you all think?

http://www.aldoshoes.com/eng/storeSection/redirect.cfm?sectionID=b2c/style/productDetails.cfm&itemID=68506972&&var=d&ckey=CA&colorid=96

[crotchboots-m]

oh,christ...who cares? if you like,wear it. and if you dont have the balls too,then go running home crying for yo mama.... you all act like your looking into the that stupid talking mirror from snow white....

[mccar7hy]

uh, I would say heels are girlie, but yeah, who cares

[Bootking]

you all act like your looking into the that stupid talking mirror from snow white....

Mirror mirror on the wall......

I couldn't stop laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mikeheel]

Funny thing is...if you are going to get perplexed, because somebody thinks you are weird, for breaking the 'rules' then what difference does it make how 'pink' 'spikey' or 'flowery' the shoes are. If you have high heels on, make them as high as you feel is practical, if height is your thing. My logic is that if you are going to wear high heels then the most important thing to do is CO-ORDINATE THE OUTFIT ...have a definate 'look'. This idea that fine stilleto heels are for girls only is nonsense. For instance ... Have a 'goth' look in mind? Keep it all black, nicely cut shirt with detail, tight trousers with detail...buttons maybe down the seam? Use a little eye shadow ,maybe lips if you really want the goth thing, but here's my point....wear some oxford shoe-boots with 5" spikes and you have a look that works. #

[Bootking]

I'm not into goth but that is an interesting idea!

[mikeheel]

Well I have discovered that, although goths look sinister,they are charming and warm, peaceful people who accept whats on the 'inside' and embrace our liberal ideas about 'rules'. I am not 'into' it as such but the spikey theme is co-ordinated. I think this is critical. If you are worried about sending signals that say 'I wish I was a woman' then carry some stubble or a short beard. NOTHING GIRLIE ABOUT THAT !! M

[gwl1]

Hey, Crotchboots, go easy on Anakin_Heels. He's a new member, only posted twice. Don't flame or bash him. Welcome him with a smile and be polite. He's probably nervous and inexperienced, and may not have the confidence that you and others possess in pushing the envelope. I thought your comeback was impolite and uncalled for. This board is supposed to be a support group, and your response was anything but supportive. I would like to see you apologize. To Anakin_Heels: I'm sorry your inquiry post was met with such disdain, but to the question you posed, you will get as many different opinions as there are members who reply. "Girlie" is in the eye of the beholder. If you like those shoes, wear them. Your opinion is the only one that counts. My opinion, for what it's worth and that's not much, is that they're not too girlie, but they're way too flat (for me). I prefer heels, as do most of the guys on this forum (which might have something to do with the name "High Heel Place."). Anyway, welcome to the forum and don't be afraid to post again. GWL

[crotchboots-m]

i apoligize to anakin if i was harsh. but i get tired of the whiney crying of those that want to be fashion/fetish pioneers without having to be brave about it. just cant be done,i am afraid. besides,the girlie label is given by those without any clue about the situation anyways.

[billyb]

I have been thinking about this and one thing that keeps comming up is that thin or stiletto heels are girlie. The company I work for has many women in several key positions, one lady is the SVP of operations and the only two people above her are the two owners. I have been at 3 differnt meeting where she was involved and all 3 time she was wearing buisness skirts and matching 4" stiletto heels two pairs were pointed toe and one pair were almond toe. Beleve me she was totally in charge of those meeting and I don't think any one of twenty or so people were thinking she looks girlie.(she looked really nice but not girlie..) I think that what defines girlie is more the person than the cloths or shoes, I have seen men in all male clothing that looked girlie. On the flip side if a women can be in nice buisness cloths and heels and look professional, then if a man is in buisness cloths and wanted to wear heels then why is that odd or even girlie?

[crotchboots-m]

because all the sheep would freak out,run around baaaabaaaaing and the shepherd and dog would have work overtime raising the price of gas another dollar a barrel.

[fastfreddy2]

Okay, NOTHING is girlie.

Therefore, skirts, stockings, bra's, pencil thin heels are all masculine.

Black, is of course, white.

I'll say it again .... NOTHING is girlie. End of debate.

[Now, I've been a good boy. Will someone loosen the straps on my jacket please?]

...

[lorriette]

girlie is a persons perception. Take any group of people, and they will come up with different views, many the same or similar. To that group, the similar views define girlie. The individual will define what they consider girlie, but since the choice is "do I want to wear this/these"?, the term girlie need not enter the equation. It doesn't in my case anyhow.

[fastfreddy2]

girlie is a persons perception. Take any group of people, and they will come up with different views, many the same or similar. To that group, the similar views define girlie. The individual will define what they consider girlie, but since the choice is "do I want to wear this/these"?, the term girlie need not enter the equation.

It doesn't in my case anyhow.

In many respects I agree.

I choose what is suitable for me too, BUT I do that being a member of a community that also chooses to assert where its guidelines are. Of course I can ignore them if I want to, and I know some pioneers do.

But anyone telling me wearing makeup (for example) isn't "girlie" or worse it's masculine, is frankly, just not being honest with themselves or anyone else....

I own stiletto shoes (and boots). I believe thay are "girlie" because outside of CD/Fetish/HH meets, that is the only gender I've ever seen wearing them. I still wear them, despite believeing they are "girl" attire. Does it give me sleepless nights? No. Why should it?

This is (mostly) true of makeup, skirts, bra's, and a whole list of other items.

I'd expect we all know what the colour pink looks like. 20, or even 200 people here can claim it's a red-white, or a white-red, but to the rest of the planet; it's pink.

I wear girls shoes. So what?

Me, and several hundred supporters couldn't hope to turn around 3,000 years of cultural development in Europe that has culminated in the creation of the stiletto heel ~ for women. I'm not even going to try. I wish it were different, but it isn't and I'm not inclined to be a martyr to the cause.

I'm going to carry on wearing girls shoes. Not because I believe them to be asexual attire, but because I like wearing them. If I start to buy HH in mens shops, then I'll have to think again about whether I consider them 'girlie' or not. But I think I'll be buying tickets for ice skating from Satan before I'll need to do that.....

...

[HeelD]

Not sure why we're talking about bras here because they, unlike heels, serve a practical pupose - offering support for womens breasts and last time I checked men don't have those unless they're overweight or changing sex. Sure men can wear them if the wish, but we all know men will wear them for other reasons rather them having any practical purpose. Women and men could stop wearing heels tomorrow because they have no practical purpose but bras are a bit different IMO.

[roniheels]

In my opinion girlie is - pink,flowers,bows,and articals of that nature.

Would be the same as a woman wearing mens work boots or jeans.

Women don't care if you notice or address the clothing they wear as men or womens so why should it matter to us guys?

You want to wear pink, flowers or bows on your shoes, then so be it but understand one thing. There are going to be remarks made much more that if you wear plain black heels with jeans. Thats just the way it is.

Johnie is right on the mark. I agree with all of that. I wear feminine high heels with men's suits. I don't think that gives the impression of being "girlie." It might cause some confusion or food for thought, but not totally a feminine image.

[fastfreddy2]

Johnie is right on the mark. I agree with all of that. I wear feminine high heels with men's suits. I don't think that gives the impression of being "girlie." It might cause some confusion or food for thought, but not totally a feminine image.

Exactly so.

Wearing "girlie" attire, doesn't make you a girl. Nor does it need to make you appear girlie either. I think heels under a suit is a stunning idea!

Girl's wearing trousers, not wearing make-up, not wearing heels, and not wearing a bra [] doesn't automatically make a woman masculine either.

HeelD:

I'm being COMPLETELY flippant here BTW.....

So why do you wear a bra?

"Because breasts need to be supported."

This is largely a myth: "...wearing a bra... has no medical necessity whatsoever", says Susan M. Love, M.D in her "Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book". Breasts were fine before the invention of brasserie.

Source link:

Bra's aren't worn in South America, large parts of Africa, most of China and much of the Far East. In fact bra's are a recent Western device. [Just like the stilletto heel.]

...

[paul.a.j]

i wondered when bras would get a mention..... girlie for me is pink, pretty, lace, sheer, floral, pastel - all those things, i guess strappy, pointy too. how about some women join the discussion and tell us what they think is girlie. that would be good - an open invitation to you girls!

[canadianbeaver17]

Hate to go back, but I've been off for a few days...Anyways anakin_heel, those shoes aren't too girlie. I got a pair like them and they are VERY comfy. When people say them, I just normally get something like "oh man I got some like that and they are so comfy!"