chip7X Posted February 23, 2002 Posted February 23, 2002 I've NEVER met a guy who is into high heels and is also GAY. Most crossdressers aren't gay. A transexual doesn't count either coz they consider themselves as a woman trapped in a man's body. Anyway! How many times have you been asked about your sexuality. "A man thats into high heels,..are you gay? I personally think its a stupid question. What do you think?
Firefox Posted February 23, 2002 Posted February 23, 2002 I'm the same. I have never met anyone who is into heels and gay, and I have met loads of guys from this site in the flesh too. I know a couple of gay guys in real life as well. Wearing heels is the LAST thing they would do. If anyone thinks otherwise, they are pretty ignorant of the true facts.
ShockQueen Posted February 23, 2002 Posted February 23, 2002 Actually, some of my friends who are gay here in Denver wear heels some of the time. It depends on what you are into, I guess. SQ.....still busting societal molds with a smile...and a 50-ton sledge!
Firefox Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 What sort of heels do they wear and how do they dress SQ? I'm kind of interested in that because if there was a gay stereotype here in my expereience, it would be tight jeans, white shirt, earrings, very short/shaven hair and trainers. I hate stereotypes, but that's the image I have and it would be nice to blur it.
Calv Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 I've had one or two implied comments from a colleague at work - who used to be a punk rocker about wearing "wussy shoes". I've seen this sort of thread on other boards, and the feeling amongst the great unwashed public seems to be that if you dare to be different you are automatically gay. I think personally it may have something to do with people seeing drag queens who do seem to be gay and who parody women and we who are different get "put in the same box". Any other thoughts? Do your own thing. Don't be a victim of conformity. Calv
Calv Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 Another little story on this subject came up last night in the pub. My friend with whom I own the buses, works for Leicester City Council and was recently inducting an assistant to his department. Being in the public sector today political correctness is very important..... And so when the sublect of Gay/Lesbian was covered Martin was somewhat disparaging. Only later did he find out that his assistant was gay - whoops! I think the figures show that about 10% of the population are gay? Do your own thing. Don't be a victim of conformity. Calv
Bob Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 Firefox On the subject of stereotypes, a friend of mine who is gay falls into the jeans/t-shire/shaven head category, although he doesn't wear earrings! Strange how people tend to wear uniforms and consider those who dress differently at best odd Man is born in freedom, but soon becomes enslaved, in cages of convention from the cradle to the grave - Jeff Waynes War Of The Worlds/Sung by David Essex
Francis Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 stereotypes are wondeful things. they let us realise just how wrong we can be and of our misconceptions of others. if you think of a type of person without having a mental image associated with them, then you are clearly more enlightened than most. I admit to holding a few stereotypes myself, but when I meet that type of person the image fades to grey.
terayon Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 im not gay, ive never met anyone who was gay (or at least openly gay), yet i know at school people always call people gay..."that shirt is gay!" "your gay!" "i cant believe you failed that test, how gay!" and so on....it is a massive stereotype that anything thats different is gay
Bob Posted February 24, 2002 Posted February 24, 2002 It seems that to be enlightened is to be in the smallest minority, but then, how many of us can really call ourselves enlightened? I certainly wouldn't consider myself enlightened. Maybe one day we'll all exorcise our demons and preconceptions, untill then we have boards like this on Man is born in freedom, but soon becomes enslaved, in cages of convention from the cradle to the grave - Jeff Waynes War Of The Worlds/Sung by David Essex
Yamyam Posted February 25, 2002 Posted February 25, 2002 Up here in t' frozen Midlands, and other places in my experience, 'gay' is just a generic term of abuse, especially for anyone even slightly different. I have a (small) standing joke along the lines of "In the Midlands, a gay man is one who prefers women to football" . But no-one's ever shouted anything at me. Actually, given what I look like, the kind of people who'd shout abuse at me are probably trying to sort out whether to shout homophobic or racist abuse first. But as long as they keep quiet, I don't mind . Obsessed is such a strong word. I prefer to think of myself as "differently enthusiastic"
Tacchi Alti Posted February 26, 2002 Posted February 26, 2002 My wife's first fear was that I was gay, but she's now reassured on that point!! It shows how stereotyped people's views are - I suppose it's conditioning. Yes, schoolkids are terribly cruel! 'Come, and trip it as ye go On the light fantastic toe.' John Milton
Firefox Posted February 26, 2002 Posted February 26, 2002 I'd like to add at this point that I've nothing against gay people. I respect their sexuality and would like to see full and equal rights for them including equal age of consent, marital rights, pension rights, legal rights, nationality rights etc. When I roll my eyes at people who confuse alternative fashions with sexuality, that disdain is not directed at gay people, but at the ignorance of the person making the comment. _________________ Believe in your right to wear what you want <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Firefox on 2002-02-26 22:08 ]</font>
Dr. Shoe Posted March 11, 2002 Posted March 11, 2002 Actually, I occassionally dress in a rather camp manner and go to our local Gay club (I'm not gay but could be slightly Bi ). On several occassions I have met gay men in heels (normally stilettos) though they seldom where them outside like I would. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
ShockQueen Posted March 11, 2002 Posted March 11, 2002 Hello Firefox! To answer your question about one of my friends here in Denver, who now lives in San Diego, he always dresses up, even when he's casual. His clothes always make him look wonderful, and he does wear heeled boots at times when he goes out. This picture does not show his heels, but does give you an idea of what he looks like: Dayia in 'boy mode' (Raymond) He is one of my dearest friends and I always learn something of fashion and style from him. SQ.....still busting societal molds with a smile...and a 50-ton sledge!
Firefox Posted March 11, 2002 Posted March 11, 2002 Oh well, that's a new one on me. I suppose I haven't had that much exposure to gay people. I know some of those drag queens are gay but it's a far cry from what I and most of the people here do. Actually, it amuses me slightly that someone like Julian Cleary, despite his camp dress and behaviour never considered wearing anything other than clumpy Doc martins with his weird and wonderful outfits. My mate Kevin, who is openly gay, always wears classic black gents shoes, light colour baggy trousers or trainers. It just goes to show people are like a box of chocolates. You see one thing on the outside, but the centre is quite another. I was never one to judge a book by it's cover, but I suppose some may think differently.
Arctic Posted March 14, 2002 Posted March 14, 2002 How many times have you been asked about your sexuality. "A man thats into high heels,..are you gay? I personally think its a stupid question. What do you think? Well, it ain't particulary bright indeed. I have been shouted at only once actually, but I guess it's a quite common thought. My biggest problem in that respect is my wife, who made that association also immediately when I came out of the closet. And she isn't stupid, has an academic degree, has a high position, makes tons of money, deals with all kind of people sucessfully and keeps her staff happy by being very understanding. But still she freaks out when I try to address this heel thing. She's open minded about everything, but this causes her to shut down every time I bring it up: "I don't want to be married with a gay". End of conversation. Even if I have told her repeatedly that there is nothing that points in that direction. I'm getting pretty tired of this, so if any of you knows a way to get her convinced, I buy you loads of beer Bert What's all the fuss about?
Firefox Posted March 14, 2002 Posted March 14, 2002 Ask her if her wearing of trousers makes her a lesbian? On second thoughts that might not get a very polite response. I'll keep quiet
Firefox Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 I think she's a dead loss Bert. It sounds like she has made her mind up, and certain stubborn people wont listen to logic on some issues. I suppose it depends on how much you value your relationship with her how far you are going to push the issue. I personally couldn't live with someone like her, but I'm not you
terayon Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 id tell her shes a f*cking hypocrit, she can wear mens fashions and not be "gay", but the moment you wear just one small piece of "womens clothes" she automatically shuts you out and calls you gay...what the shit is that! tell her that if you wish, but im not responsible if you spend many nights sleeping on the couch <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: terayon on 2002-03-17 19:34 ]</font>
Bob Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 That, unfortunately, is the trouble with sexual equality today, from the women it is all take, take, take, yet the moment a man tries the same he is immediately branded sexist or worse (when it comes to fashion) is branded as gay! Of course gay means to be extremely happy so i'm happy with that Man is born in freedom, but soon becomes enslaved, in cages of convention from the cradle to the grave - Jeff Waynes War Of The Worlds/Sung by David Essex
Dr. Shoe Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 I often have a similar conversation with Ruth. She's in the habit of wearing my jumpers and I always say (in jest) that if she wears my clothes then I ought to be entitled to wear some of hers! Actually, I wouldn't need to because I have quite a comprehensive wardrobe of skirts, dresses and catsuits not to metion some pretty camp strides as well. All left over from my TV days. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
Firefox Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 I don't know really. I think sexual equality is what we make of it. Plenty of men moan about it, but in actual fact we're are own worst enemies when it comes to being happy with what we wear and the like. If more men would forget theose hang ups, I don't think we'd be having this conversation. Women have had a very rough deal in the past, and I think it's quite possible to use the new enlightened attiutudes in our favour if we so chose.
hoverfly Posted March 17, 2002 Posted March 17, 2002 Your right Fire Fox, men are some times their own worst enemies. Women some time dress up (or allot) just to feel good. I my self has all ways been t-shirts and jeans type of guy. I wore my clothes as more or less in a utility and practical fashion, but I did not have any kind of pride in my appearance. That and they are comfortable. Then I started to wear more dressy, trendy, casual cloths. Daaaaang... don't I look good. Makes me feel good to and they are sill comfortable. Now I know I am handsome, but I get a lot of more glances form women more than ever before when I dress up a little. Now only if I can wear my heels in public I will have completed many of my out fits. Now Bert, your wife said "that she's free to have tighter requirements for me than what the law says" BULL!!! If you can't do the same for a women, then no women can do the same to a man. What I think she is doing is trying to keep the image of you she wants you to be. High heels are not part of it. Keep wearing your high heels, just be concretive on what you wear around her and wear some very nice out fits when you do. Maybe you should not take a bath or a shower for a while? <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: hoverfly on 2002-03-17 23:41 ]</font> Hello, my name is Hoverfly. I’m a high heel addict…. Weeeeeeeeeee! 👠1998 to 2022!
Charlie Posted March 19, 2002 Posted March 19, 2002 Hey Bert, tell her that heels don't make you gay any more than her having all of the right equipment makes her a prostitute. First, I'd install a good heater in the dog house! Charlie _________________ Everything I say is a lie!.......I'm lying <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Charlie on 2002-03-19 01:39 ]</font> Everything I say is a lie!.......I'm lying
Yamyam Posted March 20, 2002 Posted March 20, 2002 I've got to say that I've got some men's clothes in 'non-traditional' colours, such as bright yellow and blue, and purple. I've just done a presentation to twenty people in a purple shirt and no-one's said anything. I like to dress well, and I know that my girlfriend appreciates me making the effort. Personally, I think that fashion for men is what we make it. Let's break out of the box and go for it! Now if I can just take my own advice... Obsessed is such a strong word. I prefer to think of myself as "differently enthusiastic"
hoverfly Posted March 21, 2002 Posted March 21, 2002 I don't know how people feel about purple in the Midlands, but I wear purple shirts, I own three cars, two of them dark purple (Neon and 240sx). I just never placed purple as a gay color. Pink, but not purple. As for bright yellow, I think it's just a color you have to be comfortable in. I see no gay affiliation with that color. Hello, my name is Hoverfly. I’m a high heel addict…. Weeeeeeeeeee! 👠1998 to 2022!
Debbie(HK) Posted March 21, 2002 Posted March 21, 2002 Me neither, but pink Just having a peek Debbie This is a platform free shoe zone!
Firefox Posted March 21, 2002 Posted March 21, 2002 So if pink is not a "guy colour", what colours are not "girl colours" ?
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