Are You Gay or something?

[HeelD]

Crossdresser and Transvestite are technically the same, although the term transvestite is more often used to describe a man who wears between one and a few items of women's clothing, whereas the term crossdresser is usually used to describe a man who dresses as a women, including makeup, nails, etc.

I had to respond as I'm sure it's the other way around:

Crossdresser - someone who wears one or a few items of clothes intended for the opposite sex but doesn't want to be seen as the opposite sex. Wearing high heels can be seen as "crossdressing".

Transvestite - someone who actually wants to pass themselves off as the opposite sex.

[Bubba136]

she says that she's free to have tighter requirements for me than what the law says, pretty much in the same way that it's not illegal not to have a shower for 12 consequetive months.

And, I guess, that's what an "opinion" is!!! Some people stink and don't think anything of it. And, others find it offensive to their noses.

[joenj]

Well, I *_AM*_ Bi , and I have worn my Margo-St. John's Bay women's boots ( 2 1/4" heel ) to work, and to Greenwich Village ( NYC ) . Cheers! --- end ---

[Bubba136]

Hell, anything can be worn in Greenwich Village......or, nothing at all.....and no one would bat an eye. :rofl:

[Magickman]

It happenned tp me, too

Last week, at the Brookside Bar and Grill, in quirky Marine-on-St. Croix, Minnesota, I had stopped in with my woman for a drink. One of the waitresses spotted my heels, and simply asked, "Are you gay?"

I made the usual pro forma denial, but I don't think she believed me. Some folks cannot escape the stereotypical gender segregation of footwear. If she had been wearing paratrooper boots, would I have asked if she was a lesbian?

[Bubba136]

If she had been wearing trousers/slacks/pants, you should have asked her anyway.

[Pam]

IMHO, When someone links the way of dressing with gender, they have some type of unsolved prejudice. At this time in age many, and I mean many, gender specific fashions are in the past. Some examples: earrings, tight clothing, use of all sorts of beauty products, etc. So in my mind I see "alternative" fashion moving towards a more genderless stage. But some people cannot just accept it! (sound more like a rambling than a thought! )

[kneehighs]

Pam--your post sounded insightful to me, not rambling.

Anyway, on Sunday evening I found myself down in the Meat Packing District on 9th Avenue and West 13th. A few years ago, this area used to be permeated with transvestite streetwalkers, sex clubs (hell fire club) and was underdeveloped. How things change so quickly in new york.

This evening I decided to have a drink and a meal at a place called Spice Market. Of course, I was in my black non pleated Zara pants (purchased in Buenos Aires--can't find em here), white t-shirt layered underneath a black GAP waffle textured hoodie--and my favorite 4" pointy toe black pumps.

As the Meatpacking District really brings out the fashion elite, I decided I had to have a corner table on the sidewalk cafe. This way, I really got to take in the sights. Realistically, I'd say that 1/3 women wore pumps. A sight not to be missed if anyone is ever here. Not a peep from anyone about my pumps either.

Anyway, after eating my South East Asian appetizers (Spicy Black Shrimp and Lime Noodles) and relaxing in my heels while enjoying the sidewalk show (of women), I decided to do a little walking around.

Down the road from Spice Market there is a really trendy nightclub called ONE. Bouncers will not let single men in without a woman, nor will they likely allow groups of men in without women. Anyway, as I was watching the door from a distance and analyzing my odds of getting in, (sometimes when I think I hold my right index finger against my chin and cup the rest of my jawbone with my middle finger and thumb) a blonde in beautiful black pointy pumps came up to me...

She took my hand away from my chin and asked, "are you straight or gay?"

"Straight of course, why do you ask?"

"Because this is a gay thing..."and she mirrored what I was doing with my hand.

"I didn't even realize I was doing that, but really you missed something."

She stood within inches of me and said, "What am I missing?"

"It's right in front of your eyes."

"Its not you, because I think you are beautiful"

"Thanks, but your still missing it" and I looked right at my shoes.

"So what are you doing standing out here?"

"I was thinking of going into ONE."

"Well you can't get in alone. Do you want to go in with me?"

Of course I obliged. Not only did we get to skip the line, but I didn't have to pay the standard $30 cover charge. Now when we get in, I thank her and she introduces me to her friend who was also wearing black pointy pumps.

Then I had to turn the topic back to my shoes. Finally, I told her to look at them and the first words out of her mouth were, "they are way too femme. Are you gay?"

"Of course not? Why should women have all the fun?"

"Because if you are wearing shoes like that you must be gay. What do the heels look like. Do they look like mine?"

At that point, I knew she was immediately disqualfied in my book from giving me any positive feedback. So I walked away from her.

She followed me up the platform.

And I asked, "what happened to your friend Lena?" So she found Lena and sent her my way. This first woman was obviously interested in me until she found out about my pumps. No biggie really--I have a serious girlfriend who is a wardrobe stylist in manhattan and was preoccupied this evening.

After that I found another girl dressed in some really cool designer distressed jeans. You know the kind with the back pockets that look like shirt pockets with the little button on them? I complimented her on her jeans and said I liked the back pocket and asked what brand they were. She made a hush motion with her index finger and said, "Sevens" She was also wearing a brown sport jacket and pointy black pumps....a couple more minutes in the conversation passed... Then I said, "My shoes are about as pointy as yours." and held the tip of my pump against hers. She smiled and said, "Yes!" Then I asked , "Do you think they are too femme?" She said, "It depends on the person wearing them. In your case, no." So that was good.

Then I found another girl. She was wearing a black silk cami, distressed designer jeans, and of course, black oblique toe pumps. I told her I was jealous of her shoes. She looked at mine and immediately said, "I like your pointy shoes!"

That was the extent of my conversations with strangers. Pretty harmless really but goes to show that even in this day and age and even in a city as liberal as new york, people will mistakingly assume you are gay if you are wearing heels.

[Pam]

WOW...some story! Hey we were in the same neighborhood! I can almost ensure that we crossed paths I had dinner at Passtisse! I agree, great high heel all around!!!

[Dawn HH]

Pam:-) Were you wearing black pointy-toed stilettos also? Small world, Isn't it? Cheers--- Dawn HH