wood&metal Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I had a lunch date today, such as it was.... Ok, it wasn't that bad... er..maybe it was.... I guess it depends on your point of view.. The girl I was with made a not-so-nice giggle-giggle and comment about another guys shoes while we were having lunch.... I guess his tan and bright red/orange sneakers didn't do it for her... I didn't bring up guys in heels today...No... Given her reaction to something "different", I figure I already knew her answer to that idea... So, Thank You to the guy in the tan and bright red/orange sneakers, who ever you are... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
heelguy Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 I think her *giggle-giggle* at the man in the bright red/orange sneakers was no reason not to mention the fact that you wear high heels, you should have arrived on the date wearing a pair! that would have really thrown her in the deep end. People judge people they don't know or people who aren't in close proximity to them. Also, the feeling towards the person in question come into affect, for example.. She may have been laughing at this guy for his tan and shoe choice, but if she was genuinely interested and keen to find out more about you, then im sure you would get no such reaction if you told her straight up about your heels anyway, better luck for next time!
Dr. Shoe Posted November 14, 2010 Posted November 14, 2010 Perhaps whe was giggling because he was such a poser? Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
wood&metal Posted November 14, 2010 Author Posted November 14, 2010 I don't think the guy was a "poser" per-se... I'd guess he was around 60 years old, so I really don't think that was her angle... At any rate, I'm actually supprised that I haven't run into her while wearing heels because she lives in an appartment next to my shop, and since the weather's been cooler I often am wearing boots with heels of some sort if I happen to stop back by the shop in the evening... We had lunch again today.. I was just being the nice guy because she was stuck at home... Her daughter had her car today (as usual)... Even though I don't "like" her any more than friends, I may ask her to dinner and a movie some evening and show up in heels when I pick her up, just for $#!ts and giggles.... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Bubba136 Posted November 15, 2010 Posted November 15, 2010 I may ask her to dinner and a movie some evening and show up in heels when I pick her up, just for $#!ts and giggles.... I can't think of a better way to discover her "true" feelings about men wearing high heels if you did. It might just shock the "attitude" out of her. Or, it could reveal that her initial reaction was for your benefit -- so that you wouldn't think of her as being accepting of such things. After all, you two don't really know each other that well, yet. (Then, she mightn't ever talk to you again ) Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
Sumiko Posted November 16, 2010 Posted November 16, 2010 I would do it slowly if i were you A lot of people get shocked too easily by something unusual, which is pretty normal actually. Just mention that topic(of men wearing "girls" shoes) somewhere at sometime, however make sure that you don't make her think that you don't like those things either. Imagine if you were saying "i saw a guy with high heels on" a lot of people assume you bring up this topic because you thought it was weird or funny(not in a good way) so they say the same too "yeah, thats disgusting" either way, the best way would be to find something unusual about her, and then mention "what? really, you do that? Well, i have an unusual hobby too, that is [...]"
Bubba136 Posted November 16, 2010 Posted November 16, 2010 I really don't know if it would make any difference when woodandmetal told her about his wearing high heels. If she initially wasn't accepting of the fact, and could not ever change her mind, whenever he told her it would be a relationship ending occurrence. So, it would probably be "the sooner, the better" in this instance because, if his girlfriend could never accept him in heels, it would be "wise" to part company now because, prolonging the relationship would only be that much more difficult if/when affection has become strong. I'm sure that woodandmetal is already aware that his desire to wear high heels will never q2o away......and, if he gets together with any woman that does not accept him in heels, in any way, fashion or form, he's in for a miserable life with them....... Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
hhboots Posted November 16, 2010 Posted November 16, 2010 I agree its probably good to bring it out to her sooner than later. Of course do it when it feels right to you and you are comfortable doing so. You need to feel confident with yourself when you are doing it. From what I have seen of wood&metal's pics, you wear boots that don't absolutely scream out "feminine"... meaning your shoe choice is a little more gender neutral at first glance and with long jeans is not too obvious that they are heels. Of course, this is based solely on the pictures I have seen of you, I could be way off. At any rate, I like the look. With that said, you can try to make sure when you are going to see her, that you wear some of your lower heeled boots initially to test the waters and get her reaction. Then go from there. Just a thought, good luck!
wood&metal Posted November 17, 2010 Author Posted November 17, 2010 The sooner is always the better.. I've been down the road where I waited to disclose my like for heels and it blew up in my face... That said, I've also been down the road where I was accepted for wearing heels, so I know it does happen... Bubba is correct.. The heels "thing" doen't go away..(tried it) I don't think I like this girl more than being friends.. The attraction isn't there on my part, so in the long run it really doesn't matter what she thinks.. I'll still ask her out sometime though, and wear a pair of boot out of the "norm"... Maybe the boots in my avatar.. Maybe my Corral womens cowboy boots that have a 2.5" heel and very pointed toes... one of those two... hhboots is correct on how I try to present myself in heels... I have little desire to look feminine or flamboyant (sp?), although I might try a full on stiletto heel under long jeans sometime... Dark colored "skinny" jeans and dark pumps is look I want to try, at least to see if I can possibly make it "work", but that would be pushing my heeling comfort level...... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
wood&metal Posted November 18, 2010 Author Posted November 18, 2010 It's looking like friday night or saturday night for dinner... Should be interesting.. Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
wood&metal Posted November 20, 2010 Author Posted November 20, 2010 Dinner was tonite.. Totally uneventful.. I decided to wear the exact same outfit as the evening I had the "omg! he's soo gay" incident a few months ago.. Black t-shirt, "distressd" boot cut jeans, and the boots in my avatar... Only thing I kind of left out were my glasses, except when I was driving us to the restaurant.. I was a bit nervous when I went to knock on her door, but she was just done getting ready and kind of rushing to get out the door...in flip-flops (must be a Florida thing).... I kind of expected her to say something because I am about 2inches shorter than she is when i'm in my work shoes (nikes), but with the boots it makes me right about eye to eye with her, but nothing was said... I know she had a good look at my boots at least once because she tripped on a curb at the restaurant and lost a flip-flop for a moment... We had a nice bbq dinner and called it a night, early.. After a full rack of bbq ribs and a bust-ass day at work, you just don't want to move... It's hell getting old..lol.. On the way home we talked about going out again in search of a good place for crab legs and maybe a movie or something...I dropped her at home and chatted with her and her daughter (who I was a bit nervous about) for a minute then headed home... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
roniheels Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 hhboots is correct on how I try to present myself in heels... I have little desire to look feminine or flamboyant (sp?), although I might try a full on stiletto heel under long jeans sometime... Dark colored "skinny" jeans and dark pumps is look I want to try, at least to see if I can possibly make it "work", but that would be pushing my heeling comfort level...... You might try this look in private and see how you like it and then go from there. Good luck.
wood&metal Posted November 20, 2010 Author Posted November 20, 2010 Thanks Roni.. In private was what I meant, at least with the skinny jeans and pumps, to if it works for me.... I just can't quite figure out what kind of shirt to go with something like that.. I thought maybe a plain t-shirt and jacket... dunno.. Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Rockpup Posted November 20, 2010 Posted November 20, 2010 The idea of a "high heel'ed wing man" just came to me.. Any of you guys looking to broach the subject of guys in heels, get someone else from the board to walk on by in a pair while you are on a date/etc. This way you can see her honest reaction, and give you an excuse to say "you know.. I've..." (formerly known as "JimC")
wood&metal Posted November 21, 2010 Author Posted November 21, 2010 The idea of a "high heel'ed wing man" just came to me.. Any of you guys looking to broach the subject of guys in heels, get someone else from the board to walk on by in a pair while you are on a date/etc. This way you can see her honest reaction, and give you an excuse to say "you know.. I've..." That's not a bad idea, but it's a little...I dunno... why not more of a direct approach...? Something like, "Oh, hey that's my friend Jim over there...HEY JIM!:wavey:"... You (or which ever member) walk over (in heels of course) and be introduced to the date/friend,, or whatever the case may be... I'd bet the conversation after that kind of encounter would be interesting... I'd be game to go to bat for a fellow guy in heels.. Hell, I might even wear heels that are out of my normal public comfort zone if it might help a guy out... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
dblair Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 I don't like the idea of making a permanent judgment of somebody based on their initial reaction to seeing a guy in heels, most likely for the very first time (especially when the guy in heels is a complete stranger). Furthermore, even if she did like it, she might be afraid to say so because she may well be thinking that you would hate it. The only way you will ever get an honest answer about someone's feelings on something like this, is to be honest yourself. Either tell her (or show her) and let her figure out how she feels.
roniheels Posted November 21, 2010 Posted November 21, 2010 I don't like the idea of making a permanent judgment of somebody based on their initial reaction to seeing a guy in heels, most likely for the very first time (especially when the guy in heels is a complete stranger). Furthermore, even if she did like it, she might be afraid to say so because she may well be thinking that you would hate it. The only way you will ever get an honest answer about someone's feelings on something like this, is to be honest yourself. Either tell her (or show her) and let her figure out how she feels. This is the correct, bottom line answer. Sometimes we don't like the answer, but at least you get an honest response and opinion.
wood&metal Posted November 22, 2010 Author Posted November 22, 2010 I really don't see an issue of introducing a friend in heels to gauge someones reaction to the concept of a guy in heels... I think it would be a fair way to open that odd subject.... At any rate.. I did go out for lunch with her yesterday and there was no mention of my looks or boots or any of that from the previous night.. I don't know when we'll go out again.. Having her over with my folks for Thanksgiving was lightly discussed.. Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
wood&metal Posted February 5, 2011 Author Posted February 5, 2011 Little update..Better late than never... Since I last posted on this thread, I gave the girl a part time job in my shop until she can find something better.. We still go out for lunch, or run to the store to take a break and grab a drink & snack, but that's it... Business and pleasure don't mix in my world, and with this one it wouldn't matter anyway... Color me, not interested.... Having spent a good amount of time with her now, I find it funny how she'll tell me she's an open minded person (a tattoo-covered, tomboy, at that), but she'll think nothing of blatently ripping on someone for whatever she deems stupid-strange-whatever (clothes, looks, music someone's listening too, ect.)... I'm not sure if it's a result of being around the girl, or my crazy work schedule, or both, but my interest in dressing to impress and wearing heels is down to near zero... It's really a bummer because it's the only time of year where it's cool enough for me to wear boots and be comfortable... Oh well.. Hair?...I badly need a haircut, but the hell with it..wear a hat... T-shirt... Good enough.. Old jeans or shorts.. Nikes... Out the door I go.... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Dr. Shoe Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 I find that most people who tell you they're open minded are not. The more they tell you this, the more likely they are to be critical. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
Charlie Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 I find that most people who tell you they're open minded are not. The more they tell you this, the more likely they are to be critical. I agree with Dr. Shoe here. The fact that they're telling you they're open minded usually means they're actually compensating for narrow mindedness. I think we all know people who've never commented on our seemingly 'strange' shoe or boot choices and many of us attribute this to them just not being observant. I think the truth is that these are the truly open minded people in our lives. Charlie Everything I say is a lie!.......I'm lying
wood&metal Posted February 6, 2011 Author Posted February 6, 2011 Dr. Shoe and Charlie.. I believe you are both correct.. On the plus side, I did a few errands in my favorite boots this evening and it was refreshing... Never frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Charlie Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 No doubt that it's always a good day when you can get out and do your thing the way you want to do it wood&metal. Always! Charlie Everything I say is a lie!.......I'm lying
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